你们这些人 You People（2023）

兄弟 拜托
Nigga, please.
总之 我不是罪犯 好吗
Anyway, I ain’t no criminal, okay?
那是偷♥窥♥狂的指控 好吗
It was a peeping Tom charge, okay?
我在看里面 偷看我的孩子妈妈有没有出轨
I was looking in there, peeping to see if my baby mama was cheating,
这样我就能在抚养孩子上拿少点钱了
so I could get lower prices on my child support.
为什么要从窗户偷看
Why peep through the window?
因为我想看看是否有人 把她像猎枪装子弹一样打开
Because I wanted to see somebody have her broke down over, like a shotgun.
这个不会降低孩子抚养费
That ain’t gonna lower your child support.
法官看到她很浪 我孩子的抚养费就会降
The judge seen her being a ho, my child support will go low.
不能去找法官 “我看到她弯折过去了 法官大人”
Can’t go up in the judge, “I seen her bent over, Your Honor.”
“我应该少拿点钱”
“I should get less.”
法官不会因此让你少拿钱的
The judge ain’t gonna give you less money.
我以前做过
I’ve done it before.
-嗨 EJ叔叔 -嘿 宝贝
-Hi, Uncle EJ. -Hey, baby!
这是以斯拉 以斯拉 这是我的EJ叔叔
This is Ezra. Ezra, this my Uncle EJ.
-怎么了 你说什么 以斯… -以斯拉
-What’s up, Ez? What’d you say, Ez– -Ezra.
著名的EJ叔叔 听说了很多关于你的事
-Famous Uncle EJ. Heard a lot about you. -This is my uncle.
好
Okay.
是的 这是以斯拉 这就是这个男人
Yeah, this is Ezra. This is the man.
我的兄弟 好吧
-My man, all right.
好吧 我要去跟瑞妮问好了
Okay, I’m gonna go say what’s up to Renee.
你们都友好一点
-Yeah. -Y’all be nice.
我们要对以斯拉友好
We’ll be nice to Ezra.
你把这张信♥用♥卡♥留在这里 我们肯定会刷他
You gonna let this credit card sit here, we gonna swipe him.
他看起来像个美国运通卡 头发向后梳着站在这里
He look like an AmEx, standing here with his hair slicked back.
他在撒谎
-Oh. He lying.
好吧 好
-All right. -All right. Okay.
如果你想的话…就快点回来
Come back soon if you want.
以斯拉做了一个黑人文化的播客
-Ezra does a podcast on Black culture.
告诉他 以斯拉
Tell him, Ezra.
对 我做播客
Yeah, I do podcasts.
关于什么
About what?
文化
The culture.
你要说“文化” 却不说“黑人”
Oh, you’re gonna just say “culture” and leave “Black” out?
你得以某种方式拿到钱 宝贝
You gotta get that money some kind of way, baby, huh?
快给我150美元 别告诉她我要了钱
Give me $150 real quick. Don’t tell her I asked for the money.
-不会的 我移♥动♥支付… -给我诗珞珂伏特加
-I won’t. I’ll Venmo– -Give me a Cîroc.
也给白人版巴里·怀特来点喝的
And, uh, the white Barry White something to drink.
嘿 我有话要说
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! I got something to say. -I got something to say.
好 说吧
-Okay, say it!
这真不错 各位 这很不错
This is nice, y’all. This is real nice.
我从来没举办过这样的婚礼
I ain’t never had no, uh, wedding like this,
但我已经结婚三次了 没错
but I mean, I’ve been married three times. That’s right.
两次在法♥院♥
Two times at the courthouse
一次在贝尼哈纳
and then one time at the Benihana’s.
我们没有进行预约之类的
We ain’t had no reservations, nothing like that.
阿米拉 我表姐 我只想说 我对你和以斯拉有多高兴…
Amira, my cousin, I just wanna say how happy I am for you and Ezra–
姑娘 我们只想说恭喜你 你嫁给了这个白人
Girl, we just wanna say congrats. You marrying this white man.
姑娘 这些白人都来了
-Girl, all these white people are here.
只要你喜欢 我们就喜欢 对吧
If you like it, we love it, right?
我冲进了国会大厦
-I stormed the Capitol.
是的 我当时在那里
I did. I was there.
以斯拉想阻止我的
Ezra tried to stop me.
他是个自♥由♥主义者 但他是个好人
He’s a liberal cuck, but he’s a good man.
敬我最好的朋友以斯拉 他很友好又有想法
To my best friend Ezra, who’s kind and thoughtful,
但没想过 让我坐在我们黑人这边的桌子
but for whatever reason didn’t think to sit me on the Black side of the table,
这在审美上是合理的 你们知道吧
which just aesthetically makes sense, you know.
为包容和我们新发现的世代财富干杯
Cheers to inclusion and our newly found generational wealth.
他很早离开了家
“He left the family early, um,
让他的妈妈负责所有人 包括房♥子
leaving his mother responsible for everybody, including the house.”
在妈妈1984年去世之后
“And after Mom died in 1984,
希比特别无选择 只能搬到 新墨西哥州和他爸爸一起住
Xzibit had no choice but to move in back with his father in New Mexico.”
我想说… 我想说这是阿尔伯克基
I… I wanna say… I wanna say it was Albuquerque.
好 我想我们可以结束了 对
-Okay. I think we can wrap it up. Yeah. -I think.
那个疫苗…
That vaccine…
让你变成同性恋
makes you gay.
所以故事的主旨是
So the moral of the story is
永远不要和一个 不尊重你妻子的女人约会
never date a woman who don’t respect your wife.
不 我不是故意的… 我说错话了
No, I didn’t mean to– I said the wrong shit.
大家能听我说几句吗
Can I have everybody’s attention, please?
大家注意一下
Attention, everyone.
是的 我知道在婚礼当天 父亲做讲话是习俗
Yeah, I know it’s, uh, it’s customary for the father to give a speech on the wedding day.
但我觉得今晚我要强调一些事情
But I thought there was some things that I needed to, uh, address tonight.
当一个男人的女儿结婚了
when a man’s daughter gets married,
他们会说这个男人把她送走了
they say that the man is giving her away.
这种滋味确实不好受
Now, that’s a really hard pill to swallow.
因为你通常不知道
Because you don’t usually know
你要把你的女儿送出去 给的那个男人什么样
who the man is that you’re giving your daughter away to.
通常来说是这样
Usually.
但我觉得自己很幸运
But I consider myself fortunate,
因为我觉得我知道 以斯拉是什么样的人
because I think I kind of do know who Ezra is.
而他不是个醉鬼 吸毒 嫖♥娼♥的人
And he’s not a drunken, drugged-out, dream-chasing whore monger
不会和一群种族主义堕落的人在一起
who surrounds himself with a bunch of, uh, racist degenerates.
我没遇到那个家伙
I didn’t get that guy.
我遇到了这个家伙
I got this guy.
好吧
All right, okay, okay.
所以 敬我美丽的宝贝女儿
So, here’s to my beautiful baby girl.
干杯
-Cheers!
-我们爱你 -恭喜你
-We love you. Congratulations!
谢谢你 先生
Thank you, sir.
嘿
Hey.
以斯拉
Oh, Ezra.
谢谢你刚才在那里做的
Thank you for, uh, what you did back there.
我在那里做了什么
What did I do back there?
你的演讲
Your speech.
你本可以曝光我的错误
You could’ve, uh, could’ve blown up my spot.
但你没有 所以谢谢
You didn’t, so thanks.
好吧 不用谢 因为我不是为了你
Well, save your thank you, ’cause I didn’t do it for you.
我这么做是为了我女儿
I did that for my daughter.
你觉得我会在她家人面前 让她难堪吗
You think I’m gonna embarrass her in front of her whole family?
不会
No.
你不太了解我
You don’t know me too well.
但问题是
But here’s the thing.
我了解你
I know you.
我从一开始就了解你
I’ve known you from the very start.
我从开始就有你的电♥话♥号♥码
I had your number from day one.
对我而言 我不知道为什么我女儿
And for the life of me, I do not know why my daughter
要继续和你走这条路
continues to go down this path with you.
我很清楚一件事
There’s one thing that I’m crystal clear on,
那就是你很确定 绝对 明确的
is that you are absolutely, positively, unequivocally
对我女儿而言不是正确的人
not the right the guy for my daughter.
就这样
Period.
-为什么 -什么
-Why? -Excuse me.
为什么我不适合你女儿
Why am I not the right guy for your daughter?
好的 我该从哪里开始
Well, shit, where do I begin?
哪里都可以
Anywhere.
那我们从你的单身派对开始吧
Well, what… what about we start at your bachelor party?
我看到你在房♥间里 有脱衣舞娘和可♥卡♥因♥
When I saw you in the room with the strippers and the cocaine,
我们从这里开始如何
how about we start there?
不如我们从
Why don’t we start with
一开始你为什么要来 我的单身派对开始
why you were at my bachelor party in the first place?
你没有资格去那里 单身派对就是为了让人们变得奇怪
You had no right to be there. Bachelor parties are for people to be weird.
那不是我本来的样子
That’s not who I am.
好吧 是我该死的蠢朋友
Okay? It’s my dumb fucking friends.
可是你进去了 也达到你的目的了
But you deeboed your way in, and you got what you wanted.
我过得很糟糕
I had a shitty time.
事实上 只要你在我身边 我就过得很糟糕
As a matter of fact, I have a shitty time whenever you’re around.
你像是毁掉我生活的人 我不知道为什么
You’re like the cooler to my life, and I don’t know why.
因为事实是 我所做的都是
Because the truth is all I’ve ever done
爱你的女儿
is love your daughter,