You may remark that my vocabularyabchas taken a turn for the Anglo-Saxon.
你们或许注意到我开始在abc讲一些盎格鲁萨克逊语了
God, I’m gonna barf my brains out.
我的脑子都快被吐出来了
If I did actually barf my brains out…
如果我真的吐出了脑子…
…it would be a great loss to my discipline.
那将会是学术界的一大损失
Of course, many of my colleaguesabcwould be relieved…
有不少同事应该会暗自庆倖吧
…to say nothing of my students.
更别说我的学生了
It’s not that I’m controversial.
并不是我有多令人争议
Just uncompromising.
我只是不轻易妥协的那种
False alarm.
虚惊一场
If the word went around thatabcVivian Bearing had barfed her brains out…
如果传出了我abc不幸呕吐身亡的消息
…first my colleagues,abcmost of whom are my former students…
首先我的同事abc大多是我以前的学生
…would scramble madly for my position.
将会一窝蜂想窜上我的位置
And then their consciences would flare up.
当然他们的良知abc还是会稍微蠢动一下
So to honor my memory,abcthey’d put together a collection…
为了纪念我，他们会把各自对…
…of their essays about John Donne.
…约翰道恩的评论集结成书
The volume would beginabcwith a warm introduction…
书的开头当然会先…
…capturing my most endearing qualities.
…讚美我一些优点事蹟
It would be short but sweet.
应该不会很长abc但还是会很令人窝心
Published and perished.
出版一阵子后就会消声匿迹了
Now, watch this.
现在，我该按个呼叫铃
I have to ring the bell.
How you doing, Miss Bearing?abcYou having some nausea?
怎麽了，贝宁小姐abc又吐了吗？
– Yes.abc- Okay, I’ll be with you in a second.
– 是的abc- 好的，我马上来
Someone has to come andabcmeasure this emesis…
会有人进来…测量这些呕吐物
…and record it on a chartabcof my intake and output.
然后纪录在我的abc水分摄取排出表上
This counts as output.
这算是排出
It’s about 300 ccs.
大约是三百毫升
Is that all?
就这样？
It was very hard work.
这真的很难受
Yeah, it’s 300.
真的是三百
Good guess.
猜的好
Okay.
好吧
There anything else I can get you?abcYou want some Jello or something?
还有什麽能帮忙的吗？想吃些果胶吗？
Thank you, no.
不了，谢谢
– Are you okay all by yourself in here?abc- Yes.
– 自己一个在这儿还习惯吗abc- 可以
Not having a lot of visitors, are you?
你的访客好像不多吧
None…
严格来说
…to be precise.
一个都没有
I didn’t think so.
不会吧
Is there somebody you want me to call,abcor something?
需要我帮忙联络谁吗？
That won’t be necessary.abcI don’t want visitors.
不用了，我不需要访客
Okay.
好吧
I’ll tell you what.
那这麽好了..
那我会不定时abc进来看看你的情况
I’ll come in every once in a whileabcto see how you’re doing.
Make sure you’re okay.abcIf you need anything, you just ring.
确定你一切都稳定abc有什麽需要就按个铃吧
Thank you.
谢谢
Okay.
好
You just call.
有事儘管叫我
Do not forget…
别忘了
…that you are seeingabcthe most interesting aspects…
你们看见的是abc我这一生中最滑稽的阶段
…of my tenure as an in-patientabcreceiving experimental chemotherapy…
身为移转性卵巢癌病人
…for advanced metastatic ovarian cancer.
躺在病床接受著化疗
But as I am a scholar I feel obliged…
身为一个学者，我也该好好…
…to document what it is like hereabcmost of the time…
纪录一下这裡的生活作息
…between the dramatic climaxes.
其中当然也少不了的abc戏剧中所谓的精采片段
In truth, it is like this:
事实上也就是如此
You cannot imagine…
你们绝对想像不到
…how time can be so still.
时间究竟有多缓慢
It hangs.
你彷彿感受得到它
It weighs.
And yet there is so little of it.
但事实上它却已经所剩无几了
It goes so slowly.
它过得缓慢
And yet it is so scarce.
但却也同样稀少
If I were writing this sceneabcit would last a full 15 minutes.
如果要我描写这一幕abc我可以满满说上十来分钟
I would lie here and you would sit there.
我躺在这儿，而你们坐在那儿
Not to worry:
别担心
“Brevity is the soul of wit. ”
这短短的时间abc才是成就机趣的灵魂
But…
但是…
…if you think eight months of cancerabctreatment is tedious for all of you…
如果你们认为abc八个月的化疗是漫长乏味的
…consider how it feels to play my part.
你们就知道我亲身的感受了
All right.
好吧
Let’s say it’s Friday morning.
那应该是个星期五早晨
“Grand rounds” is what they call it.
他们称之为“主会报”
Action!
开始
– Dr. Bearing.abc- Dr. Kelekian.
– 贝宁小姐abc- 柯医生
How are you feeling today?
贝宁小姐，今天还好吗
– Fine.abc- Great, just great.
– 很好abc- 不错
Very late detection,abcstage is four upon admission.
晚期才发现的，第四期了
Hexamethophosphacilabcwith Vinplatin to potentiate.
使用Hex和Vin两种药
Hex at 300 milligrams per meter squared,abcVin at 100.
Hex每立方英尺三百毫克abc而Vin是一百毫克
Today is cycle four, day three.
今天是第四疗程的第三天
All cycles are at the full dose.
所有疗程都使用全剂量
Primary site is here, behind the left ovary.
发病源在这儿，左侧卵巢后方
Metastases are suspectedabcin the peritoneal cavity…
腹腔发现有癌细胞转移
…mainly in this area here.
大约在这一块
Full lymphatic involvement.abcAt the time of first-look surgery…
已经完全转移至淋巴组织
…a large part of the tumor was de-bulked…
在第一次的手术中，已经切除大部份肿瘤了
…mainly in this area here.abcLeft and right ovaries…
大约是这区域，包含左右卵巢
…fallopian tubes, uterus, all out.
输卵管及子♥宫♥的肿瘤
Evidence of primary-site shrinkage.
发病源的肿瘤已经变小了
Shrinking in metastasesabchas not been documented.
移转减缓还是第一次看见
Primary mass frankly palpable,abcin pelvic exam…
有些地方肿瘤还是很明显
…all through here.
在骨盆中的这一块区域
Excellent command of details. Okay.
非常详尽
Problem areas with Hex and Vin?
那麽使用过abcHex及Vin的地方呢
– Myelosuppression…abc- Myelosuppression…
– 出现脊髓生长抑制abc- 当然会有脊髓受抑制
…lowering blood-cell counts.
及红血球减少现象，这是正常的
With this combination of agents,abcnephrotoxicity will be next.
接下来可能还会伴随肾毒现象
Anybody else?
还有问题吗？
Side effects?
副作用呢？
Nausea, vomiting.
噁心，呕吐呢？
– Jason?abc- Routine.
– 杰森abc- 如同预期
– Pain while urinating.abc- Routine.
– 排尿疼痛？abc- 如预期良好
– Psychological depression?abc- No way.
– 沮丧焦虑？abc- 没有
Anything else?
还有吗？
Other complaints with Hex and Vin?
对Hex或Vin的评鉴呢？
Come on.
快啊
– Mouth sores?abc- Not yet.
– 嘴巴疼痛？abc- 没有
– Skin rash?abc- No.
– 起疹呢？abc- 没有
Why do we waste our time, Dr. Bearing?
我们不该浪费时间的是吧abc贝宁小姐
I do not know, Dr. Kelekian.
我不知道，柯医生
Use your eyes.
用你们的眼睛仔细看
Good grief.
这算是好事吗
Hair loss.
头髮脱落啊
– Come on!abc- You can see that!
– 拜託，谁都看得出来abc- 这不算吧
Jason?
杰森
Hair loss after first cycle of treatment.
第一疗程后就有头髮脱落现象
That’s better. Dr. Bearing.
很好abc贝宁小姐
Full dose?
全剂量
Good, excellent. Keep pushing the fluids.
很好，非常好abc要继续排出水分
– Jason, clinical.abc- Right.
– 杰森，你的病人abc- 对
Thank you, Prof. Bearing,abcyou’ve been very cooperative.
谢谢，贝宁教授abc谢谢你的合作
Wasn’t that grand?
场面真是好大
Full of subservience, hierarchies.
但全都是阿谀奉承，充满阶级压♥迫♥
Gratuitous displays, sublimated rivalries.
还有自我炫耀和abc昇华过后的敌视心理
I feel completely at home,abcit is just like a graduate seminar.
这感觉真熟悉abc仿佛又回到了研究所的研讨会
With one important difference:
唯一大不相同的是
In grand rounds they read me like a book.
在主会报中他们把我abc当成教科书一样研究
Once I did the teaching…
以前我是负责指导
…now I am taught.
现在则是被拿来指导别人
This is much easier,abcI just hold still and look cancerous.
这简单多了，我只要保持不动abc一副得了癌症的脸就好了
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