荒野大飚客（2007）

哇…呼！
Wha… Ho!
啊！
Whoa!
噢，伙计们，伙计们
Oh! Man, oh, man!
刚才在那里我差点摔下来了
I almost lost it back there.
不知道怎么搞的
I didn’t know what was going on.
噢！
Oh!
噢…
Oh…
人生苦短
疯狂一吃!
嗯
Mmm.
哦，亲爱的，道格？ -啊？
Oh, hey, babe? Doug? – Huh?
你可以送比利去学校吗？ 我今天有点忙
Can you take Billy to school? My day kinda got away from me.
可以可以，除非诊所里有急诊
Yeah, yeah. Unless there’s an emergency at the office.
喔，以前有过吗？
Oh, was there an emergency?
你知道的，牙医确实会碰上急诊
You know, dentists do have emergencies.
喔 -有时候
Oh. – Sometimes.
啊 -我们也是医生
Ah. – We are doctors.
嘿，不能吃，不能吃！
等你的低密度脂蛋白水平降到一百以下才行 Hey, no, no! Not until your LDL is under a hundred.
帕特兰先生，今年夏天有什么计划？
Well, Mr. Putnam, any plans this summer?
什么…他说的什么？
What’s… What’d he say?
他说我们要去非洲打猎旅行
He said we’re taking an African safari.
非洲，我想我有12年没出过辛辛那提了
Africa. I don’t think I’ve been out of Cincinnati in 12 years.
你应该出去走走，享受一下生活
You owe it to yourself to get out and enjoy life.
你活着可不能光为了工作！得有激♥情♥！
You can’t just live to work! You need excitement!
别这样，不要像个孩子
Come on. Don’t be a baby,
这是…喔，得用东西吸一下，挺住
it’s a d… Oh, the suction, the extractor. Hold on.
这玩意连斑点狗身上的斑点都能吸下来
That’ll suck the spots off a Dalmatian.
配合一下，好了
Help me, help me, all right.
知道他们把这叫什么吗？强力小吸管
Know what they call this? One powerful little sucker.
那是牌子的名字，难以置信
That’s the brand name. It’s unbelievable.
看见没，我的生活里激♥情♥可不少 帕特兰太太
See? I have plenty of excitement in my life, Mrs. Putnam.
鲍比？
Bobby?
凯伦，我说过别打扰我的
Karen, I asked for no disturbances.
我要和你谈谈，鲍比
I need to talk to you, Bobby.
理论上讲，我现在是在办公室里面
Technically, I’m at the office right now.
理论上讲，你是在家里的客房♥里
And technically, you’re in our guest bedroom.
瞧，我知道，老婆 我…只是得把这一章写完
Look, I know baby. I… I just gotta finish this chapter.
我知道，可你知道吗
I know. But you know what?
我得去干一份能给我们挣来钞票的活儿
I have to go to a job that actually makes us money.
我已经迟了，送我到门口
And I’m late, so walk me to the door.
来，鲍比，我要去工作，好吗？
Come on, Bobby. I gotta get to work. OK?
等一下，我落了手♥机♥
Oh, Wait. I forgot my cell phone.
在这等着 -嘿，老爸，听着！
Stay. – Hey, Daddy! Listen!
啊
Whoa.
嘿，停下来，小声点
Hey, no. Inside voice.
小声点 -你不能闭上你的嘴吗
Inside voice. – Would you shut up!
老天，家里就像住着一个会拉屎的汽笛
God, it’s like living with a car alarm that shits.
你穿成那样出去，是想去干嘛？
Whoa. What are you doing trying to leave the house wearing that?
你看上去像个爱斯基摩妓♥女♥ -老爸，你说到点子上了
You look like a Eskimo hooker. – Dad, that’s the point.
你想让自己看上去像个妓♥女♥？ -老爸，你太无趣了
You wanna look like a hooker? – Dad, you are so lame.
想要孩子去尊敬一个 不去养家糊口的男人是很难的
It’s hard for kids to respect a man that don’t do none of the providing.
我那个年代都是女人呆在家里 可不是啥事也不干的男人
In my day the lady stayed home. Not the lazy man.
你那个年代男人都得去修金字塔
In your day the men had pyramids to build.
你说的那是几百年前的事情了？
How old is that?
听着，我的家庭完全在我的控制之下…
I’m in complete control of my finan…
别叫了
No.
安静，来
Hush. Come.
为什么你说了一句话她就静下来了？
How come she gets quiet when you say something to her?
因为，亲爱的，她不在你的控制之下
Because you, my darling, have no control.
老公，我知道你的指南书某一天 会成为盖世之作
Baby, I know your how-to book is gonna be a huge success someday.
不过你记得今天是什么日子吗？
But do you remember what day today is?
不知道
No.
一年前的今天我们立下合约 你可以放一年的假
We had agreed that you would take a year off
去追寻你这个小小的作家梦 可是一年之期已经到了
to pursue this little fantasy of yours, but that year is up.
现在我们的合约要兑现了
Now you and I had a deal.
拜托，老婆，那个工作压力大
Come on, baby. Stressful cases.
客户又不情不愿
Clients under duress.
我已经厌倦了一天到晚和大便打交道
I’m tired of dealing with shit all the time.
还有，我们怎么知道 他们愿意让我回去继续干？
Besides, how do we even know they’ll take me back?
因为我打电♥话♥和他们谈过 -你说真的？
Because I called. – You’re serious?
你能回去公♥司♥十分高兴，鲍比
The Firm is ecstatic to have you back, Bobby.
九点钟你就有个活儿
You got a nine o’clock appointment.
你打的电♥话♥要修马桶？ -是的，男厕所
You call The Firm? – Yeah, men’s room.
肯定是哪个卡车司机拉了牛那么大的 一坨屎在里面了，老兄
Some truck’s driver must’ve crap an entire cow in there, man.
祝你好运
Good luck.
我不想把钥匙给他
I didn’t want to give him the key,
不过我不相信我的直觉
but I didn’t trust my instincts.
我亲眼见过我爸开枪射人 不过直到今天我才真正地尖叫过
I saw my father shot. I never cry until today.
昨天我这里被劫匪光顾过 而且我现在知道
I got robbed yesterday, and I know now,
你要干的是个倒霉活
your job is the bad one.
是的
Yeah.
达德利？ -是的，早上好，苹果
Dudley? – Yes, good morning, Mac.
情况如何？
How’s it going?
现在是上午九点
It is now nine o’clock AM.
谢谢你，苹果，请开启因特网
Thanks, Mac. Open Internet, please.
未知命令 -开启因特网
Command unknown. – Open Internet.
因特网已开启
Internet open.
我想我得研究一下换什么眼镜好
I think I have to research alternative specs.
搜索性♥爱♥ -什么？不，我没说那个
Searching alternative sex. – What? No. I didn’t say that.
想要奶奶把假牙取出来？[性暗示] -关掉
Want granny to take her teeth out? – Shut down.
农庄性♥爱♥网
Barnyard love.
非常抱歉 -享受人畜性♥交♥的乐趣吧
I’m sorry. – Enjoy the animals.
奶奶要打你的屁♥股♥
Granny’s gonna spank your bottom.
无限性趣
All kinds of fun.
我能把它修好
I can fix that.
或许修不好
Or not.
好吧，电子猫
Well, iCat.
看起来好像只剩我和你了
Looks like it’s you and me.
好的，兰利，你想告诉我什么？
OK, Larry, so what are you trying to tell me?
你破产了 -哦，怎么破的？
You’re broke. – Well, how does that work?
你把你的家当全都花光了 还超支了一些
You’ve spent everything you had, then spent some more.
看这里，你什么也没有了，零
This is right here. Nothing. Zero.
你知道吗
You know what?
或许是时候让我的“超级名模”老婆
Maybe it’s time for my wife, the “supermodel,”
来为我埋单了
to start paying for some things for once in her life.
你们就要离婚了
You’re getting divorced.
为什么她要给你埋单？ -离婚，马上还要破产…
Why would she pay? – Divorced, going broke…
你以为我就要崩溃了，是不是？
You think I’m falling apart, don’t you?
不是要破产了，是已经破产了
Not going broke. You are broke.
行 -你可以出去了
OK. – The door’s behind you.
不，不，你听我说，托比 我是不会任你摆布的
No, no, you listen to me, Toby. You’re not gonna push me around.
我们已经谈好价钱的 我也只会出那个价钱
We agreed on a price, and that’s the price I’m gonna pay.
你明白没？如果你不愿意，你可以不干
You got it? And if you don’t like it, just walk away.
告诉你，你可以和你的这宗生意吻别了
I’ll tell you this, you can kiss your business goodbye.
如果你敢耍我伍迪·斯蒂芬 你不会有好果子吃的
If you screw with Woody Stevens, you go down hard. You got that?
什么？不，钱不是问题
What? No, money is not a problem.
不要侮辱我，不要侮辱我！
Don’t insult me. Don’t insult me!
钱从来不是问题！
Money’s never a problem!
你只要兑现我们以前谈好的价钱就行 明白吗？
You just have to honor the correct price, you got that?
什么？
What?
好，那回家去，托比！你让我恶心！
Well, then go home, Toby! You make me sick!
我不能为了十块钱就扫这么多叶子！
I can’t do this many leaves for ten bucks.
那要花几个小时！
It’ll take hours!
那你为什么要在电♥话♥线杆子上贴个 “不管什么院子，十美元搞定”的广♥告♥？
You should’ve thought of that before you put that flyer
你贴之前就应该想到这一点！
on the telephone pole saying, “Any yard for ten bucks.”
托比，来，我们谈谈
Toby. Come on, let’s talk.
像男人与男人一样谈谈，好吗？
Let’s talk like men, OK?
出了什么问题？
What’s the problem?
钱就是问题！ -别小孩子气，托比
Money’s the problem! – Grow up, Toby!
我讨厌你 -我讨厌你！
I hate you. – I hate you!
笨蛋！
Moron!