怎样都行（2009）

探视时间结束了
Visiting time is over.
-什么 你要撵我走吗 -对的
– What? you’re kicking me out? – Yeah.
-说真的吗 -当然是说真的
– Seriously? – Yeah. absolutely.
好吧 听着 老实说 我真的很抱歉
All right, listen. honestly, I’m really sorry about all this
我该怎么补偿你呢
And is there anything I can do to make this up to you?
有什么能为你效劳的
Can I get you something? what can I do?
等我能走了 你请我吃晚餐
If I can ever walk again, you can buy me dinner.
你做什么的 海伦娜
What do you do, Helena?
我吗 我是个灵媒
Me? I’m a psychic.
不好意思 真的吗
I’m sorry. really?
我有罕见的天赋 可以预见未来
I was born with a very rare gift. I can see into the future.
如果可以预见未来 你怎么不知道…
If you can see into the future, how come you didn’t know
我会跳楼自杀砸到你身上
I was gonna jump out a building and land on top of you?
也许我知道
Maybe I did.
祝你新年快乐
Happy new year to you.
太兴奋了 霍卡明要卖♥♥掉健身房♥
We’re so excited. Howard is selling the gym,
我们合伙在切尔西开古董店
But we’re going to open up an antique shop in Chelsea.
是的 卖♥♥装饰艺术品
Yeah. Art deco.
拥有一系列绝妙的电影海报收藏
We’re going to have a wonderful collection of movie posters.
你相信这个吹牛皮的家伙吗 支持共和党的守旧派
Can you believe this cracker? this red state Neanderthal?
这位无知的国家枪♥械♥协会怪人
This mindless zombie of the National Rifle Association?
心理医生说 玩枪♥械♥表明
My shrink says that the guns were all
我性机能不全
A manifestation of my sexual inadequacy.
是 要不是性机能不全
Yeah, if it weren’t for sexual inadequacy,
国家枪♥械♥协会就要倒闭了
The National Rifle Association would go broke.
他跟霍卡明尼卡明同居
He’s moved in with Howard Cummings, Nee Kaminsky.
不只是跟一个男人睡觉 很快他要庆祝普林节(犹太教节日)了
And not only is he sleeping with a man, soon he’ll be celebrating purim.
更重要的是 他首次感受成年生活中的幸福
More important, for the first time in his adult life, he’s happy.
我早该知道你为何不满我 玛丽塔
I should have known why I was failing you, Marietta,
没能满足你作为女人的需要
Not fulfilling your womanly needs.
原因很明显
Which turned out to be quite considerable.
我也欲求不满 但和相互吸引的性别一起就不会
Mine, too, but not with the sex I’d been raised to be attracted to.
约翰 你变了 性格更加开朗
You’re like a changed man, John. your whole personality is sunnier.
维持如此就好
If only it had been that way.
跟你做♥爱♥真是
I couldn’t when I was making love to you.
方椎对圆孔
I was a square peg in a round hole,
原谅我说话隐晦
You should pardon the metaphor.
只希望你们都能找到真命天子
I just hope you 2 lucked out and found the right person in each other.
我走狗屎运
I know I lucked out.
你呢 博里斯
What about you, Boris?
用你们的时髦粗话讲
As you would say in the crude fashion of your generation,
我就是走了狗屎运
I totally lucked out.
正好表明了宇宙的或然性
It just shows what meaningless blind chance the universe is.
每个人都梦寐以求的真命天子
Everybody schemes and dreams to meet the right person,
我跳个窗就砸到了 还是灵媒
And I jump out a window and land on her. and a psychic yet!
来吧 说说荒谬的爱情
I mean, come on, talk about the irrational heart,
更别提我爱上了个南方姑娘
Not to mention I’ve developed a fondness for grits.
我有个问题 我属于我这一代人的吗
I have a question, am I a member of my generation?
是的 别担心 我会解释給你听的
Yes. don’t worry. I’ll explain it to you.
打住 打住 马上要倒数了
Hey, hey, hold on! hold on! the ball’s about to drop!
快
Come on!
8 7
Eight, seven,
6 5
Six, five,
4 3
Four, three,
2 1
Two, one!
新年快乐
Happy new year!
我恰巧讨厌新年庆祝仪式
I happen to hate new year’s celebrations.
大家都渴望玩得开心
Everybody desperate to have fun.
设法以某些乏味的方式来庆祝
Trying to celebrate in some pathetic little way.
庆祝什么呢 庆祝又向坟墓迈近一步
Celebrate what? a step closer to the grave?
所以我总说 无论你得到和给予怎样的爱
That’s why I can’t say enough times, whatever love you can get and give,
无论你能窃取或是提供怎样的幸福
Whatever happiness you can filch or provide,
所有暂时的善意 管用就行
Every temporary measure of grace, whatever works.
别自欺欺人
And don’t kid yourself,
这不仅取决于你做人的智慧
It’s by no means all up to your own human ingenuity.
你的存在取决于你不愿承认的幸运
A bigger part of your existence is luck than you’d like to admit.
上帝啊 你知道你老爸几亿精♥子♥中的一个
Christ, you know the odds of your father’s one sperm
找到仅有的一颗卵子 从而创造了你的机率吗
From the billions, finding the single egg that made you?
别想了 你会得恐慌症的
Don’t think about it, you’ll have a panic attack.
博里斯 你在干吗 跟谁讲话呢
Boris, what’re you doing? who you talking to?
什么 外面有人看着我们呢
What? there’s people out there watching us.
-有人在外面吗 -有 有啊 他们在看着 什么
– They’re out there? – Yeah, yeah, they’re watching. what?
-拜托 博里斯… -你知道…
– Please, Boris… – You know…
他们一开始就在场 不知道有几个已经走了
Well, there was when we started. I don’t know how many are left.
大家看到外面有人吗
Does anybody see anybody out there?
-外面 没啊 -没有
– Out there? no! – No!
-博里斯 -没有
– Boris! – No!
瞧 只有我能纵观全局
See? I’m the only one who sees the whole picture.
这就是所谓天才
That’s what they mean by genius.
快来 新年快乐 博里斯
Come on. Happy new year, Boris.