偷听女人心（2000）

想法也像个女人
You talk to me like a woman,
you think like a woman.
尼克，别装了
你是个典型的同性恋
Nick! Come on! Admit it.
You’re totally and completely gay.
我是吗？
你不是吗？
– I am?
– You’re not?
那你一定要告诉我
Oh! I mean, if you’re not,
you gotta tell me.
一定要告诉我那晚是怎回事
别再这么折磨我了
Based on the other night…
Just put me out of my misery.
你是，还是不是？
Are you or aren’t you?
说你是同性恋
我不是疯子
Say you’re gay. Then I’m not nuts.
I’m not undesirable.
我不要再被人甩掉
你是同性恋，承认吧
Not rejected by another guy!
Say it! Say you’re gay! Admit it!
好吧
Okay.
我是同性恋
I’m gay.
有多深？
How gay?
我是你能想像的最深的同性恋
Oh!
I’m as gay as it gets.
有一天，你会让一个男人很开心的
You’re gonna make some guy
very happy someday.
也许吧
Oh, from your lips.
上帝，我最恨掉眼泪的
God, I hate that
I’m crying.
听我说
Well, look it.
如你们的部门有任何人♥事♥变♥动♥
If things should ever change
in that department…
我一定会最先通知你的
你发誓？
– You’ll be the first to know.
– You promise?
是的，我发誓
来吧
Oh, yeah, I promise.
Come here.
哦，小子
Oh, boy.
很高兴见到你，尼克
我也是
– It was very nice meeting you, Nick.
– And you.
你的试验怎么样？
Thanks for pep talk, yes?
你们两个互相照顾
You two just
take care of each other.
谢谢你的小帽
哦，没事
– And thanks for the yarmulke.
– Oh, no problem.
别太心急
你放心吧，我会记住的
– You wear it well, yes?
– Happy trails, kids.
他好不好？
达茜
– Isn’t he great?
– Darcy!
我需要和你谈谈
I need to talk to you.
看看他啊，我知道他会
变得怪怪的
Uh-oh, look at him.
I knew it. He is weird about it.
这不是为了昨晚的事
是有关耐克的会议
This is not about last night.
It’s about the Nike meeting.
我真的认为你
And I honestly believe
in my gut…
该是去报告的人
天呐
– that you should make the pitch.
– Oh, God.
我昨晚让你觉得有罪恶感了
不，不
– I guilted you into this last night.
– No, no.
我只是觉得你会解释得更清楚些
不，不，不
– It would be better if you did it.
– No, no, no.
不…这是你的宝贝
你一定要自己上
This is your baby.
You’ve gotta do it.
我要先去和他们
在里面等你
I gotta go meet and greet
these folks. I’ll see you in there.
这不是我的宝贝
是的，就是你的
– It’s not my baby.
– Yes, it is.
如果我又一天消失了
I predict no one will even know I’m
gone until the files start to build.
不知谁会注意到
It could be days.
也许很久，有人会问那个带眼镜
And then someone
will finally ask,
管文件的家伙哪里去了
“Where’s the geek in the glasses
who carries all the files?”
你知有关这个艾琳的事吗？
Do either of you two know what
the story is on this Erin girl?
你说她吗？我怎么知道
是啊
– Miss Lonely Hearts? Who knows?
– Yeah.
我知道
她在这里两年了
Ooh, I know.
She’s been here two years.
一直想做编辞员，被拒绝了
She tried to be a copywriter
but got turned down.
然后她就变成了文件传递员了
谁拒绝了她的申请？
– So she got stuck as a messenger.
– What fool turned her down?
就是你啊
You did, sire.
我有面试过她吗？
Well, did I ever
meet with her at least?
好像没有，
我记得你叫我去把她打发了
I don’t think so. As I recall,
you told me to “blow her off.”
我现在想见见她
Well, I wanna meet
with her now.
她好像有点东西挺有意思的
The kid’s got something.
She’s kind of funny.
今天是你的幸运日，老兄
我刚刚看到耐克的代表团从电梯出来
This is your lucky day. I just saw
the Nike group get off the elevator.
全部是女人，你的强项
来吧，我陪你一起过去
All women. Your specialty.
Come on. I’ll walk you up.
我不喜欢让达茜这么过不去
I hate what I’m doing to Darcy.
I hate it!
我写信去解释了一切
I’m gonna write her
a long letter, confess everything.
你和达茜有什么问题吗？什么时候？
没有
– You’re doing Darcy? Since when?
– No!
我是说我不喜欢自己对她的态度
I said I hate what
I’m doing to Darcy.
男人总是不了解
你别说了，什么男人总是不了解
– Men are stupider. It’s true.
– Will you stop it?
是这样的
你什么时候变成全职女人了？
– They are.
– “They”? Are you a woman now?
我倒想呢，女人才会算计自己爱的人
Oh, I wish. A woman wouldn’t have
screwed over the woman she loved.
她们从来不会这么做
还有，你知道那些有关
No, they don’t think that way.
And another thing.
男人♥大♥小的说法吗
知道啊
– This thing about penis envy.
– Yeah.
都不是真的，她们才不在乎那个
Not true. No.
They don’t envy it.
一半的女人根本就不喜欢那个
Half of’em
don’t even like it.
你知谁才会最重视那个吗？
我们自己
You know who has
penis envy? We do.
我们还会耍手段，骗人
That’s why we cheat
and screw up and lie,
不过是因为我们觉得那是
男人身上唯一的武器
because we’re all obsessed
with our own equipment.
你准备好了吗？
是的
– You ready? Okay.
– Yeah.
谢谢
Thanks.
你不会站在镜子前跑步
You don’t stand in front
of a mirror before a run…
想着那条路会怎么看自己
and wonder what the road
will think of your outfit.
你不必去看他们的笑话
还要假装好笑才能在上面跑步
You don’t have to listen to its
jokes and pretend they’re funny.
不管你穿得多性感
跑起来都不会更轻松
It would not be easier to run
if you dressed sexier.
如果你没有用口红
脚下的路不会注意到
The road doesn’t notice
if you’re not wearing lipstick.
也不在乎你的身材有多好
It does not care
how old you are.
你不会因为自己比脚下的路
You do not feel
uncomfortable…
赚的钱多而不好意思
because you make more money
than the road.
你可以随时在想要的时候
And you can call on the road
whenever you feel like it,
踏上脚下的路
whether it’s been a day…
不管是今天还是几小时后
或是任何一天
or even a couple of hours