半梦半醒的人生（2001）

所有的行为都是为了生存
All action basically for survival.
所有的交流都是为了这种
All communication simply to keep this ant colony buzzing along…
以一种有效的文明的方式
in an efficient, polite manner.
给你零钱 ,纸或塑胶 ,借或贷
” Here’s your change.” ” Paper or plastic?” “Credit or debit?”
你想用它来给你增加些味道?
“You want ketchup with that?”
我不想要麦草 我想要真实的人的瞬间
I don’t want a straw. I want real human moments.
我想要见你 我想你来见我
I want to see you. I want you to see me.
我不想放弃这些 我不想只做天线 你知道吗?
I don’t want to give that up. I don’t want to be an ant, you know?
是,是,我知道
Yeah. Yeah, I know.
我也不想做天线
I don’t want to be an ant, either.
是的,谢谢你在那里撞到我
Yeah, thanks for kind of, like, jostling me there.
最近我好像是行尸走肉般
I’ve been kind of on zombie autopilot lately.
我感觉不到我脑子里有根天线 但我想我可能就像
I don’t feel like an ant in my head, but I guess I probably look like one.
就像是 D.H.劳伦斯想到会有两人在路上相遇
It’s kind of like D.H. Lawrence had this idea of two people meeting on a road…
不是匆匆过客
And instead of just passing and glancing away,
他们决定承认所谓灵魂上的面对面
they decided to accept what he calls “the confrontation between their souls.”
就像是释放了勇敢无畏的 上帝到我们中间一样
It’s like, um– like freeing the brave reckless gods within us all.
然后好像我们曾经见过似的
Then it’s like we have met.
我正在做这个项目 我想你也会感兴趣的
I’m doing this project. I’m hoping you’ll be interested in doing it.
那就是肥皂剧
It’s a soap opera,
所以 里面的人物是些在幻想的人
and, so, the characters are the fantasy lives.
他们是陷入其中的扭曲了的自我
They’re the alter egos of the performers who are in it.
所以你会深深明白你总想做的些事
So you pretty much just figure out something that you抳e always wanted to do…
你想要的生活 职业之类的
or the life you抳e wanted to lead or occupation or something like that.
我把那写了进去 然后我们也将你的生活乐趣
And we write that in, and then we also have your life intersect…
和其他人的写进了肥皂局 一些典型的肥皂剧
with other people’s in the soap opera in some typical soap opera fashion.
然后我也想让它以现场的形式表现出来
Then I also want to show it in a live venue…
让一些演员出场 所以情节就在荧幕上
and have the actors present so that once the episode is screened,
然后观众就可以
then the audience can direct…
用些菜单之类的在后面的情节中 导演这些演员
the actors for subsequent episodes with menus or something.
所以有很多的选择 尊重人们的能力
So it has a lot to do with choices and honoring people’s ability…
就是诉说他们想要看到的东西
to say what it is that they want to see…
也是为了用户至上 艺术也是商品
and also consumerism and art and commodity.
如果你不想要你得到的 你可以回馈
And if you don’t like what you got, then you can send it back…
或者拿回你付出的
or you get what you pay for,
尽管参与 尽管选择
or just participating, just really making choices.
所以,你想吗? 是的,听起来很酷
– So, you wanna do it? – Uh, yeah. Yeah, that sounds really cool.
我想加入 但是
I’d love to be in it, but, um–
但我想先问你几个问题
Uh, I kinda gotta ask you a question first though.
我不知道该如何说,但
I don’t really know how to say it, but, um–
在梦中的角色又会是怎样的呢?
uh, what’s it like to be a character in a dream?
因为我现在还没有醒
‘Cause, uh, I’m not awake right now.
我从未用坏过表 从四年级之后
And I haven’t even worn a watch since, like, fourth grade.
我想这也是同一块表
I think this is the same watch too.
嗯,嗯,是的
Um– Uh, yeah.
我甚至不知道你能否回答我那个问题
I don’t even know if you’re able to answer that question.
但我试图弄明白我在哪里 我怎么了
But I’m just trying to get like a sense of where I am and what’s going on.
那么,你是怎样的,你叫什么,住哪里?
So, what about you? What’s your name? What’s your address?
你在干什么?
What are you doing?
我…我…你知道 我真的不能想起来
I– I– You know, I can’t really remember right now.
我真的不能 真的不能回忆起来
I can’t really– I can’t really recall that.
但除了那一点
But that’s beside the point…
是否能挖掘这些资讯
whether or not I can dredge up this information…
关于 你知道 我的地址,或是,你知道
about, you know, my address or, you know,
我母亲的娘家姓之类的
my mom’s maiden name or whatnot.
我也从这种现实当中获益 如果你想
I’ve got the benefit in this reality, if you wanna call that,
以一种一致的观点来看待
of a consistent perspective.
你的一致的观点的是什么呢?
What is your consistent perspective?
主要是我同许多人的交流
It’s mostly just me dealing with a lot of people…
他们
who are…
给我一些资讯和和看法
exposing me to information and ideas…
仿佛很熟悉
that… seem vaguely familiar,
但是,与此同时
but, at the same time,
我好像格格不入
it’s all very alien to me.
我没有在一个客观的理性的世界里
I’m not in an objective, rational world.
好像,我一直在飞翔
Like, I’ve been, like, flying around.
嗯
Uh–
我不知道,这很奇异 因为似乎没有一个固定的状态
I don’t know. It’s weird, too, because it’s not like a fixed state.
就差不多是意识的痕迹
It’s more like this whole spectrum of awareness.
就像明明之中在飘动一样
Like the lucidity wavers.
就像 现在我就在做梦 对吗?
Like, right now I know that I’m dreaming, right?
我们好像曾经谈论过这事
We’re, like, even talking about it.
到目前为止这就是我 就是我的想法
This is the most in myself and in my thoughts that I’ve been so far.
我正在谈论做梦的事
I’m talking about being in a dream.
但我开始想
But I’m beginning to think…
这些事好像没有什么先兆
that it’s something that I don’t really have any precedent for.
绝对是唯一的
It’s– It’s totally unique.
环境的性质
The– The quality of– of the environment…
我所接受的资讯
and the information that I’m receiving.
比如,就像你的肥皂剧
Like your soap opera, for example.
那确实是个很棒的想法
That’s a really cool idea.
我以前没有提及这个 就像我身外的一些事
I didn’t come up with that. It’s like something outside of myself.
就像是一些从外部传给了我
It’s like something transmitted to me externally.
我不知道这是什么
I don’t know what this is.
我似乎我们被这个世界所限制
We seem to think we’re so limited by the world…
这种限制 恰好是我们自己制♥造♥的
and– and the confines, but we’re really just creating them.
你总想把它弄明白
And you keep trying to figure it out,
就像是你所认识和做的只不过是在做梦
but it seems like now that you know that what you’re doing is dreaming,
你可以做你想要做的一切
you can do whatever you want to.
你在做梦 但你醒着
You’re, uh, dreaming, but you’re awake.
你可以有很多选择
You have, um, so many options,
那就是生命的意义
and that’s what life is about.
我明白你所说的
I understand what you’re saying.
就我来说 我是个梦者
It’s up to me. I’m the dreamer.
很怪异 那些人给予我的
It’s weird. Like, so much of the information…
如此多的资讯
that– that these people have been imparting to me–
我不知道 这其中真的有很深的内涵
I don’t know. It’s got this, like, really heavy connotation to it.
那你感觉如何?
– Well, how do you feel? – Well,
有时我感到很孤独
Well, sometimes I feel kind of isolated,
但更多时候 我感到与他们联♥系♥在一起
but most of the time, I feel really connected,
真的,就像,自己被这种活跃的过程所吸引
really, like, engaged in this active process.
很怪异 因为多数时候
Which is kind of weird because most of the time,
我真的很被动 真的没什么反应
I’ve just been really passive and not really responding,
除了我,我想
except for now, I guess.
我只是尽情的沐浴在这种资讯当中
I’m just kind of letting the information wash over me.
没有必要被动地不作回应
It’s not necessarily passive to not respond verbally.
我们同时在很多层面上交流
We’re communicating on so many levels simultaneously.
可能你在直接的感知
Perhaps you’re– you’re perceiving directly.
我所遇到的大多数人
Most of the people that I’ve been encountering…
大多数我想说的事
and most of the things that I would wanna say,
就像是他们替我说了出来 而且差不多在我的暗示之下
it’s like they kind of say it for me and almost at my cue.
就像完全自己针对自己一样
It’s, like, complete unto itself.
这不像是个坏梦 这个梦很棒
It’s not like I’m having a bad dream. It’s a great dream.
但是
But…
这不像我以前曾经做过的梦
it’s so unlike any other dream I’ve ever had before.
就像这个梦
It’s like the dream.
就像是我在准备着什么
It’s like I’m being prepared for something.
站在这桥上 罗卡警告说
“On this bridge,” Lorca warns,
生活不是场梦
“life is not a dream.
小心,小心
” Beware and beware and…
小心
beware.”
很多人在想像 因为将来会发生
And so many think because “then” happens,
但现在不会
” now” isn’t.
但是我提到过现在正在发生的叫声”噢”了吗?
But didn’t I mention the ongoing “wow” is happening right now?
我们们共同制♥造♥了这种欢快的情节
We are all coauthors of this dancing exuberance…
我们甚至无力妄加评论
where even our inabilities are having a roast.
我们是自己的作者
We are the authors of ourselves,
共同塑造了伟大的 陀斯妥也夫斯基小说里的小丑
coauthoring a gigantic Dostoyevsky novel starring clowns.
我们涉及的整个事件即所谓的世界
This entire thing we’re involved with called the world…
是一个显示世界是多么疏远的机会
is an opportunity to exhibit how exciting alienation can be.