假期历险记

and she wouldn’t have done any of those things.
但你们知道吗
But you know what?
重点不是我有没有做过那些事
What’s important is not whether I did them or I didn’t do them.
重点是你们把极端不良的行为过于偶像化了
What’s important is that you guys are idolizing very bad behavior here.
你听上去可不像”黛比什么都干”
Uh, ew, you don’t sound like Debby do-anything.
我有种感觉她被神化了
I had a feeling she was all hype.
我打赌”喝了就上”根本不是她发明的
Bet she didn’t even come up with the Chug run.
嘿 等一下…给我听好
Hey! Wait a min… Excuse me.
“喝了就上”就是我发明的好吗
I did come up with the Chug run, all right?
而且我通关了
And I ran it.
-你说了算 -不 真的
-Sure you did. -No, I did.
-１６秒内好吗 -好啦 老婆
-In 16 seconds, okay? -Okay, hon.
-证明啊 -她做不了啦 她老了
-Prove it. -She can’t do it now. She’s old.
小妞 再说一次
Excuse me, girl?
我没恶意 我只是说…
I didn’t mean it like that. I just mean…
你老了
You’re old.
哦耶
Oh, oh, yeah!
从没听过你那样笑 我不喜欢
Never heard that laugh before. I don’t like it.
拿着我的包
Hold my bag. Unh-Unh.
为什么 我不…你不会是…
Why? I’m not… You’re not…
-你不是真的要过关吧 -是的 我要 老娘拼了
-You’re not actually going on this thing. -Yes, I am.
“喝了就上”募到过几千元慈善金 好吧
This Chug run raised thousands of dollars for charity, all right?
我在校时可能成绩不好
Now, I might not have gotten good grades while I was here.
但起码我有贡献
But at least I did something.
对 听起来你贡献良多
Yeah, it sounds like you did a lot.
你用手指头捅了院长的鸡♥巴♥
You stuck your finger in the Dean’s penis.
你知道 老公 重点不是…
You know, honey, it’s not important…
我用手指捅了或者我烧毁了什么 好吗
what I stuck my finger in and what I burnt down, all right?
现在的重点…
What is important right now…
是这些小贱♥人♥看贬我 太不应该
is that these Fuckin’ bitches are disrespecting me, and that ain’t right.
贱♥人♥
“Bitches”?
我想竭力嘶喊
I wanna scream at the top of my lungs
放马过来
Bring it on.
我想做从来没有做的事情
I wanna do what has never been done
没人能说我老了 去你的
No one’s calling me old. Fuck you.
好了 大咪♥咪♥ 酒拿来 赶快
All right, boobs, pitcher! Let’s go.
我想点燃火花
I wanna light the spark
快点 快点 快点
Come on, come on, come on.
一百万年跳动的心
The beats in a million hearts
我想和我的男孩女孩们跳舞
I wanna dance with my boys and my girls
3P 操妈的混♥蛋♥们
Tri-Pi, motherfuckers!
舞动着就像我们要掌控世界
Dance like we’re gonna take over the world
以爱的名义
All in the name of love
我想给我
I wanna get me some
整整一个晚上
One night it’s all it takes
老天爷啊
Oh, Jesus Christ.
我们走吧
Let’s go, go, go
我们走吧
Let’s go, go, go
我们走吧
Let’s go, go, go
三 二 一
Three! Two! One!
我们会展示所有
We’ll show them all
我们走吧
Let’s go
噢 老婆
Oh, honey.
妈在干嘛
What’s Mom doing?
她在…给这些贱♥人♥…一个教训
She’s, uh, teaching these bitches a-a lesson.
这是我看过最精彩的画面
This is the best thing I’ve ever seen.
加油 加油 加油
Go! Go! Go!
她怎么一直吐得这么厉害
Why is she puking so much?
是为了亚屎伯格症
It’s for assburgers.
3P 操妈的混♥蛋♥们
Tri-Pi, motherfuckers!
妈 你该多喝水
Mom, you should try and stay hydrated.
什么 你在干什么
What? What are you doing?
来点音乐怎么样
How ’bout some tunes?
我的天 太巧了
Oh, my God. I can’t believe it.
我爱这首歌♥
I love this song!
大伙儿 是席尔
Guys, it’s seal!
大家跟着我唱
Everybody sing it with me.
曾有一座灰濛濛的高塔兀立在海边
There used to be a graying tower alone on the sea,
一起唱啊
Come on, guys.
你成为我黑暗面的明灯
You became the light on the dark side of me
黛比
Deb?
爱仍在 像迷幻药而非普通药丸…
Love remained a drug that’s the high and not the pill
大伙儿 不唱
Guys? No?
你可知道…凯文
But did you know… Kevin?
下雪时…詹姆斯
that when it snows… James?
我的双眼睁大…
My eyes become large,
这歌♥手是男是女
Is this a man or a woman singing?
是男的 是地表最酷的男人
It’s man! And the coolest man ever!
他克服了狼疮
He overcame lupus!
宝贝
Baby,
你好比幽暗的玫瑰之吻
I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the gray,
全家竟然没人想飙歌♥
I can’t believe on one in this family want to sing.
陌生感觉 耶
the stranger it feels, yeah
《永远的蝙蝠侠》原声带
“Batman forever”?
你的玫瑰正盛开
And now that your rose is in bloom,
瓦尔·基尔默
Val Kilmer
光芒打破灰暗中的阴沉
A light hits the gloom on the gray
他回来杀我们了
He’s come back to kill us.
-油门加下去拉斯 -在加了
-Gun it, Russ! -Gunning it!
油表
爸 开快点 快点
You gotta go faster, Dad! Go faster!
-节能车开不快 -我们要怎么办
-The Prancer doesn’t go any faster! -Okay, well, what are we gonna do?!
让我看看…也许我要是按下这个兔子键…
Let me see… maybe if I press this rabbit button,
就会给加速什么的
it’ll, like, give it a boost or something.
好 试试
Yes. Try it!
-为什么会有这种按键 -为什么是兔子
-Why would there be a button for that? -And why is it a rabbit?!
好 嗯…火箭 火箭
Okay. Um… Rocket! Rocket.
-来试试 -对
-Here you go. Try that! -Yes.
-什么 -怎么回事
-What? -What’s happening?
-我为什么在旋转我在旋转 -我不知道
-Why am I swiveling? I’m swiveling! -I don’t know! I don’t know!
抓住方向盘 抓住方向盘
Grab the wheel! Grab the wheel!
-踩住刹车踩住油门踩油门 -好 我在踩…
-Hit the brake! Hit the gas! Hit the gas! -Okay, I’m…
我们死定了
I don’t wanna die!
好了 我握到方向盘了 我握到方向盘了
Okay, I got the wheel! I got the wheel!
好 好
Okay! Okay!
好了 我们要怎么办
Okay, what are we gonna do?
-我有个主意 -什么
-I have an idea. -What?
-手刹过弯 -什么
-Handbrake turn. -What?
方向盘打左 拉手刹车…
I pull the wheel to the left, yank the handbrake,
转180度 穿越安全岛 逆向开过他
we do a 180, cross the median, drive right past him.
你知道怎么做吗 爸
You know how to do that, Dad?
如果文·迪塞尔能 我就能
If Vin Diesel can do it, so can I.
-你凭什么跟文·迪塞尔一样厉害 -坐稳了
-Why are you as good as Vin Diesel? -Hang on!
我失算了
That’s not what I was trying to do.
-大家没事吧 -完了
-Everybody okay? -Oh, shit!
快走 爸 爸 快走 快走
Go, Dad! Dad! Dad! Go! Go!
哦 我的天 我的天
Oh, my God. Oh, God!
喔
Whoa!
搞屁
Oh, shit!
该死
Goddamn it.
好 孩子们 你们的房♥间
All right, boys. This is you.
我要霸占两张床
I call both beds!
你只有一张床
You get one bed.
你们如果需要什么 我和妈就在隔壁
If you guys need anything, Mom and I are right next door.
爸 我看到有个热水池
Oh, I think I saw a hot tub, Dad.
我能泡汤吗
Is it okay if I take a soak?
是的 是的 当然
Yeah. Yeah, sure.
但如果有人想把你拖进车里…
But if anyone tries to shove you in their car,
你要像我教你那样抓人
you give ’em a good scratch like I showed ya.
-我会的 -好孩子
-I will. All right. -Attaboy.
谢谢
Thanks.