热带惊雷（2008）

你个烂头巾!
Fuck your do-rag. Fuck your do-rag.
-准备开门 -1 2 3!
-Door! -One, two, three!
我去上面 你到下面
I go high, you go low.
趴下 趴下! 周润发们给我趴下
Get down. Get down! Get down! Chow Yun-Fat, get the hell down!
谁敢再抬头 我就一枪打死你个捣乱地鼠
If I see one more head pop up, it’s gonna be bullet Whac-A-Mole.
快点 快点
Come on, come on!
-烟雾弹 -别掉地下
-Smoke grenade. -Don’t drop it now.
给
Here.
-这是什么? -不知道叫啥
-What’s this? -I don’t know what it’s called.
我只知道它点着以后 满嘴胡诌是什么声音
I just know the sound it makes when it lies.
别动 火柴盒 要不我打烂你
Don’t move, Matchbox, or I will shoot you.
我把这衣服穿上 你别动
I’m gonna put on this thing. Don’t move.
我还看得见你
I can still see you.
奋力!
Tugg!
奋力?
Tugg?
找到你啦
Gotcha.
你赶紧卷铺盖走人 咱们回家了
Roll your shit up, man. We going home.
回家?
Home?
可我在这里一天演出5场 场场爆满
But I’m doing five shows a day for a standing-room-only crowd.
你不明白吗? 这里就是我的家
Don’t you get it? I already am home.
得了 伙计 你得…
All right, now, dude, you gotta get it…
我儿子送给我的
My son gave this to me.
-这是你的树枝朋友? -他叫树枝人
-That’s your stick buddy? -His name is Twigman.
他想跟咱们一块走吗?
Does he wanna come with us?
给我趴下!
Get down! Get down! Get down!
你们可能都听说过我 听说过阿尔帕·奇诺吗? 没?
Maybe y’all heard of me. Y’all heard of Alpa Chino? No?
我爱BB 哦耶
I love that pussy, hell, yeah, hell, yeah
他们不是你的单曲 老兄
They’re not your demo, dude.
六届MTV音乐奖
Come on. Six motherfucking VMAs, baby.
两夺最佳唱片 阿尔帕·奇诺
Two BET Awards. Alpa Chino.
象他在《情枭的黎明》里一样?
Like him in Carlito’s Way?
喂 你知道什么? 说英语 我不说你的话
Hey, yo, you know what? Speak English. I don’t speak that stuff.
你说什么? 嗯?
What’re you sayin’? Huh?
《魔鬼代言人》《热天午后》
Devil’s Advocate. Dog Day Afternoon.
《虎口巡航》《午夜惊情》
Cruising. Sea of Love.
真正的 阿尔·帕西诺
Real Al Pacino.
妈的躺好 那是完全不一样的人
Get the fuck down. That’s a whole different dude altogether.
你想干啥? 别碰那枪
What you doing? What you doing? Don’t touch that gun.
别动 别碰那枪!
Don’t do it! Don’t touch that gun!
我的妈呀 你要是敢动…
On my momma, if you touch that gun…
-见鬼 开打了! -从这走!
-Oh, shit, it’s on! -Over here!
-你在干什么? -我要给这些家伙
-What’re you doing? -I’m gonna give these boys
河内版的击掌问候
a Hanoi high-five.
掩护我 皮诺曹!
Shadow me, Pinocchio!
来点烟雾!
Smoke!
我靠啊!
Oh, shit!
杰夫 别那么做!
Jeff, don’t!
我做什么都无所谓了
It doesn’t matter what I do.
我这一辈子都是一团糟 没人会瞧得起我了
I’ll always be a screw-up. No one’ll ever respect me.
你说的不对! 你不是废物! 你让那么多人开心
That is not true, you are not a screw-up! You make so many people laugh.
他们只是在笑我的屁
They only laugh at my farts.
杰夫 咱们得走了!
Jeff, we really need to go now!
我就应该这个下场!
This is all I deserve!
笑个屁 混♥蛋♥们!
Laugh at that, you bastards!
好笑吧 好笑吧!
Hilarious! Hilarious!
咱们快走 他们再有16个小时就要醒过来了!
Let’s move. We only have 16 hours before they wake up.
看来吃晚饭的铃响了
Sounds like the dinner bell’s ringing.
这帮混♥蛋♥一会就会爬过来生吃了咱们
These assholes are gonna be crawling in here ready to fucking eat us.
好了 你在这儿望风
There. All right, you keep six right here.
来啊 咱们走了
Come on, let’s go.
你们这帮家伙在干吗? 快点走啊!
Come on, what are you guys doing? Let’s get out of here!
他正在迷离的状态
He’s on tilt status.
在演《月球探测器》的阿姆斯特朗时 我也这样过
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot.
他们在澳洲伯班克小路上找到了我
They found me in an alley in Burbank
我正想要乘一个旧冰箱来重新进入大气层
trying to re-enter the Earth’s atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.
你在说什么?
What’re you talking about?
快点 兄弟 我们快离开这里
Come on, fellas, we really need to go.
我不会为卡带式录像机做数码修复的
Daggomit, Blamtucky, I ain’t re-programming a VCR.
把火焰喷射器给我 你快去启动直升机
Give me the flame thrower. You gotta start the chopper.
-别管了 去他妈的 交给我 -没时间了 我来顶着
-No, fuck that! Just give me this. -No time! I’ll take care of this!
好吧 把你的铁钩给我
All right. Give me your hooks.
别担心了 我不会再戴上了
Don’t worry, I’m not gonna put them on again.
-快把铁钩给我 -好 给你
-Just give me your goddamn hooks. -All right. Here.
你快点把这帮孩子带回直升机去啊
Get those boys back to the bird, pronto!
靠啊 够了!
Shit! Enough!
假冒伪劣!
Fake shit!
快去找你的伙计们 带到直升机那儿
Go get your guys! Get them to the chopper!
我来对付这些野蛮人!
I’ll take care of these yahoos!
你一定要集中精力 混♥蛋♥ 跟着我说
You’re gonna focus up now, motherfucker, and say it.
-“我是奋力” -我是奋力
-“It’s me, Tugg!” -It’s me, Tugg.
好 那奋力是谁?
That’s right! Now, Tugg who?
-是谁? 我不知道 你是谁? -我?
-Tugg who? I don’t know. Who are you? -Me?
我知道我是谁!
I know who I am!
我这个家伙要扮演一个 假扮成另一个家伙的家伙
I’m a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude.
啥?
What?
你这家伙连自己是谁都不知道
You a dude that don’t know what dude he is!
或者你才是不知道自己是谁的人吧
Or are you a dude who has no idea what dude he is
你还得扮成另一个人…
and claims to know what dude he is…
你们他妈的说什么呢?
What the fuck are you guys talking about?
…才能说出来了解自己?
…by playing other dudes?
我知道我是谁!
I know what dude I am!
-你害怕了 -我没怕 我怕什么?
-You’re scared. -I ain’t scared. Scared of what?
应该是害怕谁吧?
Or scared of who?
-我怕谁? -来吧你俩 咱们快走!
-Scared of who? -Come on, guys. We really need to go!
你怕你自己
Scared of you.
-天哪 -到底怎么了?
-Jesus. -What’s going on?
全部人格都开始显露出来了
The dudes are emerging.
他说得对
He’s right, you know.
我不是
I am not
林肯·奥西里斯 中士
Sergeant Lincoln Osiris.
咱们快走
We gotta roll out.
我也不是神父奥马力
Nor am I Father O’Malley.
也不是阿姆斯特朗
Or Neil Armstrong.
我想我可能谁都不是
I think I might be nobody.
喔!
Wow!
跟你们在一起可真没安全感
The insecurity level with you guys is ridiculous!
-谁都有问题 -是啊 每个人都有问题
-Everybody’s got issues! -Yeah, man, everybody got issues.
得了 你可是 柯克·拉扎勒斯
Come on! You’re Kirk Lazarus.
就是因为你 我才选择当演员的
You’re the whole reason I got into acting.
记得你说过的每一句独白
I memorized every single monologue
我还在戏剧学校时
you ever did when I was in theater school.
-真的? -还有你 奋力
-Really? -Yeah. And look, Tugg!
我8年级的时候把《热天总动员1》看了24遍
I saw Scorcher I 24 times when I was in eighth grade.
你那电影让我绝对震撼! 爽♥死♥我♥了♥ 你真是个爷们!
That shit blew me away! I got high to that shit! You the man!
是啊 《热天总动员》第一部很不错 咱们快点从这儿离开!
Yeah, man, Scorcher I was great. Let’s get the fuck out of here!
奋力 奋力 现在就差你了!
Tugg, Tugger, you’re the last piece of the puzzle, buddy.
你的朋友需要你! 你跟我们走吗?
We need you! Your men need you! Are you with us?
我是公鸡做的梦
I’m a rooster illusion.
他妈的 回头对付他
Fuck it. We’ll deal with him later.
快点 快点 动作快点 走了
Let’s move. Come on. Come on. Double time. Gotta go!
快点 快点 快点
Come on, come on, come on.
太棒了! 开始行动
Bingo! Move out.
噢天啊
Oh, God.
学着对炸♥药♥说不 你个贩毒的小矮人
Just say no to this, you drug-making midget.
你要坚持住!
Gotta hold on!
四叶!
Four Leaf!
你长出手来了?
You grew hands?
伙计们 火箭推进式榴弹!
RPG, gentlemen!
你们这是去哪儿?
Where are you going?
天哪 这活干完了我改行开饭馆去
Oh, my God. I am moving to catering after this.