特雷弗·诺亚：但愿你可以（2022）

没错
Yeah.
因为我说某些单词的语调
The way I inflect on certain words
明显有种领袖的感觉
has a certain, uh, Führer feeling to it, apparently.
我当时特别震惊
I was devastated.
罗尔夫却觉得非常好笑
Rolf thought it was hilarious.
The whole ride home, we’re in the car, he’s hitting himself.
开车回去的路上 他一直在拍腿狂笑
“Oh mein Gott!”
“我的天哪!
黑人希♥特♥勒♥
“Der Schwarze Hitler!”
“Oh, Trevor, can you imagine if Hitler was Black?”
特雷弗 你能想象希♥特♥勒♥是黑人吗?
“It totally wouldn’t have worked, ja?”
那他肯定当不上领袖 对吧?”
我说:“罗尔夫 这并不好笑
Like, “Rolf, it’s not that funny.”
“I tried to learn German to connect with my family
我学德语只是为了和家人沟通
结果却听起来像是历史上最坏的人”
and sound like one of the worst humans in history.”
他说:“没错 但那真的很好笑
He’s like, “Yeah, but it was totally funny.”
你真该看看自己的样子
“You should have seen yourself.”
“It’s like you were about to invade the meat section.”
看起来就像你要 入侵那个肉类专区一样
老天爷!你真该⋯”
“Oh mein Gott!” “Oh, you should have–”
我说:“罗尔夫 你怎么这样?
I was like, “Rolf, it’s not cool, man!”
我正伤心呢”
“I’m in pain right now.”
他说:“冷静点 特雷弗 让我享受一下幸灾乐祸的感觉”
He’s like, “Calm down, Trevor. Calm down, ja?”
“Indulge me mein schadenfreude, okay?”
He actually taught me a new word that day.
那天他教会了我一个新词
一个我从未听过的词
Yeah. Never heard it before.
“幸灾乐祸”
“Schadenfreude.”
这是个德语单词“幸灾乐祸”
German word. Schadenfreude.
知道吗?
All right?
它的意思是 “从别人的痛苦中获得巨大的快乐”
It means “to take great joy in the pain and suffering of others.”
Fun fact…
有趣的是
这个词从未被翻译成其他的语言
That word was never translated into another language.
I wonder why.
真想知道为什么
不得了的词 不是吗?幸灾乐祸
Pretty insane word, right? Schadenfreude.
为什么会有人这么做?
Why would you want that?
从别人的痛苦中寻找快乐 为什么?
To indulge in others’ pain and suffering. Why would you…
但我又想了想 虽然听起来很糟糕
But then when I thought about it, I was like, “It sounds terrible, but…
但我们都会这么做
we all do it.”
Every one of us in this room.
包括坐在这里的所有人
我们都经历过幸灾乐祸
We all experience schadenfreude.
不是吗?
You know?
我们都是 你肯定有过幸灾乐祸的经历
We all do. You know when you have schadenfreude?
比如你在高速上开车的时候
When you’re driving on the highway, yeah?
速度平稳 一切都很顺利
And you’re cruising along, everything’s going well
然后你看向另一边 堵得水泄不通
and you look over on the other side, and the traffic is packed up.
And you get that little feeling inside.
你心里肯定有种感觉
“我的选择果然是正确的!”
Like… “I made the right choices in life!”
That’s schadenfreude.
这就是幸灾乐祸
You know what schadenfreude is?
你知道幸灾乐祸是什么吗?
幸灾乐祸就是一个黑人女性看到
Schadenfreude is what happened when Black women
那些中年白人男性得知迪士尼
saw middle-aged white men crying
要改编《小美人鱼》后 伤心至极的情形
after Disney said they were changing The Little Mermaid.
那就是幸灾乐祸
That’s schadenfreude.
那是我看过的最好笑的事情之一
That was one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen in my life.
一个成年男人在大哭
Grown men, crying.
“我的童年被毁掉了!
“This is ruining my childhood!”
“They changed The Little Mermaid!”
他们改编了《小美人鱼》!
她跟原版长得一点都不像!”
“She looks nothing like the original!”
“一点都不像”?
“Nothing”?
She looks nothing like the original, really? Nothing?
她跟原版长得一点都不像 真的吗?
你看到她之后真的 一点都想不到原版吗?
There is nothing that reminds you of the original when you look at her?
一点都没有?你知道 唯一改变的只有肤色对吧?
Nothing at all? You realize the only thing that changed is the color of her skin?
而且只有这部分的肤色
This part of the color of her skin.
头发还是红的 下半部分还是鱼
The hair’s red, the body is fish.
这都没有让你想到小美人鱼吗?
That doesn’t remind you of The Little Mermaid?
你在《小美人鱼》中唯一 注意到的东西就是肤色?真的吗?
That was the main thing that you recognized in The Little Mermaid? Really?
You know what schadenfreude is?
你知道幸灾乐祸是什么吗?
幸灾乐祸
Schadenfreude
就是
is what
所有来自
everybody from
爱尔兰和肯尼亚
Ireland and Kenya
以及特立尼达
and Trinidad
牙买♥♥加
and Jamaica…
…and South Africa… and India…
南非
和印度的人
听到
…all felt
新闻报道英国王室噩耗的感觉
when the news came out and said, “The Royal Family has bad news.”
很多人不理解我们 他们会说:“天哪 你是在笑吗?”
Here’s the thing people don’t understand. People are like…
“Are you laughing at this?” “Yes, first of all. But…”
首先 我是在笑 但是⋯
“…you’re misunderstanding it.” Right?
你误解了 好吗?
他们总是对人们对待 王室噩耗的反应非常敏感
The Royal Family always gets sensitive about people responding to their bad news.
But they don’t understand, that’s not really bad news.
但他们并不理解 那不能算是真的噩耗
每次英国王室都想让 我们为他们感到遗憾
Every time the Royal Family wants us to feel sorry for them
但那真是噩耗吗?
is it really bad news? Huh?
他们会说: “我们现在需要您的同情
They be like… [British accent] “Please, we ask you for your sympathy right now.”
我们失去了哈里和梅根”
“We have lost Harry and Meghan.”
“失去了他们?他们失踪了吗?”
“Lost them? They’re missing?”
“不
“No, no.”
你们最爱的英国夫妇 现在变成了美国夫妇”
“Your favorite British couple has now become your favorite American couple.”
-“王室传来噩耗” -“是噩耗吗?”
“The Royal Family has bad news.”
“Is it bad news?” “Yes, it is.”
“当然是啊 女王去世了”
“The Queen has died.” “Died of what?”
死于什么?
寿终正寝!
Finishing life!
You kidding? I’m not saying someone shouldn’t grieve
你在开玩笑吗? 我不是说大家不该悲伤
但女王是寿终正寝
but she finished life.
你知道有多少人没机会 寿终正寝吗?而她做到了
Do you know how many human beings don’t get to do that? She finished it.
她死时仍是女王 而且死于寿终正寝
She died as Queen. Died of what? Old age.
也就是说游戏被她通关了
That means you finished the game.
片尾字幕都出来了
Done. Credits are rolling.
Buried with the jewels.
还有金银珠宝陪葬
话题标签“赢麻了”
Hashtag “winning.”
你想让殖民地的人♥民♥伤心? 那是他们的珠宝
You want the colonies to be sad? Those are their jewels.
Africans are like, “Can we have our diamonds back?”
非洲人说: “你们能把钻石还给我们吗?”
他们说: “不行 钻石要陪女王下葬”
They’re like, “No, the Queen takes them with her.”
You kidding me?
开玩笑吗?
人们会说:“你不该这么说女王
People are like, “This is not the time to be talking about her.”
你不该说她的坏话 那不⋯
“You shouldn’t be saying bad things about her. It’s not…”
你不该说死者的坏话”
“You shouldn’t be speaking ill of the dead.”
不 这正是我们该做的事
No, that’s exactly what you should do.
Yeah, the perfect time to talk shit about people is when they’re dead.
说一个人坏话的 最佳时机就是等他们死了
懂吗?
All right?
Can we agree on this in society?
我们能在这方面达成共识吗?
大家都活着的时候对彼此好点
Maybe be nicer to each other when we’re alive
等有人死了再说他们的坏话
and let’s talk shit when people die.
行吗?
All right?
Do that for me, people.
各位 答应我
我死了之后 你们怎么说我都行
When I’m dead, say whatever you want about me.
但是如果在街上 看到我 打个招呼就好
When you see me in the streets, just say hi.
You know why? ‘Cause I’m gone.
知道为什么吗?因为我死了
有些人说
People are like…
“These people up there dancing on her grave.”
“居然有人在女王的坟墓上跳舞”
坟墓不就是用来干这个的吗? 不然为什么建成平的?
Yeah, that’s what graves are for. That’s why they made them flat.
The whole point was people could dance on them.
目的就是为了让人在上面跳舞
不然为什么不堆成斜的? 一跳就会滑下来
Otherwise, they would’ve made them slanted so you would slide off.
即使是那样 女王也赢麻了
And even in that, the Queen is winning.
因为在她的墓地上 跳舞的都是顶级舞者
She’s got some of the best dancers dancing on her grave. Huh?
Can you imagine the Africans coming in?
你能想象非洲人过来的情景吗?
他们在那儿跳舞的样子?
They’re just there, huh, doing their thing?
然后爱尔兰人说: “下一个该我们了
Then the Irish are like, “We’re up next. Hey!”
坟墓上也给我们留点空”
“Oh, save us some space on the grave.”
接下来是印度人“该轮到我们了”
You’ve got the Indians coming in. “Now it’s our moment.”
最后是加勒比人 边唱边跳:“她写下了谋杀”
Finally, everyone from the Caribbean… ♪ Murder, she wrote ♪
来点掌声!
Give it up!
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One of my favorite things