他们已不再变老（2018）

我青春的每一寸时光
‘I gave every part of my youth
都献给了一场野蛮的战争
to do a job and to go through a savage war.’
这场战争持续了很多年
‘It was a different war from year to year
并且每个人对它态度都不尽相同
and one’s reactions were completely different.
这场战争强度变化十分剧烈
The intensity changed so much that
倘若一名军人1914年退伍回家
anybody who’d been out in 1914
1917年又重新回到战场
and went home, then came back in 1917,
他完全认不出来这是同一场战争
wouldn’t recognise it as the same war.’
我只说一件事 我绝不会错过它的
‘I could only say one thing: I wouldn’t have missed it.
有时它的确很可怕 但是我绝不会错过
It was terrible at times, but I wouldn’t have missed it.’
没错 要是可以重新来过
‘Oh, yes, if I could have my time again,
我会选择重新经历一遍
I’d go through it all over again
因为我很享受服役的日子
because I enjoyed the service life.’
我想说我这辈子从来没有那么兴奋过
‘I could only say that I have never been so excited in my life.
感觉就像是一个男孩第一次玩游戏一样
This was like a boy going to the play for the first time.’
我从没觉得这有什么不正常的
‘I never realised there was anything unusual about it.
有一项工作需要人去做 你就去了
There was a job to be done and you just got on and did it.’
我们被灌输的思想就是
‘We were all instilled with that idea
这是场战争 我们必须杀死德国人
that this was war and that we’d got to kill the Germans
我们就是这样看待这件事的
and this was how we looked at the thing.’
我不曾后悔有这样的经历
‘I don’t regret having experienced it.
我希望我没经历过 但是我并不后悔
I wish I hadn’t, but I don’t regret it,
因为我很安全
because I’m safe. ‘
在法国的时候 有好时光也有不好的时光
‘There were good times and bad times in France,
但是你要不以物喜 不以己悲
but you took the rough with the smooth.’
我有两次负伤和中毒气 但是我并不担心
‘I was twice wounded and gassed, but it just didn’t worry me.
我只能尽力做到最好
I just made the best of it.’
像其他人一样 从容面对
‘Just took it in its stride, like everybody else.
我们很高兴能参与其中 都以为会很艰难
We were glad to be in it and we expected it to be rough,
也的确很艰难 但是没有人抱怨
and it was rough, but we didn’t complain.’
没什么真正值得兴奋的
‘There was no real excitement about it.
在看过了无数的尸体
You’d seen death so many times,
见过无数的伤员之后
you’d seen wounded so many times,
血并不会让你感到兴奋
blood didn’t excite you.
我们是专业的
We were professionals and,
对我们而言这只是一份工作而已
to us, it was just a job of work.’
要说有人享受战争 这是不对的
‘It would be a fallacy to say that one enjoyed it,
但在那之后会有种美好温暖的内心感受
but one got afterwards a nice, warm inner feeling
这对我是十分受益的
that one had been of some use.’
它对我的影响并不是很大
‘It didn’t affect me very much,
因为我当时还涉世未深
because I wasn’t sufficiently up in the ways of the world.
我还是个孩子 像那的很多小伙子一样
I was only a kid, like other blokes there.
除了真切的炮声和其他类似的东西
It was more like a great, big game to be enjoyed,
它更像是一场令人享受的宏伟比赛
apart from the actual shelling and all that sort of thing.’
它让我成了一个真正的男人 是的
‘It made me a man, yes, it did.
我想如果当时我没有参军的话
I don’t think I should have ever been the man I am
我不会成为现在这样的人
if it hadn’t been for having to serve.’
你必须要学会照顾你自己
‘You’d learn to look after yourself
在家里 妈妈会帮你做所有的家务
whereas, in your civilian life, your mother did all the chores.
在这里 你不得不学习做饭
You’ve got to learn how to cook
学习补袜子
for yourself, darn your own socks,
还要为自己补纽扣等等这类事情
sew on your own buttons and all the things like that.’
仅仅一天之后
‘It was just a day’s work.
我就知道我并不孤单
I knew that I was not alone.
我明白了我并不是一个人在打仗
I knew that I wasn’t fighting the war by myself
还有其他人的遭遇同样会发生在我的身上
and that what happened to other people might happen to me.’
我并不后悔 但是你看
‘I had no regrets at all but, you see,
我没有妻子 没有女儿 什么都没有
I had no wife, no girl, no nothing.
没有遗憾 没有畏惧
No regrets and no horrors…
因为如果你能熬过战争
…because, if you survive that,
就没有什么熬不过去的了
you can survive anything.’
他们已不再变老
我们知道英德之间
‘We were aware there was sort of
有一点相互讨厌的感觉
a nasty feeling between England and Germany,
正如我们熟知的凯撒大帝扩张领土的野心
as we knew of the Kaiser’s ambition to expand his empire
还有诸如此类的史实
and all that sort of thing.’
那个夏天
‘During that summer,
很多人讨论巴尔干半岛上不断上演的冲突
there was a lot of talk about trouble going on in the Balkans,
1914年奥匈帝国继承人在此被一塞尔维亚青年刺杀拉开了一战的帷幕
但是我们距离巴尔干半岛很遥远
but we were a long way from the Balkans
我们一点也不担心
and it didn’t worry us at all.’
这是塞尔维亚自己的事 不是吗
‘It was that Serbia business, wasn’t it?
塞尔维亚 那个家伙被枪杀的时候
Serbia, when that chap was shot.’
我当时很关心政♥治♥
‘I was paying attention to politics
我意识到英德之间
and I realised there was going to be
将会出现大的矛盾
trouble between England and Germany.’
那是8月4日一个令人愉悦的早晨
‘Well, it was a lovely August 4th morning.’
我们所有人都围坐在桌旁
‘We were all seated round the table
开始了和德国队的
and we were starting the rugby football
橄榄球晚宴
dinner with the German team.
一个德国人 旁边一个英国人
There was a German here and next to him was an Englishman,
再旁边又是德国人 这样一直往后排
and next to him was a German, and so on and so on.
晚宴中间 有一个人跑了进来
And a runner arrived into the middle of this dinner
宣布了战争爆发了这一爆♥炸♥性新闻
with extraordinary news of outbreak of war.’
当时有一个大标语”向德意志宣战”
‘There was a big placard: “War declared on Germany.”‘
我们当时并不知道该怎么做
‘We didn’t know what we ought to do,
是该从桌子上抄起一把刀
whether we ought to seize a knife off the table
插到德国人身上还是怎么
and plunge it into the German or what,
但是经过一个小小的讨论
but after a little bit of discussion
我们决定 对我们而言
we decided that, as far as we were concerned,
战争明天开始 派对继续进行
the war was going to start tomorrow, and the party proceeded.’
我为自己身为英国人而自豪
‘I’m proud of being a Britisher.
英国人♥民♥
我觉得英国是世界上最好的国家
I mean, I think we’re as good a country as any in the world
你必须要准备好为她而战
and you’ve got to be prepared to fight for that.’
毫无疑问 对于第一次世界大战
‘There’s no doubt about it, in the First World War,
今日就参军
我们做好了准备
we prepared for war.’
大英帝国势不可挡 我们不惧任何敌人
The Empire was strong. We weren’t afraid of anyone.’
所有人都买♥♥小徽章 挥舞小旗子 唱着歌♥
‘Everybody bought little buttons and waved flags and sang songs.
英国妇女高喊”冲啊”
当时完全没有绝望的气氛
There was no feeling of despair about it at all.’
英国绝不可能会输
‘England couldn’t possibly lose,
无论德国人让多少
no matter how many Germans pushed
英国人葬身海峡之中
how many Englishmen into the Channel,
他们也不可能更进一步
they’d get no further.
我们绝不会输
We couldn’t possible lose.’
我们一直被教育
‘We were brought up to think that
一个英国士兵抵得上十个德国士兵
one Englishman’s worth ten Germans.’
大英帝国的敌人就是
‘I thought that any enemy of England
我个人的敌人 我想参与到战争中
was an enemy of mine and I wanted to be in it.’
差不多一年半载战争就会结束了
‘Oh, six months or 12 months and it’d be all over
小伙子 快来帮忙
胜利就是这么简单
and Bob’s your uncle.’
我和一个朋友一起去了帝国剧院
‘I went with a friend of mine into Shepherd’s Bush Empire
那正在播放影片
to see the picture show there and they
正在展示军队在公海航行的画面
showed the fleet sailing the high seas
还播放着”大不列颠人♥民♥永不为奴”
and played, “Britons never shall be slaves.”
爸爸 你在那场伟大战争中做了什么
你会感到微微有些战栗
One feels that little shiver run up their back
并且你心里明白必须要做些什么
and you know you’ve got to do something.’
一个朋友跟我说”我们必须参军”
‘A friend of mine said to me, “We’re going to join up.”
我想这是爱国主义的表现
It was from the patriotic point of view
还有从整个事件中受到的鼓舞
and from the general excitement of the whole affair, I suppose.’
我并不是很想打仗
‘I didn’t believe in war to that extent,
但是我准备好了
but I was prepared to do my part.’
在那些岁月里 人们很少为自己考虑
‘You see, in those days, men weren’t to think for themselves.
他既快乐又满足 你呢
他们所做的一切都只是服从命令
They just had to do what they were told
仅此而已
and that’s all there was to it.’
我母亲为此感到非常的委屈
‘Oh, my mother was very aggrieved about it
来做你该做的事情
立刻加入
但是 作为一个年轻人 要自己决定自己的道路
but, you know, a young man, you decide you’re going to go.’
午饭时候 我离开办公室独自去了征兵办
‘At lunch time, I left the office, went along to Armoury House