七年之痒（1955）

我刚在厨房♥里准备早餐 突然间我想到
If my wife walked in with you in the shower,meanwhile making toast
要是我太太走了进来 而你在浴室 我在烤肉桂面包
she’d probably shoot me.
她可能会开枪杀了我
Of course. If I was married…
她当然会啦 如果我结了婚…
…and came in on my husband making toast for a blond,I’d shoot him.
回到家看到老公在烤肉桂面包 还有个金发美女在浴室内
– You would? – Bang,bang,bang!
– 我也会开枪 – 你会？
Right in the head.
向着头开
Come on now,relax.
放松
– You’re just making this all up. – That’s right.
– 都是你在胡思乱想而已 – 是的
I don’t suppose if she had come in she’d shoot me.
事实上 如果她真的回来了 也不会开枪杀我
She’d be mad,maybe throw an ashtray.
她会很生气 哭个不停 乱丢烟灰缸
– Just that? – She probably wouldn’t even do that.
– 只是乱丢烟灰缸？- 甚至烟灰缸也不丢
If she found you in the shower…
如果海伦回家发现你在浴室 知她会怎样想吗？
…she’d probably think you were the plumber.
她可能会认为你是水电工人
– A blond plumber? – Absolutely. She trusts me implicitly.
– 水电工是个金发美女？- 没错 她非常信任我
– Doesn’t she love you? – Oh,she loves me.
– 她怎么了 她不爱你？- 她爱我
She worries about me.
她很担心我
I had a cough,and she made me stop smoking.
我一吸烟就咳个不停 她就逼我戒烟
– She loves me,all right. – Isn’t she jealous?
– 她很爱我 – 她不会担心吗？
Not really. How can anybody be jealous of somebody with a briefcase…
为什么海伦要担心？为什么要担心提公文包的人？
…who’s getting a little pot and can’t keep his eyes open past 9?
我一向循规蹈矩 到了9点半就上♥床♥睡觉
She trusts me. It’d never occur to her that I–
她信任我 从不怀疑 我去年圣诞参加公♥司♥派对后回家
Last Christmas,I came home with lipstick on my collar.
我领口上有口红印
Helen said,”What’s that on your collar,cranberry sauce?”
知海伦说什么吗？她说 领口上的是红莓汁吗？
– That’s bad. – You know who kissed me? Mrs. Brady.
– 太糟糕了 – 知谁亲我吗？是布兰迪太太
Face it,no pretty girl wants me,she wants Gregory Peck.
面对现实吧 美女都不会喜欢我的 她们喜欢格利高里·派克
Is that so? How do you know what a pretty girl wants?
才不是呢 不是吗？你怎知道美女要的是什么？
I don’t know,but I imagine–
事实上我并不知道 我只是想象美女…
Your imagination! You think every girl’s a dope.
你和你的想象力 都以为女孩子全是傻瓜
You think a girl goes to a party and there’s some guy…
以为女孩在派对上 看到高大英俊的男人
…in a fancy striped vest strutting around…
虎视眈眈地向她们打眼色
…giving you that I’m-so-handsome- you-can’t-resist-me look.
暗示 我是帅哥 你挡不了
From this she’s supposed to fall flat on her face.
女孩子们便会被迷住
Well,she doesn’t fall on her face.
她们不会的
But there’s another guy in the room,over in the corner.
但在派对 一个站在角落的男人
Maybe he’s nervous and shy and perspiring a little.
他或者很紧张 害羞 而且满头大汗
First,you look past him.
一开始或许不会注意他
But then you sense that he’s gentle and kind and worried.
但渐渐会感到他的温和 仁慈 而且谨慎
That he’ll be tender with you,nice and sweet.
他会对你温柔体贴
That’s what’s really exciting.
那才是真正令人兴奋的
If I were your wife,I’d be very jealous of you.
如果我是你太太 我会很担心你
I’d be very,very jealous.
会非常非常的担心
I think you’re just elegant.
我觉得你好棒
Thank you.
谢谢
Aren’t you going to answer it?
你不去开门吗？
– Answer what? – The doorbell.
– 去什么？- 开门啊
Go ahead,I’ll put the cinnamon on the toast.
去开门吧 我去烤肉桂面包
Tom MacKenzie!
汤姆·麦肯齐
– Dickie-boy.morning morning,- .What are you doing here?
– 早安 迪克仔 – 你来这做什么
– Don’t call me “Dickie-boy.” – I just come from the country. Got a date with my agent.
– 还有别叫我迪克仔 – 我刚从乡下开车来 跟我的经纪约好了
– Is that coffee I smell? – No.
– 你在煮咖啡吗？- 不是
I’m glad I caught you. We’ve got important family business to discuss.
很高兴能在你上班前找到你 我有一件很重要的家事要跟你讨论
– Are you sure that’s not coffee? – Positive. what family?
– 你肯定你没煮咖啡？- 我很肯定 是什么家事？
My family?
我的家事？
Sure your down
当然是你的家事
I was driving down and Helen asked me to stop by and ask you–
我开车来 海伦要我问你…
Helen,she did? I’m glad she did…
海伦 她真的那么做了？很开心她真的做了
…because I wanna talk to you.
因为我想跟你谈谈
What’s the matter,Dickie-boy?
怎么了？迪克仔 你真的很奇怪啊
You think you’re pretty fancy with the blinkers on the horses.
你以为很幽默？还帮马戴上眼罩
What you talking about? What blinkers? What horses?
你说什么？什么眼罩？马？
And no driver and no other people.
没有马夫及闲杂人等
– You drunk or something? – No,I’m not drunk.
– 你喝醉了吗？- 不 我没醉
– You took Helen on a hayride. – No,in fact,I didn’t.
– 你昨晚带海伦去观光 对吧？- 不 其实我没去
She went with the other people,6♥4♥ toghter.
她和别人去了 一共有6♥4♥个人
She went no horse,and it was like a bus
他们也没坐马车 他们是坐巴士去的
– That’s your story. – I have terrible hay fever.
– 那是你编的 – 我不敢去 因我有严重的稻草热
I’ve had it ever since the Army.
应该说是鼻窦炎才对 从军后就一直有这问题
This doctor took a wad of cotton. He went in and down–
那位少尉军医 拿着棉花棒不断擦我鼻子 不断擦上擦下
In and down. “inwardly,downwardly pulsating!
内在 外在 悸动 心动
Now together,ending and unending! Now,now!” I know all about it.
在一起 未完待续 好了 我知道你的屎桥
– You’re drunk. – Get out!
– 你饮醉了 – 你给我滚
– If Helen sent you to get a divorce– – Divorce?
– 告诉海伦 如她要你来跟我谈离婚 – 离婚？
I absolutely refuse!
我坚决反对
Helen don’nt sent me for divorce. She sent me for the paddle.
海伦不是要我来跟你谈离婚 她要我来拿瑞奇的桨
I’ll fight it in every court!
– 我要跟她坚持到底
I can explain the stairs,the blond in the kitchen.
因为我可以解释 楼梯 烤肉桂面包 厨房♥的金发美女
– Wait,just take easy,what blond in the kitchen? – Wouldn’t you like to know?
– 等等 别激动 金发美女在厨房♥？- 你想知道吗？
Maybe it’s Marilyn Monroe!
或者她是玛丽·莲梦露
You’re drunk
你醉了
Blind,stinking drunk at 8:30 in the morning!
满口胡言乱语 现在才早上8:30啊
I’ll get six lawyers,I’ll bribe judges,but no divorce!
我会请6个律师 我会去贿赂法官 我什么都会做就是不离婚
Listen to me. Helen does not want a divorce!
听我说 听着 海伦不是要跟你离婚
All she wants is Ricky’s paddle!
她只是要瑞奇的桨
– Ricky’s paddle? – The other kids are out on the lake.
– 瑞奇的桨 – 到湖边玩的孩子都拿着 自己的桨划独木舟
But Ricky has to stay on the dock. You wouldn’t send his paddle!
可怜的瑞奇却要坐在码头 虽然他有独木舟但你没把桨寄给他
So she want you get paddle
所以她要你来拿她的桨
If anybody is gonna take Ricky’s paddle back…
听着 如果要找人拿桨给瑞奇
…I’m gonna take it back.
我是唯一的人选
And I’ve got a good mind to punch you.
– 还有 我很想打扁你的鼻
– Why? – Because you’re a love you.
– 为什么？- 因为你是个帅哥
Strutting around in your vest with that I’m-so-handsome look.
虎视眈眈地暗道 我是帅哥 你挡不了
– Let me tell you,Helen loves me. – Sure,she loves you!
– 我告诉你 海伦爱我 – 她当然爱你啦
She loves me because I’m sweet and gentle and worried…
知道她为什么爱我？因为我温和 仁慈 谨慎
…and nervous and shy and tender!
紧张 害羞 温柔
Breakfast is ready.
早餐做好了
– Anybody you know? – Meet Tom MacKenzie.
– 你认识他吗？他是汤姆·麦肯齐 我的好朋友
– How do you do? – He came for Ricky’s paddle.
– 汤姆·麦肯齐 你好吗？- 他来拿瑞奇的桨 瑞奇想要桨
– I’m taking it to him. – Is this a good time to pick up the–?
– 我要拿桨给他 – 我可以来拿地毯了吗？
– I wish I was dead. – Wait a minute,Kruhulik.
– 我的天啊 – 等等 克拉哈利先生 回来
If you wanna pick up something,pick up this.
如果你是来拿东西的话 把他带走吧
Ok,Mr. Sherman.What do you want me to do with him?
好 舍曼先生 你要我怎样处理他？
I don’t care. Put him in mothballs.do anything you like.
怎样也没关系 喂他吃樟脑丸 你可为所欲为
Just get him out of here.
只管拖他走
Boy,I’m telling you,lug the fat poodle…
天啊 告诉你 首先是那大块头
…lug the tomato plant,now lug this.
昨夜又搬了那棵蕃茄 现在还要拖他出去
I’ll be glad when the wives get home and things settle down.
我会很高兴见到太太们回家时 一切安然无事
The 8:47,I can still make the 8:47.
8:47分 我还赶得上8:47分的火车
I can’t stay for breakfast,I’m sorry.
我没法留下来吃早餐了 对不起
Don’t ever be sorry.
永远不要说对不起
Do me a favor. Call Brady & Company.
听着 帮我一个忙 打电♥话♥到布兰迪公♥司♥ 是出版社
Tell Mr. Brady I’m taking two weeks off,whether he likes it or not.
告诉布兰迪无论如何 我都要休息两个星期
tell him,I’m going to the Manhattan
告诉他我要去放松一下
Why don’t you stay here? You’ve got your own duplex.
你可以住下来啊 一切都是你的 两层楼都是你的
Big,tall martinis,air conditioning.anything you want.
大大杯马丁尼 冷气 你想做什么都可以
– Thank you. – Well,I guess that’s all.
– 谢谢 – 就这样了
– Just one more thing. – What?
– 还有一件事 – 什么事
I have a message for your wife.
我有个口信给你太太
Don’t wipe it off.
别擦掉
If she thinks it’s cranberries…
如果她觉得那是红莓汁
…tell her she’s got cherry pits in her head.
告诉她 她真是太傻了
Wait!
等等
Hey!
等等