假结婚（2009）

我们到了 到家了
Here we are. We’re home.
那是你家
That is your home?
你们是些什么人
Who are you people?
为什么你说 你很穷
Why did you tell me you were poor?
-我从来没说我很穷 -可你也没说你有钱
– I never said I was poor. – But you never told me you were rich.
我没有 我父母才有钱
I’m not rich. My parents are rich.
知道吗 有钱人都这么说
Ok, you know what? That’s something only rich people say.
安卓 欢迎回来
Hey, Andrew! Welcome home!
妈 怎么回事
Hi! Mom, what is this?
没什么 只是给你办个小型欢迎会
Nothing. it’s just a little welcoming party.
这不算犯法吧
Is that a crime?
也就请了50个亲密的朋友和邻居
Just 50 of our closest friends and neighbors.
他们都很期待见到你
And all excited to meet you.
-好 好 -来吧 快点
– Oh, good. good. – Come on. come on.
-聚会 -是的 我猜是的
– A party? – Yeah, I guess so.
快点 走吧 我奶奶走得都比你快
Come on, let’s go. My grandma’s moving faster than you.
你得加把劲儿了
Put your back into it.
很高兴见到你 马格瑞特 欢迎来斯塔卡
So nice to meet you, Margaret. welcome to Sitka.
吉尔 很高兴见到你 我的荣幸
Jill? Hi, nice to meet you. My pleasure.
为什么不告诉我 你是阿♥拉♥斯加肯尼迪家族的人
Why didn’t you tell me you were some kind of alaskan kennedy?
让我怎么说
How could I?
我们过去的三年里能说的只有你
We were in the middle of talking about you for the last three years.
知道吗 没时间了
Ok, know what? Timeout, ok?
我们不要再争论了
This bickering bickerson thing has got to stop.
得让人们相信我们在恋爱 我们就
People need to think that we are in love. so let’s just…
没问题 我可以
That, that’s no problem. I can do that.
我可以假装是坠入爱河的未婚夫 很简单
I can pretend to be the doting fiance? That’s easy.
反而是你
But for you, it’s going to require
就跟不让小孩儿吃零食一样 要了亲命了
That you stop snacking on children while they dream.
真好笑 你打算什时候宣布我们订婚的事
Very funny. when are you going to tell them we’re engaged?
我会选个最佳时机
I’ll pick the right moment.
安卓 你好
Hey, Andrew. hi!
麦克崔格太太 你好吗 很高兴见到你
Mrs. Mckittrick. How are you? Nice to see you.
很高兴见到你 麦克崔格太太 这位是马格瑞特
Nice to see you, Mr. Mckittrick. This is Margaret.
-你好 很高兴见到你 -马格瑞特
– Hi. pleasure. – Margaret!
你好 很高兴见到你
Hi, how are you? pleasure.
我一直想知道 图书编辑都做什么
So I always wanted to know, what does a book editor do?
路易斯 这问题真棒
That’s a great question, Louise.
我也很好奇 想知道答案
I’m curious to know the answer myself.
-你好 爸爸 -儿子
– Hello, dad. – Son.
这位一定是麦琪
This must be Maggie.
是马格瑞特
Uh, Margaret.
-我叫joe 很高兴见到你 -我也是
– Joe. pleasure to meet you. – pleasure’s mine.
你为什么不告诉我们 图书编辑都做什么
So why don’t you tell us exactly what a book editor does.
除了带作者出去吃吃饭 被读者抨击之外
Besides taking writers out to lunch and getting bombed.
听起来真好笑
Now that sounds like fun.
难怪你想当编辑
No wonder you like being an editor.
不对 路易斯 安卓不是编辑 他只是助理
No, Louise, Andrew’s not an editor, he’s an editor’s assistant.
麦琪才是编辑
Maggie here is the editor.
是马格瑞特
Margaret.
-你真的是 -安卓的老板了
– So you’re actually… – Andrew’s boss. yeah.
怎么样
Well. how about that.
我去加点酒
I think I’ll get a refill.
好一个老帅哥
Charming.
你给人的第一印象真是好极了 爸爸
That’s a hell of a first impression, dad.
怎么了 安卓
What the hell, Andrew?
离开这么久 你带回一个你讨厌的女人
You show up here after all this time with this woman you hated
-而她是你的女朋友 -我们刚到家
– And now she’s your girlfriend? – We just got here.
我们就不能再等几秒钟
Can we wait two seconds
再互相攻击吗
Before we throw the kitchen sink at each other?
没想到你是靠睡上司才能往上爬
Just never figured you for a guy who slept his way to the middle.
事实上 我要让你知道 这个女人
Actually, I’ll have you know that that woman in there
是镇上最值得尊敬的编辑之一
Is one of the most respected editors in town.
她是你的饭票了吧
She’s your meal ticket,
所以你带她回来见你母亲
And you brought her home to meet your mother.
她不是我的饭票 爸爸 她是我的未婚妻
Ssshe’s not my meal ticket, dad. she’s my fiance.
-你说什么 -你听见了
– What’d you say? – You heard me.
我要结婚了
I’m getting married.
-你好吗 -很好 很好 谢谢
– How are you? – Good, good. Thank you.
要不要点开胃菜
Would you care for some hors d’oeuvres?
不用 非常感谢
No, I’m fine. thank you very much.
是这儿的传统菜
It’s a tradition.
是口感问题 我不喜欢海鲜
It’s the texture. I’m not a fish person.
-你会喜欢的 -你真体贴
– You’ll like it. – You’re very sweet.
你尝尝吧
I think if you’ll just taste it.
太感谢你了
Thank you so much.
女士们 先生们
Ladies and gentlemen…
我有件很重要的事宣布
I have a very important announcement to make.
我和马格瑞特要结婚了
Margaret and I are getting married.
这是红辣椒
It’s the paprika.
真对不起
So sorry.
没事 这衣服是免熨的
That’s ok. it’s wash-and-wear.
亲爱的 你在哪
Yep, honey? Where you at?
这儿呢
Here it is.
到这儿来 小妞
Come on down here, pumpkin.
-好 -好
– All right. – Ok.
看看她 看看她
Oh, look at her, look at her.
女士们 先生们 她来了
Right there, ladies and gentlemen, there she is.
恭喜你 安卓
Congratulations, Andrew.
谢谢
Thank you.
非常感谢
Thank you very much.
-我们要庆祝下 -去拿香槟
– Time to celebrate. – get the champagne.
这就是你认为的
So that was your idea of the perfect time
宣布我们订婚的最佳时机
To tell them we’re engaged?
这时机再好不过了
’cause it was brilliant, brilliant timing.
安卓
Andrew. hi.
格特 天
Gert? oh, my god. hey, hi. wow.
你好吗 没想到你也会来
How you doing? I didn’t know that you were gonna be here.
你妈妈也许想给你个惊喜 惊喜吧
Your mom probably wanted it to be a surprise. So… surprise.
-是的 -那
– Right. – and…
我们太没礼貌了
…we’re being completely rude. hi.
-天 这位是我的前 -你好 我是格图德
– oh, god. this is my ex… – hi. I’m Gertrude.
就叫我格特
You can call me Gert.
恭喜你们了
Well, congratulations, you guys.
-谢谢 -谢谢
– Thank you. – Thank you.
是不是我错过了什么故事啊
So did I miss the story?
-什么故事 -什么故事
– What story? – What story?
你怎么求婚的故事
About how you proposed.
一个男人怎么求婚 能看出他的性格
Oh! how a man proposes says a lot about his character.
-是的 -是的
– Yes. – Yes, it does.
我真的很想听 安卓
I actually would love to hear the story, Andrew.
和我们说说吧
Would you tell us?
-是啊 -是啊
– Yeah. – Yeah.
知道吗
You know what?
事实上 马格瑞特更愿意说
Actually, Margaret loves telling this story…
所以让她来告诉大家
So I’m just gonna let her go ahead and do that.
我们就坐着认真听吧
’cause I think we should just sit in rapture.
好
Huh! wow, ok.
要从哪开始呢
Wow, where to begin… this story.
我和安卓
Ok, well, um, Andrew and I…
我和安卓正要庆祝
Andrew and I were about to celebrate
我们认识的周年纪念日
Our first anniversary together.
我知道他很想让我嫁给他
And I knew that he’d been itching to ask me to marry him.
可是他很害怕 就像一只小小鸟一样
And he was scared, like a little tiny bird.
于是我就不断地给他暗示
So I started leaving him little hints here and there…
因为我知道他没有勇气说出口 但
…because I knew he wouldn’t have the guts to ask, but…
实际情况不是那样
That’s not exactly how it happened.
-不是吗 -不是 不是
– No? hmm. – No. no.
她的暗示我都明白
I mean, I picked up on all her little hints.
她的情感一触即发 敏感极了
This woman’s about as subtle as a gun.