福尔摩斯秘史

You don’t know? Because Tchaikovsky…
我该怎么说才好 女人不是他的那杯茶
How shall I put it? Women not his glass of tea.
真可惜
Pity that.
夫人对她的最终选择非常满意
Madame is very happy with her final choice.
夫人可不能太草率 别忘了我是个英国男人
Madame must not be too hasty. She must remember that I am an Englishman.
那又怎样
So?
你知道别人是怎么评论我们的
You know what they say about us.
如果有什么比我们做菜更差劲
If there’s one thing more deplorable than our cooking,
那就是我们做♥爱♥
it’s our love making.
我们不是一个浪漫的民族
We are not the most romantic of people.
好极了 我们可不想要感情用事的傻子
Perfect. We don’t want sentimental idiots,
动不动就坠入爱河闹自杀
falling in love, committing suicide.
在威尼斯和夫人呆一周 她带着小宝宝回圣彼得堡
One week in Venice with Madame, she goes back to St. Petersburg with baby,
你带着小提琴回伦敦
you go back to London with fiddle.
很合理的安排
An equitable arrangement.
关于我的病史
About my medical history.
你问我的时候 我忽略了一个细节
When you asked me, I neglected to mention one small detail.
我的家族有血友病
There is hemophilia in my family.
我们容易流血不止
We’re all bleeders.
夫人说不用担心 她不会抓伤你的
Madame says not to worry, she will not scratch.
这我就放心了 不过…
That’s reassuring to know, but…
夫人说你话太多了
Madame says, “You talk too much.”
你觉得她迷人吗
You find her attractive or no?
我…
Well, I…
打扰一下 prokyzhynik是什么意思
Excuse me. What does prokaznik mean?
意思是 “你这个小坏蛋”
It means, “You little devil.”
真的 谢了
It does? Yeah? Thank you.
我重复一下问题
I repeat question.
你觉得夫人迷人不迷人
You find Madame attractive or no?
我认为她很迷人
I find her most attractive.
一位迷人的女士
For a woman, that is.
那没问题了
Then no problem!
有点小问题
Maybe a slight one.
你看 我并非自♥由♥身
You see, I am not a free man
不是自♥由♥身 但你是个单身汉
Not free? But you are bachelor?
一个和另一个单身汉住在一起到现在五年了的单身汉
A bachelor living with another bachelor for the last five years.
无比快活的五年
Five very happy years.
你到底想说什么
What is it you’re trying to tell us?
我真不想谈这个
Well, I hoped I could avoid the subject,
我们中有的人 因为造物主残酷的异想天开…
but some of us, through a cruel caprice of Mother Nature…
别绕弯子
Get to point.
就是说 柴可夫斯基的事并非个案
The point is that Tchaikovsky is not an isolated case.
你是说你和华生医生
You mean you and Dr. Watson?
他…是你的那杯茶
He is your glass of tea?
这是比较形象的说法
If you want to be picturesque about it.
相信我 夫人 是我无福消受美人恩
Believe me, Madame, the loss is all mine.
不过我情愿现在让您失望
But I would rather disappoint you now
总好过在威尼斯的小船上让您失望
than disappoint you in a gondola in Venice.
那才真是灾难
It would have been catastrophe.
华生 华生 你来不来
Watson. Watson, are you coming?
-怎么啦 老小子 -我们回家吧
-What is it, old boy? -We’re going home.
回家 没门
Home? Not a chance.
连一丁丁 一点点都没有 再见
Not the slightest, not the remotest chance. Toodle-oo.
等等
Hold on.
这…等一下
This is… Just one moment.
发生什么事了
What’s going on?
姑娘们都怎么了
What happened to the girls?
怎么 你不喜欢这样吗
Why? Do you not prefer it this way?
什么样
What way?
您不用装了
You don’t have to pretend.
福尔摩斯先生把你和他的关系都告诉我们了
Mr. Holmes told us everything about you and him.
我和他的关系
About me and him?
不用不好意思 我们不搞中产阶级那一套
Come now, no need to be bashful. We are not bourgeois.
医生和侦探之间可能是不太寻常
Maybe between doctors and detectives is unusual,
不过在芭蕾界 这是家常便饭
but in ballet, is very usual.
你在说什么
What is?
造物主的异想天开
Caprice of Mother Nature.
你看国荣 康永 耀明
Look at Pavel, Mischa, Boris,
力宏和一峰和晓明
Dimitry and Illya and Sergei.
晓明…一半一半
Sergei… Half and half.
福尔摩斯
Holmes!
福尔摩斯
Holmes!
你在这里
There you are!
你个混♥蛋♥
You wretch!
你个无赖
You rotter!
恶意编造这些个说不出口的东西
You blackguard of all the vile, unspeakable fabrications!
你有什么要解释的
What do you have to say for yourself?
别干坐在那里 说话
Well, don’t just sit there! Speak up, man!
福尔摩斯
Holmes?
你没事吧 福尔摩斯
Are you all right, Holmes?
福尔摩斯
Holmes?
从你的脚步声
From the sound of your footsteps,
我推断你心情欠佳
I gathered that you were not in a particularly amiable mood.
你怎么 怎么能编造出这么卑劣的谎言呢
How? How could you invent such a dastardly lie?
你到底在想些什么
What the deuce were you thinking of?
华生我真的非常非常抱歉
Watson, you have my most abject apologies.
可是你有没有被哪个疯婆子惦记过
But have you ever been cornered by a madwoman?
这好像是唯一可以摆脱她又不伤害她感情的办法
It seemed like the only way to get out of it without hurting her feelings.
那我的感情呢
And what about my feelings?
还有我的名誉
And my reputation?
你知不知道你干的这事儿有多严重
Do you realize the gravity of what you’ve done?
可能有什么后果
The possible repercussions?
会有点关于你的小八卦 不过是在圣彼得堡
So there’ll be a bit of gossip about you in St. Petersburg.
这种事传得比野火还快
These things spread like wildfire.
我都能听到我背后那些恶毒的窃窃私语
I can just hear those malicious whispers behind my back.
我再也没脸见人了
I’ll never be able to show my face in polite society.
要是我回部队去会怎么样
And what if it ever got back to my old regiment?
你根本不了解诺森伯兰郡第五枪手团
You don’t know the Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers!
他们会把我除名
They’ll strike me off the rolls.
他们会砍掉我的抚恤金
They’ll cut off my pension!
华生你疯啦
Watson, you’re running amok!
颜面扫地 身败名裂 为社交界所不容
Dishonored, disgraced, ostracized!
我该怎么办
What am I to do?
要是我的话 我会先把那朵花摘下来
Well, for one thing, I’d get rid of that flower.
你觉得很好玩是吧 我们俩可是在一条船上
You may think this is funny, but we’re both in the same boat.
我们得采取些非常手段
We must take desperate measures.
我们一定要阻止这些流言
We must stop this talk!
也许我们可以结婚
Maybe if we got married.
那就不止是流言了
Then they’d really talk!
显然 我们决不能再住在同一个屋檐底下了
Obviously, we cannot continue to live under the same roof.
我们必须分居
We must move apart.
当然 我们还是可以暗中相会
Of course, we can still see each other clandestinely,
在海德公园里僻静处的长椅上
on remote benches in Hyde Park
或者郊区火车站的候车室
and in the waiting rooms of suburban railway stations.
这整件事太荒谬了
This whole thing is ridiculous.
我们没什么好躲躲藏藏的
We have nothing to hide.
我就是这么跟你说的嘛
That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you.
要有人说闲话 哪怕一个字
Let somebody start a rumor, just one ugly word.
我们就告他诽谤
We’ll sue them for slander.
没人敢
No one would dare.
不过话说回来 你的风流史可真是让人称羡
After all, you have an enviable record with the fair sex.
妈的没错 我可以从三个洲找女人来给我作证
Damn right. I can get women from three continents to testify for me,
你也可以找女人来为你担♥保♥ 是吧 福尔摩斯
and you can get women to vouch for you too, can’t you, Holmes?
你可以吗 福尔摩斯
Can you, Holmes?
晚安 华生
Good night, Watson.
福尔摩斯
Holmes?
我来问你个问题 可能我有点冒昧
Let me ask you a question. I hope I’m not being presumptuous.
不过你生活中有过女人吗
But there have been women in your life?
答案是有过
The answer is yes.
你是有点冒昧
You’re being presumptuous.
晚安