有答案的男子（2021）

Of course.
你叫什么
What is your name?
我叫马蒂亚斯
My name is Mathias.
你呢 -维克托拉斯
Yours? -Victoras.
嗯
Hmm?
怎么样
How is that?
你看看我开的方向对吗
You want to check if I’m driving to the right direction?
世上本无路~
There is no right direction.
只是
Just…
我们可以不走高速公路吗
Can we please not take the autostrada?
为什么
Why?
很无聊 没什么可看的
It’s boring. There’s nothing to see there.
我知道风景美丽的省道
I know beautiful provincial roads.
这是什么 -不不不 这不是音乐
What’s this? -No, no, no. It’s not music.
（德语）你好 我叫乌苏拉 乌苏拉·汉特曼
Hello, my name is Ursula. Ursula Handtmann.
我今年二十六岁
I’m twenty-six years old.
“你好 我叫乌苏拉”
“Hello, my name is Ursula.”
乌苏拉·汉特曼 -“乌苏拉·汉特曼”
Ursula Handtmann. -“Ursula Handtmann.”
我今年二十六岁
I’m twenty-six years old.
我住在慕尼黑 巴伐利亚是
I live in Munich. Bavaria is…
我可以教你一些德语
I can teach you some German.
（德语）你饿了吗
Are you hungry?
你有钱吗
You have money?
你点餐时的纠结 让我看出很多东西来
You can tell so much by how long it takes someone to order.
还有纠结完选择吃什么
And by what he’s having.
主要是最后吃什么这一点
Mainly by what he’s having.
那你说说我要吃啥 -这很好猜
What am I having? -That’s easy.
总会三明治
A club sandwich.
总会三明治不会出错的 对吧
You can’t go wrong with a club sandwich, right?
而且我相信你永远不会
And I’m sure you never get
用泡菜或芥末来调味
pickles or mustard to the side to spice things up.
（德语） 你是个快餐小子 -什么
You’re a fast-food kid. -What?
你不吃泡菜 是吗
You don’t eat pickles, do you?
泡菜 我有时候吃
Pickles?I eat. Sometimes.
（意大利语）早上好 -早上好
Good morning. -Good morning.
你们想吃什么
What can I bring you?
我帮你选
I’ll choose for you.
给我 12 号♥ -12号♥
Number 12 for me. -Number 12.
54号♥给我的朋友 -五十四号♥
And 54 for my friend. -Fifty-four.
谢谢 -不客气
Thank you. -You’re welcome.
你点了什么 我很饿
What did you order? I’m very hungry.
生气 -饿
Angry? -Hungry.
不好意思 再来一个泡菜碟
Sorry… And a saucer with pickles, please.
好的 -谢谢
Of course. -Thanks.
你点了什么
What did you order?
我不知道 我只是随便说了个数
I don’t know, I just said random numbers.
告诉我 你说了啥数字
Tell me, what numbers did you order?
别呀 不要破坏惊喜 -告诉我几号♥
Come on, don’t spoil the surprise. -Tell me the numbers.
如果你不喜欢它 我帮你付
If you don’t like it, I’ll pay.
你知道不 在这里你可偷不走食物
You know, you can’t steal food from here.
我只从贵得离谱的地方偷食物
I only steal food from places that are irrationally expensive.
噢
Oh.
一个糟糕的三明治要五欧元 而且还尝起来像狗屎
Five euros for an awful sandwich and it tasted like shit.
在这种情况下 谁才是真正的小偷呢
So in this case, who is really the thief?
你呀
You.
你旅行的原因是什么
So what’s the reason for your trip?
没理由
No reason.
我就兜个风
I’m going for a ride.
你这整个旅程只是为了兜兜风吗
You are doing this entire trip just for a ride?
不是吧
No way.
那你为什么要开车而不是坐飞机
Why are you going by car and not by plane?
那你为什么不坐飞机去
Why aren’t you going by plane?
因为我也要兜风
I’m going for a ride.
我有点闲钱
I got money in my pocket
先去享受享受 一个月后工作就开始了
and a month to spend before work starts.
什么工作
What work?
我在巴伐利亚阿尔卑斯山教滑雪板和滑雪
I’m teaching snowboard and ski at the Bavarian Alps.
很有趣
It’s fun.
第 12 号♥
Number 12.
谢谢
Thank you.
54 号♥
Number 54.
你付钱
You pay.
祝您用餐愉快
Have a nice meal.
谢谢
Thank you.
来点儿泡菜
Pickles?
下个路口出去 我们下高速
Take the next exit and get off the autostrada.
不 我不想下高速
No, I don’t want to get off the autostrada.
我们浪费很多时间了 -怎么了
We’ve lost a lot of time. -Why?
有人在等你吗
Is someone waiting for you?
既然这是旅行
Since we’re doing this trip,
我不明白你为什么不想享受它
I don’t understand why you don’t want to enjoy it.
也许是因为我处于危险之中
Maybe I’m in danger.
你处于危险 -对啊
You’re in danger? -Yeah.
以你开车的方式来说 危险的是我吧
The way you drive, if someone is in danger, it’s me.
我的车里坐着一个陌生人
I have put a stranger in my car.
我怎么知道你不是连环杀手
How do I know you’re not a serial killer?
我怎么知道你不会把我切成碎片
How do I know you’re not going to cut me into pieces?
也许这就是你坚持要下高速的原因
Maybe that’s why you insist to get off the autostrada.
我看不出来把你切成碎片有什么必要
I don’t see any reason to cut you into pieces.
如果我只是单单杀了你呢
What if I just killed you?
让我们暂时先开开省道吧
Let’s try the provincial road for a while.
如果你不喜欢我的路线 我们再开高速公路
If you don’t like my route, we will go back to the autostrada.
开呗
Let’s go.
我非常了解这些路线
I know these routes very well.
相信我
Trust me.
我们来玩个游戏吧
Let’s play a game.
游戏20题你知道吗
You know the game 20 questions?
不知道
No.
什么 每个人都知道
What? Everybody knows it.
嗯 你在脑海里想象出一个东西
Well, you put something in your mind
然后我问20个问题来猜它
and I have 20 questions to guess what it is.
我会问你问题 你回答是或否
I’ll ask you questions, and you answer with a yes or a no.
这样我就能了解你了
How will I learn things about you?
你可以通过一个人的问题更好地了解一个人
You can better judge a man by his questions
而不是通过他的回答
than by his answers.
你从哪里知道这些的
Where do you read all this?
哦 我一直在想是谁会去买♥♥那些愚蠢的书
Oh! I was always wondering who buys all those stupid books.
如果你愿意 你可以先开始问你的问题
You can start your questions if you want.
问吧
Go ahead.
好吧 那我先要开始 -好的
OK, I’ll start. -OK.
第一个问题
First question.
你一直都在希腊生活吗
Have you lived your whole life in Greece?
说呀 -是的
Come on. -Yes.
第二个问题 你有工作吗
Second question. Do you have a job?
没有
No.
你学过什么吗
Did you study anything?
我 开始学过农业
I… started studying agriculture…
农业 我想象不出来
Agriculture? I could never imagine that.
但是我并没有学完
But I didn’t really finish that.
我需要小便
I need to pee.
什么 在这里吗
What, here?
不是这里 继续沿着那条路行驶
Not here. Keep driving down that road.
为什么 为什么要走那条路
Why? Why drive down that road?
把你切成碎片的时候到了
The time has come to cut you into pieces.
我先下去了 – 等等 等等 等等
It’s fine. -Wait, wait, wait.
等等
Wait!
因为你正在学习农业或其他什么
Since you’re studying agriculture or whatever,
你可以用你的知识想想附近这些树的学名
you can name all these trees here with their scientific names
在我小便的时候
while I’m peeing.
你说你想小便
You said you wanted to pee.
我是啊