情人（1992）

他就那样把她一♥丝♥不♥挂♥得抱上了床
and he carried her like that naked, to the bed.
可是一上♥床♥
Once on the bed…
一阵恐惧就向他袭来
fear overcomes him.
我办不到
I can’t.
他说这不是真爱
He says it’s not true…
她太小了
that she’s too little…
他不能这么做
that he can’t do such a thing.
所以
So…
她主动了
So she’s the one who does it.
她紧闭双眼
Her eyes closed…
褪去他的衣裳
she undresses him…
解开一粒一粒扣子
button by button…
褪去两袖
sleeve by sleeve.
她抚摸着他的肌肤
The skin.
抚摸着那肌肤
The skin.
那肌肤光滑无比
The skin is of a sumptuous softness.
细嫩通透
The body is hairless…
没有任何男性的野性
without any virility at all other than that of the sex.
她没有直视他
She doesn’t look him in the face.
她不停地抚摸他
She touches him.
她触摸着异性柔嫩的肌肤
She touches the softness of the sex of the skin.
她抚摸着那未知领域的新奇玩意
She caresses the golden hue the unknown novelty.
我还能想象到那地方的杂乱无章
I still see the place of distress shipwrecked…
污秽的墙壁
the distempered walls…
百叶窗围起来的火炉
the slatted shutters giving up to the furnace.
沸腾的热血
the soiling of the blood.
我记得相当清晰
I remember well.
房♥子里一片漆黑
The room is dark.
被永远不会停息的城镇的喧嚣
It’s surrounded by the never-ending clamor of the town…
又随着人流在这镇子里消逝
carried away by the town by the flow of the town.
我的身体就这样暴露在市井喧闹中
My body was in that public noise…
被来来往往的嘈杂一览无遗
this passing by from the outside exposed.
大海 我想着
The sea, I thought…
浩瀚无比
the immensity.
你在想什么呢？
What are you thinking about?
植物都死了
They’re dead.
弄疼你了吗？
Did it hurt you?
没有
No.
你伤心吗？
Are you sad?
是的
Yes, I guess.
有点吧
A little.
我也不知道
I don’t know.
是因为我们在白天做♥爱♥
It’s because we’ve made love during the daytime…
在这死寂的热浪中
in the dead of the heat.
不是
No.
是我自己
It’s me.
我总会有点伤感
I’m always a little sad.
像我妈一样
I’m like my mother.
当我告诉她我想当一个作家时
When I told her I’d be a writer…
她耸了耸肩
she shrugged.
她说那不是工作
She said it’s not work…
这个想法太幼稚
it’s a childish idea.
她想让我学数学 像她一样
She wants me to do maths, my mother does…
赚钱
to earn money.
你想写什么？
What do you want to write?
书
Books.
小说
Novels…
写我哥哥
about my elder brother…
写我怎么杀了他
to kill him…
让他置身于痛苦中
to see him in pain…
让他去死
to make him die.
写我弟弟 写如何去拯救他
About my younger brother to save him.
写这些
And about that…
还有我母亲的悲伤
about my mother’s sadness.
缺钱 羞辱
About the lack of money, about shame.
我知道你母亲的不幸
I know the bad luck with your mother…
和她的悲惨生活
and the tragedies she’s lived.
你怎么知道？
How do you know?
通过下人
Through the servants.
我的司机
Through my driver.
通过下人什么都能知道
You know everything through the servants.
我也知道你哥哥
I know about your elder brother, too.
我在河边的鸦♥片♥馆见过他
I met him in the opium dens along the riverside.
他抽得太多了
He smokes too much.
太多太多了
Much too much.
白人不懂怎么去抽
The whites don’t know how to smoke.
他就是个禽兽
He’s an animal.
他让我害怕
He scares me.
他为了抽鸦♥片♥偷我妈妈钱
He steals from my mother to go smoke.
他还偷下人的钱
He steals from the servants.
我妈妈从来不说他
My mother never says anything.
她最喜欢他
He’s her favorite.
父亲死了以后 家里就没钱了
Since my father died, there’s no money in the house.
我母亲失去了一切
My mother lost everything here.
她做了错误的选择
She made all the wrong choices.
那你们怎么过活的？
So how do you manage?
我们竭尽所能
We do the best we can.
不知羞耻地
We’re shameless.
竭尽所能
We do the best we can.
你来这是因为我有钱吗？
Did you come here because I’ve got money?
我不知道
I don’t know.
我来因为我喜欢你
I came because I liked you.
如果我穷你会喜欢我吗？
Would you like me if I were poor?
我就喜欢这样的你
I like you the way you are…
有钱的你
with your money.
我想带你走
I want to take you away.
我想带你远走高飞
I’d like to take you away…
和你离开这里
leave with you.
我还不能离开我妈妈
I can’t leave without my mother yet.
我太小了
I’m too little.
我不能离开我妈妈还有我弟弟
I can’t leave my mother nor my little brother.
现在还不能
Not yet.
我求他做了一次又一次
I had asked him to do it again and again.
对我做
To do it to me.
他做了又做
He had done it.
他热血沸腾得做着
He had done it in the unctuousness of blood.
我想他都习惯了
I think he’s used to it.
他就是这样活着的
This is what he does in life…
除了去爱 别无他求
Love. Nothing else.
我很有幸
I’m very lucky.
显然 就像这是他的职业一样
Obviously, it’s as if it were a profession he’d have.
他上着我
He’s on me…
他又一次沉浸其中
he engulfs himself again.
我们就这样躺在床上
We stay like that, nailed…
在城镇的嘈杂声中呻♥吟♥着
moaning in the clamor of the town.
知道吗
You see…
你这辈子都会记得今天下午
you’ll remember this afternoon all your life…
即使你忘记我的面孔
even if you’ve forgotten my face…
我的名字
my name:
你觉得我会记得这个房♥间吗？
Do you think I’ll remember the room?
好好看看
Take a good look at it.
没什么特别的
It’s like anywhere.
就是
That’s it.
就如往常一样
It’s like always.
我好奇我哪来的力量
I wonder how I found the strength…
如此平静得对待这禁忌只是
to go against the forbidden with this calm…
这种决心
this determination…
我如何成功地坚持了下来
how I succeeded in going all the way to the end of the idea.
我如何如此享受
How could I have taken so much pleasure…
和这个陌生男人单独在一起
for me alone with this unknown man?