住货车的女士（2015）

I’m not at liberty to speak.
我得联♥系♥我的新社工了
I think I may contact my new social worker.
为什么？你不是说自己不需要社工？
What for? You always say you don’t want the social worker.
我得到指引说她能帮忙
I’ve had guidance she might help.
我不想要一院子的破铜烂铁
I don’t want a used car lot.
玛丽说的
哪个玛丽？ – Mary says. – Mary who?
玛丽就是
Mary.
你家那位住货车的女士
Your Lady in the Van.
你不知道她叫玛丽吗？
Didn’t you know her name was Mary?
我知道，但我一直叫她谢帕德女士
Well, I suppose I did. I always call her Miss Shepherd.
每个人都有名字
We all have names.
也许你们互称对方名字
Perhaps if you called her by her name and she called you by yours,
“阿兰”，“玛丽”
“Alan”, “Mary”,
可能这样更容易沟通
you never know, it might be easier to talk things through.
沟通？不可能
Through? There is no through.
和一个只肯与圣母玛利亚交谈的人
How do you talk things through with someone
要怎么沟通？
who has conversations with the Virgin Mary?
跟以赛亚·柏林或许能沟通
You talk things through with Isaiah Berlin, maybe,
跟谢帕德女士比起来，他算话特别少的了
who, in comparison with Miss Shepherd, is a man of few words.
我和她没法沟通，因为沟通不下去
You do not talk things through with her because you don’t get through.
阿兰，我感觉你不太友好
Alan, I’m getting a bit of hostility here.
对你来说，这就是一条陡峭的学习曲线
I realise for you this may be a steep learning curve.
不，不是什么陡峭的学习曲线
No. It is not a steep learning curve.
我从没经历过所谓的学习曲线
I’ve never been on a so-called learning curve.
我和学习曲线毫无关系
I’m about as likely to be found on a learning curve
就跟我不可能在策马特山滑雪一样
as I am on the ski slopes at Zermatt.
另外，她不叫玛丽
And besides, her name isn’t Mary.
有些人认为她叫玛格丽特
Some people seem to think it’s Margaret.
她甚至不姓谢帕德
You know, it isn’t even Shepherd.
资料上写着她叫玛丽
Well, I have her down as Mary.
资料上可能还写着她是个理智的人呢
Yes, and you presumably have her down as a rational human being.
哈喽
Hello!
妈咪
Mummy!
老年人俱乐部
茶，咖啡，蛋糕 欢迎前来
半个小时后回来
Back in half an hour.
嘿，玛格丽特
Hello, Margaret.
万福玛利亚，你沐浴恩典，主与你同在
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.
妇女敬仰你赞美你，你为世人带来耶稣的祝福
Blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb.
干嘛呢？让开！
What are you doing there? Come on!
赛车手去哪儿了？
What’s happened to Stirling Moss?
最近没看到她开车
Haven’t seen her at the wheel recently.
我想她可能去法国南部度假了
Taking a well-earned break, I imagine. The Dordogne, possibly.
真的吗？
波琳 – Really? – Pauline.
她的车还在这儿
Her car’s back.
但我很久没看到她了，不知道她还好吗
But I haven’t seen her around for a bit. I wonder if she’s all right.
我在想
Am I right in thinking
她裙子后面那块污渍是不是因为失禁？
that large, many-contoured stain at the back of her frock denotes incontinence?
反正肯定不是什么时尚风格
I don’t think it’s a fashion statement.
亲爱的
Darling.
你一定希望她有一天能安详离开
What you must be hoping is that one of these days she’ll just slip away.
别傻了
Don’t you believe it.
戏里才会那么演，晚年都很难熬
That’s what happens in plays. In life, going downhill is an uphill job.
你母亲好吗？
How’s your mother?
老样子，能坐，能笑，能睡
Same. Sits. Smiles. Sleeps.
你还好吗？
Are you all right?
我？我很好，准备去剧院
Me? Yes, why? I’m just going to the theatre.
不会因为你的剧难过吧？
没有 – Not upset about your play? – No.
我那天看到一篇很好的剧评
I read a good review the other day.
我听说评价都很好
那是一定的 – I was told they were all good. – They are, I’m sure.
我们很喜欢
We enjoyed it.
我没想到你独挑大梁
Though I hadn’t realised it was just going to be you and nobody else.
是啊，独角戏嘛
Well, yes. It’s a monologue.
我想是的
Yes, I suppose.
我只是很惊讶你怎么能记住那么多词儿
I’m just amazed how you remember it all.
我读的剧评特别提到了你
The review I read was particularly perceptive about you.
是吗？说什么了？
Really? Saying what?
说你犹豫不决
That you couldn’t make your mind up.
关于什么？
所有事情 – About what? – Anything, really.
应该是好意
It meant in a good way!
谢谢
Thanks.
其实我根本没看懂他的剧想说什么
Actually, I couldn’t make it out at all. What was it about?
还是演他自己，一点不坦白
Him, as usual. Not coming clean.
什么事？
你觉得呢？ – What about? – What do you think?
我再次下楼时，她还坐在那里，穿着大衣戴着帽子
And when I came down again, she’s still sat there, hat and coat on.
她说：“格兰，我的人生目标就是让你开心”
She said, “Graham, my one aim in life is for you to be happy.”
准备执行45号♥
And execute 45.
“如果我的死能让你开心，我愿意”
“If I thought that by dying it would make you happy, I would.”
开始
Go.
我说：“妈妈”
I said, “Mam,
“你死了我不会开心，恰恰相反”
“your dying wouldn’t make me happy. In fact, the reverse.
“我会很不开心，妈妈，你不会死”
“It would make me unhappy. Anyway, Mam, you’re not going to die.”
她说：“不，我不会死”
She said, “No, I’m not going to die.
“我要结婚了，在特纳立夫岛度蜜月”
“I’m going to get married. The honeymoon is in Tenerife.
“吃片药吧”
“Have one of your tablets.”
在剧院再次讲了我母亲的故事后
So, for the umpteenth time, I biked back from the theatre
我骑自行车返回家中
where I’d been talking about my mother.
至少我知道母亲在哪
Well, at least I know where my mother is.
谢帕德女士
Miss Shepherd.
谢帕德女士？
Miss Shepherd?
我不喜欢这样
I don’t like it.
那就打开看呀
不行 – So, look in. – No.
你怕了？
没有 – Are you scared? – No.
不是怕尸体
Not of the body.
而是怕故事结束了，我就得把它写下来
Scared this may be the end of the story, and now I’m going to have to write it.
现在她走了
Still, now she’s gone.
我可以随心创作
I can make it up.
自♥由♥叙述，太好了
Narrative freedom. Whoopee.
谢帕德女士
Miss Shepherd.
谢帕德女士？
打开呀 – Miss Shepherd? – Go on.
你在干吗偷看我东西？
What are you doing? Looking at my things?
我以为你病了或者死了
I thought you might be ill or dead.
我死了？
我只是担心 – Dead? Me? – I was concerned.
好管闲事
You were nosy!
对不起，我没看见你
I haven’t seen you. I’m sorry.
我没死！我死了会告诉你
I’m not dead! You’ll know when I’m dead.
对不起
I’m sorry.
我死了？我才不会这么急着死
Dead? Me? I shan’t die in a hurry, I can tell you.
死？
Dead?
开什么玩笑
Don’t make me laugh.
她没死，我母亲也没死
She didn’t die then, and nor did my mother.
但许多年过去，她们日渐凋零
But as the years passed, both of them were beginning to fade.
你也知道，很难记录她的病历
As you can appreciate, it’s difficult to take a history.
但如果没猜错的话，她不抽烟？
But I’m right in thinking she hasn’t been a smoker?
不
不抽烟也不喝酒 – No. – Not been a smoker, doesn’t drink.
总而言之，她还算健康
All things considered, a very healthy woman.
是吗？
You think?
她摔断了髋骨
This is a woman who’s broken her hip.
当然，如果年纪轻些，情况好点
And of course, in someone younger and in better circumstances,
我们会给她开抗生素
we’d give them antibiotics.
但鉴于你母亲的年纪和精神状况
But at your mother’s age, and in her state of mind,
给她吃抗生素并不是好事
one wonders if this is altogether kind.
那如果不开抗生素会怎样？
And if you don’t give her antibiotics, what will happen?
她也许会康复
She may recover.
也许不会
Or not.
也许会一觉不醒
She could just sleep away.
你千万别自责
You mustn’t reproach yourself.
你已经
You’ve done
做得够多了
more than can be expected.
谢谢
Thank you.
巴尼特先生
Mr Bennett.
你去哪儿了？