住货车的女士（2015）

I’ve had bigger flowers than these.
还系着丝带
And with ribbons on.
这些花可比不了
These don’t compare.
音乐
Music.
人怎么能避开音乐？
How are people supposed to avoid it?
音乐从我指尖流出
You see, I had it at my fingertips.
又深入骨髓
I had it in my bones.
我在黑暗中也能弹琴
I could play in the dark.
有时不得不如此
Had to sometimes.
那些琴键
And the keys were
就像一间间房♥子
like rooms.
C大调和D小调
C major and D minor.
就像黑暗的房♥间和光明的房♥间
Dark rooms and light rooms.
音乐于我
Just like a mansion
就是高楼大厦
to me, music.
只是我很苦恼
Only it worried me,
弹钢琴远比祈祷来得容易
that playing came easier than praying.
我…
And I…
我说过这句话，也许不该说
I said this, which may have been an error.
对谁说过？
Said it to whom?
神父
My confessor.
他说
He said
那是魔鬼侵入的另一条道路
that was another vent the devil could creep through.
所以他禁止弹钢琴
So, he outlawed the piano.
也基本终结了音乐
Put paid to music generally.
他说随着精神的成长
Said dividends would accrue in terms of
会积累好的回报
growth of the spirit.
他们就是这样做的
Which they did.
他们做到了
They did.
你母亲好吗？
How’s your mother?
老样子
The same.
还在昏迷？
Still in the coma?
没有
No.
只是半眯着眼睛
She’s just getting a bit of shut-eye.
人老了都这样
People do.
晚安
Well, good night.
巴尼特先生
Mr Bennett?
握住我的手
Hold my hand.
干净的
It’s clean.
她一生中的很多故事，都是在她死后我才得知
So much of what this woman’s life had been, I found out only after her death.
所以我有时不得不虚构一下
So, to tell her story, I have occasionally had to invent,
讲述她的故事，有时我不得不这样
So, to tell her story, I have occasionally had to invent,
但大部分情节无法编造
though much of it one could not make up.
以下内容并非我编造：那天早上谈话过后
And I do not make it up when I say that it was on the morning after this talk,
她洗了头，躺在货车里
when she lay in the van with her hair washed,
也是那天早上，社工来到花♥园♥
that on that same morning comes the social worker into the garden,
带了些干净的衣服和药膏，敲了敲货车门
bearing clean clothes, linen and ointment and knocks on the door of the van.
那不再是一辆货车
It is a van no longer.
而是一座坟墓
It is a sepulchret.
可以借你的电♥话♥用一下吗？
Can I use your phone?
当然
Yes. Yes, of course.
即使在此时，我还是不敢踏进这座散发死亡气息的坟墓
Even now, I do not venture into this evil-smelling tomb.
发现她遗体的人不是我，这让我觉得受到了欺骗
But I feel cheated that the discovery of the body has not actually been mine
这么多年，看到了这么多事
and that having observed so much for so long,
我却不是第一个见证她死亡的人
I am not the first to witness her death.
很快
Now, in quick succession,
医生，神父，殡葬员都来了
the priest and men from the undertaker’s come the doctor,
二十多年来，他们做着别人不会做的事
all of whom do what no one else has done for 20 years.
换句话说，他们毫不犹豫
Namely, without pause
毫无不快地走进那辆货车
and seemingly without distaste, step inside the van.
愿主赐予她永恒的安息
Lord grant her everlasting rest
让永恒之光照耀她
and let perpetual light shine upon her.
引她面见至高者上帝
Present her to God the Most High.
她走了，那位女士
She’s gone, then, the lady.
他会知道的，她会告诉他的
He’ll know. She’ll have told him.
只是牧师们得保持沉默
Only they got to keep mum, vicars.
对警♥察♥的调查没什么帮助
No helping the police with their enquiries.
你知道她一直在逃吗？
Did you know she was on the run?
你说谢帕德女士？
Miss Shepherd?
是的，随便你怎么称呼她
Miss whatever you call her, yeah.
在路口停车时
Stationary at a junction,
一个骑摩托车的年轻人转弯时速度太快
a young lad on a motorbike comes ’round a corner too fast
撞上了她的车
and smashes into her vehicle.
不是她的责任
Not her fault.
只是他死在了路上，她就认为是自己杀了他
Only here’s a dead boy on the road who she thinks she’s killed.
她报♥警♥了吗？拦下别人的车了吗？没有
Does she call the police? Flag down a fellow motorist? No.
她逃离了现场
She clears off pronto.
因此触犯了法律
Thereby putting herself on the wrong side of the law.
所以你敲诈她
So, you blackmailed her.
我是警♥察♥，巴尼特先生
I’m a policeman, Mr Bennett.
虽然已经退休了，但不会去敲诈别人
Retired, of course. We don’t do things like that.
她以前那辆车上有个撞痕
Well, it’s a cut above her previous vehicle.
这么多年，她住在我家门口，游离于法律之外
All those years, stood on my doorstep, she was outside the law.
人生，这是我不停在想的事
A life, this is what I keep thinking,
没有她，我的人生了无生趣
a life beside which mine is just dull.
我在坟墓旁陷入了沉思，一名殡葬员引起了我的注意
Left to my own thoughts at the graveside, one of the undertaker’s men takes the eye.
我想殡葬不是什么让人趋之若鹜的职业
Not an occupation one drifts into, I imagine, undertaking.
巴尼特先生，不好意思
Mr Bennett. Excuse me.
我才应该是这里的焦点
I’m supposed to be the centrepiece here.
但是我忘了逝者知道一切
But I’m forgetting that the dead know everything.
你应该强忍♥住眼泪，而不是偷看年轻帅哥
You should be fighting back the tears, not eyeing up the talent.
这是个思路
Well, it’s a thought.
现在她死了
She’s dead now.
我想对她怎样都可以
I can do what I want with her.
你当然可以，我死了，你随意！
Yes, you can. I’m dead. Feel free!
哈罗
Hello.
现在有两个你，是因为你有双重人格吗？
There are two of you now. Is that because you’re in two minds?
是的
不是 – Yes. – No
谢帕德女士，你要去哪？
Where are you going, Miss Shepherd?
要是那辆货车成了朝圣之地，你们会不会反对？
I was wondering, would either of you object if the van became a place of pilgrimage?
不会
我要把车弄走 – No. – I’m getting rid of the van. The van is going.
可以在那进行治疗，收入归修女
Healing could take place, and any proceeds could go towards the nuns.
修女？修女为你做过什么？
The nuns? What did the nuns ever do for you?
没什么，只是捐款源源不断到来时
Well, not much, but when the donations start rolling in
她们会意识到我有多受欢迎
they’ll realise what a catch I would have been.
就跟圣女贝尔纳黛特一样
It was the same with Saint Bernadette.
她们发现时已经太晚了
They didn’t realise with her until it was too late.
这边，我想让你们见一个人
This way. There’s someone I want you to meet.
你可以写一写这件事
That’s something you could do.
写的时候可以夸张些
This thing you’re trying to write, well, you could pump it up a bit.
就像《圣贝尔纳黛特之歌♥》里面一样
If it were on the lines of The Song of Bernadette,
保管让你大赚一笔
it would make you a packet.
为什么？为什么让我就这么死了？
I mean, why? Why did you just let me die?
我还想上天堂
I’d like to go up into heaven.
想升♥天♥呢
An ascension, possibly.
一次升华
A transfiguration.
这种事我不太擅长
That’s not really my kind of thing.
到了
There you are.
这是我的新朋友
This is my new friend.
你好
你好 – Hello. – Hello.
这就是那个撞上我车子的年轻人
It’s the young man who crashed into the van.
嗨
Hi.
我以为是我杀了他
I thought it was me that killed him.
结果是他自己的责任
Turns out it was his own fault.
不管怎样，我俩还有很多要聊
So, one way and another, we’ve got heaps to talk about.
再见
Goodbye.
巴尼特先生
Mr Bennett?
我在
Yes.
我本打算在你家车道待三个月
I came into your drive for three months
结果一住就是15年！
and I stayed for 15 years!
巴尼特先生