史泰登岛国王（2020）

你要是有钱的话
If you have money,
干嘛还要住在史泰登岛呢
why would you ever live in Staten Island?
哦 耶 -太棒了
Oh, God. Yeah. – So good.
我们为我们的女儿乔安
We are so proud
感到非常骄傲
of our daughter Joanne…
还有克莱尔 这些年常常陪伴着我们家
and Claire, who’s been at our house so much over the years
你就像我们的第二个女儿
you feel like our second daughter.
玛姬 谢谢你这些年让女儿陪伴我们
Thank you, Margie, for lending her to us all these years.
你们是非常努力的人 我们也非常为你们骄傲
You guys have worked so hard, and we are so, so proud of you.
老天 您别装了 死基佬
Jesus Christ, dial it back, you fucking fruits.
乔安
Joanne,
你是我们最重要的女儿
you are a very special girl.
你让我们梦想成真
You made our dreams come true, too.
你是我们可爱的天使
You’re my sweet angel.
她可不是
No, she’s not.
能成为你的父母是我们的荣幸
It’s such an honor to be your parents.
你教给我们的和我们教给你的东西一样多 还有克莱尔
You’ve taught us as much as we’ve taught you. Claire…
你经历了太多
You’ve been through so much,
但却非常争气
and you’ve done so well,
换做我们也不可能做得这么好
so much better than any of us could have handled it.
你父亲斯坦一定也为你骄傲
Your dad Stan would be so proud of you.
他此刻就在天堂看着你
He’s looking down at you right now.
是的
Yes, he is.
他可没有
No, he’s not.
敬乔安和克莱尔
A toast to Joanne and Claire.
太骄傲了
So proud.
祝贺你们
Congratulations!
Please don’t
Make me have to take your bitch
How I roll, if I’m shining
Everybody gonna shine…
你好啊 托德 -你好 斯科特
What’s up, Todd? – What’s up, Scott?
你什么时候也要上大学吧
You going to college, too, someday?
是啊 我是想去 我想学法律
I’d like to, yeah. I’d go study law.
是吗 那挺不错的
Oh, yeah? That’s awesome, man.
听着真不错 你有大♥麻♥吗
That sounds really cool. Do you have any weed?
有啊 -我能来点儿吗
I do. – Could I have some?
当然 我去拿点儿 – 好啊 谢啦 托德
Definitely. I’ll go grab it. – Cool. Thanks, Todd.
小伙子还他妈不错 托德
Fucking home run, Todd.
一想起我妹妹可怜地
It makes me sad to think of my little sister
独自坐在家里等着儿子成才
sitting in that sad little house,
我就伤心
waiting for her son to be perfect.
我没有
I’m not.
那你可白瞎了这副好身材
Then you’re wasting all of this.
活活浪费了
All of it’s getting wasted.
你喝醉了 -你真是浪费了
You’re a mess. – You’re wasted.
妈妈可要 她可要对你失望了
Mom would be so disappoin… Mom would be disappointed in you.
你才是那个经常喝醉的人
You’re the one who’s always wasted.
你浪费了 就像剩饭一样
You’re wasting. It’s like leaving food on the table.
得了吧
Come on.
我带你出去玩 -与人交往太难了
Let me take you out. – It’s so hard to meet people.
我是真心地 -不 我是说 唉
I’m totally open. – No, it’s… I mean, God…
你一点也不真诚
You’re not open at all.
与人交往就是很难 -你撒谎
It’s really hard to meet people. – You’re a liar.
自欺欺人 什么叫与人交往很难
You’re not open. “Hard to meet people”?
我在急诊室工作 我看到的都是 -你一晚上
I’m in the E.R. All I see is, like… – You meet…
你一晚上能见到上百人 -中枪的人
You meet a hundred people a night. – People who were shot…
就是说啊 都中枪了
Yeah, they’re shot.
他们 他们 呃 他们是罪犯
They’re-they’re, uh, they’re criminals.
别总是自我束缚了 -我见谁啊我
Stop limiting yourself. – Who am I gonna meet?
别自我束缚好吗
Stop limiting yourself.
但我在医院上班 -是啊
But I’m at the hospital. – Yeah.
他们也不全是罪犯啊 – 你工作能遇见很多人
They’re not all criminals. – You meet people at work.
这就是为什么 -有些还是受害者呢
That’s what it’s… – Some of them are victims.
多尔
Doll…
我们可以给你一周安排两班
You know, we could put you on two shifts a week,
就 就只是试一试 -我不需要工作
just-just, just to try it. – I don’t need a job.
我跟文身店签了合同了
I, uh, I got a contact at a tattoo shop.
我 我准备去做学徒
I’m-I’m hoping for an apprenticeship, so…
那你肯定需要钱吧
Then you’re gonna need some money.
可不 有些人走的时候还给80块小费呢
Yeah, some of these guys walk away with 80 bucks in tips.
斯科特 你堂兄在给你安排工作 你就考虑一下吧 好吗
Scott, your cousin’s offering you a job. Consider it, okay?
要是你干的好 你还能当个侍应生
If you’re good at it, you can become a waiter.
说起来你为什么要给我安排工作
Why are you offering me a job anyway?
因为我跟你父亲保证我会照顾你
Because I told your father I’d always look out for you.
怎么可能 他死于一场突发火灾
How? He died suddenly in a fire.
你问的是他的魂儿吗
Uh, did you ask his ghost?
别耍这种小聪明 斯科特
That’s not witty, Scott.
我觉得你那黑色幽默一点也不好笑
Your dark sense of humor doesn’t work for me.
我觉着好笑
I find it funny.
今天是你妹妹重要的日子 有点礼貌
It’s your sister’s big day. Be a gentleman.
好吧 移♥民♥局突击检查拘了我们几个人
Okay, we lost a few guys in an ICE raid.
操蛋 抱歉
Ah, shit. Sorry.
也许你可以半工半读
Maybe you should work and go to college.
读大学可太扯淡了 -哦
College is bullshit! – Oh.
你知道谁读的哈佛大学吗 炸♥弹♥怪客
You know who went to Harvard? The Unabomber.
你知道谁读的天普大学吗 比尔 科斯比
You know who went to Temple? Bill Cosby.
你知道还有谁读的天普大学吗 泰德·邦迪
You know who else who went to Temple? Ted Bundy.
你知道还有谁读的霍夫斯特拉大学吗 伯尼·麦道夫
You know who went to Hofstra? Bernie Madoff.
你知道谁读的沃顿商学院吗 唐纳德·特朗普
You know who went to Wharton? Donald Trump.
大学就是个骗局
It’s all a scam.
好吧 那我也不该上大学
Okay, well, maybe I shouldn’t go, then.
哦不 你会度过人生中最好的时光的
Oh, no, you’ll have the time of your life.
克莱尔:嗨 斯科特
Hey, Scott.
坐吧
Sit down.
好
Okay.
我给你买♥♥了这个
I got you this.
这 这啥啊 这 这什么意思
So, what-what is, uh, what is, what is this?
就是画笔和一些颜料
It’s paintbrushes and some paint.
我知道你喜欢美术 所以我就想着 在我不在的时候
Well, I know you’re into art, so I thought you could
你可以用这些来开阔视野
expand your horizons while I’m gone.
你还专门要了礼物收据吗
You got a gift receipt for this?
你没事吧 -没事 嗯
You okay? – Fine… Yeah.
怎么了 没事啊
Wh-What do you mean? Yeah, I’m…
我不在家你没事的吧
You gonna be okay without me here?
什么意思 你觉得你走了我就活不了了吗
What, you don’t think I can survive here without you?
好吧 那你别老干混♥蛋♥事儿啊
Okay, just don’t be a dick, okay?
对妈妈好点儿 听到没 别老气她
Like, be nice to Mom, okay? Don’t give her a hard time.
让她歇会儿吧 -我怎么没让她歇着了
She deserves a break. – I always give her a-a break.
你什么意思 我 谁能让我歇会儿
What are you… When’s… When am I gonna get my break?
就
Like…
你说什么呢
What are you talking about?
每个人就知道关心你
All anyone ever does is worry about you.
我的童年没人理就是因为你
I was ignored my entire childhood ’cause of you.
哦 是吗 我还真不记得我的童年多美好了
Oh, yeah, I forgot that my childhood was so dandy.
你别疯疯癫癫一辈子
Okay, you don’t get to act crazy your whole life
就因为爸爸去世了 好吗
just ’cause Dad died, okay?
至少你还见过他
At least you got to know him.
告诉你 你没见过他才是幸运的
Well, you’re lucky you didn’t get to know him, okay?
因为这个你好歹像个正常人
‘Cause that’s why you’re almost normal.
如果你见过他 你就会知道
If you got to know him, you would’ve known that he was,
他他妈是最酷的人
like, the fucking coolest guy ever,
然后你这辈子就不会再好了
and that would’ve ruined the rest of your life.
但你还能怎样呢
Okay, like, but what are you gonna do?
你准备去找工作还是离开家
Are you gonna get a job or are you gonna leave the house?
不知道
I don’t know.
我 我想开家文身餐厅
I-I’m gonna open that tattoo restaurant.
不 是说认真的
No, like, for real.
我就是认真的啊
I am being real.
会很棒 前所未有的概念
It’s a great… It’s never been done before.
我查过 谷歌♥的
I looked it up. I googled it.
前所未有的概念 都不曾在梗里出现过
It’s never been done, not even as a joke.