喜剧之王

Which I later originated.
如果没坏 别修他
If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
想知道为何我知道那为何好吗
Want to know how I know it’s so good?
-是的 -因为我嫉妒你
-Yes. -’cause I envy you.
我恨你 同时我嫉妒你
I hate you, but I envy you
因为那很干脆 很出色 那是你自己的幽默
because it’s purity, it’s marvelous,
没有人做得到 只有你
no one else could do it, but you.
我不会撒谎的
I wouldn’t lie.
我不会撒谎的 鲁朴
I wouldn’t lie to you, Rupe.
如果你想的话 周末是你上台的好时机
This weekend is perfect
我们再修理一下
We’ll hash it around,
仅仅是我想知道你是怎么做到
Only ’cause I want to know how you do it.
那里会有人 不过我们可以继续工作
There’ll be people there, but we can still work.
非常好
It sounds great.
-好极了 -我真的想来
-Terrific. -I would really like to come.
我能带人来吗
Could I bring somebody?
女孩
A young lady?
非常特别的女孩
A very special young lady.
当然 我也想见她
Of course. I’d like to meet her.
杰瑞 你好吗
Hey, Jerry, how you doing?
你好吗
How are you?
你看起来气色不错
You’re looking good.
你该看看我穿白丝绸
You should see me in my white taffeta.
好节目 杰瑞
You’re doing some great shows, Jerry.
非常感谢
Thanks a lot.
让我在你的节目露面如何
How about putting me on your show?
我昨晚该让你上
I could have used you last night.
杰瑞 杰瑞
Hey, Jerry! Hey, Jerry!
下来吧
Come on down!
杰瑞 你好吗
Hi, Jerry, how are you?
你好
Hi, there.
莫里斯 你会不敢想象
Morris, you will not believe
谁在下面
who’s coming down here.
杰瑞·兰福 是吗
Jerry Langford, right?
是的
Right.
莫里斯 别挂
Oh, Morris, please hold on.
杰瑞 能在我的杂♥志♥为我签名吗
Jerry, please sign my magazine for me?
-当然 -你真好
-Yeah. -You’re wonderful.
我一直在看你的演出
I’ve watched you your entire career.
你真是世界欢乐之源
You’re a joy to the world.
请给我的侄子莫里斯说几句
Please say something to my nephew Morris on the phone.
他在医院里
He’s in the hospital and…
对不起 我迟了
I’m sorry. I’m late.
你真该得癌症
You should only get cancer!
我希望你得癌症
I hope you get cancer!
杰瑞 签个名
Jerry, an autograph?
不行 我迟了
I can’t. I’m late.
不敢相信他是那样的人
I can’t believe that kind of a person!
是的 先生 你好
Yes, sir. Oh, hi.
你好 最近怎么样
Hi. How are you?
不错
Not bad.
好 好 我也不错
Good. Good. I’m fine.
我能帮你是吗
Can I help you?
是的 我想见杰瑞
Yes. I’d like to see Jerry, please.
你是
You are…
普金
Pupkin.
鲁朴·普金
Rupert Pupkin.
破金先生来了
Mr. Potkin is here.
是的 好的
That’s right. O.K.
她很快就来了
She’ll be with you in a minute.
是谁
Who was that?
龙小姐
Miss long.
我想
Oh, well…I’d…
我想见杰瑞
Prefer to see Jerry.
龙小姐会打点一切的
Miss long will take care of you.
好的 我会在这等
O.K. I’ll wait right here.
为了作为鲁朴登台的
And as a surprise
意外惊喜
to Rupert being on the show with us tonight,
我想向大家介绍
We’d like to present to you someone
一位神秘客人
in a form that we’ve never presented before, a mystery guest.
请热烈欢迎我们的神秘客人
Please welcome our mystery guest.
掌声欢迎
Let’s hear it for him.
杰瑞 谁是这神秘客人
Jerry, this is the mystery guest?
这是我们的神秘客人
This is the mystery guest.
让我看看我能否认得他
Let’s see if I can place him.
我想可以的
I think I know.
你不记得我了吗
Don’t you remember me?
不 不记得了
No, I don’t.
我是乔治·凯普
I’m George Cap.
乔治·凯普 我的中学校长
George Cap, my high school principal.
你猜到了
You guessed it.
你那时常常不让我通过
You used to fail me all the time.
你要他上来干嘛 他是敌人
What do you have him on for? He’s an enemy.
你活该
Only because you deserved it.
谢谢你
Oh, thank you.
我现在是和平使者了
I’m a justice of the peace now.
-我举办婚礼 -是吗
-I perform weddings. -Do you?
杰瑞
Jerry.
杰瑞 你在干吗
Jerry, what are you doing?
难以置信
I can’t believe this.
这就是意外惊喜呀
Believe because it’s part of the surprise.
观众会怎么
How would the audience
看我们的喜剧之王
Like to see the king of comedy
在节目里迎娶他的王后呢
marry his queen right here on the show?
我无言以对
I don’t know what to say!
非常感谢 杰瑞
Thanks a million, Jerry.
太好了 太好了
That’s too much. That’s too much.
各位亲爱的
Dearly beloved,
当鲁朴还是一个
when Rupert here was a student
在克里夫顿高中学生的时候
At the clifton high school,
没有人 包括我自己
none of us… myself…
他的老师 同学
His teachers… His classmates…
可以想象他有如此成就
Dreamt that he would amount to a hill of beans,
不过我们都错了
But we were wrong,
而你 鲁朴 你是对的
And you, Rupert, you were right
这就是为何今夜
and that’s why tonight,
在全国观众面前
before the entire nation,
我们想向你亲自道歉
We’d like to apologize to you personally
请求你原谅
and to beg your forgiveness
我们所做的一切
for…for all the things we did to you,
同时想感谢你
and we’d like to thank you personally,
给我们生活
al of us,
带来了意义
for the meaning you’ve given our lives.
请接受最温暖的祝福 瑞塔和鲁朴
Please accept our warmest wishes, rita and Rupert,
白头谐老
for a long and successful reign together.
广♥告♥后我们继续直播婚礼
We’ll be back to marry them right after this word.
-普金先生 -你今天好吗
-Mr. Pupkin. -How are you today?
-我很好 -好 好
-I’m fine. -Good. Good.
感谢你带来的录音带
I want to thank you for your tape.
我们听过后都很感兴趣
We listened to it with great interest.
你的作品里
We see a lot of good things
有不少出色的地方
In what you’re doing.
我们觉得你很有潜力
We think you have a very good potential.
好
Good.
所以我们会很坦白
Which is why we’re being honest.
坦白 当然如此
You should be.
我仅仅认为你现在还没准备好
We just don’t think you’re ready yet.
觉得我还没准备好
Don’t think I’m ready?
我们觉得你现在还不适合与杰瑞合作
Now you’re not right for Jerry.
不适合与杰瑞合作
Right for Jerry. Mm-hmm.
有一些段子很好