此房是我造

我能问你点事吗
May I ask you something?
我不保证会回答
I can’t promise I’ll answer.
嗯 好 我就这意思
R… right, that’s exactly what I meant.
你一路上可以说话吗
Um, are you allowed to speak along the way?
我觉得大概会有些规矩
I was thinking there might be rules.
这么说吧
Let me put it this way
很少有人能做到全程一句不说
very few make it all the way without uttering a word.
人们总是突然就有奇怪的冲动
People are overcome with a strange and sudden need
要在路上说点什么
to confess on these trips.
不能说所有言论
And not all of it can be said to be
都有很高的文采
of great rhetorical quality
但都高兴地持续了下去
but do carry on merrily.
我也没指望你会告诉我
Just don’t believe you’re going to tell me something
什么我没听说过的
I haven’t heard before.
我会试着把我的故事
I will tentatively divide my tale
分成十二年间的
into five randomly chosen incidents
五个随机选择的事件
over a twelve-year period.
1号♥事件
我站在这儿 拿着千斤顶
So I’m standing here holding this jack
烂东西没什么用
crap’s not working.
我能借一下你的千斤顶吗
Do you, uh, do you have a jack I could borrow?
抱歉 我没有
No, I’m sorry.
– 没有吗 – 没有
– No? – No
奇怪 我以为每个人都有千斤顶
That’s odd, I thought everyone had a jack.
我就没有
I don’t.
那或许你能帮忙看下我的车吗
Perhaps you could have a look at my car?
我不需要看你的车
Well, I don’t have to have a look at your car.
你的千斤顶的问题在于它坏了
The issue with your jack is it’s broken.
这儿
There.
那 遇到这情况我该怎么办
So, uh, what’s a person like me supposed to do?
我觉得
Well, I suppose
我可以开到桑尼的修理店
I could, uh, drive over to Sonny’s repair shop
然后打电♥话♥叫路边援助
and call for roadside assistance.
离这儿大概 五英里远
It’s about, uh, five miles from here.
那是哪种修理店
What kind of repair shop is it?
桑尼是铁匠 手艺很好
It’s… it’s.. Sonny’s a blacksmith, very good one.
铁匠
Blacksmith.
或许这位桑尼可以修好这个千斤顶
Well, maybe this Sonny can repair the jack?
这个你得跟桑尼说
You’d have to talk to Sonny about that.
那我可以拜托你载我过去吗
Perhaps, I could entice you to drive me there?
拜托了
Please.
哎呀 这是个错误
Oops, that was a mistake.
错误
Mistake?
我 上了你的车
Me getting in this car with you.
一般妈妈们是怎么说
What was it one’s mother used to say
别上陌生人的车的
about not getting into cars with strangers?
这个嘛
Well..
我可不知道知道你妈是怎么说的
I wouldn’t know what your mother said.
搞不好你是个连环杀手
You might as well be a serial killer.
抱歉这么说 不过你看着挺像
I’m sorry but you do kind of look like one.
你要我送你回你车那儿吗
You’d like me to drive you back to your car?
不 不用 我能照顾好自己
No, no. I can take care of myself.
抱歉 我叫你连环杀手
I’m sorry, were you offended
冒犯到你了吗
that I called you a serial killer?
没有
No.
这对我来说无所谓的
It’s of absolutely no importance to me.
可能是因为这个车吧
Maybe it’s just the van.
看着就像是那种用来绑♥架♥
It’s the kind one might expect to be kidnapped in
或者搬运尸体的车
or used to transport corpses.
不过假如你真是连环杀手
But if you really were a serial killer
我想最简单的方法就是
I guess the easiest thing would be just
把我的尸体埋在那些树后面
to bury my body back up there by those trees
不过你得记得挖个六英尺深的坑
but you’d have to remember to dig six feet down
不然狐狸会把我的坟掘开
so the foxes couldn’t dig up my grave.
我该怎么做
What would I do?
怎么做才能让你逃不掉罪责
What would I do to keep you from getting away with it?
当然了 我只要
Of course, I’d just
抓起千斤顶砸你的头就行
pick up that jack and hit you over the head with it.
这样的千斤顶杀伤力挺大的
A jack like that can do quite a bit of damage
你不觉得吗
don’t you think?
我又不是法医
I’m not a medical examiner.
它能造成很大伤害
It’d do quite a lot of damage.
别忘了这个 但愿桑尼能修好
Don’t forget this. Good luck with Sonny.
再拜托你载我回去会不会太过分了
Um, would it be too much to ask for you to drive me back?
如果这个桑尼修东西真像你说的一样神速
If this Sonny is as fast as you say he is?
我觉得还是让桑尼带你
I’m sure Sonny is perfectly capable of giving you
回你的车那吧
a lift back to your..
就像我之前跟你说的 我不喜欢
As… as I told you before, I don’t like
上陌生人的车
driving with strangers.
我和桑尼一样 对你来说都是陌生人
Well, I’m just as much of a stranger as Sonny is.
刚跟你相处的还不错
Oh, getting along just fine.
我去和桑尼谈谈 马上回来
I’ll just go speak to Sonny, just take a moment.
桑尼
Sonny.
你好啊 杰克
Hi, Jack.
过得怎样
How’s it going?
我刚在忙活米勒的拖拉机
Well, I was working on Miller’s tractor
不过这位女士还挺执着的
but this lady is being really persistent.
可不是吗
You don’t say.
失误
Big mistake.
连环杀手在我国能自♥由♥横行的理由
The reason serial killers can roam around free in our country
就在于他们与被害人之间
is that they have no connection between themselves
毫无联♥系♥
and their victims.
所以 你刚刚让桑尼看见
So, you just made a big mistake
我俩出现在一起是个大失误
letting Sonny see the two of us together.
你知道吗
You know..
说实话 我人生中还有
…honestly, I have more important things
更重要的事要做
to be doing with my life
而不是在这儿搞这个破烂
than messing around with this crap.
你 是你说他很厉害的
You… you said he was really good.
没错 我觉得桑尼只是
Yeah, well, I’m sure Sonny was just
被你的喋喋不休弄得太烦躁了
distracted by your goddamned blabbering.
现在我得走了 我还有约
Now I have to go, I have an appointment.
有约 做什么啊
Appointment, what appointment?
那他妈不关你的事 对吗
That’s none of your goddamn business now, is it?
你不能就这样把我丢在这儿
You’re not just gonna leave me here.
事实上 没错 我就这么想的
In fact, yes, that is kind of what I was thinking.
肯定会有另一个连环杀手路过
I’m sure there will be another serial killer passing by
载你去桑尼的修理店
who can give you a lift back to Sonny’s.
除非他打算先杀了你
That is, unless he decides to kill you first.
哪怕我求你送我回去吗
Even if I was to beg you to drive me back?
最后一次嘛
Just a last time?
真的求你了
Pretty please.
我要收回我之前说的话
You know, I take it all back
你才不像什么连环杀手
what I said earlier about you looking like a serial killer.
不 不 不 你没有
No, no, no, you don’t have the disposition
做那种事的性情
for that sort of thing.
你也就是个谁也不敢杀的窝囊废
You’re way too much of a wimp to murder anyone.
天呐 你是个危险的男人
Oh, dear, you are a dangerous man
用千斤顶狠狠砸了她的头 是吧
smacked her with a jack, did you?
说实话 我听过的谋杀
Honestly, I’ve heard of more murders
数也数不清
than I can count.
顺便问问 这个荒唐的人
And by the way, what does this ridiculous man
和这些有什么关系
have to do with anything?
这是格伦·古尔德
It’s Glenn Gould
我们这个时代最伟大的钢琴演奏家之一
one of the greatest piano players of our time.
他代表了艺术
He represents art.
所以一记千斤顶砸中
So a jack in the face of
一个令人无法忍♥受的女人的脸部也是伟大的艺术
an admittedly unbearable lady was great art.
我是这么想的吗
Is that what I’m to make of it?
亲爱的维吉先生 请给我一次机会
Dear Mr. Verge, please give me a chance
为千斤顶的故事增添些光彩