你的原话是什么
How’d you say it?
生活就像鸡舍的梯子
“Life is like a henhouse ladder.”
没错
That’s right.
你说的话我在厨房♥都能听见
I can hear everything you’re saying from the kitchen.
尤其是康茨那个孩子
Especially that Kountze kid.
所有孩子里最操蛋的
Crown prince of all the little assholes.
是零
It’s zero.
零 她说是零
Zero. She said it is zero!
第一对夫妇 迈克·麦克雷和雪莉·麦克雷
Couple number one, Mike and Sherry McCray,
你们赢得了我们的大奖
you are our grand prize winner!
你们这些懒鬼
All right, you fetid layabouts.
沼泽地里也该天亮了
It’s daylight in the swamp!
起床
Arise!
加速 先生们
Speed, gentlemen.
快点儿
Speed!
如果你们不好好锻炼 早晚会被身体拖垮的
Without sufficient exercise, the body devours itself.
就是这样
That’s it!
很好
Good.
♪ 我们带来了最好的礼物 砰砰砰砰 ♪
♪ Our finest gifts we bring, pa-rum pum pum pum ♪
♪ 陈列在国王面前 砰砰砰砰 ♪
♪ To lay before the King, pa-rum pum pum pum ♪
♪ 一切都是为了国王的尊荣 砰砰砰砰 ♪
♪ So to honor him, pa-rum pum pum pum ♪
♪ 当我们来的时候 ♪
♪ When we come ♪
♪ 小耶稣…♪
♪ Baby Jesus… ♪
你的车呢
What about your car?
我们可以开着它去别的地方 波士顿 行吗
We can take it, go somewhere. Boston, maybe?
不 我们会遇到很多麻烦
Nah, we’d get in so much trouble.
醒醒吧 我们就是被困在这里了
Face it. We’re stuck.
如果我们有办法离开这里就好了
If we just had some way to get out of here.
赶紧走吧
Just split.
你可以在院子里放架直升机
Well, you could put a chopper down right in the quad.
什么
What?
直升飞机 笨蛋
A helicopter, dumbass.
他的老爸是普惠公♥司♥的首席执行官
His old man’s the CEO of Pratt & Whitney.
是啊 他有自己的飞机
Yeah, he’s got his own bird.
每天早上他都会从斯坦福开着飞机到城里
He takes it from Stamford to the city every morning.
然后停在后院里
Lands it right in the backyard.
飞行员的名字叫怀尔德·比尔
The pilot’s name is Wild Bill.
怀尔德·比尔 – 是的
Wild Bill? – Yeah.
我爸坐着飞机去了干草堆
He flew up to Haystack with it.
带走了所有的东西还有礼物 就是没带上我
Took the presents and everything, minus me.
带着礼物在天上飞翔 就像圣诞老人一样
Flying with presents, like Santa Claus.
是啊
Yeah.
就像圣诞老人一样
Just like Santa Claus.
嘿
Hey.
走吧
Oh, let’s go, let’s go!
如果我现在能回到普罗沃的家
You know, if I were back home right now in Provo,
屋子里会很暖和
it’d be really warm inside.
我妈妈 她会给我做烤苹果
And my mom, she’d be making me baked apples,
整个房♥子闻起来都是肉桂和红糖的味道
and the whole house would smell like cinnamon and brown sugar.
听起来真好
That sounds so nice.
得分
Touchdown!
嘿
Hey!
这是你应得的
That’s what you get
谁叫你这个小摩♥门♥教♥徒出♥卖♥♥♥了我
for ratting me out, you little Mormon!
什么
What?
我们走吧
Let’s go!
什么是福克联合军校
What’s Fork Union?
呃 之前你说过你不想去福克联合军校
Uh, before, you said you don’t want to end up at Fork Union.
是弗吉尼亚州的一所军事学院
It’s a military academy in Virginia.
如果我再被学校开除 我就只能去那里了
That’s where I’m going if I get kicked out of school again.
你已经被几所学校开除了
How many schools have you been kicked out of?
三所
Three.
所以我才一直读同一个年级
That’s why I’m still a junior.
翻来覆去的 – 不见了
Give or take a semester. – It’s gone!
我的手套不见了
My glove’s gone.
那个混♥蛋♥故意弄丢一只手套
Twisted fucker orphaned that glove on purpose.
留一只会让你更受折磨
Left you with one so the loss would sting that much more.
嘿
Hey.
你没事吧
You all right?
我做了一个噩梦
I had a nightmare.
我也会做噩梦
I get nightmares too.
我总是梦到自己跌倒或溺水
I’m always falling or drowning.
我也是…
Also…
我梦到自己出了车祸
I had an accident.
是啊 你都说梦话了
Yeah, you did.
嘘 别哭了
Shh. Stop crying.
如果他们听到你的声音 肯定会把你钉在十字架上
If they hear you, they’ll crucify you.
讽刺的是 你还是个佛教♥徒♥
Which would be ironic since you’re Buddhist.
我知道这是一所优秀的学校
I know this is an excellent school,
我的哥哥们就是在这里读书的
and my brothers went here,
但是我很想念我的家人
but I miss my family,
我在这里没有朋友
and I have no friends.
你太高估朋友这个词了
Yeah, well, friends are overrated.
早上我帮你把床单藏起来 好吗
I’ll help you hide the sheets in the morning, all right?
试着睡在没哭湿的枕头上吧
In the meantime, find a dry spot and try to get some sleep.
谢谢
Thank you.
该死的芦笋
Fucking asparagus.
别搞了
Are you kidding me?
现在才十一点 他就已经点火了
It’s only 11:00, and he’s already lit.
我都能闻到他身上的威士忌味
I can smell the whiskey on him.
你能怪他吗 这里很冷
Can you blame him? It’s freezing in here.
这里他妈的是格陵兰岛
It’s fucking Greenland in here.
这他妈的是什么
What the hell is that?
我就知道
I knew it!
他终于屈服了 这个大软蛋
He finally caved, the big softie.
嘿 你们有人喜欢滑雪吗
Hey, any of you guys like to ski?
谢谢
Thank you.
再见
Goodbye, now.
太好了
Yes!
好消息 先生们
Well, good news, gentlemen.
我成功联♥系♥到了伍德鲁普博士和你们的父母
I was able to reach Dr. Woodrup and your parents.
呃 大多数人的父母
Uh, most of them, anyway.
试着再打一次吧
Try calling again. Just one more time, please.
没意义的
There’s no point.
前台说他们不接电♥话♥
The front desk says they’re not answering.
他说他们外出远足去了
He says they’re away on some excursion.
远足
Excursion.
我和你一样失望 甚至更失望
I’m as disappointed as you are, if not more so.
我本来安闲地读着悬疑小说
I could have been spending the rest of my vacation
度过剩下的假期
reading mystery novels.
没准儿他们现在已经回来了 再打一次吧
Maybe they’re back now. Just call again, please.
好
Okay.
节日快乐
Happy holidays.
你也是
Same to you.
保重 塔利
Take care, Tully.
我想就只剩下你了 是吧
I guess that just leaves you, huh?
一定要完成好所有的作业
Be sure to do all your homework.
哦 差点忘了
Oh, almost forgot.
我找到了你在找的那张照片
I found that picture you were looking for.
圣诞快乐 塔利先生
Merry Christmas, Mr. Tully.
再见 安格斯
Bye, Angus.
我们就充分利用好假期 好吗
Well, let’s make the best of it, shall we?
哦 我想
Oh, I suppose, um,
也许是史坦·劳莱 因为… -史坦·劳莱
Stan Laurel, maybe, because… – Stan Laurel.
好 你丈夫说他最喜欢的默片明星是
All right. Your husband said his favorite silent movie star
鲁道夫·瓦伦蒂诺
is Rudolph Valentino.
哦 他也很好 – 嗯 是的
Oh. He is good. – Well, yeah.
女士们 最后一个问题…
The last of our five-point questions, girls…
你呢 你结过婚吗
How about you? You ever been married?
不 曾经有一次就快结婚了
No. I did get close once.