银河系漫游指南

It hates me.
不 啊 艾迪 主机
No, uh-uh. Eddie, computer,
有没有其他办法去跟踪那些飞船
is there another way to follow the ships?
启动紧急逃生舱 真正超爽有趣的飞行
Activating Emergency Escape Pod. It’s super-neat and fun to fly!
不可思议
Unbelievable!
我来了 我来了 好的 福特 有什么主意
I’m in. I’m in. Okay, Ford, do you have any idea?
按这个先
We’ll press this.
噢 不不不
Oh, no, no, no, no.
-这个按钮 -好的 咋没动静 哦 好了
-This button. -Okay. Nothing’s… Okay!
干的好 干的好
Good man, good man, good man.
-好的 我们正晃呢 -你忘了你的毛巾
-Okay, we’re wobbling… -You forgot your towel.
让他走开 我要杀了他
Get him off me! I’ll kill him!
-好了 福特 我们 我们 -好些了吗
-Okay, Ford, there’s a… -Is that better?
没 更糟了 更糟了
No, that’s worse, that’s worse.
-干吗 干吗 别这样 别这样 -好的
-Do what… I don’t need that. -Okay.
别摇了 马文 啥主意
Stop the rocking. Marvin, any ideas?
我有很多主意 可没一个好主意
I have a million ideas. They all point to certain death.
多谢 马文
Thanks, Marv.
沃刚星球
-马格拉喜亚 -不 我们在沃刚
-Magrathea! -No, we’re on the Vogon planet.
-不 不是 我们在马格拉喜亚 -这是沃刚星球
-Yes, it is. It’s Magrathea! -This is Vogsphere.
-没错 是马格拉喜亚 我有数的 -不 不是
-Yeah, Magrathea. I know it. -No, it’s not.
-压根不是马格拉喜亚 -这就是马格拉喜亚
-There is no Magrathea. -Yes, it is.
-你在干吗 -我的头被拿走了
-What are you doing? -They took my head.
阿克图兰人的东西
They have these on Arcturan megafreighters.
用来集中注意力的
They use them when they need to concentrate.
-到底是什么 -“怡神醒脑帽”
-What is it? -It’s a thinking cap.
好了
There you go.
给他来些柠檬醒醒脑 十分钟或更长
Should give him some zest for about ten minutes or so.
现在我对目前的困境感觉好多了
Now I’m feeling much better about our predicament.
我在指南上查过该如何解救 沃刚星球上的囚犯
I checked the Guide for how to rescue a prisoner from Vogsphere.
上面说 别救 我猜你有更好的计划
It said don’t. I’m assuming you have a better plan.
唔 我有个差不多的想法 那就是我们 噢
Well, I kind of had this idea that we could… Ow!
-你们看见没 -看什么
-Did anyone see that? -See what?
-怎么了 -呃
-What was it? -Uh…
没什么 只是 呃 没什么 只是我的幻觉
Nothing, it’s, uh, nothing. It’s just my imagination.
行了 现在 大家都停下来 就一会儿
Okay, right. Now, everyone just stop a minute,
拜托 都看着我
please, and look at me.
这里肯定有些不对劲
There’s… definitely something going on here.
留 神
Just… just watch.
留神
Just watch.
好的 我想我们
Okay, I think we…
-喔 -啊 哈 你也一样
-Oooh! -Ah-ha! You too!
怎么回事
Yeah, what was that?
我猜
I thi…
查福德 你以为呢
Zaphod, what do you think?
想猜 噢 那是什么 哎呀
I think… Ow! Zarquon! What was that? Jeez!
我有个建议 但是你们不会听
I’d make a suggestion, but you wouldn’t listen.
-从来都没人听 -我有个主意
-No one ever does. -I have an idea.
噢 噢 噢 福特 干掉它 摆平它
Ooh, ooh, ooh, Ford! Kill it! Get rid of it!
好了 什么也别想
Okay, don’t think.
别乱想 别分神
Nobody think. No ideas.
别来理论 啥都别想
No theories. No nothing.
糟透了 特瑞莲就在附近
This is crazy. Trillian is in there somewhere.
-我们得想法子救她 -我有个主意
-We need an idea to save her. -I have an idea…
-啊 逃啊
-Ah! Run! -Yeeaaghh!
该停车啊
You’re supposed to stop.
好了 我没想什么 没想 没啥主意
Okay, so I’m not thinking. Not thinking. No ideas coming.
有了 我有个不是办法的办法
Okay, this isn’t an idea that has any merit at all,
但是 马文 你能不能 出手 帮帮忙
but, Marvin, can you give me a hand?
她在哪
Okay, where is she?!
谁 你找机械臂维修主管
Who, the director of robot arm repair?
巴拉德星的 特瑞沙·伽思托克·麦克米拉努斯
Tricia Yggarstuk McMillanus of… Blaard?
不 是地球的特瑞沙·玛丽·麦克米兰
No, Tricia Marie McMillan of Earth.
哦 没错
Oh. Right.
对不起 没有地球的记录
Sorry, no record of Earth.
试试银河分区ZZ9PZA
Galactic sector ZZ9 PIural Z AIpha?
-哦 好的 -她在撒谎
-Oh, yes. -She’s lying.
她苗条 她美丽 并且她在撒谎
She’s skinny, and she’s pretty, and she’s lying.
-嗯 -啊 找到了 地球
-Mmmm. -Here we are. Earth.
哦 唔”被摧毁”
Oh. Um, “destroyed.”
呃 你有没有第二家园
Um, do you have a second home planet?
-摧毁了 那不可能 -这上面显示如此
-Destroyed? That’s impossible. -That’s what it says here.
上面说为了修超空间高速公路而被摧毁
Says it was destroyed to make way for a hyperspace expressway.
是谁脑子抽风下了命令 去摧毁一个星球
Who in their right mind gives an order to destroy a planet?
他是说灰色的建筑物 吧
He said the gray building, right?
所有的建筑物都是灰色的
All the buildings are gray.
“出手 帮帮忙” 哈哈 真逗
“Give me a hand.” Ha-ha, very funny.
只有一只手我怎么驾驶这逃生舱 愚蠢的人类
How am I supposed to drive this pod with one arm? Stupid human.
过去 填表
Go and fill that in.
然后 确定在你填表时
Then, make sure, when you fill in the facilitating form…
这个交给我 我是英国人 我知道如何排队
Leave this to me. I’m British. I know how to queue.
如果你填好表了
If you’d fill that form in for me,
请尽快返还给我
and return it as soon as possible.
-填表的笔在你左手边 -你可是总统 想想办法
-Writing implements to your left… -You’re President. Can you do anything?
总统没啥权力 他们的工作就是把对权力的关注引开
Presidents don’t have power. Their job is to draw attention away from it.
我没冒犯你的意思 你人其实不错
There no things. You are great guy.
嘿 你们大家好
Hey, how you doing?
嘿 是我 你们的总统
Hey, it’s me, your President! What’s going on? Thanks for coming.
好的 我知道你这脑袋 好的
All right. I know that sponge. All right!
-下一个 -总统过来了
-Next! -President coming through.
最近如何 尖头 啊 好 是我
How you doin’, Pinhead? No, really, it’s me.
我喜欢歌♥舞伎 瞧瞧那个
I Iove kabuki. Look at that.
借过
Out the way.
来 亲一个
Give us a kiss!
你好 我来是要释放一名囚犯的
Hi, I’ve come about release of a prisoner.
囚犯释放表格
Prisoner release form.
呃 什么
Oh, wha…?
我不相信你
I don’t believe you.
这是命令状
These are the orders.
“爱你吻你的”
“Love and kisses”?!
嗯 现在 根据银河法典
Mm. Now, according to the Galactic Penal Code,
因绑♥架♥总统将被告
the punishment for a presidential kidnapping
把她喂了特拉尔的贪婪猛兽 食虫者
is to be fed to the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal.
回头见
Good day.
放开我
Ow, get off of me!
喔 这到底是什么
Ow! What the hell is that?
喔 不 等等 一定是场误会
Ow, no, wait, wait! There’s been some kind of mistake. Ah!
-将右边的框全部勾上 -好的 搞定
-Tick all the boxes on the right. -Right. Got it.
不是那个框
Not that one!
当你陷入无法逃生的境地 你会怎么办
What to do if you find yourself stuck with no hope of rescue.
想想你曾多么幸运 想想你的生活曾多么美好
Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far.
但是如果你过去的生活不怎么样
Alternatively, if life hasn ‘t been good to you so far,
那么就目前这样的情形而言
which, given your current circumstances seems more likely,
幸运的你该意识到 糟糕的生活结束啦
consider how lucky you are that it won ‘t be troubling you much longer.
好了 表给你
Right, there we go.
喔 绑♥架♥总统
Oh, kidnapping the President.
不 她不符合获释资格
Oh, no, she’s not eligible for release at this time.
那么好吧 你看 这就是总统
Okay. Right. Look, this is the President.
-喔 -好了 看 明白了
-Oh! -Okay. See, there?
他说整个绑♥架♥这件事 是个天大的误会
He says the kidnapping business was a horrible misunderstanding.
是呀
Oh, yeah.
她本意不是那样 总统令你放人
She meant nothing by it. He’s ordering you to let her go.
但这不是总统释放囚犯的表格
But this isn’t a presidential release of prisoner form.
那是蓝色的
Those are blue.
-我留在这 -好的 拿着 等会
-I’ll stay here. -All right. Hold that. Okay. Wai…
喔 他今天饿坏了
Oh, he’s hungry today.
这是蓝色的 对了
That’s blue. Right.
-我可不是记者 -我们是好朋友
-I’m not a journalist. -We’re just hanging out.
好了 这是 为释放特瑞沙·麦克米兰
Okay, this is, uh, it’s for Tricia McMillan.
特瑞沙·麦克米兰 嗯 好的
Tricia McMillan. Mm. Okay.