银河系漫游指南

they instantly see things from your point of view.
让我来
Give me that thing.
由”深思”设计
It was designed by Deep Thought,
受银河系的愤怒主妇们的委托
but commissioned by a consortium of intergalactic angry housewives
她们厌倦了每回和丈夫争吵
who, after arguments with their husbands,
都是以类似这样的话收场
were sick of ending those arguments with the phrase,
“你就是不明白 对吗”
“You just don’t get it, do you?”
啊 你是对的 我不该这么心烦
Uh, uh, and you’re right, I shouldn’t be so upset
因为生活还要继续 是吧
because life goes on, you know,
并且我也是那么过日子
and I should just go on with it.
再崩他一次
Shoot him again.
漫游不错 毛巾也不错
Hitchhiking’s good. Towels are good too.
-说啥 -这真是太棒了
-Say what? -That is brilliant.
怎么回事
What’s going…?
我看出来为什么哈玛·科洛拉要这玩意了
I can see why Humma Kavula would want one of these.
-我们最好快回去 阿瑟还在等我们 -谁在乎
-We better get back. Arthur’s waiting. -Who cares?
我在乎
I do.
多亏了你 我们才成了濒临灭绝的物种
Especially since we’re somewhat of an endangered species, thanks to you.
别生气 宝贝 放松些
Why so edgy, baby doll? Relax.
你知道我为什么生气
You wanna know why I’m edgy?
你当然生气了 你的星球都被爆了
Argh. Of course you’re edgy. Your planet’s been blown up
而且你正和那个下达命令的人 待在一起
and you’ve been tooling around with the guy who signed the order.
啊 你其实想知道答案
Ugh! You actually wanted to know the question
因为你一直希望 生命还有更多的意义
because you always wondered if there was more to life
但是现在你很沮丧 因为你发现人生不过如此
and now you’re crushed because you find out there really isn’t.
嘿 太神奇了 像是幻觉
Hey, fantastic. Psychedelic.
你无家可归 失去亲人 不得不和我在一起
You’ve got no home, no family, and you’re stuck with me,
一个不了解你的男人
another in a long line of men who doesn’t really get you.
啊 这不对
Huh? That’s not true.
你担心失去
And you’re worried you might have blown it
那个了解你的男人
with the one guy who really does.
哦 宝贝
Oh, baby doll.
把那个给我
Give me that thing.
对我没用 我本来就是女人
It won’t affect me. I’m already a woman.
没什么 只是几只小老鼠
It’s okay. It’s only a couple of little mice!
喜马拉雅山脉 不错吧
Voilà! Himalayas. Good, eh?
地球人 你必须得明白
Earthman, you must realize
你居住的星球
that the planet you lived on
是由老鼠委托建造 付款 并经营的
was commissioned, paid for and run by mice.
你指的老鼠 就是那 些毛茸茸的白色小东西
When you say mice, do you mean the little furry white creatures
有胡须 耳朵 爱吃奶酪
with whiskers, ears, cheese?
没错 但他们已经进化得象我们一样 是高等智慧生物
Yeah, but they’re protrusions into our dimension of hyperintelligent beings.
我不知道 你说的奶酪
I don’t know this cheese of which you speak,
但他们在地球上 拿你们做试验
but they were there on Earth as mice experimenting on you.
我现在知道你弄错了
I see where you’ve become confused now.
是我们在拿他们作实验的
You see, we were experimenting on them.
不对 也对 也不对 是他们让你们这么认为的
Ah, no, well, yeah, no. That’s what they wanted you to think,
实际上你们只是 他们的电脑程序中的一部分
but you were actually elements in their computer program.
其实 这可以解释很多事情
Actually, this explains a lot.
我这辈子总有些奇怪的感觉
All my life, I’ve had this strange feeling
觉得世界正酝酿着一个大阴谋
there’s something big and sinister going on in the world.
不 那只是妄想 每个人都会这样的
No, that’s normal paranoia. Everyone in the universe gets that.
或者我有点老了 累了 但是找出人生目标
Perhaps I’m old and tired, but the chances of finding out
还是那么的遥不可及
what’s actually going on are so absurdly remote
倒不如把那搁置一边 让自己充实一些
that the only thing to do is say hang the sense of it and keep yourself busy.
每天我更情愿快乐 而不是清醒
I’d much rather be happy than right any day.
-那么你快乐吗 -呃 不
-And are you? -Uh… no.
当然 这就是最失败的地方
That’s where it all falls down, of course.
你瞧 到了
Here you are then.
这是
Is this…?
差不多就这样了
It’s, um… It’s all there.
差不多完工了
You know, it all works.
欢迎回家
Welcome home.
-嘿 -嘿 哥们
-Hey! -Hey, man!
-你来啦 -惊喜
-There you are! -Surprise!
你们干吗呢 你们怎么了
What are you doing? What happened to you?
这是茶吗
Is that tea?
-起先 主人攻击我们 -嗯
-First, our hosts attacked us. -Right.
接着他们用这些来补偿
But then they made up for it by making us…
这么好吃的茶点
this amazing meal.
现在 现在好了 一切都好了
It’s so… Everything’s right. Everything’s delicious.
哦 真是太棒了
Oh, come on, that’s lovely.
很高兴你喜欢 地球人
We’re glad you like it, Earth creature.
呃 会讲话的老鼠 酷啊
The, um, talking… talking mice. Cool.
-坐下 地球人 -哦 谢谢 谢谢款待
-Sit, Earthman. -Oh, thank you. Thank you for that.
-请 喝茶 -呃 打扰下
-Please, drink. -Um, uh, excuse me.
呃 还有别的事情了
Uh, is there anything else?
没了 我们很满意 谢谢
No, we’re quite happy, thank you.
那好 我在外面等 那么
Um, good, I’ll be outside, so…
你说对了
You were right.
-请喝茶 -好
-Please, drink. -Yes.
他说得对
He was right.
现在 来谈正事
Now, to business.
谈正事
To business!
吃
Eat!
-嘘 -抱歉
-Shh. -Sorry.
我们花了很长时间 用你们的星球
As you know, We’ve spent a lot of time on your planet
寻找终极问题的答案
looking for this ultimate question.
可它却在我们面前爆♥炸♥了
Only to have it blow up in our faces. Literally.
所以你才会来到这儿 我们已经签了大单
Which is why you’re here. We’ve been offered a lucrative contract
要去做很多五维电视访谈节目
to do several 5-D TV chat shows.
所以 我们必须得有结果
But here’s the point. We must have product.
我们需要终极问题的答案 或听起来像是答案
We need the ultimate question, or one that sounds ultimate.
-当然 -我们重新建造了这个星球
-Of course. -We’ve rebuilt the planet.
现在我们需要的就是 那片缺失的拼图
Now all we need is the missing piece of the puzzle.
-恰好就是你的脑子 -没错
-Which happens to be your brain. -Right.
再来些茶
More tea?
等等 你刚才是说 你需要我的脑子
Sorry, did you just say you need my brain?
是的 用来完成程序计算
Yes, to complete the program.
你不能拿走我的脑子 我正用着呢
You can’t have my brain. I’m using it.
-它几乎没用 -没用 无♥耻♥ 无♥耻♥的老鼠
-Hardly. -Hardly? Cheeky… Cheeky mouse.
查福德 特瑞莲
Zaphod! Trillian!
福特
Ford.
食物里放了什么
What was in that food?
茶里放了什么
What was in my tea?
别害怕 不疼的
Don’t worry. You won’t feel a thing.
等一会儿
Just wait a sodding minute.
你的问题 答案就是42
You want a question that goes with the answer 42?
那么 6乘7怎么样
What about, what’s 6×7?
或者 换一个灯泡 需要多少沃刚人
Or, um, uh, how many Vogons does it take to change a light bulb?
再来一个问题 人的一生要走多少路
Here’s one: how many roads must a man walk down?
嘿 这个不赖
Hey, that’s not bad.
好 好 拿去吧 因为我的脑子里满是问题
Fine. Fine, take it, ’cause my head is filled with questions,
却没有任何答案
and no answer to any one of them
能让我快乐
has ever brought me one lota of happiness.
只有一个
Except for one.
唯一一个问题 我是需要答案的
The one. The only question I’ve ever wanted an answer to.
她爱我吗
Is she the one?
我要的答案不是什么42 而是爱
The answer bloody well isn’t 42, it’s yes.
确凿无疑 明确直接的爱
Undoubtedly, unequivocally, unabashedly, yes.
在那一周
And for one week,
在我微不足道的人生里 短暂的一周里
one week in my sad little… blip of an existence…
让我快乐
it made me happy.
答的不错
That’s a good answer.
我们不要什么快乐 我们要出名
We don’t want to be happy. We want to be famous.
-什么”爱你爱我”之类的垃圾 -拿他的脑子
-What’s this “Is she the one” tripe? -Take his brain!
别 别拿我的脑子 别拿我的脑子 耗子
No, don’t take the brain! Don’t take the brain, mice!
不是我♥干♥的
It wasn’t me!
我成名了
I’m famous.
打他 快 打他
Shoot him, quickly, shoot him!
噢 歇菜了