宿醉2（2011）

This one was following me
像只小狗一样 一整晚
around like a little puppy dog. All night.
说他爱上我了 还让我嫁给他
Saying he’d fallen in love with me. Asked me to marry him.
这就是斯图
Classic Stu!
-我们没真结婚吧 -当然没
– We didn’t get married, did we? – Course not!
我们只是在贵宾房♥里爽了一把
We just had some fun in the Chardonnay room.
-我们在那干什么了 -咱们还是回到正题上吧
– What happens in the Chardonnay room? – Let’s just stay on task.
我跳舞给他看 他挑逗我 我们做♥爱♥了
I danced for him. He tickled me. We had sex.
-肏 -没关系 你还没结婚呢
– Fuck! – It’s ok. You’re not married yet.
-没关系的 -这是劈腿
– No big deal. – It’s cheating!
不是有意冒犯 你是个美女
No offense to you. You’re a lovely woman.
这简直是在强♥奸♥我的道德法则
It’s a violation of my moral code.
别难过了 斯图 你还挺享受的
Don’t be sad. Stu you loved it.
你哭着喊着说那有多特别
You were crying, saying how special it was.
-等等 不好意思 他哭了 -真是个爱哭鬼 他哭了
– Wait! I’m sorry. He was crying? – What a baby. He was crying.
你们没见着真可惜
You should have seen him.
他太性感了 扭成那样
He was so sexy. The way he moved around.
我不得不让他慢点儿 免得我射得太早
I had to ask him to slow down so I didn’t drop my load too quick.
-射 射什么 -你懂的 射♥精♥啊
– Load? What load? – Oh, you know… My sperms.
我觉得你英语不太地道 你是想说我射♥精♥吧
I think your English is off. You’re talking about my sperm!
-你哪来的精 -我蛋里长的
– Where would your sperm come from? – From my balls!
-等等 不是吧 -等等 难道你是
– Hold on! Back up! – Wait… Are you…
这就是曼谷 宝贝儿
Hey. You’re in Bangkok, sweetie.
-这就是为什么曼谷不叫漫股 -肏
– There’s a reason they don’t call it “Bang-cunt”. – Oh!
-哇靠 -日
– Oh god! – Wow.
我没懂 这是什么魔术吗
I don’t get it. Is this a magic show?
拜托 斯图 可美了 我们同时高♥潮♥了
Come on, Stu, it was beautiful. We climaxed at the same time.
这怎么可能
How’s that work?
我射进你身体 你射到地上
Shoot my load into you. Shoot your load on the floor.
-好了 -你完爆了我…的菊
– Ok! – You ruined me. Ruined bottom.
噢天哪
Oh god!
斯图 又不是世界末日
Stu! It’s not the end of the world.
对不起 可我太纠结了
Sorry, but I’m so confused.
我被一个 有胸的男人干了
I made love to a man… with boobies.
听着 我保证没人会知道这事
Listen. I promise you no ones ever gonna find out about this.
可我们自己知道
But we found out about it.
那我们就忘了他 我们会的
And then we forget. That’s what we do!
我♥干♥过的肏蛋事多了 我全都忘了
I do so much fucked up shit. And I just forget about it.
-啊 -对啊 忘了就行 会淡忘的
– Yeah? – Yeah! Just forget! It goes away!
这事可能是有点难忘 但总会忘记的
That might be harder to go away, but in time it’ll happen.
我肯定会的 忘了它就行
I certainly do. Just gonna forget about it.
-就当没发生过 -好的
– Never happened. – Great!
电♥话♥ 电♥话♥ 是谁 快接
Phone! Phone! Who is it? Answer!
罗伦老爸 他又让我想起了
Lauren’s dad. He just reminded me…
-快接 -不行
– Answer it! – I can’t.
什么 他可能有泰迪的消息
What! He might know something about Teddy.
拜托 这可是个好机会
C’mon we still have a shot here.
快他妈干♥你♥该干的事 斯图
Get your head back into the fucking game, Stu!
喂
Hello?
怎么会有人在婚礼前一天跑去钓一整天鱼
Who takes an all day fishing trip the day before a wedding?
-嗯 我也觉得有点傻 -让泰迪接电♥话♥
– Yeah, I guess that is kinda stupid. – Put Teddy on the phone.
-泰迪晕船晕得厉害 -晕船
– Teddy’s seasick actually. – Seasick?
泰迪从九岁开始就是见习海员了
Teddy’s been a Maritime cadet since he was nine.
那可怪了 他吐的到处都是
That’s weird, cause he’s puking everywhere.
我要跟你说点你不知道的事情
I’m gonna tell you something that you do not know.
-我不喜欢你 -嗯 这我早知道了
– I don’t like you. – Yeah, I knew that already.
我女儿选了你 那是她的问题
If my daughter chooses you, that’s her problem.
我是菲尔·维尼克
Hey it’s Phil Winnick!
对不起 我们被
Listen, I apologize. We’ve been
好些枪鱼弄得头晕目眩 我想说
reelin in some crazy Marlin and I just wanna say…
菲尔
Phil!
-天啊 -菲尔
– Jesus! – Phil!
我肏
Fuck me!
-把我们的猴子还来 -什么猴子 自己找去
– Give us back our monkey! – What monkey? Get your own monkey!
拜托 你这傻屄♥♥ 就那猴子
Come on, you asshole, the fucking monkey!
拜托
Come on!
赶紧的 艾伦 他用枪指着咱们
Anytime, Alan. He’s pointing a gun at us!
这是咱们的猴子
This is our monkey!
别为了个破猴子害咱们吃枪子儿
No one’s getting shot over a fucking monkey!
快给他 快
Hand him over, now!
天啊 我真不想给他猴子
God, I’ve never given him no monkeys.
不 不
No, no …
菲尔 快看
Hey Phil, check it out.
他那头盔上有个香蕉 这小子真行
He’s got a banana on his helmet. He’s the real deal.
这他妈怎么回事
What the fuck’s happening?
等等 怎么回事 知道我们的朋友在哪吗
Hold on! How did this happen? Do you know where our friend is?
-对 十六岁那个 亚洲小孩 -[俄语]
– Yeah. Sixteen years old. Asian kid. -[Russian]
不 我听不懂你们说什么 我听不懂
No, I don’t understand what you said! No, I didn’t understand!
他说什么了
What’d he say?
他说 去你♥妈♥的♥傻屄♥♥问题
He said fuck you and your questions!
-我的手 -菲利普 你没事吧
– Oh, my arm! – Philip, are you okay?
我中枪了 肏 我肏
Oh I got shot! Fuck! Fuck this!
没事的 菲尔 没事的
It’s alright, Phil! It’s alright!
我们会查清楚 还会找回猴子的 我保证
We’ll figure this out and get the monkey back, I promise.
谁他妈要那猴子了
Who gives a fuck about the monkey!
这他妈的怎么回事
What the fuck is going on?
斯图 我会没事吗 你可是医生
Stu, am I gonna be ok? You’re a doctor.
不知道 让我看看
I don’t know, let me look!
什么
What?
别看
Don’t look at it!
斯图亚特·普瑞斯 快他妈滚过来
Stuart Price! Get your ass back over here!
-你中枪了 -我知道
– You got shot! – I know!
-你没事吧 -我没事
– Whoa, you all right? – Yeah, I’m ok.
其实 也就是擦伤了点 缝了八针
Actually, bullet just grazed my arm. Eight stitches.
才六块钱 真不可思议
Only cost six dollars. How is that even possible?
这一切都不可思议好吗
How’s any of this even possible?
我要是当时往左站那么一步 斯图 我就死翘了
If I was a foot to my left, Stu, I’d be dead.
我们怎么办
What are we gonna do?
不好意思 哥几个 这可不是原计划
I’m sorry guys. This wasn’t part of the plan.
-什么原计划 艾伦 -我说得太多了
– What plan, Alan? – I’ve said too much already.
艾伦 什么计划
Alan! What plan?
-都怪泰迪 -你说什么呢 艾伦
– It’s all Teddy’s fault. – What are you talking about, Alan?
他为什么要来 他根本就不是我们狼♥友♥啊
Why is he even here? He’s not part of the wolf pack!
-艾伦 你到底做了什么 -不是我的错
– Alan, what did you do? – It’s not my fault!
泰迪真不该跟我们分那包
Teddy shouldn’t have been sharing from his bag.
-那包什么 -棉花糖
– What bag? – The marshmallows.
我专门给泰迪准备了一包
I had a separate bag just for Teddy.
但是天黑了 分不太清
But it was dark and it was hard to keep track.
然后 你差点坐了上去 我分不清哪包是哪包
And then, you almost sat on em. I couldn’t tell which was which.
-乱七八糟 -你把那包棉花糖怎么了
– It was mayhem! – What did you do to the marshmallows, Alan?
艾伦 你做了什么
Alan, what did you do?
这还不明显
Isn’t it obvious?
我加了点我的肌肉松弛剂 和多动症抑制剂
I spiked them with muscle relaxers. And plus my ADHD medication.
-什么 -你又给我们下药了
– What? – You drugged us again?!
不是你们 我只是想让泰迪
Not you! I just wanted to knock out Teddy
晕乎一小会儿 咱们就可以好好过个周末了
for a little while so we could finally enjoy the weekend.
好好过周末你个熊 艾伦 你还说你什么都没干
Enjoy the weekend? Alan, you told me that you didn’t do anything!
艾伦 你还信誓旦旦的
Alan, you swore to god!
我就想咱们能像以前那样
I just wanted things to stay the same.
看我的脸 你毁了我的下半生
Look at my face! You ruined my life!
我没你这种朋友
You’re not my friend!
别那么说 菲尔 你说真的 在美国也一样吗
Don’t say that, Phil! You’re serious? Even in America?
-一样 -天啊 别那样 菲尔
– Yes! – Oh God! Don’t say that, Phil!
-别哭 艾伦 -你这大胡子恶魔
– Don’t start crying, Alan! – You’re the bearded devil!
你还挺喜欢 我给你那包棉花糖的时候
You liked it! You smiled at me
你还冲我笑来着
when I handed you the bag with marshmallows.
因为我他妈喜欢吃棉花糖 你这脑残
Because I like marshmallows, you fucking psycho!
Hold住
Hey! Whoa! Hold on!
够了
Enough!
-为什么 艾伦 为什么要这样 -斯图
– Why, Alan? Why? – Stu!
因为我们仨是最好的朋友 还记得吗