旅程终点

我可以尝一口吗
Hey. Can I try that actually?
嗯 需要点时间习惯这味道 来试试
Yeah. It takes some getting used to. Go ahead.
谢啦
Thanks.
-放进去 -嗯 明白
It goes right there. Yeah, I know.
额 这个味道 额
Mmm. That’s, um…
我能 我能用下你的洗手间吗
Actually, can I… Can I use your bathroom for a second?
里面没人
I believe it’s unoccupied.
额
Mm!
-嘿 -嘿
Hey. Hey.
你没有电视机
So, do you not have a television?
-我没有电视机 没有 -为什么
I do not have a TV, no. How come?
如果我放个电视机在这里 我就会无休无止地看下去
Because if I had a TV, I would watch it all the time.
额 也许不会一直看下去
Ah. I don’t even know if I would watch it all the time,
但肯定会一直开着它
but it would be on all the time.
于我而言相当于一个壁炉
My version of a fireplace… some sort of source of warmth and light…
在角落里默默给予温暖和光亮 令我不时陷进去
in the corner, I’d occasionally get sucked into.
你小时候看了很多电视吗
Did you watch a lot of TV when you were a kid?
是啊 好多 你呢
Yeah, a lot. You?
我吗 额 嗯 是啊 是啊
I, uh… Me? Yeah. No, I did. I did.
但我跟一个姑娘同居了 她从小到大不看电视
But I moved in with a woman, and she grew up without a television.
所以我们同居的头一个月 简直要命
So living with her for the first month was like torture.
但后来我意识到 这对我才是最好的
But then I realized it was probably the best thing for me.
你俩还在一起吗 情况比较复杂
Did you guys stay together? It was complicated.
怎么说
Why?
我先跟一个姑娘约会 但她搬去了洛杉矶
Well, I was seeing this woman, and she moved to LA,
所以理论上我们分手了
so we theoretically broke up.
于是我开始跟另一个姑娘约会
Then I started seeing this other woman.
然而后来我又开始跟前一个姑娘联♥系♥
But then I started seeing the first woman again.
尝试远距离恋爱
We tried the bicoastal thing.
而第二个姑娘对此不怎么接受得了
And let’s just say the second woman didn’t take to that very well.
跟狗相处就简单多了
It’s so much easier having dogs.
呵呵的确
I’m sure it is.
你是没法滚床单了 但你也不会感觉…
Yes, you don’t get laid, but you don’t have that feeling…
好像一直在伤害别人感情一样
like you’re hurting their feelings all the time.
对 是啊 没错
Right, right, right.
我想强调一点 —
I’d like to emphasize…
我跟狗狗的关系完全是柏拉图式的
Strictly platonic relationship with the dogs.
我肯定会在文章里突出这一点的 放心
I’ll make sure to highlight that in the article, sure.
额 所以你现在没有约会对象
Uh, so, you’re not dating anybody then?
认真的那种吗 没有 我技艺生疏了
Seriously dating? No. I’m out of practice.
连搭讪都不知道怎么开口
I wouldn’t even know what to say.
想要小孩吗
Do you want to have kids?
-我觉得以后会想要的 你呢 -嗯
I think someday I would. You? Yeah.
嗯 最终会想要的 对
Yeah, I think, eventually. Yeah.
我觉得写书就有点像抚养小孩
I think that writing books is a little bit like raising children.
必须得非常小心
You have to be careful though.
可以为自己的作品自豪
It’s okay to take pride in the work,
但期望从中得利就不好了
but I think it’s bad to want the glory to reflect back on you.
听起来你挺为要不要小孩发愁的
It sounds like you’re worried about having children.
我不太想继续这个话题了
I don’t know that I want to say anything more about that.
-如果你不介意的话 -没关系
If that’s okay. That’s fine.
开开玩笑说想趁着新书宣传滚床单没关系
It’s fine for us to joke about getting laid on tour and stuff,
但也仅止于此了
but that’s… that’s about it.
我只是觉得如果可以跟人
I just thought it’d be nice to have someone…
分享这些美好的事情 会很棒
to be sharing all this wonderful stuff with.
-只是这样 -嗯
That’s it. Yeah.
过去几周里 我真的希望我已经结婚了
I’d really wished that I was married the past couple weeks.
是吗
You have?
是啊 没人能感我所感
Yeah. Nobody else really gets it, you know?
非写作圈的朋友们只会…
Your friends who aren’t in the writing biz are just…
惊叹我的照片上了《时代》杂♥志♥
They’re awed by your picture in Time.
代理人和编辑么都是好人
Your agent and editor are good people,
但他们首先要为自己的生活操心
but they have their own agendas.
跟你聊这些也不错 可你也带着你的目的而来
It’s fun talking to you about it, but you’ve got your own agenda too.
-确实如此 -并且肯定与我的大相径庭
-That’s true. -Certainly a set of interests that diverge from mine.
的确
That’s true.
所以 如果有个人可以跟你共同生活
So, yeah, it would be nice to have somebody
分担一切 该有多好
that you shared a life with…
无论是开心还是困惑 面对着她你都可以放得开
and allowed yourself to be happy and… confused with.
回到旅馆的时候也可以打给她
Somebody to call when you get back to the hotel.
问个问题 你30岁了 为什么还没结婚
I got a question. Why aren’t you married, at 30?
你34岁了 为什么还没结婚
Why aren’t you married, at 34?
-你先说 -好吧
You first. Okay.
额 我不知道
Uh… I don’t know.
我只是觉得 考虑到这是一个
I just think it’s hard
将会延绵三十甚至四十年的关系
to cast that role, you know,
想找合适的人可不容易
to fill it when you know it’s gonna be like 30 to 40 years.
无论自己的心境如何变幻
To find someone who, whatever mental landscape you’re in,
这个人也都会牵涉在其中
they’re gonna be in it too.
所以必须找到一个 对你的任何状态都能安之若素的人
You have to find someone who will fit any landscape you can imagine.
我不知道
I don’t know.
我没法像你归纳的这样好
I can’t put it as well as you can,
我是指心境这一说
you know, about these mental landscapes.
我么 我这人难相处
I just… I know that I’m hard to be around.
-我不觉得 -是真的
-No, I don’t think so. -I am.
为什么这么说
Why do you say that?
当我想要独处时 比如写东西的时候
When I want to be alone, like, to write,
我是真的需要独处
I really do want to be alone.
不管什么事 一旦你全情投入进去
I think if you dedicate yourself to anything,
副作用之一就是 你会变得自我意识非常非常强
one facet of that is that it makes you very, very self-conscious.
终而利用别人
And you end up using people…
想他们陪着你的时候就要他们陪着…
Wanting them around when you want them around…
不想了就把他们送走
and then sending them away.
但那是天经地义的
But that comes with the territory…
要成为一名作家…需要那样的自省力
If you’re gonna be a writer… That kind of self-consciousness.
这也分无害的
There’s good self-consciousness.
以及那种有毒的 令人麻♥痹♥的♥
Then there’s also a toxic, paralyzing,
-像是被通灵的流浪汉奸♥污♥过的自我意识 -的确…
“raped by psychic bedouins” kind of self-consciousness. Right.
-可怕 是啊 听起来更糟了
That is scary. Yeah, that sounds worse.
帮个忙 跟我讲讲那边那张海报吧
Can you do me a favor? Could you tell me about that poster over there?
-艾拉妮丝 -对
Alanis? Yeah.
额 大概就像其他人一样
I don’t know. I guess
我也挺容易被打动的 怎么了
I’m susceptible like everybody else. Why?
她是挺漂亮的 但那边就只有这一张海报
I mean, she’s pretty, but it’s the only thing in there.
她的漂亮是非常慵懒 非常人性的那种美
She’s pretty in a very sloppy, very human way.
她的嗓音具有这种尖促的 像是情欲亢进的特质
She’s got this squeaky, orgasmic quality to her voice.
这么说吧
You know, here’s what it is.
很多杂♥志♥上刊登出来的女性 都漂亮 但不具挑逗性
A lot of women in magazines are pretty in a way that is not erotic…
那是因为她们不像任何你认识的人
because they don’t look like anybody that you know.
没错
That’s true.
你不会想象她们在停车场 往计时器丢硬币的样子
You can’t imagine them putting a quarter in a parking meter…
或者 吃香肠三明治的样子
or, like, eating a bologna sandwich.
而艾拉妮丝·莫莉塞特
Whereas, Alanis Morissette,
我可以而且已经想象过她 对着三明治大嚼特嚼的样子
I can and have imagined her just, like, chowing down on a bologna sandwich.
我觉得她十分迷人
I find her absolutely riveting.
你是如何喜欢上她的 喜欢上她的音乐
Nice. How did you get into her? How did you get into her music?
我那时在听烂俗的布卢明顿广播台
I was listening to this cheesy Bloomington radio,
然后恰好听到”我想告诉你”
and “I Want to Tell You” came on.
是”你得知道” 不过没错
“You Oughta Know.” But right.
“你得知道”这首歌♥的第一句歌♥词 就是”我想告诉你”
我没明白你的意思
I don’t know what that means.
《我想告诉你》是辛普森写的书
I Want to Tell You is a book that O.J. Simpson wrote.
-啊 是两码事 -对
Ah! That’s a different thing. Yeah.
不过 如果”你得知道” 是辛普森唱的…
Although, wouldn’t it be funny if O.J. Simpson sang “You Oughta Know”…
而艾拉妮丝·莫莉塞特写了本书
and Alanis Morissette wrote a book
说自己没有杀过两个人 也会很有意思吧
about not killing two people?
哦 老兄
Oh, man.
我跟你讲 要是这堆宣传的破事
I tell you, if this whole fuss, whatever,
能换来五分钟跟她一起喝茶的时间…
could get me a five-minute cup of tea with her…
哈 你为啥不试探看看呢
Yo. Why don’t you put out feelers…
或许她会乐意见你的