旅程终点

哦 好吧 所以 你去哪儿跳 俱乐部吗
Yeah, right. So, where do you go? To a club?
我去一个浸会教堂
I go to this Baptist church.
为…为什么去那儿
Why… Why do you go there?
教友很会跳
Baptists can dance.
哇 跳舞
Wow. Dancing.
但我不跳Vogue舞
I will not vogue.
注重拗造型
这是我不会去涉及的领域 我不跳Vogue
That is where I put my foot down. I do not vogue.
是啊 相当有意思的 很多人会来
Yeah. It’s really cool though. Like a lot of people show up.
穿着舞鞋
And they got their dancin’ shoes on.
很好 很舒服
It’s good. It’s nice.
基本上每个人都不去打扰别人
Everyone for the most part just leaves each other alone.
在你走之前 最好我们可以
I thought it might be nice before you go, if…
额 互相留个地址什么的
Uh, maybe we could exchange address data or something?
好的 当然好
Yeah. Absolutely.
-好的 我理下东西 -好的
Yeah. I’ll get my stuff together. Great.
我去给我的车刻个冰雕出来
I’ll start carving an ice sculpture out of my car.
都冻得跟南极一样了
It’s like Antarctica out there.
额 狗的玩意儿 扔的玩具
Uh, dog stuff. Throw toys.
咬的玩具 地毯上有屎渍
Chew toys. Crap stains on carpet.
额 壁炉 美国国旗 书架上有个鲨鱼玩偶
Uh, fireplace. American flag. Shark doll on bookcase.
艾拉妮丝的海报 额 汽水
Alanis poster. Uh, soda cans.
很多罐 有百事 有激浪
Lots of them. There’s Pepsi. There’s Mountain Dew.
额 看起来像是个兄弟会成员住的地方
Um, looks like a frat.
不过是个书虫兄弟会成员
A kind of bookish frat.
额 有本波提切利挂历 《维纳斯的诞生》
Uh, there’s a Botticelli calendar… Birth of Venus.
额 木头象棋 厄普代克的明信片
Uh, wooden chess set. Postcard of Updike.
额 大脑对比图
Um, brain comparison…
男人的 女人的 狗的 卡♥通♥画
Male, female, dog. Cartoon.
卧室里 巴尼图案的浴巾 当窗帘挂着
In the bedroom, there is a Barney towel used as a curtain.
有个网球 书堆上有根牙线
There is a tennis ball. There’s a dental floss on top of books.
有一堆家庭照的拼贴 像是小孩房♥间里的那种
There’s a photo collage of his family, the kind kids put in their dorm rooms.
他姐姐挺好看的 长得像是女版的他
His sister is kind of pretty. She looks like a female version of him.
到处散落着东西 衣服到处都是 跑鞋也在地板上
There is, uh, stuff everywhere. Clothes everywhere. Sneakers on the floor.
衣服垂盖在各种东西上
Clothes draped over stuff.
额
Uh…
蓝色的马桶坐垫套 看起来跟抹布一样
Blue toilet-seat cover, looks like a rug.
明信片 克♥林♥顿♥一家的 还有狒狒的
Postcards. Clintons, um, baboons.
圣依纳德的祷文
A Saint Ignatius quote.
主 教我成为慷慨之人 侍奉您如您应得之
“Lord, teach me to be generous. Teach me to serve you as you deserve.”
能施予而不计得失 辛勤而不求安逸
To give and not to count the cost. To toil and not to seek for rest.
劳作而不求回报
To labor and not to ask for reward…
唯承您旨愿但无它事
“save that of knowing that I do your will.”
嘿
Hey.
开你租的那辆车到处转时
Tell you what. Riding around in that rental of yours.
记得那顺畅感不 告诉你吧 这玩意儿连减震器都没
That feeling of gliding? This thing doesn’t even have shock absorbers.
什么 这什么车
What… What is it?
一辆老思域
It’s just an old Civic.
我知道看上去不咋样 但 老兄 它发得动啊
I know it doesn’t look like much. But, man, this thing starts.
-这其实是个问题 -为什么是个问题
It’s actually a problem. Why is that a problem?
我其实应该搞辆新的 但没法扔掉这部啊
I gotta get a new one, but I can’t junk this.
为什么不行
Why not?
它是我的朋友
It’s my friend.
啊
Ah.
嘿 戴维 我 额…
Hey, David. I, uh…
喔 恰好手边有一本哈
Wow. Just happened to have one on you, huh?
是啊 我…我有纠结过要不要给你
Yeah. I mean, I… I did debate whether or not I should do this.
-为啥 -不知
Why? I don’t know.
你不觉得这有点像什么照顾小弟之类的吗
Don’t you think it’s some kind of kid-brother sort of thing to do?
不会 谢谢 我很期待看这本书
No. Thank you. I look forward to reading this.
哦 不客气 我把地址和邮箱写在空白页上了
Oh, you’re welcome. I put my address and e-mail on the flyleaf.
哦 好的 很好
Oh. Okay. Cool.
我会 额 等我看完海因莱因就看这本
I’ll, uh… Yeah, I’ll read it after I finish the Heinlein,
到时候给你寄笔记条子
and I’ll send you a note.
好的 谢谢
That’s great. Thanks.
能进你的脑袋一探究竟会很有意思的
Be interesting to be inside your head for a while.
-我喜欢你的封面 -嗯嗯 我也是
I like your cover. Yeah. Yeah, me too.
我叫他们在英国出版时也用了这个封面
I actually had them use the same art for the British edition.
不是吧 你已经得到认可了 而我…
Come on. You got approval, and I d…
这很贴心 真的很贴心
It’s nice. It’s very nice.
别在意 这书真的…真的不算什么成功
Don’t worry about it. It was not such a… not such a big success.
嘿 有一大群人看你的书 说你是很厉害的作家
Hey, isn’t it at all reassuring to have a lot of people read you…
难道不是件很叫人安心的事情吗
and, you know, say that you’re a really strong writer?
再过几年来跟你聊这个会很有趣的
It’ll be interesting to talk to you in a few years.
你为什么这么说
Why do you say that?
我的经验告诉我不是这样的
My experience is that that is not so.
有越多人给予你赞誉
The more people think you’re really great,
你就会越惶恐自己在欺世盗名
actually the bigger the fear of being a fraud is, you know?
获得大量关注最坏的地方
The worst thing about getting a lot of attention paid to you…
就是你会惧怕有负面的关注
is that you’re afraid of bad attention.
而如果你易被负面关注所伤
And if bad attention hurts you,
那么这时你面临的潜在威胁其实是大大增加了
the caliber of the weapon pointing at you has gone way up.
-从弹弓升级到大炮了 -唔
Like from a .22 to a .45. Mmm.
听着 一部分的我是渴望着大量关注
Look, there are parts of me that want a lot of attention
觉得自己很厉害
and think I’m really great…
也希望别人能看到这一点
and want other people to see it.
我觉得这也是你我相似的地方之一
I think that’s one of the ways you and I are sort of alike, you know?
好吧 嘿 唔…好吧
All right. Hey, uh… All right.
-唉 -戴维
Fuck. David.
我不怎么确信你会想变成我
I’m not so sure you want to be me.
我不想
I don’t.
向詹恩问好
Give my best to Jann.
是你的吧 我猜
当我想起这段旅程
“When I think of this trip,”.
我回想起在他车子里 戴维和我同坐在前排
I see David and me in the front seat of his car.
我们都如此年轻
We are both so young.
他想要更甚于他已然拥有的
He wants something better than he has.
而我想要的 恰就是他已经拥有的
I want precisely what he has already.
我们都不知道各自的生活将去往何处
Neither of us knows where our lives are going to go.
闻起来有口嚼烟叶
It smells like chewing tobacco,
汽水和香烟的味道
soda and smoke.
那些对话是我所经历过的最棒的对话
And the conversation is the best one I ever had.
戴维认为书的存在 让人忘却孤独
David thought books existed to stop you from feeling lonely.
如果我可以 我会对戴维说 那些和他在一起的日子
If I could, I’d say to David that living those days with him…
并非让我从生活中解脱
reminded me of what life is like,
而是提醒了我生活应该是什么样子
instead of being a relief from it.
我会告诉他 那让我感觉不那么孤独了
“And I’d tell him it made me feel much less alone.”
别急着关 后面还有
我需要用下你的洗手间
I need to use your bathroom for a second.
里面没人
I believe it’s unoccupied.
是我 对着录音机讲话
It’s me talkin’ into the tape recorder.
雄蜂就坐在我背后 悠着呢
And Drone’s sittin’ behind me just chillin’ out.
我正在抽烟 刚说过我不会抽了 结果我又在抽了
I’m smoking. Having just said I wouldn’t smoke, I’m smoking.
这里就只有我和你的录音机
Just me and your tape recorder.