坏蛋联盟（2022）

As I was saying,
在外面，你们五个是反派
on the outside, the five of you are villains,
捕食者，无情的反♥社♥会♥者
predators, remorseless sociopaths.
哦，别说了。你让我脸红了
Oh, stop. You’re making me blush.
但里面有一朵花–
But inside, there’s a flower–
善良之花——当它绽放的时候
the flower of goodness– and when it blooms
你会感觉到那种积极的刺♥激♥
and you feel that tingle of positivity
辐射穿过你的身体
radiating through your body,
你会想一直感受到的
you’re going to want to feel it all the time.
所以我们要去刺♥激♥一下？
So we’re going for a tingle?
没有刺痛感
Not any tingle.
善良的刺痛，你会感觉到
The tingle of goodness, which you’ll feel
在我最先进的共享实验室里
in my state-of-the-art Sharing Laboratory.
好的，斯内克先生，我来推你一下
Okay, Mr. Snake, I’m going to give you a Push Pop.
太棒了帮我推一下！
Great! Push Pop just for me!
-不，分享-为什么？
-No, to share. -Why?
从根本上说，
Well, on a fundamental level,
这是为了满足别人的需求
it’s about putting someone else’s needs
-领先于你自己
-ahead of your own.
哦，不，不可能
Oh, no. No way.
蛇
Snake.
好吧，好吧
All right, all right.
这味道会特别甜
This is going to taste extra sweet,
因为我知道你有多想要它
’cause I know how bad you want it.
请给我开门。啊。。。
Pop me, please. Ah…
不。笨蛋
Nope. Sucker.
就这样
That’s it!
我会教你分享
I’ll teach you to share!
我喜欢分享。很好吃。嗯
Mm, I like sharing. It’s yummy. Mm.
完全值得。
Totally worth it.
太可怕了。
Well, that’s terrifying.
让我们试试更简单的。
Let’s try something simpler.
一个好人总是注意的
A good person always pays attention
满足他人的需求
to the needs of others.
现在，这里有一位慈祥体弱的奶奶
Now, here’s a kindly, frail grandma.
食人鱼先生，帮奶奶过马路
Mr. Piranha, help grandma across the street.
当然，当然，当然。我一直都这么做
Sure, sure, sure. I do this all the time.
-给你，女士
-Here you go, ma’am.
他肯定会搞砸的
Oh, he is totally gonna blow it.
那是什么？你说什么
What was that? What did you say
你觉得我做不到
You think I can’t do this?
不，不，不，食人鱼
No, no, no, Piranha!
也许更简单？
Maybe simpler?
嘿，看。这是一只卡在树上的猫
Hey, look. It’s a cat stuck in a tree.
再简单不过了
It doesn’t get much simpler than that.
那么，在这种情况下呢
Now, what in this scenario
会让你感到刺痛吗？
would give you that good tingle?
吃了吗？
Eating it?
这就是为什么我总是随身携带两片面包。
This is why I always carry two pieces of bread with me.
不
No.
我想让你。。。
I want you to s…
-打它-剥皮？
-Smack it. -Skin it?
-刺伤它-煎一下-唱给它听？
-Stab it. -Sauté it. -Sing to it?
省省吧。我要你说。。。
Save it. I want you to sa…
这很明显。。。太明显了。。。我要你保存它
That’s obv… It’s so obvi… I want you to save it.
哦！
Oh!
-对，对-对，对，对。当然
-Right, right. -Right, right, right. Sure.
来，凯蒂，凯蒂，凯蒂
Here, kitty, kitty, kitty.
哇，那只猫显然有缺陷。
Whoa, that cat is obviously defective.
你怎么了？
What is wrong with you?
你会让它心脏病发作。
You’re gonna give it a heart attack.
我来处理。
I’ll handle this.
怎么了，爸爸
What’s up, papa!
把他从我脸上弄下来！他在我脸上！
Get him off my face! He’s on my face!
不，不，不，不，不，听着！你在干什么？
No, no, no, no, no, listen! Wh-What are you doing?
可以请问你擅长什么？
Okay. What, may I ask, are you good at?
偷东西。
Stealing stuff.
哦，是的，我们很擅长
Oh, yeah, we’re great at that.
-抢劫-盗窃罪。
-Robbery. -Larceny.
-电报诈骗-勒索
-Wire fraud. -Extortion.
-逃税-抢劫
-Tax evasion. -Heists.
邮件诈骗-等待你说是抢劫？
Mail fraud. -Wait. Heists, you say?
那是。。。是的，这是我们的特色菜
Well, that’s… yeah, that’s kind of our specialty.
我可能有个主意
I might just have an idea.
解放猪！放了猪！
Free the pigs! Free the pigs!
那是一个动物测试实验室
That is an animal testing lab.
二十万只无助的豚鼠
Within, 200,000 helpless guinea pigs,
所有这些都被虐待狂科学家戳戳戳
all being poked and prodded by sadistic scientists.
你说豚鼠？
Guinea pigs, you say?
蛇
Snake.
我要你去救他们
I want you to rescue them.
但这是一次永久的抢劫
But this is a heist for good,
所以我带了更友好的衣服给你穿
so I brought something more friendly for you to wear.
再见
Bye.
好吧，我们的街头信誉就这样消失了
Well, there goes our street cred.
至少很舒服
At least it’s comfy.
好吧，我们需要转移那个科学家的注意力
All right, we need to distract that scientist.
你起来了-收到
you’re up. -Copy that.
可以我们需要一根绳子和一个钩子
Okay. We’re gonna need a rope and a hook.
-我有这个-其他人：什么？
-I got this one. -OTHERS: What?
你是志愿者吗？
You’re volunteering?
你从来没有自愿做过任何事
You’ve never volunteered for anything.
当然有。马上
Sure, I did. Right now.
-呃-把我扔上去。吉迪亚普！
-Uh… -Throw me up there. Giddyap!
-真的吗-是的
-Really? -Yep.
我百分之九十九相信你能做到
I’m 99% sure you can make it.
-好的-来吧！
-Okay. -Let’s do it!
嘿，儿子
Hey there, son.
爸爸
Dad?
我知道你有一份重要的工作
I know you’ve got an important job,
但我希望你还有时间跟你老爸聊聊
but I hope you still have time for a catch with your old man.
-嘿，孩子-嗯-96%确定
-Hey, kiddo. -Huh? -SNAKE: 96% sure.
你永远是我特别的男孩
You’ll always be my special boy.
啊
Aw.
大概百分之九十
Maybe 90%.
我一生都在等待这一刻
I’ve been waiting my entire life for this moment.
我不知道-可以现在，继续
I don’t know. -Okay. Now, go long.
哦，孩子，哦，孩子，哦，孩子！
Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy!
谢谢你，爸爸！
Thank you, Daddy!
五十。。。今天是星期几？
50… What day is it?
我是谁？
Who am I?
对。豚鼠被锁上了
Right. The guinea pigs are locked
在一扇三英尺厚的钢门后面
behind a three-foot-thick steel door.
只有通过通风口才能进去
The only way in is through the vents.
我进去了
I got it.
我从未见过他如此爽朗
I have never seen him so chipper.
他一直在冥想吗？
Has he been meditating?
哦
Oh.
蛇行动
Snake attack.
哦嘿，看，我是迈拉迪教授
Oh. Hey, look, it’s Professor Marmalade.
是的，没错。是我
Yes, that’s right. It’s me.
救援已经到来
Help has arrived.
把你的眼睛盯着那扇门
Just keep your eyes glued to that door.
蛇来吧，蛇。开门
Snake. Come on, Snake. Open up.
放松
Relax.
这些门很复杂
These doors are complicated.
你在开玩笑吗
Are you kidding me?
你以为你在干什么？
What do you think you’re doing?
我们应该拯救它们，而不是吃掉它们
We’re supposed to save them, not eat them.
我得说他们去了一个更好的地方
Well, I’d say they’ve gone to a better place.
好了，就这样