How’d it start? Lighting a cigarette.
现在 在电影里抽烟的人
These days when someone smokes in the movies,
要么是个神经病 要么是个欧洲人
they’re either a psychopath or a European.
好莱坞需要发出的信息是
The message Hollywood needs to send out
抽烟是很酷的
is smoking is cool.
美国电视剧 与《老友记》相似
我们需要《威尔和葛蕾丝》的演员
We need the cast of Will and Grace
在他们的起居室里抽烟
smoking in their living room.
阿甘在他的巧克力盒子间吐着烟气
Forrest Gump puffing away between his box of chocolates.
电影《诺丁山》
休·葛兰追回了朱莉娅·罗伯茨的爱
Hugh Grant earning back the love ofJulia Roberts
通过买♥♥给她最喜欢的牌子 她的维珍妮牌烟
by buying her favorite brand-her Virginia Slims.
大多数演员已经抽烟了
Most of the actors smoke already.
如果他们开始在银幕上抽的话
If they start doing it on-screen,
我们就可以让香烟重振雄风
we can put the sex back into cigarettes.
恩 是个主意
Well, it’s a thought.
我本希望会有点什么更鼓舞人的东西
I was hoping for something a little more inspiring,
但至少你动脑子了
but at least you’re thinking.
其他人 把你们他妈的脑子
Rest of you people, slam your fucking brains
往桌子上死命敲
against your desks
直到有用的东西出来
until something useful comes out.
那真是酷毙了
That was awesome.
谢谢你
Thank you.
尼克 你给召去了
Nick, you’ve been summoned.
总帅想见你
Captain wants to see you.
他看了琼访谈节目
He saw the Joan show.
他感想如何
What’d he think?
坐下班飞机到温斯顿-赛伦
Get your ass on the next flight to Winston-Salem.
大多数人都有这图象在脑子里
Most people have this image in their heads
烟草执行官们坐着喷气飞机满世界飞
of tobacco executives jet-setting around the world
在私人飞机上 一边吃着肥鹅肝酱
on private planes, eating foie gras
一边数着钱
as they count their money.
但不是我
Not me.
我喜欢跟人们一起坐飞机
I like to ride with the people.
了解你的顾客们
Know your clients.
我的顾客们把自己塞在小小的座位上
My people cram themselves into a tiny seat,
吃一片Xanax抗忧郁药 然后去梦想
pop a Xanax and dream of the moment
有一天能把脸埋进新鲜烟草堆里
they can stuff their face with fresh tobacco.
如果我能说服这些孩子中的一个 开始抽烟的话
If I can convincejust one of these kids to pick up smoking,
我的机票就给付清了 往返机票
I’ve paid for my flight-round-trip.
我要活到100岁 越来越多的医生吸羊驼烟 羊驼烟-更贵重的烟草
总帅是烟草界最新的伟人
The Captain is the last great man of tobacco.
他向世人介绍了滤嘴 就在
He introduced filters
美国文章摘录杂♥志♥ 每月一刊
烟草第一次受到“读者文摘”抨击的关头
when cigarettes first got slammed by Reader’s Digest.
后来 他成立了烟草研究学院
Later, he founded the Academy of Tobacco Studies.
这俱乐部是烟草男爵在1♥8♥9♥0年成立的
The club was founded by the tobacco barons in 1♥8♥9♥0
这样 他们就能有个地方 来远离他们的老婆
so they’d have a place to get away from their wives.
这里 总帅是个神话
Here, the Captain is a legend-
一个白手起家自力更生的人
a self-made man who started from nothing,
最终拥有了一切
and ended up with everything…
除了-显然地-一个儿子
except, evidently, a son.
尼克 我的孩子
Nick, my boy.
你恰好赶上喝东西
You’re just in time for mud.
谢谢
Thank you.
坐那 对了
Sit down there. Yeah.
好
Yeah.
你知道做真正好喝的冰镇薄荷酒的秘密吗
You know the secret to a really good julep?
不知道 先生
No, sir.
你看 你把薄荷叶用大拇指
Well, you crush the mint
向下压到冰块上面
down onto the ice with your thumb
然后碾进去 明白了吗
and you grind it in, see?
这样就能释放薄荷醇了
And it releases the menthol.
恩
Hmm.
好 你知道是谁教我的吗
Now you know who taught me that?
不知道 先生 谁
No, sir. Who?
古巴革命领袖 现任古巴总统
菲德尔·卡斯特罗
Fidel Castro.
你记得1952年吗
Do you remember 1952?
先生 我1952年还没出生呢
Well, sir, I wasn’t alive in 1952.
老天 我1952年正在韩国打中国人
Good Lord, I was in Korea shooting Chinese in 1952.
真的吗
Really?
今天呢 他们是我们最好的客户
Today they’re our best customer.
下次 我们不用再打那么多了 会吗
Next time we won’t have to shoot so many of them, will we?
不会 先生
(chuckles) -No, sir.
1952是“读者文摘”
1952 was the year Reader’s Digest
用所有那些健康方面的东西 把我们钉住的一年
nailed us with the whole health aspect.
就象丘吉尔说的
As Churchill said,
那或许就是我们开端的终结
that was perhaps the end of our beginning.
告诉我
Tell me,
你真的喜欢目前的工作吗 尼克
do you enjoy your current work, Nick?
是的 先生
Yes, sir.
这很具有挑战性
It’s challenging…
如果你能做烟草 你就能做任何事
If you can do tobacco, you can do anything.
是的 先生 我喜欢
Yes, sir, I like that.
你知道 尼克 你刚好让我想起
You know, Nick, you remind me
我像你这么大的样子了
just a little bit of myself when I was your age.
哦 谢谢 先生
Well, thank you, sir.
就象在琼·路登秀里 你做的那样
Like thatJoan Lunden show you did.
你本可以放弃 哭泣 道歉
You could have given up, cried, apologized,
但你没有
but you didn’t.
你表现得很忠诚
You stayed loyal.
而且你还好好地治了那狗♥娘♥养♥的一下
And you gave it to that son of a bitch good.
我很荣幸
(chuckles) -My pleasure.
好了 BR有个主意
Now, BR’s come under the idea
我们应该贿赂一下好莱坞的制片商
that we should start bribing producers in Hollywood
让那些演员在银幕上抽烟
to make the actors smoke on screen.
你知道 就象以前
You know, like in the old days.
哦 那真是 恩
Say, that’s, uh…
真是好主意
that’s a great idea.
那BR真是聪明人
Smart man, that BR.
哦 是的是的
Oh, yeah, yeah.
而且忠诚
And loyal.
奥多兰·菲利斯蒂尔 参议员
佛蒙特 切达干酪 越来越好
是 先生
Yes, sir?
坐下 荣
Have a seat, Ron.
你瞧 荣 我不能到所有需要我去的地方
You, see, Ron, I can’t be everywhere I’m needed.
这就是为什么我派你这样的人
That’s why I send people like you
去代表我说话
to speak on my behalf.
当你们在那边的时候 你不是荣·格地
When you’re there, you’re not Ron Goode,
那个大概很讨朋友喜欢的人
the guy your friends probably like,
你是菲利斯蒂尔参议员的副官
you’re Senator Finistirre’s aide,
而你的名字真的不重要
and your name really doesn’t matter.
那么 当
So, when
荣·格地在琼·路登秀上
Ron Goode acts like a complete asshole
做事像个彻头彻尾的傻瓜一样时
on the Joan Lunden Show,
我就成了琼·路登秀上的傻瓜
I am being an asshole on the Joan Lunden Show.
参议员 先生 他对我出言不逊就像
Senator, sir, he sprang on me like…
你到底在哪里找到癌症男孩的
Where in the hell did you find cancer boy?
他本来是很可靠的
He was supposed to be quite reliable.
肺委员会是他的介绍方之一
The Pulmonary Council was one of his references.
他妈的非赢利组织
Fucking nonprofits.
当你在寻找一个癌症孩子的时候
When you’re looking for a cancer kid,
他应该是绝望的
he should be hopeless.
他应该坐把轮椅
He should have a wheelchair.
他应该说话有困难
He should have trouble talking.
他应该有个小小金鱼宠物
He should have a little pet goldfish
装在拉链包里到处走
he carries around in a ziplock bag-
绝望的
hopeless.
我道歉 先生 但如果不是
I apologize, sir, but if it wasn’t
尼克·内勒的话 -尼克·内勒
for Nick Naylor… -Nick Naylor?
你别想拿他当借口
Don’t you even think of using him as an excuse.
那人说谎就跟吃饭一样
The man shills bullshit for a living.