瑞士军刀男

什么
What?
喂 喂 你没事吧
Hey. Hey! Hey, you okay?!
拜托
Please.
拜托别死 你没事吧
Please don’t be dead. You okay?
你还好吗
You okay?
说句话 喂 喂
Hello? Hello? Hello?
别死啊 拜托
Please don’t be dead. Come on.
二 呼吸
And two. Breathe.
不是吧
Holy shit.
有意思
That was funny.
真有意思
That was really funny.
其实 我…
You know, I…
我一直希望临死的时候
I had always hoped that right before I die…
我的人生会在眼前回放
my life would flash before my eyes
让我看到美好的事物
and I would see wonderful things…
一段满是派对和朋友的人生
A life full of parties and friends and…
我还会学弹吉他
and how I’d learned to play the guitar,
甚至我的生命中 还会有个女孩
and…And maybe there’d even be a girl.
可真到了我刚才吊在那的时候
But as I was hanging up there…
我其实什么也没看见
I didn’t really see much of anything.
但我看到了你
But I did see you.
我知道这话蠢透了 可我…
And I know… I know it sounds dumb, but I…
有那么一瞬间我真以为
I really thought for a moment that…
也许 也许你的出现是有原因的…
that maybe, just maybe there was a reason that you…
等等 等等
Wait! Wait! Wait!
等等我 等等我
Wait! Wait for me! Wait for me!
走 向前冲啊
Go! Go! Go!
芝士泡芙
Cheese puffs?
你好啊 世界
Hello, world!
我叫汉克·汤普森
My name is Hank Thompson,
我独自一人搁浅在了太平洋的一个岛上
and I’ve been stranded out on an island in the Pacific all alone!
而这个人
And this man,
这个人将我从死亡边缘救了回来
this man saved me from the brink of death
他让我像开摩托艇一样把他开了过来
when he allowed me to ride him like a jet ski,
推进器是他的…
propelled by his f…
你是怎么做到的
How did you do that?
也许你…
Maybe…Maybe your…
你体内的分解产生了气
your gases built up from decomposition
还是你的灵魂在离开你的躯体
and maybe your soul leaving you?
我为什么要跟你说话
Why am I talking to you?
拜托一定要能用啊
Please work.
7月13日 星期二
你好啊 世界
Hello, world.
对不起
I’m sorry.
我得走了
I gotta go.
有人吗
Hello!
有人吗
Hello.
救命
Help!
你看到了吗
You see that?
那里肯定会有人的
There’s gonna be people there.
他们会给我们吃的 会照顾我们
They’re gonna feed us and take care of us.
大家都会想听听我们的故事
Everybody’s gonna want to hear our story,
我背着你到处走 肯定会变强壮
and I’m gonna be all buff from carrying you around.
那可不好笑
That’s not funny.
有人吗
Hello?
救命
Help.
救命
Help!
*你来自哪里*
*Where did you come from?*
*你来自哪里 棉花眼的乔*
*Where did you come from, Cotton-Eye Joe?*
天 你越讨厌的歌♥
Man, it’s always the song that you hate
往往越是挥之不去
that gets stuck in your head.
对不住
Uh, sorry.
你也睡不着吗
You can’t sleep either?
以前我睡不着的时候 我妈总会唱这首歌♥
My mom used to sing this song to me when I couldn’t sleep
那样我就不会胡思乱想了 可我记不住歌♥词了
so I wouldn’t overthink things, but I don’t remember the words.
*疯了 我他妈疯了*
*Crazy, I’m fucking crazy.*
*也许 只是也许*
*Maybe, just maybe,*
*我能独自撑过去*
*I’ll make it alone.*
*得救 我以为自己得救了*
*Rescued, I thought I was rescued.*
*但你只是个死人*
*But you’re just a dead dude.*
*我要死了*
*I’m gonna die.*
*肯定有更好的方式离开这里*
*There’s gotta be a better way to get out of here.*
*你来自哪里 棉花眼乔*
*Where do you come from? Cotton eye Joe?*
让我吃了你
Let me eat you.
拜托
Come on!
谁来救救我
Somebody help!
你 你就躺在那
You’re…You’re just laying there
像坨恶心的无用的垃圾
like a disgusting, useless sack of shit.
对不起 抱歉 我得走了
I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I have to go.
谢谢你的帮忙 算是帮了我吧
Thanks for your help, kind of.
为什么
Why?
不不不
No. No, no, no. No.
不 你个混♥蛋♥ 打住
No, you asshole. Stop it.
水 水啊
Water! Water!
你在干什么 你在干什么
What are you doing? What are you doing?
怎么能浪费
What are you doing?
好吧
Okay.
你是这恶心的世界上最恶心的东西了
Ah, you’re the grossest thing in this gross world.
等等 别啊
Wait. No.
别啊 拜托
No, please. Please.
我错了 拜托别停
Please, I’m sorry. Please don’t stop.
什么
What?
曼尼
Manny?
那是你的名字吗
Is that your name?
曼…
Mahn…
你好 曼尼 我是汉克
Hi, Manny. I’m Hank.
你好
Hello.
-你好 -你…好
– Hello… – Hel… lo…
-汉克 -汉克
– Hank. – Hank.
非常好
That’s very good.
我
I…
来啊 跟我说话 伙计
Come on. Talk to me, buddy.
别咕哝咕哝的 拜托
Stop mumbling, please.
跟我说话 说话 曼尼
Talk to me. Please. Speak up, Manny.
你像个弱智一样
How do you expect anyone
别人还怎么跟你说话啊
to want to talk to you if you sound retarded?
我说话的口气跟我爸一样
I sound like my dad.
对不起
I’m sorry.
我并非真心是那个意思
I didn’t mean that.
你想怎么说话都行
You talk however you want.
你可以咕哝着说 整天盯着自己的脚说话都行
You can mumble, look at your feet all day long.
好吗 哥们儿
Okay, buddy?
好的 哥们儿
Okay, buddy.
你好
Hello.
你打我♥干♥什么
Why did you hit me? Hey.
你打我♥干♥什么
Why did you hit me?
对不起 我…
I’m sorry. I…
我以为你死了
I thought you were dead.
我死了吗
Am I dead?
我觉得没有 你都能说话
I don’t think so. You’re talking.
可我听着像个弱智
But I sound retarded.
不会 你听着很正常
No, no, you sound great.
别说那个词 我不是…
D-don’t say that word. I didn’t…
我是坨没用的…
I’m a useless…
-垃圾 -不是的 老兄
– sack of shit? – No, man.
不是 我不是那个意思
No. No, I didn’t mean that.
我那样说话太混♥蛋♥了
I was being an asshole.
我不是垃圾吗
I’m not a sack of shit?
不是的 你很棒
No, you’re amazing.
你…你是个奇迹
You’re… You’re a miracle, or…
要么就是我饿出幻觉了