火车怪客

对不起
Excuse me.
请原谅 您是盖伊·海因斯吗
I beg your pardon. Aren’t you Guy Haines?
哦 是的
Oh, sure.
我知道你在去年的网球锦标赛上打败了法拉第
I saw you blast Faraday right off the court in South Orange last season.
-你打进了半决赛对吗 -嗯
– Made the semifinals, didn’t you? – Yeah.
我真羡慕那些有作为的人
Oh, I certainly admire people who do things.
顺便说一下 我叫布鲁诺 布鲁诺·安东尼
By the way, my name is Bruno. Bruno Anthony. See?
我想你肯定认为很俗气 但是我母亲买♥♥给我的
It’s corny, but my mother gave it to me…
-所以我不得不带着取悦她 -你好
– so I wear it to please her. – How do you do?
我不和你多说了 你继续看书吧
I don’t talk much. You go ahead and read.
谢谢
Thanks.
做名人一定很来劲吧
You know, it must be pretty exciting to be so important.
-一个打网球的算不上名人 -干事的人是重要的
– Tennis player isn’t so important. – But people who do things are.
我呢 什么也不干
Me, I never do anything.
我想您一定是赶去南开普顿吧
I suppose you’re going to Southampton for the doubles.
你是一个网球迷吧
You are a tennis fan.
我想去那里看你比赛 但我明天必须要回华盛顿
Gee, I wish I could go watch you, but I’ve gotta get back to Washington.
你知道 我来自阿林顿
I’m from Arlington, you know.
-吸烟吗 -不 谢谢 我很少抽烟
– Cigarette? – No, thanks. I don’t smoke much.
我抽得太多了
Me, I smoke too much.
我这有
Oh, here.
谢谢
Oh, thanks.
真雅致
Elegant.
“A送给G”我打赌 我能猜出”A”是谁
“From A to G.” I’ll bet I can guess who “A” is.
-谁 -安妮·莫顿
– Yeah? – Anne Morton.
你看 我有的时候会浏览体育版 看新闻部分
You see, sometimes I turn the sports page, and I see the society section.
和图片 她真的很美
And the pictures. She’s very beautiful.
是议员莫顿的女儿
Senator Morton’s daughter, huh?
你可真是事事通啊 安东尼先生
You’re quite a reader, Mr. Anthony.
对 不管问我什么我都能回答
Yes, I am. Ask me anything.
任何有关今天的体育新闻
I got the answer.
甚至是陌生人的
Even about people I don’t know.
像谁要结婚啦
Like who would like to marry whom…
什么时候要和妻子离婚 等等
when his wife gets her divorce.
你是不是知道得太多了
Perhaps you read too much.
哦 我又说多了 非常抱歉
Oh, there I go again. Too friendly. It always happens.
我有个毛病 我遇见我喜欢的人 总是显得太热情了
I meet somebody who I like and admire, and I open my mouth too much.
我猜也是 忘了它吧 我太紧张了
That’s all right, forget it. I guess I’m a little jittery.
想办法让你放松下
Oh, there’s a new cure for that.
-服务生 -是的 先生
– Waiter. – Yes, sir.
两份苏格兰威士忌 加矿泉水 双打
Scotch and plain water, please. A pair. Doubles.
这是我唯一会玩的双打
The only kind of doubles I play.
你要把它们都喝下去吗
You’ll have to drink both.
没问题
And I can do it.
什么时候举♥行♥婚礼
When’s the wedding?
-什么 -婚礼 你和安妮·莫顿的
– What? – The wedding. You and Anne Morton.
报纸上都登了
It was in the papers.
不可能 除非重婚是合法的
It shouldn’t have been. Unless they legalized bigamy overnight.
哦 对这件事情我有一套好理论
Oh, I’ve got a wonderful theory about that.
过些时候我会告诉你的
Someday I’ll tell you about it.
现在么 我认为离婚是最简单可行的办法
But right now, I suppose divorce is, well, the simplest operation.
能陪伴你去纽约真的太好了 真的
It’s wonderful having you as company all the way to New York.
事实上 我不会直接去那的 我要在梅特卡夫下车
I’m not going direct. I’m stopping off at Metcalf.
梅特卡夫 那你为什么要在梅特卡夫下车
Metcalf? Who would want to stop off at Metcalf?
那是我的家乡
Well, it’s my hometown.
哦 我明白了 要和你的妻子谈离婚 对吗
Oh, I get it. A little chat with your wife about the divorce.
差不多
Close enough.
我想 我会吧
Thanks. I think I will.
那么 祝你好运
Well, here’s luck.
干杯 让他们把午餐送到我的包厢吧
Drink up, and we’ll have lunch sent to my compartment.
谢谢 但我要到餐车去吃饭 服务生
Thanks, but I’ll go to the dining car. Oh, waiter.
餐车开饭了吗
Are there any seats in the diner?
大约20分钟以后 我很抱歉 先生
Not for about 20 minutes, sir.
你看 就和我一起吃吧
You’ll have to lunch with me.
我们接下来再说海因斯太太
here’s to the next Mrs. Haines.
真的 在大学 我是被开除的三个学生之一
Sure, I went to college. Got kicked out of three of them.
酗酒和赌博
Drinking and gambling.
不像你 唉 我属于那种游手好闲的人
Not like you, huh? All right, so I’m a bum.
谁这样说你的
Who said you were?
我父亲
My father.
他恨我
He hates me.
为了多赚钱
With all his money,
他认为我必须早起床赶上8:05的车
he thinks I ought to catch the 8:05 bus
打好考勤卡
every morning…
让我去工作 卖♥♥高级涂料和别的什么
punch a time clock and work my way up selling paint or something.
你认为男人就必须这么生活吗
What do you think of a man like that?
-这个 可能是 -我也恨他
– Well, I think possibly… – Yes, I hate him too.
我告诉你 说真的 有时候
I tell you, I get so sore at him sometimes…
我真的恨不得杀了他
I want to kill him.
-可你明白你想干什么吗 -我想干点什么
– I don’t think you know what you want. – Well, I want to do something.
我什么都想干
Everything.
我有个理论你应该在死之前什么都干一下
You know, I’ve got a theory that you should do everything before you die.
你曾经蒙起眼睛把车子开到每小时150里吗
Have you ever driven a car blindfolded at 150 miles an hour?
我想过
Not lately.
我♥干♥过 我还开过喷气式飞机
I did. I flew in a jet plane too.
真爽 差点把我发狂的脑袋都吹掉了
Man, that’s a thrill. Almost blew the sawdust out of my head.
我跟你说我打算做第一个预定登月者
And I’m going to make a reservation on the first rocket to the moon.
-你的依据是什么呢 -我不像你
– What are you trying to prove? – Well, I’m not like you.
你是个幸运儿 你很聪明
You’re lucky. You’re smart.
和老板的女儿结婚
Marrying the boss’ daughter makes
那是一个做事业的捷径 不是吗
a nice shortcut to a career, doesn’t it?
和参议员的女儿结婚 与此事没有关系
Marrying the senator’s daughter has nothing to do with it.
真奇怪 有的人♥大♥概总是动机不纯
Can’t I look beyond a tennis net without being out for something?
别紧张 盖伊 我是你的朋友
Take it easy. I’m your friend,
记得吗 我喜欢你
remember? I like you.
我愿意为你做任何事
I’d do anything for you.
真的 布鲁诺
Sure, Bruno.
我们就要到站了 我必须要转车
We’ll be pulling in soon. I’ve got to change trains.
你说她叫什么名字 你的妻子
What did you say her name was? Your wife’s?
-米里亚姆 -她叫米里亚姆
– Miriam. – Miriam, that’s it.
米里亚姆·乔伊斯·海因斯
Miriam Joyce Haines.
我想她很风流轻浮
I suppose she played around a lot.
不要再说这个了 布鲁诺
Skip it, Bruno.
一个男人被女人弄成这样 已经够痛苦了
It’s painful for a man to discover he’s been a chump.
好吧
Okay.
你想听听我给你讲完美谋杀吗
Wanna hear one of my ideas for a perfect murder?
不需要利用在浴室的插座
The “light socket in the bathroom”…
或者把一氧化碳放入车♥库♥
or the “carbon monoxide in the garage”?
我都没听过 我想这是新潮的想法
Neither one. I may be old-fashioned,
但我认为这不是合法的
but murder is against the law.
你没想过要杀死某个人吗
What is a life or two, Guy?
我的理论是任何人都有可能杀人
Some people are better off dead.
比如说 你妻子和我父亲
Well, like your wife and my father, for instance.
这使我想起了我曾经有过的一个好主意
Oh, that reminds me of a wonderful idea I had once.
我曾经整夜计划这件事情
I used to put myself to sleep at night figuring it out.
假如 你内心里想除掉你的妻子
Now, let’s say that you’d like to get rid of your wife.
-这怎么可能 -不 不 我们只是假设
– That’s a morbid thought. – No, no, no. Just suppose.
让我们说说你的理由
Let’s say you had a good reason.
-不 现在 -不 让我们说说
– No, let’s not… – No, no. Let’s say.
你不肯杀她 知道为什么 你害怕被抓
You’d be afraid to kill her. You know why. You’d get caught.
那么你这次旅行是为什么呢
And what would trip you up?
你的目的
The motive.
现在 我有个好主意了
Ah… Now, here’s my idea.
我恐怕没时间再听下去了
I haven’t got time to listen.
听着 简单极了
Listen. It’s so simple too.
两个人见了面 就像你和我
Two fellows meet accidentally, like you and me.
以前他们没有联♥系♥ 从来没见过面
No connection. Never saw each other before.
每个人心中都有想除掉的一个人
Each one has somebody that he’d like to get rid of.
所以 他们交换谋杀
So. they swap murders.
交换谋杀
Swap murders?