剧透预警 Spoiler Alert（2022）

-你快放下啦 -好
-You put that down. -Yes!
-好了。回来回来。来跳舞 -好呀。跳舞
-Okay. Now, come back. Come dance. -Okay. Dancing.
赞
Yes!
正在播放Groove Is In The Heart的《Groove Is in the Heart》
The chills that you spill up my back
Keep me filled with satisfaction when we’re done
Satisfaction of what’s to come
I couldn’t ask for another
No, I couldn’t ask for another
You know that’s right
Your groove I do deeply dig
No walls, only the bridge…
嘿，来跳舞
Hey, come dance.
无聊
Boring.
No, I couldn’t ask for another…
-你们真的好有趣 -谢谢
-You guys, so fun. -Thank you.
我带一点蛋糕路上吃
And I’m taking a little cake for the road.
-嗯，看到了 -一点蛋糕？尼克，老天爷
-Yes, I see. -A little cake? Nick, Jesus.
-就一点点啦 -很多了
-Just a little. -A lot of cake.
-真的很高兴认识你 -我明天还邀请了别人过来
-I’m so happy to have met you. -I’m having people over tomorrow.
-你好婊 -抱歉
-You big bitch. -Sorry.
-晚安 -太欢乐了
-Good night. -So much fun.
-回见 -说真的，今晚真的太棒了
-See you soon. -Seriously, this was so wonderful.
还好，谢了，女王们
All right, thank you, queens.
-感谢你能过来 -走了，爱你
-Thank you for being here. -Bye. I love you.
-节日快乐 -一路平安
-Happy holidays. -Get home safe.
-爱你。回见，各位 -再次感谢，真的
-Love you. Bye, guys. -Thanks again, really.
我是打个车呢还是…
Am I taking a cab or…
再见…
Bye.
派对挺成功的，迈克
That was a great party, Mike.
确实，是吧？挺好的
It was, right? It was really nice.
你还好吗？
You okay?
嗯。我还好
Yeah. I’m good.
约好的星期三见汤尼你还能去吧？
Are you still good for Tony on Wednesday?
-嗯，当然可以。 -好的
-Yeah, of course. -Okay.
需要我留下来帮你
Did you want me to stay and help you
-做些打扫之类的… -噢，不。天啊！不用了。
-with the cleaning and the… -Oh, no. God, no. Please.
还是，谢了
Thank you, though.
-好吧 -嗯
-Okay. -Okay.
基特，什么情况？
Kit, what is going on?
你没事吧？
Are you all right?
我后♥庭♥有点儿不太对劲
There’s something not right with my ass.
感觉就像堵了个高尔夫球在那里
It feels like I’ve got a golf ball lodged up there.
-一个高尔夫球？ -对
-A golf ball? -Yeah.
可能只是痔疮之类的
It’s probably just a hemorrhoid or something.
放心，迈克
Come down off the ledge, Mike.
我明天就去看医生。我已经预约好了
I’m seeing a doctor tomorrow. I’ve booked an appointment.
医生诊断后跟我说一下好吗？
Will you tell me what they say?
当然
Of course.
谢谢
Thank you.
好了
Okay.
-好了，回见！ -回见！
-Okay, bye! -Bye!
注意安全
Be safe.
会的
I will.
圣诞快乐
Merry Christmas.
好了
Okay.
-迈克 -凯丽
-Michael. -Kelly.
-很高兴见到你 -我也是
-It’s so good to see you. -It’s so good to see you, too.
感谢你今天能过来
Thank you for coming here today.
-当然要来的 -非常感谢
-Absolutely. -Yes. Really appreciate it.
恭喜你的节目《TVLine》上线
Congrats on the launch of TVLine.
噢。谢谢
Oh. Thank you.
你状态看起来超棒的，顺便说下
You look incredible, by the way.
谢谢
Thank you.
你…喔！凯丽
You… Ooh. Kelly.
我们开始之前我需要快速接个电♥话♥
I need to take this real quick before we start.
-好的 -我很抱歉
-Okay. -I’m sorry about that.
-我很快回来 -好，没问题
-I’ll be right back. -Okay, cool.
嘿。情况怎样？
Hey. What happened?
他们发现了组织增生
They found a growth.
等等…什么意思？
Wait… What do you mean?
他们在我的后♥庭♥发现了组织增生
They found a growth in my butt.
医生说有很多种可能性
But the doctor said there are a hundred things
包括癌症
it could be besides cancer.
我周五去做活检
I’m having it biopsied on Friday.
不用担心，迈克，我一点都不担心
Please, don’t worry about it, Michael, I’m not.
我先挂了。赶地铁去
I got to go. I’ve got to get on the subway.
基特，等等
Kit, wait.
迈克，今天在学校过得怎么样？
So, Michael, how was school today?
还行吧
It was okay.
体育课要组队，然后没人选我
We had to pick teams in gym class, and they picked me last.
-你还好吗？妈妈 -没事
-Are you okay, Mom? -Totally fine.
只是需要预约看下医生
I just need to make an appointment with the doctor.
是。好的，医生。好
Yes. Okay, Doctor. Yes.
谢谢你，医生。我会看下检测报告
Thank you, Doctor. I’ll look at the test results.
嘿，粪球，有个问题宝宝正坐在你的椅子上
Hey, turd ball, there’s a matter baby on your chair.
什么是问题宝宝？
What’s a matter baby?
没什么。你是不是有什么问题，宝宝？
Nothing. What’s the matter with you, baby?
请确认一下你的姓名和出生日期
Confirm your name and birth date for me, please.
克里斯托弗·科恩。1972年12月23日
Christopher Cowan. December 23, 1972.
过敏源？
Allergies?
热瑜伽，共用盘子
Hot yoga, shareable plates.
青霉素
Penicillin.
你和病人的关系？
And what’s your relationship to the patient?
计划就是进去
The plan is to get in there
取个样本然后送检
and take a piece of it and send it of for testing.
有没有可能就是进去之后发现没有问题
There’s a chance that you’ll go in, you’ll find out it’s nothing,
-然后各自安好 -迈克，放松。没事的
-and then we’ll just move on from… -Michael, relax. Everything’s fine.
我会没事的，好吧？
I’m gonna be fine, okay?
完成之后我会出来跟你说明
I’ll come out and talk to you right after I’m done.
迈克？
Michael?
我很担心克里斯托弗
I’m concerned about Christopher.
组织增生比我预期的大很多
The growth was a lot bigger than I anticipated.
所以这是癌症？
So it’s cancer?
基本…确定是癌症？
It’s basically… It’s definitely cancer?
结果出来之前我们无法确定
We won’t know until the results come back,
不论如何，我答应你我们都会妥善处理
but whatever it is, I promise you we’ll treat it.
噢，我的天！
Oh, my God.
我的相机呢？
Where’s my camera?
可能在布鲁克林
It’s probably in Brooklyn.
我们要错过《鲁保罗变装皇后秀》了
We’re missing Drag Race.
现在是周三，基特
It’s Wednesday, Kit.
好吧。听着，你在这儿跟我住段时间
Okay. Look, I want you to stay with me for a couple of days.
留下。我希望你留下
You can stay here. I want you to.
很显然，我和你一起生活着，迈克
Obviously. I live with you, Mike.
实际上，你没有
Actually, you don’t.
嘿，迈克。你还好吗？
Hey, Michael. How you doing?
-嗨，佩姬。你好吗？ -挺好，挺好
-Hi, Paige. How are you? -Good, good.
下节开拍之前你有一个
All right, so you have a quick window with Candace
短暂的窗口期可以采访到坎迪斯。没问题吧
before they set up for the next shot. That’s fine.
-非常感谢 -我去叫她
-Thank you very much. -Let me go grab her.
她在这儿啊
There she is.
嘿，坎迪斯
Hey, Candace.
拿到结果了
是神经内分泌肿瘤。别查。我都不查。
我们都在等你。过来吧
We’re all ready for you. Come on over.
这边。他在等你
This way. Think he’s waiting for you,
你的时间很有限
and you have a very limited amount of time.
非常感谢。嗨，迈克
Thank you so much. Hi, Michael.
-嘿，坎迪斯 -我们只有5分钟时间
-Hey, Candace. -We’ve got literally five minutes.
-好的。没问题 -谢谢
-Great. Okay. -Thank you.
-嗨，迪伦 -嗨
-Hi, Dylan. -Hi.
-好了 -好了
-Okay. -Okay.
嘿，亲爱的，我“癌”了。我是说，我回来了
Hey, honey, I’m cancer. I mean, I’m home.
这一点都不好笑，基特
That’s not funny, Kit.
嗯，我知道
Yeah, I know.