晶兵总动员（1998）

一向以领导高科技武器…
GloboTech Industries, long recognized
as the worldwide leader…
… 而闻名於世的全球科技公♥司♥,
现在将更上一层楼.
… in high-tech weaponry,
is now reaching even higher.
在公♥司♥总裁盖尔马斯的领导下…
Under the leadership of CEO, Gil Mars…
… 全球科技公♥司♥将把先进的战地应用科学
… GloboTech engineers are blazing the trail
into tomorrow’s most exciting sector.
带进每个家庭.
Introducing advanced
battlefield technology…
使您及您的家人
… into consumer products
for the whole family.
可以在家中就可以享受到…
For the first time, you and yours will enjoy
the same high quality standards…
… 与美国国防部一样的高品质产品
… as demanded by the Defense Department,
at private sector prices.
全球科技公♥司♥
为您，将刀枪变成犁头
GloboTech, turning swords into plowshares
for you and your family.
他来早了.
He’s here. He’s early.
他说…好吧
He’s not supposed to be here yet.
He said…
猛拳、大眼，都在这里
Slamfist optimal. Good. Check.
玩具鸡！
Chickens.
我来帮你拿
Let me help you with these.
兴奋吧？
Pretty exciting, huh?
我倒觉得有点难过
I don’t know. I think it’s kind of sad.
把欢乐带给小孩
是大地玩具公♥司♥一向的传统
Heartland Toys has a long tradition
of bringing joy to kids.
可惜盖尔马斯根本不在乎
Gil Mars won’t care about that.
他满脑子只想赚钱
He’s just going to care about profits.
真没意思
I think it sucks.
这就是现实呀. 也许你对我们的习俗不太了解
Welcome to Earth. You may not be
familiar with our customs…
…但这本来就是一个
唯利是图的世界
…but things work like this down here,
in the real world.
我讨厌现实的世界
Well, the real world sucks.
不过也有兴奋的时候
It does have its perks.
各位好，我是凯格小姐,
是马斯先生的执行助理
Gentlemen, I’m Ms. Kegel,
executive assistant to Mr. Mars.
我要做第一个欢迎你们加入
全球科技公♥司♥大家庭的人
Let me be the first to welcome you
to the GloboTech family.
在马斯先生致力於
电脑、电子、电♥信♥、军♥火♥、化学及食品业之後
Just as he’s done with his computer,
telecommunications and food divisions…
…他决定将大地玩具公♥司♥
也纳入他的旗下
…Mr. Mars intends to bring his own
personal touch to Heartland Play Systems.
太好了
Well, that’s good.
好了！
All right.
这是…
These are…
其他人呢？
Where’s everybody else?
已经没有其他人了
There is no longer any”everybody else”.
我是赖瑞，真是荣幸能…
Mr. Mars, it’s an honor…
少拍马屁了
两分钟後我就记不住你名字了
Cut the kiss-ass.
After I leave, I won’t remember your name.
这是艾温
This is Irwin Wayfair.
你们负责设计这些玩具吗？
I’m told you two are responsible for this.
是的，那是法丘
他是喷火队的一员
Yes, sir. That’s Flatchoo,
he’s part of the Belch Brigade.
所有的造型都是艾温的主意
Actually, the whole line was Irwin’s idea.
然後经过我的琢磨以及市场行销
使它成为本公♥司♥最成功的大卖♥♥
Once I did the marketing, it was the most
successful product in company history.
所以我才会买♥♥下这家公♥司♥
而你们才有机会留下来
That’s why I bought the place
and why you two are still onboard.
好，你们对未来有什么计划
So, let’s talk about the future.
喔，是的，这是高竿兵团
他们是…
Okay, these are Gorgonites. They…
Hi. How are you today?
我迟到了.
I’m late.
这些是我所设计的一些造型
Okay. I drew up some pictures.
你可以拿去参考
That’s a picture you can have.
马斯先生，这是高竿兵团
All right, these are Gorgonites.
这一个是…
And this one.
这是亚契，他是崇高的领袖
This is Archer.
He’s the grand, noble leader of…
这是野人，
Okay, and Troglokhan…
…他是领航员
…the navigator who navigates.
他们是来自高竿的怪兽
Okay, they’re monsters
from the land of Gorgon.
因为迷路而来到我们地球。
为了要回到高竿
They’ve come to our world and are lost.
To return to Gorgon…
他们必须在地球上尽量学习
…they have to learn all about our world.
小孩能藉此达到学习的目的
This way, kids can learn and do research…
打扰一下，你说「学习」吗？
Excuse me. Did you say”learn”?
是的，学习
Learn, yeah.
下一个
Next.
马斯先生
Mr. Mars…
让我来介绍
…let me introduce you to…
奇普少校
…Major…
魔鬼兵团的领袖
…Chip Hazard,
leader of the Commando Elite.
艾温，这就叫「多媒体」
你要多多利用
It’s called multimedia, Irwin. Look into it.
未来的世界
The future is here.
也就是战斗的新世纪…
A new age has dawned…
… 终於诞生了!
… for action!
世界上最可怕的
高科技战斗力量…
The world’s most awesome
high-tech fighting force…
… 即将在下一世纪展开
… is ready to battle for
the next millennium.
奇普，报告！!
Chip Hazard, reporting for duty!
等一等！
Wait. Hold on.
等等，停下来. 他们真能这样做吗？
Hold on, hold on. Can they really do that?
– 做什么？
– 自己走出盒子来
– Do what?
– Punch out of the box.
No.
No.
正如所料
I didn’t think so.
放心，在法律上不会有问题
There’s a disclaimer.
Legal says we’re completely covered.
你知道我不喜欢什么吗？
You know what I’m sick of?
我不喜欢看到广♥告♥上的
卡车在拉石茂山突然出现
Commercials showing trucks
popping up on Mount Rushmore…
…然後停在林肯的头上
…and parking on Abraham Lincoln’s head.
还有那些洗发精广♥告♥居然想说服女人,
And shampoo commercials that say
women can look like Claudia Schiffer…
在经过洗发润丝之後就能像克劳蒂亚一样漂亮
…after one cycle of rinse and repeat.
我希望这些玩具真的能讲话…
What if these toys actually could talk?
能走动、能打斗
What if they could walk?
What if they could actually kick ass?
尼克！
Nick Nitro.
我要小孩子们永远玩不腻
Toys that are so smart
when kids play with them…
…they play back.
我要它们真能做出
广♥告♥上的那些动作
Toys that actually do what they do
in the commercials.
很有趣的创意
That’s an interesting idea.
少跟我谈电池的事
Forget the”Batteries not included” crap.
我们可以使用全球科技
出品的锂电池，永远不换电池
Put in a lifetime GloboTech lithium cell.
能使玩具能永远运转
这样绝对赢过其他的竞争者
They’ll run forever.
That’ll piss off the guys at Eveready.
这个口号♥如何？
“和魔鬼兵团一比,其他的都是小孩玩意”
How’s this slogan?”The Commando Elite.
Anything else is just a toy.”
“所有的都是小孩玩意.”
“Everything else is just a toy.”
那…那很好
That’s good, too. Sure.
还有，先生
Sir?
现在的电脑能力
恐怕还达不到…
You know, that kind of computing power
doesn’t really seem feasible…
我们已是全球科技的一员
这种技术一定没问题
Irwin, we’re part of GloboTech.
We can find the technology.
我们连7，000哩外的目标都能瞄准,并送它个核子弹头
Our missiles can find a bastard 7,000 miles
away and stick a warhead up his ass.
这不过是小事一件罢了.它们是士兵，对不对？
士兵需要什么？
This won’t be a problem. They’re soldiers.
What do soldiers need