情人眼里出西施 Shallow Hal（2001）

电子邮件，那… – 是的，很有趣吧。
Email. That’s… – Yeah. That’s funny.
(摩里西奥) 你好？ – Mudwhistle，穿好衣服，我们出去。
Hello? – Mudwhistle, get dressed. We’re goin’ out.
(# “Roy’s Toy” by Jeff Beck)
那个家伙在电梯里给你免费治疗了？
This Robbins guy gave you free therapy while you were in the elevator?
是的，然后我离开了。
Yeah. And then – check this out –
他对我所做的治疗很有效， 现在我能博得女士的好感了。
he does this thing to me where he makes it so I can score better with the ladies.
那时我还认为这是个玩笑呢。
At the time I thought it was ajoke.
但今天下午，我看到的第一个美女 就对我发起了进攻。
But this afternoon, the first beautiful woman I saw went for me.
可能是自信的缘故。 – 是的，但不，这不一样。
Could be coincidence. – Yeah, but no. This was different.
看上去她对我或其他什么东西很疯狂。
It was like she went crazy for me or something.
我想也许是和他交谈，增强了我的自信心， 所以我现在觉得很有信心。
I think maybe talking to him helped my confidence, cos I do feel more confident.
天啊，看谁在这。
Shit. Look who’s here.
怎么回事？ 你对Walt有看法吗？
What’s the matter? You have a problem with Walt?
你没有吗？ – 不，为什么我会有？
You don’t? – No. Why would I?
你不觉得有时候恶心吗？ – 恶心什么？
Don’t you just get sick of it sometimes? – Sick of what?
对这个 “我用四肢走路，我拥有整个世界。”
The whole “I walk on all fours so I own the world” thing.
加上那些自欺欺人的谎言。
Plus all that phony self-deprecating crap.
天呀…行行好吧！他患过小儿麻痹证。
Jeez… Give the guy a break! He’s got spina bifida!
他只是在用他的手在表演他能做到的。 – 是的，他来了。
He’s just playing the hand he was dealt. – Yeah. Here he comes.
这儿有我认识的两个铁哥们。 – 嗨，Walt,你怎么能做到的？
There’s a couple of belt buckles I recognize. – Hey, Walt. How you doin’?
我看起来像有什么要抱怨的吗？
Do I look like I have anything to complain about?
除了在意你的指节间长姆囊炎。
Not if you don’t mind bunions on your knuckles.
我要去一下厕所。
I gotta go to the can.
嗨，朋友，很高兴见到你。 – 我也很高兴。
Hey, man, good to see ya. – Good to see you.
你怎么样？ – 很好。
How you been? – Good.
这里有个我认识的靓妹。 你怎样，Deb？
There’s a pair of panties I recognize. How ya doing, Deb?
好的，机灵鬼，你想要什么？
OK, wise guy, what’s it gonna be?
给我朋友一瓶Dom怎样？ – 他吗？好的，你等着。
How about a bottle of Dom for my buddy? – Another? OK, you got it.
快点。 – 发生什么了？
And keep ’em coming. – What’s the occasion?
你没有读商业新闻部分？ – 我错过了什么？
You don’t read the business section? – What did I miss?
我把我的公♥司♥卖♥♥给了微软。 – 是吗？你赚了吗？
I sold my company to Microsoft. – Yeah? And you cleaned up?
是的，如果我留着它， 我得花二十年才能赚到这笔钱。
Well, if I had an ass, I’d wipe it with twenties.
太好了，祝贺你！
All right! Congratulations!
我正式退休了，然后四处游荡。
I’m officially retired and on the prowl.
嗨，Walt – 嗨，Sally
Hey, Walt. – Hey, Sally.
我被你套住了，你愿带我散散步吗？
I got a leash. Would you like to take me for a walk?
来吧，朋友。
Come on, boy.
呆会儿见
Catch ya later.
Hi
Hi.
Hi
Hi.
哈尔 – 我是Bella
Hal. – I’m Bella.
怎么了？ – 没事
So, what’s up? – Nothing.
我的朋友都到舞池里去了 – 是吗？
My friends are all out on the dance floor. – Yeah?
既然来了，怎么不去木板上扭一下屁♥股♥呢？ – 在木板上扭屁♥股♥！(snorts)
How come you’re not spanking the planks? – Spanking the planks!
她们是你的室友，还是…？
Are they your roommates, or…?
不，我们都在战胜失明基金会做事
No, we work together at the Foundation Fighting Blindness.
酷 我曾经认识一个聋人 – (喷鼻息)
Cool. I used to know a deaf guy.
想跳舞吗？ – 好的！
Do you wanna dance? – Yes!
好的
All right.
(# “Too Young” by Phoenix)
# 宝贝，当我看到你在街的尽头转弯时
# Baby，when I saw you turning at the end of the street
# 我知道时间已经过去了，我花了很多年
# I knew a time was gone and it took me like ages
# 只是为了明白我害怕成为一个简单的人
# Just to understand that I was afraid to be a simple guy
#我努力微笑
# I tried my best to smile
# 但在我内心深处
# But deep inside my heart
#我觉得它在喊叫，就像一群人在跳舞
# I felt it was shouting like a crowd dancing
# 我想我不能没有这些东西
# I guess I couldn ‘t live without the things
# 这成就了我的生活
# That made my life what it is
#你听不到我的呼唤吗？
# Can ‘t you hear me calling？
#每个人都在跳舞
# Everybody’s dancing
#今晚一切都结束了
# Tonight everything is over
我的老天爷啊…？
What in the name of all that is holy…?
# 我不能躺在床上不觉得我错了
# I can’t lie on my bed without thinking I was wrong
# 但是当那种感觉呼唤…
# But when that feeling calls…
需要帮忙吗？ – 什么？下来！
Do you need help? – What? Come on!
# 夜晚不会再把我抱在怀里
# Night-time won’t hold me in your arms again
# 我有个好朋友说
# I got a very good friend who says
#他无法相信我给予的爱
# He can’t believe the love I give
# 不足以结束你的恐惧
# Is not enough to end your fears
# 我想我不能没有这些东西
# I guess I couldn’t live without the things
# 这成就了我的生活
# That made my life what it is
哈尔？
Hal?
都十点了 我们得走了
It’s ten o’clock. We gotta go.
你在说什么？ – 哈尔，我们得去做那事了
What are you talking about? – Hal, we gotta go do that thing.
你知道的，在住所里 – 什么事？
You know, at the place. – What thing?
嗨，抱歉，女士们 我要拖走你们的舞伴了
Hey, sorry, ladies. I gotta steal your dance partner here.
你在干什么？！ – 我在救你呀
What are you doing?! – I am rescuing you.
从哪里救我？ – 从哪里救你？！
From what? – From what?!
从跺脚的水牛那里，还从哪里！
From a pack of stampeding buffalo, that’s from what!
来加入我们吧 我正在追那个红头发的 你可以挑其他两个中的一个
Come join us. I’m goin’ after the redhead. You can have your pick of the other two.
你是说你挑了土狼 剩下河马和长颈鹿给我挑？
You mean you get the hyena, and I choose between the hippo and the giraffe?
别被吓着了，兄弟，她们又不会咬人 去吧！我要回去了
Don’t be intimidated, man. They don’t bite. Let’s go! I’m gettin’ back in there.
嘿… 去发疯吧
Hey, go nuts.
#今晚一切都结束了
# Tonight everything is over
#我觉得太年轻了
# I feel too young
嗨，吉儿
Hey, Jill.
#每个人都在颤抖…
# Everybody’s shaking…
摩里西奥，是哈尔 打起精神
Mauricio, it’s Hal. Pick it up.
嘿，兄弟，我不明白 那晚你到底是怎么回事
Look, man, I don’t know what the hell was the matter with you last night.
首先你不和靓女跳舞
First you wouldn’t dance with the hotties,
后来我们又去了IHOP, 那里的姑娘更靓，你却不见了！
and then we go to the IHOP, and those hotties are even hotter, and you disappear!
哦，我的…
Oh, my…
我等会儿再打给你 有点事
I gotta call you back. Something came up.
(# “Toxic Girl” by Kings of Convenience)
# 天上下着雨
# In the sky the birds are pulling rain
# 在你的生活中，诅咒有一个名字
# In your life a curse has got a name
准备做降落伞？
Building a parachute?
在说我吗？ – 这也太大了，不是吗？
Excuse me? – They’re a little big, aren’t they?
噢，我知道了。 你是把你帆船上的三角帆给撕了，对吗？
Oh, I get it. You ripped the spinnaker on your sailboat, right?
对不起。看你这样的女孩子 拿着一条老女人用的裤子，真好笑。
Sorry. It seemed so funny seeing someone like you holding up a pair of old-lady trou.
像我一样的人？
Someone like me?
当然。你知道的， 像你这样身材好的。
Yeah. You know, someone so fit.
你是一头蠢驴。
You are ajackass.
小姐，等等。 对不起，我不是有意冒犯你。
Miss, please. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you.
嗨，该死的，为什么不再多喝点， 好让我一个人呆着
Hey, unibrow, why don’t you double your dosage and leave me alone?
噢，噢。忘了我说的。 看，我真的很愚蠢。
Whoa, whoa. Let’s start over. Look, that was really dumb of me.
你可能是给你身边的人买♥♥的 而我却侮辱了她。
You were probably buying ’em for someone close to you, and I insulted them.
不管怎样， 我想让你知道 我不是想吓跑你。
However you took it, I want you to know I didn’t mean to piss you off.
我想见你，我还猜…
I wanted to meet you, and I guess…
我想我有时候控制不了自己
I guess I’m not real smooth sometimes.
让我请客，来弥补我的过失。
Let me make it up to you.
打扰了，小姐。 一切都还好吗？
Excuse me, Miss. Is everything all right?
那么，嗯…你是做什么的，罗斯玛丽？
So, what do you do for a living, Rosemary?
现在我在医院做志愿者
I’m actually volunteering at the hospital right now,
我一直在等着这个re-up来做
cos I’m waiting for this re-up thing to come through.
Re-up？什么，你在部队里？
Re-up? What, are you in the army?
和平队 – 和平队 哇。
Peace Corps. – Peace Corps. Wow.
你真太善良(altrudocious)了。
That’s very altrudocious of you.
“Altrudocious”？什么意思？
“Altrudocious”? That’s not a word.
哦！ 那么说有人道主义精神的，好吗？
Oh! You mean humanidocious, right?
好吧。 就算是吧。 – 好的。准备好点菜了吗？
Yeah. That’s the one. – All right. Ready to order?
是。嗯…
Yeah.
我可以点个双层比萨饼，奶酪红椒油饼 和一份大的巧克力牛奶混合饮料吗？
Can I get a double pizza burger, chili fries with cheese and a large chocolate milkshake?
好的。我也点一样的。
Nicely done. I’ll have the exact same thing.
好的
You got it.
我算见识了 看到一个女孩吃顿大餐
I am impressed. It’s nice to see a girl order a real meal.
我不喜欢你们就点一杯水 和一块烤碎面包片。
I hate it when you guys order a glass of water and a crouton.
这会破坏出来就餐的气氛。
It ruins the whole point of goin’ out.
那就是我想点的。
That’s probably what I should be ordering.
但是，我不明白，不管我怎么吃， 我的体重始终没变化。
But, I don’t know, no matter what I eat, my weightjust seems to stay the same.
于是，我就想，去他的。 我想吃就吃。
So I figure, what the hell? I’m gonna eat what I want.
总之 如果你越想逃避什么 往往适得其反。