恋恋书中人（2012）

你在这儿
There you are.
我一直在找你
I’ve been looking for you.
你看见我另一只鞋了吗
Have you seen my other shoe?
恋恋书中人
怎么了
What?
怎么了
What?
你干嘛这么看着我
Why are you looking at me like that?
尿尿去
Go potty.
斯科蒂
Scotty.
快点 哥们 斯科蒂
Come on, boy. Scotty.
尿啊 斯科蒂
Go potty, Scotty.
别这么看着我
Don’t look at me like that.
你好
Yes?
开始一天的好方法 不是吗
Great way to start the day, right?
我觉得我快吐了
I think I’m gonna puke.
妈妈说你上周约会来着 怎么样
Mom said you went on a date last week. How’d it go?
凑合
It was okay.
“凑合”是指上♥床♥了吗
“Okay” as in you got laid?
-哈利 -干嘛
– Harry. – What?
她听不见你说什么
She can’t hear you.
难道你下半辈子不想再做♥爱♥了吗
Don’t you wanna have sex, like, ever again in your life?
想啊 我只是觉得自己不适合约会
Yes. I just don’t think that I’m the dating type.
女孩们想和我上♥床♥
Girls only wanna sleep with me
只是因为她们高中时读过我的书
because they read my book in high school.
所以呢
So?
所以她们不是对我感兴趣
So they’re not interested in me.
而是对我的一些想法感兴趣
They’re interested in some idea of me.
所以你才要坚持锻炼
That’s why you should keep working out.
这样 她们就会往你身上扑了
That way, they’ll want you for your body.
练这个管什么用
what does this thing even do?
把你变得人见人爱
It turns you into a god.
继续练
Keep going.
我昨晚做了个怪梦
Hey, I had a weird dream last night.
梦见了个女孩
There was this girl and she was…
长什么样
What’d she look like?
就是个普通女孩 我想象出来的
Just a normal girl. Just a girl I made up.
好吧 她干什么了
Well, what happened?
她只是跟我说话
She just talked to me.
太没意思了
That’s depressing.
事实上 感觉很不错
Actually, it was really nice.
说真的 连梦里都没有姑娘跟你上♥床♥
Seriously? You don’t even get laid in your dreams? That’s,
这太悲哀了
That’s just sad.
那个 你的新书进展如何
Hey, how’s the new book coming along?
不知道 我有个新点子
I don’t know. I get a good idea,
我为什么不写写我的父亲
like why don’t I write about my dad?
可后来 我开始觉得
And then, bam, I start
这个主意太蠢了
thinking that it’s the stupidest thing ever.
谁想读什么
Who wants to read about,
“他对我失望”之类的
“He was disappointed in me, blah, blah, blah, blah”?
还有 我现在对斯科蒂是又爱又恨
Also, I’m feeling ambivalent about Scotty.
没错 他流口水 咬东西
Yeah, he slobbers. He chews things.
像个姑娘似的撒尿 这让我觉得别扭
He pees like a girl, which makes me feel inadequate.
他经常要出门放风
He needs to go outside a lot,
好好的一天全搅和了
breaks up my day.
所以我现在写不了
That’s why I’m not writing.
你觉得这是你现在写不出来的原因
Do you think that’s why you’re not writing?
-不是 -你为何觉得自己写不了
– No. – Why do you think you’re not writing?
能把波比给我吗
Can I have Bobby now?
-你现在想要波比 -是的
– Do you need Bobby now? – Yes.
卡尔文
Calvin,
你上次见朋友是什么时候
when’s the last time you saw a friend?
哈利 昨天
Harry. Yesterday.
不是 除了你哥哥之外的人
No, no. Someone other than your brother.
你把波比给过你其他病人吗
Uh, have you been giving Bobby to your other patients?
没 波比是你的专属玩具
No, Bobby is just for you.
-他闻着有点怪 -卡尔文
– Because he smells weird. – Calvin,
你当初决定要斯科蒂时 我们怎么说的
when you were deciding to get Scotty, what did we talk about?
你当初希望怎样来着 还记得吗
what did you say your hopes were? Do you remember?
他会帮我邂逅他人
That he would help me meet people.
大点声 好吗
A little louder, please?
他会很棒 我们能一起爬山什么的
That he would be awesome and we’d take hikes and stuff.
然后有人驻足逗他 我就能认识他们了
And people would stop to pet him, and I would meet them.
可是别人想逗他玩时斯科蒂就害怕
But Scotty gets scared when people try to pet him.
这使你尴尬吗
Does that embarrass you?
-没 -我想给你留个书面作业
– No. – I wanna give you a writing assignment.
-我写不出来 -这样
– I can’t write. – Okay.
你专门为我写
This would just be for me.
我想让你写一篇文章
I’d like you to write a page,
描写那些见到流着口水还怕生的斯科蒂
about someone who sees Scotty all slobbery and scared,
却依旧喜欢他的人
and likes him anyway, just the way he is.
你看你能为我写这个吗
You think you could do that for me?
写得不好行吗
Can it be bad?
再不好我都喜欢
I’d like it to be very bad.
售罄
我第一次见到卡尔文时他19岁
I first met Calvin when he was 19 years old.
那时他已经稳坐
And he’d already been at the top
纽♥约♥时♥报♥畅销书作家榜首
of The New York Times Best Seller list,
好几个月了
uh, for several months.
记得我当时在想
And I remember thinking,
“这是谁家的孩子”
“Who the fuck is this kid?”
“我怎么能倒转时光成为他那样呢”
And, uh, “How can I go back in time and be him?”
一个下巴上仍长青春痘的中学肄业青年
A high-school dropout with acne still on his chin,
带给我们极可能成为经典美国小说的作品
gave us what may very well become a classic American novel.
从那时起 我们都爱他的短篇小说
Since then, of course, we’ve all enjoyed his short stories,
还有去年的中篇小说 《早饭晚吃》
including last year’s novella, Breakfast for Dinner.
但只有当我坐下重新读他的小说
But it was only when I sat down and reread his novel,
现在出了10周年精♥装♥版
now available in a beautiful 10th anniversary edition,
我才意识到
that, uh, I realized
卡尔文是个多么优秀的作家
just how good a writer Calvin Weir-Fields is.
我们有他相伴实为幸事
We are lucky to have him around.
女士们先生们 有请卡尔文·维尔-菲尔兹
Ladies and gentlemen, Calvin Weir-Fields.
-有才 太有才了 -谢谢 谢谢
– Phenomenal, man. Just brilliant. – Thank you. Thanks.
-很棒 -多谢
– Brilliant. – Thanks so much.
-卡尔文 -你好
– Calvin. – Hi.
记得查理去妓院那章吗
You know that chapter where Charlie goes to the whorehouse?
你让妓♥女♥们穿蓝色
Did you dress the whores blue
是因为他妈妈的围裙是蓝的吗
because It’s the color of his mother’s apron?
抱歉
I’m sorry.
你怎么知道去哪里投稿
How did you know where to send your manuscript?
我查的
I looked it up.
哦 有道理
Oh, of course.
你曾经那么成功
Is it weird for you
现在想来会不会有点五味杂陈
that you used to be so successful?
你在这
There’s the man.
塞勒斯 你该提醒我这些事的
Cyrus, you gotta remind me about these things.
你得查看留言 伙计
You have to check your messages, buddy.
我该穿的像样点
I would’ve worn something nicer.
没人在意你穿什么 你是天才
No one cares what you’re wearing. You are a genius.
别这么说
Don’t use that word.
佩罗塔先生 看这里
Mr. Perrotta, over here.
-卡尔文一向很有天赋 -看这里
– Calvin always had talent. – Over here.
但可惜 还不够
But that, unfortunately, is not enough.
-兰登 这边 -我所做的
– Langdon, right here! – All I did,
只不过是给他指了条明路
really was guide him in the right direction and,
就像传递接力棒
uh, like, pass the baton.
玛贝尔
Mabel.
什么
what?
我叫玛贝尔
I’m Mabel.
-我认识你吗 -不认识
– Oh, do I know you? – No, no.
你想要我的电♥话♥号♥码吗
Do you want my number?
-这是本难得的好书 -好啊
– It’s a one-off, that book. – Great.