口袋里的小石头（2014）

他们知道敲哪扇窗 这让安娜感觉不舒服
The fact that they knew which window to knock on made Anna uneasy.
他们在监视我们的房♥子 安娜一边穿衣服 一边悄声对因杜利斯说
They are watching our house.She whispered to Indulis while quickly putting on her cloth.
安娜走出去 直直地走向畜棚
Anna walked out and went straight to the barn.
游击队跟着她
The partisans followed.
她把吃了幼兔的兔子拎出来
She pulled out the rabbit that had eaten her young out of the box
交给了游击队
and handed her to the partisans.
兔子绝望地蹬着腿
The rabbit was kicking her legs desperately,
好像在说她不想加入抵抗运动
as if she didn’t want to join the resistance movement.
你想让我们拿它怎么办？
What do you want me to do with this?
最老的游击队队员 靠在他破旧的猎枪上说
The oldest partisan asked, leaning on his shabby shotgun.
开枪打死它？不
Shoot it? No.
你划开它的脖子 剥了它的皮 然后把肉给我
You slit its throat, skin it,and give me the meat.
我们两个小时后回来
We’ll be back in two hours.
随后他拿出了一盒火柴
And he pulled out a box of matches
对着安娜晃了晃 威胁般地眨了眨眼
and shook it in front of Anna with a menace wink.
安娜点点头 然后官兵就走了
Anna nodded.The partisans left.
她回到了屋子里
She went back into the house.
因杜利斯 因为后背疼痛 这时才慢悠悠地穿上了外衣
Indulis, slowed by back pain, was only now putting his coat on.
我做不了这个 他说道
I can’t do it,He said.
我从来没有杀过任何东西 我帮你磨刀吧
I’ve never killed anything in my life.I’ll sharpen a knife for you.
安娜带着锋利的刀 返回了畜棚
With a knife as sharp as a razor blade, Anna returned to the barn.
不是你死就是我亡
It’s either you or me.
她对兔子说道
She told the rabbit.
没有任何迟疑 也不动一丝想法或感情
Without hesitation,so as not to allow a thought or feeling,
安娜一把抓住了兔子耳朵 把它举起来 迅速割开了它的喉咙
Anna took the rabbit by her ears,lifted her up and swiftly slit her throat.
兔子的腿挣扎几下 然后停止了
The rabbit’s legs kicked for a while, then the kicking stopped.
安娜看着血从喉咙里喷涌而出
Anna watched the blood stream out of the throat.
她的内心 升起一种冷酷麻木的感觉
Inside, she felt the callousness arise
紧紧盖住了自己那敏感的灵魂
and like a lid tightly cover the pot of her sensitive soul
不让任何情绪蒸发出来
kept the steam of emotion from pouring out.
现在生和死就是我要解决的事了
Life and death are my business now.
安娜想
Anna thought.
兔子死了 我的孩子就能活了
Rabbits die, my children live.
被生存的需要所驱动 安娜化解了自己对死的渴望
Mobilized by the need to survive, Anna dissolved her soul’s desire to die.
她要靠自己的身体让家人渡过艰难时期
Her physical self had to get her family through the difficult times.
经过血腥的战斗 俄♥国♥♥军♥队将德国人赶出了拉脱维亚
After violent battles, the Russian troops chased the Germans out of Latvia
又再一次恢复了苏联的管理模式
and reestablished Soviet order once again.
因杜利斯在和平时期的那个计划
Indulis’s plan from the good times,
关于生出十个孩子
the plan to produce ten offsprings
为拉托维亚的光荣独♥立♥做贡献的计划
who would contribute to the glory of independent Latvia
如今看起来十分荒谬
now seemed ridiculous.
拉脱维亚在苏联占领之下已经失去了独♥立♥
Independent Latvia had ceased to exist with the occupation of the Soviet union.
哪个男人会想让自己聪明的孩子
What man would want to support that evil empire
去效忠这样一个邪恶帝国？
with his talented children?
而且 他也已经精疲力竭了
Also, Indulis was running out of steam.
在生完第八个孩子后 性♥爱♥对他来说已经成了一种拉伸运动
After the eighth child, he started to regard sex as a straining exercise
他再也无法精力集中了
that he couldn’t master the spirit for.
他更喜欢利用晚上的时间独自写作
He preferred spending his evenings alone, writing.
但他过去的老计划
But the main reason his old plan
在人们看来显得十分荒谬 还有个主要原因
now seemed ridiculous to everyone observing
就是他的八个孩子现在几乎连生存都是问题
was that his eight offsprings were barely surviving.
四个瘦骨如柴的男孩 还有四个营养不良 十分苍白的小女孩
The four skinny little boys and four sickly looking malnourished girls,
他们都穿着兔皮制成的衣服
all dressed in rabbit skins,
在邻居看来 他们都是不幸的小鬼
were considered by neighbors as unfortunate runts
没有机会好好地长大成人了 因为这个家庭没有钱了
who wouldn’t have the chance to grow into fully developed adults.There was no money in the household!
战后不久 被苏联管理的松脂工厂就关门了
The Soviet runs turpentine factory stopped its work soon after the war,
因杜利斯收到了几卢布的津贴
Indulis received a pension, a few roubles,
就立刻交给了安娜用于补贴家用
which he promptly gave to Anna for domestic necessities.
他觉得 他对于这个家的投入 有这些钱就够了
He felt,as for his input to the household, that this was enough.
其余的时间 他都把自己锁在阁楼里进行写作
For the rest of the time he locked himself in the attic, writing away.
安娜毫不犹豫地想到要利用新制度
Anna had no scruples about using the new system to her advantage.
她去找当地的一位苏联政♥权♥代表
She went to a local Soviet representative
她告诉他作为八个孩子的母亲 她需要一头牛
and told him that as a mother of eight, she needed a cow.
苏联的生育率很低
The Soviet Union had a low reproduction rate.
对超过三个孩子的家庭 都会大加鼓励
Families who had more than three children were highly promoted.
尽管所有的牛
As all the cows
在苏联都是公有财产
of the Soviet Union were national property,
官员还是给了安娜一头邻居家的老牛
the official gave Anna a neighbor’s old cow.
从另一个邻居那里 她又得到了一匹马作为交通工具
From another neighbor, Anna was given a horse for transportation.
现在她又恢复了过去的生活
Now she was back to the business
从斜坡下抬水上来 喂养牛和马
of carrying water up the slope to the cow and horse.
尽管有了牛奶和兔肉 仍旧不能满足家里所需的食物
Still, even with the milk and rabbit meat, there was not enough food in the house.
安娜带着她的孩子来到森林里 教他们分辨
Anna took her children to the forest and taught them to gather
什么是可以食用的浆果 蘑菇 树皮 苔藓
whatever they are was available for food,berries, mushrooms, bark, moss.
孩子们对于掌握这些森林食物的知识感到很自豪
The children took pride in their knowledge of forest edibles.
谁也比不上他们分辨哪种牛肝菌能吃
No one was better at telling the right kind of boletus
哪种有毒的本领
from the poisonous kind.
也没有别人知道有一种毒蘑菇
No one else knew that a certain kind of toxic mushroom
在沸水中煮3分34秒之后就可以食用
was edible after exactly 3 minutes 34 seconds of boiling.
这些知识 让安娜的孩子们好似掌握了一种隐秘的能力
This knowledge gave Anna’s children a sense of a secret power,
这是邻居们所看不到的
not visible to neighbors who only saw
他们只看见苍白脏乱 瘦骨嶙峋的孩子 穿着兔皮做的丑陋衣服
pale, dirty, skinny kids wearing hideous rabbit hides,
拿着一堆没用的树枝出没于森林
carrying a bunch of useless twigs out of the forest.
安娜利用孩子们对森林知识的自豪感
Anna used her children’s pride in their knowledge of the forest
又鼓励他们去接受另一种教育
to promote another kind of education.
好好学习
Study well.
她在孩子们去上小学的时候对他们说
She told them when they went to primary school.
知识可以带你们去另一边土地 那里的河水中都流淌着牛奶
Education will bring you to the land where rivers are filled with milk,
河堤是用面包做成的 树上还长着蛋糕
their banks are made of bread and cakes grow on trees.
她想让她的孩子取得成功
She wanted her children to succeed.
在森林中学到的知识 给予了他们自力更生的能力
The knowledge of the forest gave them the opportunity to be self-reliant.
书本的知识 给予了他们征服世界的机会
The knowledge of the books gave them a opportunity to conquer the world.
而同时也给了她解放自己的机会
But it also gave her an opportunity to free herself.
苏联的学校是完全免费的
Soviet schools were free for all,
这是最完美的方法
a perfect way to get rid of another mouth
让家中减少又一张饥饿的嘴
demanding food at the family table.
安娜将孩子们一个接一个的送出家门
One after another, Anna pushed her children out of the nest
到远方的寄宿学校去
to far-away boarding schools.
守着空荡荡的家
With the house empty,
那种压制她情感的冷酷麻木开始一点点消散
The callousness that had covered her feelings started to peel off.
他们的坟墓旁边 生长着一颗垂柳
There is a weeping willow leaning over their grave.
他们间隔3年相继去世 先是因杜利斯 死于79岁
They died 3 years apart,First,Indulis died at age 79.
三年之后是安娜 死于50岁
Then Anna, at age 50.
他很幸运 活了那么长岁数
He was lucky to live so long.
但50岁的安娜 死得有点为之过早
But 50 seems a bit premature.
你的母亲死于什么原因？我问我的父亲
What did your mother die of? I ask my father.
（第五个孩子 奥古斯特）
医生可能会问你这样的问题
A doctor might ask you this kind of question.
你的家人里有人得过溃疡吗
Has anyone in your family had ulcers?
你的家人有得过癌症的吗
Has anyone in your family had cancer?
你吸烟吗
Do you smoke?
吸烟是一个很好的选择
Smoking is a choice one makes,
但家里有过皮肤癌病史 那就是万万不行的
but having skin cancer run in your family is certainly not.
如果你知道该去哪找的话 你就能抓住你的敌人
You catch your enemy if you know where to look for it.
在卫生间里
In the bathroom
我在冲水之前观察自己的排泄物
I look at my evacuated fecal matter before flushing
然后问道 我奶奶是因为什么去世的？
and ask: What did my grandmother die of?
我爸爸的回答很模糊
My father’s answer is vague.
她是在睡觉的时候就停止心跳了
Her heart just stopped beating in her sleep.
你是知道的 她的心脏一直不好 心脏不好
She had a weak heart, you see. A weak heart!
我真想说 一个心脏不好的人怎么可能
Can I point out that no one with a weak heart would be able to
每天从斜坡下的小河里抬四十桶水回家？
carry 40 buckets of water up a day that slope from the river to the house.
不过我还可以去问她的其他七个孩子
But there are seven more of her children I can ask.
（第三个孩子 黛安娜）
她就是累死的
She was just worn out,
日复一日地挑着那些满满的水桶
carrying all those buckets full of water day after day.
那天晚上 她急忙要赶在暴风雨之前把干草抬进谷仓
That night she had to hurry to get the hay into the barn before storm.
干完之后 她就回来躺下了
Afterwards, she just lay down,
她就是因为过度劳累 在睡眠中死去了
and she died in her sleep out of sheer exhaustion.
好吧
Right.
就是说当你很累的时候 最好不要睡觉
When you are very tired, you better not fall asleep.