流浪者：一部关于安东尼·波登的电影（2021）

我的两个孩子都拥抱了我。
And, um, both my kids sort of embraced me.
我儿子说”托尼是怎么死的”
My son, he’s like, “how did Tony die?”
我说，“呃，我…我们不知道。”
And I was like, “uh, I… we don’t know.”
对吧?
Right?
大约20秒过去了，他看着我说，“我真的很想知道托尼是怎么死的。”
About 20 seconds pass, and he looked at me and he’s like, “I really would like to know how Tony died.”
我跟我七岁的孩子聊了一小时托尼的事。
I have this like hour-long conversation about Tony to my fucking seven-year-old kid.
我说，我觉得托尼，最后，觉得很孤独，觉得他无法向任何人诉说他内心的痛苦
And I said, “I think Tony, at the end, “felt alone and felt he couldn’t talk to anybody about the pain that was going on inside of him.”
我说:“你知道，你总有可以倾诉的人。”
And I said, “you know you always have someone to turn to and talk to.”
这就是我从中得到的教训。
That’s the lesson in it for me.
只说我受伤了就够了。
It’s plenty to just say I’m hurt.
我已经两年没工作了。
I haven’t worked for two years now.
快到最后的时候，我们谈了一下，我说，”带着我们的女儿们，减轻她们的负担”向她们展示这个世界，向她们展示我们是谁，不仅仅是你回家的时候，而是…”
Really close to the end, we talked, and I said, “got to take our girls and lighten the load “and show them the world, show them who we are, not just when you come home, but…”
我们对这个前景都很兴奋。
And-and we were both excited about this prospect.
他妈的。
Fuck.
一个,两个,三个。
One, two, three.
当我生气的时候，我想到的是留下一个辉煌的…的女儿。
When I get angry is when I think about leaving behind a brilliant… Daughter.
你知道的。
You know.
他很想现在就在她身边，见到她。
He would have loved to be around now, to see her now.
他会为她感到骄傲的。
He’d be so proud of her.
我很幸运，因为她是我能想到的最好的女儿。
I’m so lucky ’cause she’s the best daughter I-I could hope for.
我永远都很感激，你知道的，托尼把她给了我?
And I will always be grateful that, you know, Tony gave her to me, you know?
我是说，我想这是我最后一次公开谈论它，因为我…这不是我想记住的他的样子。
I mean, I think this is the last time I’ll ever talk publicly about it, because I… that’s not the way I want to remember him.
我想记住我们在一起时的他，我们做过的所有了不起的事，他是一个了不起的人。
I want to remember him when we were together, all the amazing things that we’d done and the amazing person that he was.
托尼死后，莱斯·哈勒斯餐厅，就成了圣地。
After Tony died, the restaurant, les halles, it just became this shrine.
我们不知道他对那么多人有那么重要。
We didn’t realize he meant so much to so many people.
“你激励我走出自己的舒适区，无畏地沉浸在丰富的生活中。”
“You inspired me to get out of my comfort zone and fearlessly immerse myself in the richness of life.”
支持工人阶级，移♥民♥，穷♥人♥。
“Advocate for the working classes, “the immigrants, the poor.
这个世界配不上你。”
This world didn’t deserve you.”
还有一些人留下了诗。
And then a few people left poems.
一个人说:“大家都忘了伊卡洛斯也飞过。”
“One said,” everyone forgets that icarus also flew.
“我相信伊卡洛斯并没有失败，因为他倒下了，而只是即将结束他的胜利。”
“I believe icarus was not failing as he fell but just coming to the end of his triumph.”
你知道，我当时是个愤怒的年轻人。
You know, I was an angry young man.
我,呃…我都忘了我为什么生气了，尤其是看着这个。
I-I, uh… I forget what I was angry about, especially looking at this.
我到底为什么那么生气?
What the hell was I so angry about?
这是，你知道…天堂。
This was, you know… paradise.
对不起。
Sorry.
我能说句话吗?
Can I say something?
看着他在沙滩上散步，很有共鸣，很甜蜜。
To have him walking down a beach, it resonates, it’s sweet.
然后我就去了，你知道，我在楼上上厕所，我就像…“他会讨厌的。”
And I go, you know, as-as I was upstairs using the restroom, I was like… “He would fucking hate that.”
带着荣耀之光出去真是太差劲了。
Going out in a Blaze of glory was so fucking lame.
但我们生活在这样一个社会里，每个自杀的伟大艺术家都被画在壁画上，他们被当作神来谈论。
But we live in this society where every great artist who kills themselves is on murals and they’re talked about like gods.
-托尼在壁画上。-是的。这是……在镇上，就有几个。
– Tony’s on murals. – Yeah. That’s… Around town, there are a couple of them.
我该去涂鸦了。
I should go deface them.
如果我这么做，他会很高兴的。
He would love it if I did that.
我收到了你的书面邀请
♪ I got your written invitation ♪
♬一根漂亮的棍子打在♬的眼里
♪ a beautiful stick in the eye ♪
我明白了
♪ I get the message ♪
你一直在发送
♪ you been sending ♪
♪说再见♪是没有用的
♪ ain’t no good in goodbye ♪
♪扔掉一切♪
♪ throw everything away ♪
任何东西都可以被取代
♪ anything can be replaced ♪
♬遍体鳞伤是我唯一能做到的…♪
♪ black and blue is the best I can do… ♪
哦。
Ooh.
是的。
Yeah.
♪想吗?♪
♪ Want to? ♪
哦，多么痛苦的asp
♪ Oh, what a pain in the asp ♪
♪无尽的爱与奉献
♪ endless love and devotion ♪
♪印度过去的礼物♪
♪ Indian gifts of the past ♪
♪只是沧海一粟罢了
♪ just another drop on the ocean ♪
♪空了空间，空了心
♪ empty space, empty heart ♪
♪哪里有爱♪
♪ where the love ♪
♪不再是♪了
♪ is not anymore ♪
这样♪♪
♪ so ♪
♬生活在地狱的边缘
♪ Living in limbo ♪
♬亲吻♬的腰
♪ kisses akimbo ♪
每一座桥都着火了
♪ every single bridge is on fire ♪
♪把我抱在一起?♪
♪ hold me together? ♪
没有可能，从来没有
♪ No way, never ♪
到期日期已过期
♪ due date done expired ♪
♪第二次机会是浪费♪
♪ second chances are a waste ♪
♪我要屈服，直到我击垮♪
♪ I’m gonna bend until I break ♪
遍体鳞伤是我能做到的最好
♪ black and blue is the best I can do ♪
是的，青一块紫一块碎成两半
♪ yeah, black and blue and broken in two ♪
♬喔，喔♬
♪ whoa, whoa ♪
♪想?♪
♪ want to? ♪