哈啦上路（2000）

你啊，对
你住嘴，发生了什么事？
– Oh, yeah.
– Shut up. What happened?
不可能！你在撒谎
No way! You’re lying.
我没有撒谎
I’m not lying.
你不能只应付了人家
可假装上了床
You can’t make out with someone
then pretend you had sex.
你这不够潇洒
你我没有撒谎
– That’s really uncool.
– I’m not pretending.
算了吧，我知道你在撒谎
我敢肯定
Forget it. I know you’re lying.
I guarantee it.
要打赌吗？
You wanna bet?
好，我打赌，你没有证据
Great. I’m gonna bet
on something you can’t prove.
你录下来了！
You videotaped it!
不，我没有，给我！给我！
No, no, no, I didn’t!
Gimme that! Gimme that!
你不给，这太棒了
你我在开玩笑！
– No way! This is amazing!
– I was kidding, I was kidding!
把录像带给我
嗯？来吧
– Gimme the tape.
– Huh? Come on.
我们迟早会看到的
他说得对
– We’re gonna see it sooner or later.
– He’s got a point.
不，不，不！
Oh-ho! Oh, no! Oh, no!
给我，不，把它给我
Give it to me. No, give it to me.
-EL，不
乔希，别，我们需要它
– EL, no.
– Josh, please? We need this.
好，听着，你们别告诉其他人
OK, listen, seriously.
You can’t tell anyone you saw this.
啊，好
Oh, yeah.
行，行！
OK. OK!
巴里，拉上窗帘
Barry, hit the lights.
是娱乐的时间了
It’s boner time!
渧，这是我从艾菲嘉直播
‘Hey, Tif. It’s me
coming to you live from Ithaca.’
我不是叫你昨天寄出了吗？
I thought I asked you
to mail this yesterday?
对，你说了，我今天寄出了
Yeah, you did. I mailed it today.
快速进到精彩部份
Fast-forward to the horny stuff.
你把这个寄给渧芬妮了吗？
Is this the shit
you’ve been sending Tiffany?
啊，上帝
Oh, my God.
是你…
# It’s you… #
啊，他妈的！
Oh, fuck!
啊，上帝，不，不，不
Oh, my God! No, no, no, no.
啊，上帝！
Oh, God!
等一等
W-wait a second.
你把贝思的带子寄给渧芬妮了
Tell me you mailed
the Beth tape to Tiffany.
是啊！
Yes!
混♥蛋♥！啊！不，不！
Shit! Oh, no! Oh, no!
嗨，嗨
Hey, hey.
你有没有复♥制♥盘？
Did you make a copy?
有的话，我们可以看看
If you made a copy,
we could watch the copy.
别接！
Don’t answer it!
嗨，这是乔希和鲁宾，请留言
(Answer machine ) ‘Hey, it’s
Josh and Rubin. Leave a message.’
嗨！乔希，这是渧芬妮
‘Hi, Josh. It’s Tiffany.
抱歉没跟你通话
‘Sorry we haven’t spoken.
我外公去世了
‘Listen, my grandfather passed away.
我打过几次电♥话♥了，都没人接
‘I’ve tried calling you
a few times, but no one picked up.
我不想留这样的言给你
‘I didn’t want to leave
this message on your machine
但现在你可能会着急了…
‘but by now you’re probably
a little worried so…
现在我在家里帮助我妈
‘Anyway, I’m at my parents’
house helping my mom.
她很伤心
‘She’s really a wreck.
如果联♥系♥不上
我星期一再来电♥话♥
‘If I don’t speak with you,
I’ll call Monday.
我没事儿，只需要点儿时间
‘I’ll be OK. I just need some time.
再见，我爱你
‘Bye. I love you.’
这不公平
That’s not fair.
她有带子看而我们却看不到
How come she gets to see the tape
and we don’t?
她星期一回校
我有三天的时间赶去
She gets back there Monday.
That leaves three days to get there.
去哪儿？奥斯丁？
Get where? Austin?
你到那儿有一万英里
你一千八百
– That’s like 10,000 miles from here.
– 1,800.
三天赶一千八百英里？飞吧
You wanna drive 1,800 miles
in three days? Just fly.
你有钱买♥♥机票吗？我没有
Do you have money for a ticket?
I don’t.
那好，我们开车
你去吗？
– All right, so we’re driving.
– You’re coming?
我留下来干什么？学习？
What else am I gonna do,
stay here and learn?
开车上路
Road trip.
等等，等一下儿
(Behind door) Just a minute. Hold on.
他可能在自渎
He’s probably jackin’ off.
你们想干什么？
What do you guys want?
凯尔，这是紧急情况
Kyle, this is an emergency.
等等，至少让我回去
打电♥话♥给我爸爸
Wait. Let me at least
go back and call my dad.
打电♥话♥给你♥爸♥爸？
你自己没主见？
Call your dad?
Would you listen to yourself?
你十九岁了！
怎么还他妈的娘娘腔？
You’re 19 years old,
and you’re a fucking sissy.
只知道坐在图书馆猜迷
All you ever do is sit
in a library and play Myst.
这真可怜
It’s pathetic.
他是说这是你做大事的好机会
He’s trying to say that
this is your chance to do something.
去冒险吧，跟我们一起去
Be a risk-taker. Come with us.
你们这样说，不过是要我的车
You’re just saying that
because you want my car.
不，我们一直都很喜欢你
No! No, we’ve always liked you.
或把车借给我们，这也是冒险
Or just give us the car.
That would make him a risk-taker.
闭嘴，行吗？他也一起去
Shut up, all right?
He’s coming with us.
来呀，凯尔，会非常好玩
Come on, Kyle. It’ll be fun!
你不想知道我们去哪儿吗？
Aren’t you even curious
where we’re going?
不想
No.
我们去奥斯丁大学
你不想去吗？
OK, we’re going to the University
of Austin. Sure you won’t come?
我不喜欢麻省
I don’t like Massachusetts.
奥斯丁在德州，波士顿在麻省
Austin’s in Texas.
You’re thinking of Boston.
你从未离开这个城市，对吧？
You’ve never left this town,
have you?
没有
No, not really.
这样会憋出恐惧症的
That could turn
into a debilitating phobia.
好吧
OK.
我可以喂米切吗？
是的，你当然可以
– Can I feed Mitch?
– Yes, actually you can.
笼子旁边有个装老鼠的灰盒子
There’s a brown box of mice
by his cage.
明天给它一只，就一只
Give him one tomorrow. Just one.
我明天喂它一只老鼠
好
– I’ll feed him a mouse tomorrow.
– OK.
你可以信任我，我很可靠
You can count on me.
OK? I’m reliable. OK?
你们一路顺风，安全愉快
You guys do good.
Have a good trip, safe trip.
扣好安全带，我明天喂蛇
Buckle up your seat belt.
I’m gonna feed the snake!
我明天喂蛇，照顾蛇
I’ll feed the snake,
I’ll watch the snake.
这样他们就出发了
(Barry ) ‘So off they went.’
三日里要赶一千八百英里
They had 1,800 miles to go,
and only three days to do it.