让他们的搭档来猜
Wait, what are you doing? The charades thing is the only fun part!
等一下，你干嘛？ 比手画脚是唯一好玩的部分
It’s not fun, it’s a cheap gimmick.
才不好玩，这是一个廉价的噱头
They changed the entire final round to boost ratings, it’s so dumb.
为了提高收视率 他们改变了整个最后一轮 太愚蠢了
Who wants to watch people embarrass themselves?
谁想看人让自己难堪？
I do.
我想
Waltz. Waltzer.
华尔兹，华特
Oh, my God. He’s dancing.
天啊，他在跳舞
Sidewalk. Concrete.
人行道，克瑞特
Waltzer. Concrete… Walter Cronkite.
华特、克瑞特… 华特克朗凯
(罗恩队一分)
Who’s Walter Cronkite?
华特克朗凯是谁啊？
G. Dog.
G，狗
(我去工作了，下午五点前回来)
(把头发打扫干净)
♪ Okay ♪
♪ Show up to the party it’s guerrilla ♪
♪ With an itty bitty chance of having a good time ♪
♪ Sip, sip, sippin’ margaritas spillin’ like a villain… ♪
It’s like a robot’s house.
根本就是机器人住的地方
♪ Better whip out the swiffer hiding my mind, smoke away depression ♪
♪ Look like my exes ♪ – ♪ Hey ♪
♪ They good, they tight ♪
♪ They pull me under… ♪
I focus on my destiny all the time.
我始终关注着自己的宿命
I want to be rich and famous, and loved by everybody. Why?
我想变得有钱有名 并受到大家的喜爱 为什么？
Because I want to be a powerful force for good in this world, you know?
因为我想成为这个世界 积极向善的强大力量
I just haven’t found, you know, the path to get there yet.
只是我还没找到正确的道路
I mean, do you have any idea
你知道
how hard it is to be an Asian woman in this country?
这个国家的亚裔女性活得多辛苦吗？
Yes, I read an article. – Like, we have to keep going.
我知道，我看过一篇文章 – 我们必须继续前进
Like, I’ve always wanted to open my own bakery, you know?
我一直想开一间自己的烘焙坊
And then life got in the way.
然后生活阻挡了梦想
And now, I never bake anymore,
现在，我再也不烘焙了
and I feel so unfulfilled.
我感到很不得志
You need to change your life.
你必须改变生活
You can because you’re strong.
你行的，因为你很坚强
So, are you done with your plate?
你吃完了吗？
Oh, yeah.
吃完了
Since when does it take you 20 minutes to service one table?
从什么时候开始 服务一桌客人要20分钟了？
We started talking.
我们聊了一下
You can’t just sit and hang out. – She believes in me, Carl.
你不能坐着闲聊 – 她相信我
Oh, my God!
天啊
Thanks!
谢啦
Hi. I had a huge day.
我今天过得非常充实
Why are you sitting out here? – Oh, I locked myself out.
你为什么坐在外面？ – 我把自己锁在外面了
Well, let’s get inside before… – Anne, is this lunatic your sister?
先进去再说… – 安妮，这个疯子是你姐姐？
I told you.
我告诉过你了
She threatened to call the cops because she thought I was, what?
她威胁要报♥警♥，因为她认为我在…
Was it loitering? – You were loitering.
无故徘徊？ – 你是在无故徘徊
I thought you were loitering with an intent to murder.
我以为你无故徘徊，意图谋杀
Oh, do I look like a murderer?
我看起来像杀手吗？
Yes. Well, yes, you do. – Oh, really?
是啊，很像 – 是吗？
I can see your brassiere. – Okay, okay. I’m… I’m sorry about her.
你的胸罩露出来了 – 好，我为她道歉
Like… – Sorry about me? What did I do?
就像… – 为我道歉？我做错什么？
Why are you… Why? – Put a sock in it.
为什么你要道歉？ – 别再吵了
Okay, so, I went to go get coffee and I met this woman.
我去喝咖啡，遇到了一个女人
Oh, my God! She was so sad. But we got to talking, and I helped her.
天啊 她很难过 但我们开始聊天 我帮助了她
And helping her made me feel better.
帮助她让我感觉更好了
And just like that, I saw it. I saw the path forward.
就这样 我明白了 我看到了通往前方的道路
Don’t move my stuff.
别乱动我的东西
Why do you have a bobblehead of Justin Timberlake?
你怎么会有 贾斯汀·汀布莱克的摇头娃娃？
It’s Terry McTeer, and it’s limited edition.
是泰瑞·麦克蒂尔，限♥量♥版的
It’s from the 300th episode!
是第300集出的
Do you know the heated eBay war I had to endure to get that?
你知道我有多辛苦 才在网上拍下它吗？
It’s Justin Timberlake. – It’s Terry McTeer.
这是贾斯汀·汀布莱克 – 是泰瑞·麦克蒂尔
Okay, as I was saying, I have decided
好，就像我刚说的，我决定了
I am going to become…
我要成为
a life coach.
生活教练
You know, like Oprah. – Oh, yeah. Yes. Linguini!
就像欧普拉 – 是哦，很好，小扁豆
What’s so funny? This is my destiny. – Oh, there you are.
有什么好笑？这是我的宿命 – 找到你了
Yeah, you and your destinies.
对啦，你和你的宿命
First, it was figure skating, then it was acting, and then…
首先是花样滑冰 然后是演戏 接着…
And then you wanted to be a music icon.
接着你想当音乐明星
And then it was fashion design. – Yeah, but this is different.
之后是时装设计 – 对，但这次不一样
How?
怎么不一样？
I’ll show you, you know what? Because you’re gonna be my first project.
我会证明给你看 因为你就是我的第一个客户
I don’t need a life coach.
我不需要生活教练
Uh, really? Because from what I can tell,
是吗？因为就我看来
you’re like a 28-year-old woman, living the life of a 98-year-old widower.
你就像一个28岁的女人 过着98岁鳏夫的生活
I’m 33.
我33岁
And why am I always a man in your hypotheticals?
而且为什么在你的假设中 我总是个男人？
Because men are worse.
因为男人比较糟糕
Well, I like my life just the way it is.
我喜欢现在的生活
Okay, Ron. Chuck has chosen geography. Let’s see what we have for you.
罗恩，查克选择了地理 让我们看看你的题目是什么
Please list for us… – What are you doing?
请列出… – 你在干嘛？
South American capital cities. – Yoga.
南美国家的首都 – 做瑜伽
Buenos Aires, Lima, Sucre, Brasília, Santiago, Bogotá, Quito, Caracas,
布宜诺斯艾利斯、利马、苏克雷、巴西利亚、圣地亚哥、波哥大、基多、加拉加斯
Montevideo, Asunción. – Caracas…
蒙得维的亚、亚松森 – 加拉加…
I knew I should have paid more attention when I backpacked through South America
我法学院毕业，去南美洲当背包客时
after I graduated law school.
应该多留意一下这些首都
Darn it.
可恶
Let’s see, Chuck, it’s your turn. How about language?
查克，轮到你了，选语言如何？
Chuck, please list for us nouns that do not have a singular form.
查克 请为我们列出 没有单数形式的英文名词
Scissors, clothes, pants, jeans, trousers, shorts, tights, goggles, sunglasses,
剪刀、衣服、裤子、牛仔裤、西装裤、短裤、紧身裤、护目镜、太阳眼镜
tweezers, belongings, boxers, briefs.
镊子、随身物品、四角裤、三角裤
North American river borders. All right, okay.
北美洲河流边界，好
Detroit, Pine, Pigeon, Rainy.
底特律河、派恩河、鸽子河、雷尼河
Saint Clair, Saint Croix, Saint Francis, Saint Lawrence, Saint Mary’s.
圣克莱尔河、圣克劳河、圣玛丽河、圣弗朗西斯河、圣劳伦斯河
Nucleus, nucleolus, mitochondria, Golgi complex, cell membrane,
细胞核、核仁、粒线体、高基体、细胞膜
nuclear envelope, cytoskeleton.
核膜、细胞骨架
Did you see it? I was like, “Don’t we work with that girl?”
你看过了吗？ 我心想“这不是我们同事吗？
And I was like, “Oh, my God. Yes, I do.”
天啊，的确是
And then I was… Oh, my God!
然后我…天啊
Hey, it’s the Quiz Lady. – What?
嗨，问答女王来了 – 什么？
You were like, “Spain. Killer whale. Octagon.”
你就像这样 “西班牙、 杀人鲸、八角形”
So, what are you talking about? – Hello!
你在说什么啊？ – 别装了
You’re on the front page of Reddit. Your video.
你上了Reddit的首页 你的视频
outskirts, premises, surroundings.
郊区、物业、周围环境
(问答女王的视频)
(死狗作伴 女子轻松碾压问答测验)
(怪老头答对所有快问快答)
Oh, no.
哦 不
(问答女王是美国问题的缩影)
Oh, Quiz Lady.
问答女王
(《问答不能停》，专家篇)
Oh, my God.
天啊
Lysosomes, ribosomes, nucleus… – Oh, no.
溶酶体、核醣体、细胞核… – 糟了
(本日短片)
Yo, what up fam? As promised, The Quiz Lady.
你们好吗 如我所答应的问答女王在这里
Yo, that video was so funny, dude. I dropped my phone in the toilet.
那个视频太好笑了 我甚至把手♥机♥掉到马桶
Don’t worry, just pee.
别担心，只是在尿尿
Can you give me, like, a quick “wassup” to my followers?
可以跟关注我的人打个招呼吗？
No! I need a minute.
不行，我要一个人静一下
Hi, have you seen Twitter? – How did this happen?
看过推特了吗？ – 怎么会这样？
You are viral!
你爆红了
I posted it last night,
我昨晚贴文
and then when I woke up this morning it was everywhere.
今天早上就传遍世界了
I mean, I have a ton of followers from that time Elon Musk yelled at me.
因为那次埃隆·马斯克对我大吼 让许多人追踪我
But… – Delete… Delete it right now.
可是… – 马上删掉
Wait! You cannot buy this hype. Get this, get this!
等一下，这种热度买♥♥都买♥♥不到，听好
Okay, the producers… – I have to go.
制♥作♥人… – 我要挂了
I’m still here. – She always does this.
我还在这里 – 她一直都这样
She just floats through life without ever thinking
她漫无目的地过着生活
about how her actions affect other people.
从没想过自己的行为对别人有何影响
Did you know that when were kids we went to the Heinz Ketchup Museum,
小时候我们去了亨氏番茄酱博物馆
our father brought us there, and she was furious
老爸带我们去的，她非常愤怒
’cause she wanted to watch Supercop 3, and she’d just gotten it on DVD.
因为她想看刚拿到的 《警♥察♥故事3》DVD
And, so, she knocks over an entire display of ketchup
所以她踢倒所有展示的番茄酱