噢，该死
Oh, crap.
操
Shit.
哎哟 – 嘿，我正在想今晚的安排呢
Oh, God.- Hey, thinking about tonight.
要不我们别出去了吧？
Why don’t we just stay in?
宅在家里，聊聊生活？
Hang out and talk about life, you know?
听上去挺别致的，但我妹妹今晚要办个订婚宴
Sounds refreshing, but I have my sister’s engagement thing tonight.
那可太棒了，我要去！我会准时到的
Oh, hell yeah, I’m in! I’ll be there.
噢不…这算是我们的家务事
Oh, no. No, it’s… it’s family stuff,
所以你完全可以不来，别强迫自己
so you could totally be out if you wanted to.
好吧妮可，听着…我觉得我们得好好聊聊
Okay, listen, Nicole, uh, I actually think that we need to talk.
行啊，我们现在不就聊着吗？我不…
Okay, aren’t we currently talking right now? I don’t…
你现在整个人都很孤僻
You are completely shut off.
我才没有
I’m not.
我哪里孤僻了
I am not shut off. I don’t know.
我感觉你已经失去爱的能力了
I feel like you’re incapable of loving anyone.
黑伊姆，我们能不能…
Chaim, can we just, like…
你连我名字都叫错了，是哈伊姆
That’s not even my name. It’s Chaim.
好吧，黑伊姆
Okay, Chaim.
哈伊姆 – 黑伊姆
Chaim! -Chaim.
是哈伊姆！
Chaim!
我就是这么说的啊，好吧，对不起咯
I’m saying that. Look, I’m sorry.
请把车开到下一个服务窗口
Pull up to the next window.
老妈
嘿，亲爱的
Hey, sweetie.
燕麦拿铁？ – 对
Latte with oat? -Yeah.
那是女孩子的声音吗？哇哦…
Is that a girl? Oh, my…
不是，我没有… – 你跟她共度良宵了吗？
No. I’m not… It’s… -Did she spend the night?
我在“得来速”买♥♥东西，先挂了 – 她可爱吗？
I’m at a drive-thru. Goodbye, goodbye. -Is she cute?
您的拿铁 – 噢，谢谢你
Um, here you go. -Oh, thank you.
谢谢 – 没事
Thank you. -Yeah.
先简单消毒一下
Just a quick sanitize.
“我是KCLW”
This is KCLW,
“您现在收听的是西雅图‘放松一刻’广播电台”
and you’re listening to We Chill Radio Station in Seattle.
“接下来要播放的，是一首能让你放松心情的歌♥曲”
Next up, we have a track that will ease your mind
“用沉思来开启你早晨的美好时光…”
and kick-start your morning with some meditative…
我有一次还跟你分享了我做的梦
There was that one time where I was telling you about a dream that I had.
噢，我的润唇膏
Oh. My lip balm.
你从来都不跟我说你做过的梦
You don’t even talk to me about your dreams.
“又是美妙的一天”
And it’s another pleasant day.
操！无人驾驶？
Fuck! What the fuck?
… 你也不跟我分享情感上的… – 捡到了
…and to share an emotional… -Got it.
我谢谢你
Thank you.
“届时会有6万粉丝到场为他们加油”
60,000 fans will be there to cheer them on.
“欢迎开始您的引导冥想体验”
Welcome to your guided meditation experience.
“在我们开始之前，务必要提醒自己，此时此刻…”
Before we begin, remind yourself that this is a time…
好，我可以的 – “…就是属于你的个人时光”
Okay, I can do it. -…for you and you alone.
我只需要走进办公室
I’m just gonna walk into the office
不要做出奇怪的行为
and not be weird.
“放松你的肩颈” – 那些人我都认识的
Relax your neck and shoulders. -They’re just people that I actually know.
“用你的鼻子深吸一口气…”
Deepen your breath in through the nose…
好 – “…再从嘴巴吐出来”
Okay. -…and out through the mouth.
人真的好烦啊，烦死了
I hate people. I hate people.
知道啦，真是服了
Yeah. God.
我知道了！
Yeah, okay!
让你的意识逐渐下沉…
And travel your consciousness down…
好的
Okay.
吓我一跳…
God…
希德
老兄，你这有点离谱啊
Bro, this is getting ridiculous.
我原本都打算进去了
I was planning on coming in.
结果…我叔叔有事…进医院了
It’s just, my uncle’s in the hospital with, um, a thing.
然后就… – 你真是个大骗子，麦克斯
And, um…-You’re such a liar, Max.
都有人看到你在公♥司♥外面了
Someone already saw you outside.
我现在就透过窗户盯着你看呢…
And I’m looking at you from my window right now…
跟变♥态♥一样绕着停车场打转
circling the parking lot looking like a freak.
看上去就像驾校的教练车
Look like a student driver, bro.
我…
I…
听着，我知道现在的日子不好过
Look, I know things are rough,
但是… – 你不…
man, but… -You don’t…
你还好吗？
Are you okay?
我没法解释，好吗？我就是…我…我也不知道怎么说
I can’t explain it, okay? I just… I… I don’t know.
我是说，我…我的…
I mean, my… my…
我的心脏跳得飞快，我…我现在浑身是汗
my heart’s beating really fast, and I’m… I’m sweating,
我…就是…
and I just, um… It’s just…
你还真是充分利用了我在疫情后实行的
You are really taking advantage of my post-COVID,
高度自♥由♥的居家办公政策啊
very liberal work-from-home policy.
希德，这事不是开玩笑的 – 我知道，社交焦虑症是真实存在的
This is a real condition, Sid. Okay? -I know, social anxiety is real.
我很同情你，我看过相关的科普广♥告♥
I feel for you, dawg. I seen the commercials.
你得赶紧调整过来，因为我没法再护着你了
You gotta snap that shit quick, ’cause I can’t protect you anymore.
你会被解雇的
You’re gonna get canned.
我做不到，我做不到
I can’t do it. I can’t do it.
我要去找我的心理治疗师聊聊
I’m going to talk to my fucking therapist.
我又翘班了
I blew off the office. Again.
我成功买♥♥到了咖啡
I did go get coffee,
但是…是在得来速买♥♥的
but, um, it was the… it was the drive-thru.
抱歉 – 你没有必要道歉，麦克斯
Sorry. -No need to apologize, Max.
我知道，我只是…感觉自己是个无可救药的白♥痴♥
Yeah. No, no, I know. I just… You know, I just feel like a helpless idiot.
我不听无可救药的白♥痴♥废话
Well, I don’t listen to helpless idiots.
额…
Uh…
你是我的治疗师，所以你得听啊…
you’re my therapist, so…
注：镜映：在心理咨♥询♥师和来访者之间，咨♥询♥师的工作内容之一就是提供一面心灵的镜子，
中立、温和、不带评价地映照出来访者的样子，并通过语言和非语言的方式，反馈给来访者：“我看到你是…”
以促进来访者去体验和探索被映照出的自己。
这叫镜映
It’s called mirroring.
是一种治疗手段 – 噢
It’s a therapy technique. -Oh.
可以让你知道 你是如何评价自己的
Shows you how you talk about yourself.
哇哦，这…这还挺厉害的…
Oh, wow, that’s… that’s cool. Um…
那这…这样会有帮助吗？
And that… that’s supposed to help?
基本没有
Rarely.
也许是时候介绍一些不同的治疗方法了
Perhaps now it’s time to introduce something a little different.
是嘛？还有别的方法？
Oh, yeah? Something else?
宠物疗法
Pet therapy.
听好了
Now listen,
如果你可以跟狗交流，并建立起情感联♥系♥
if you can talk to a dog and make an emotional connection,
就可以帮助你学习如何与人交往
it can help you learn how to connect with people.
呃… – 狗能教会你接纳
Um… -Dogs teach acceptance.
只是…养狗会严重侵犯我的私人空间
It’s just, you know, a dog is a serious invasion of my, um, of my space.
麦克斯，我们要采取更为激进的手段
Max, we need to take some bold steps here.
我…我不确定我有能力… – 麦克斯，你对狗有什么意见吗？
I’m… I’m not sure I’m capable… -Do you have a problem with dogs, Max?
我只是…
Well, I just…
我对狗能有什么意见
I don’t have a problem with a dog.
“我对狗能有什么意见”
“I don’t have a problem with a dog.”
什么 – “什么？”
What? -“What?”
对不起 – 对不起，我只是…
I’m sorry. -I’m sorry. I just…
你这也是在“镜映”
That was mirroring.
没错，就是镜映
Mirroring. Mm-hmm.
走出去吧，麦克斯
Go out, Max.
去和狗狗建立感情
Go out and make a canine connection.
好吧，知道了
Yeah, I get it.
嘿
Hey.
那家伙跟我分手了 – 噢不，真的吗？
Whatever-his-name broke up with me. -Oh, no. Really?
是啊，他说我不跟他亲近，但我不止跟他亲了
Yeah. He said I was closed off, but, like, I let him in.
也让他进了啊
Like, in.
你知道这世上不止打炮这一种亲密关系的吧？
You know there are other kinds of intimacy, right?
都让他长驱直入了
All the way in.
我只是担心你这么搞，连你的Bumble(交友软件)会员费都要涨价了
I’m just worried Bumble’s gonna raise its price on ya.
我现在就是有太多事要忙了，不仅有工作
Listen, I just have a lot going on right now with work
还有一堆生活琐事
and just, like, life in general.
我知道我有需求，但我不需要男人来满足我
And I know that I have my needs, but I don’t need a guy for that.
问个严肃的问题
Serious question.
个人简介里要写实际身高还是穿了高跟鞋的身高？
Do I put my real height in my profile or my height in heels?
你用不着写了，我们今晚出去浪 – 噢，谢天谢地
Uh, not needed. Tonight we’re going out. – Oh, thank God.
放在这应该挺不错的