一天（2011）

Hello, stranger.
给您带了礼物
Look, I’ve got a present for you here.
不是我买♥♥的 艾玛买♥♥的
It’s not from me. It’s from Emma.
我来
Here, let me.
谢谢
Thank you.
真好
Oh, how lovely.
有点居心不良吧
A little ambitious maybe.
你和她今后会不会有点小故事啊
You might want to push her towards short stories in the future.
妈妈 别这样
Mum, don’t.
你最近在忙什么
So what have you been up to?
我是苗迪特 今晚给大家带来的是什么呢
I’m Dexter Mayhew. What a show we’ve got for you tonight.
我们请到了一位男士…
We’ve got a man who claims…
把这点快进过去
I’ll skip this next bit.
有一段访谈相当精彩
There’s an interview that’s pretty good.
我迟些再看吧
Perhaps I’ll watch it later.
现场秀节目总会有意外
The live show is always a bit patchy.
你为什么一定要用那种语调说话
I don’t understand why you have to use that voice,
算了 这些和我也没什么关系
but then I suppose I just don’t care for this sort of thing.
那样能吸引青少年
It’s just a bit of fun for kids.
他们从酒吧回家后会看
They just watch it after the pub.
你的意思是我喝的太少了
You mean I’m not drunk enough?
和喝多少没关系
No, it’s not that.
说实在的 迪特 姑娘们在笼子里跳舞
You know, honestly, Dexter. Dancing girls in cages.
有什么好看的
Is this what it’s come to?
我只是主持而已
I just host it.
不过是达到目的的手段
It’s a means to an end, that’s all.
但是你想达到什么目的
But to what end?
我们总是告诉你想做什么就去做
We always said you could do anything you wanted.
好吧 你们想让我做什么
Fine. What do you want me to do?
-做点好事 -这就不错
– Something good. – It is good.
我只是在做应该做的事
I just do what I’m told.
我就能做这些了
Look, this is what I can do.
抱歉
I’m sorry.
吃药让我容易发脾气
The medication makes me ratty.
我需要躺下休息一下 晚上就好了
I just need a little lie-down. I’ll be better tonight.
是啊
Yeah, you know, um…
其实 我今晚要出席个首映式
Actually, I’ve got this premiere thingy tonight.
真对不起 我不能错过 是《侏罗纪公园》的首映
Look, I’m sorry. I can’t miss it. It’s Jurassic Park.
儿子 帮我一下
I’m afraid I’m going to need some help.
你还好吗 搂着我脖子
Are you all right? Here, put your arm around me.
好的 没事吗
All right. All right?
真的没事吗
Are you all right?
没事
Yes.
用不用给你拿点什么 水还是酒
Can I get you anything? Water? Dry martini?
几点了
What time is it?
六点一刻
Quarter past 6:00.
我打了个盹
Yeah, I must have dozed off.
你就在家待这么一会儿
I’m afraid you’ve missed our day.
你♥爸♥有点生你的气
Your father’s a little angry with you.
那我今晚不走了
Look, I’ll stay tonight.
不 走吧
No. You go.
你们爷俩吵架
No pleasure for me watching
没什么好看的
you and your father snarling at each other.
我能直说吗
Can I speak frankly?
一定要吗
Do you have to?
我有这个特权
I think it’s my prerogative.
我知道你想成为一个好男人
I know that you’re going to be a fine man.
体面 有爱心 有修养
Decent, loving, accomplished.
不过我觉得你还差一点
But I don’t think you’re there yet.
现在呢 我担心
And right now, well, I worry
你再也变不好了
that you’re not very nice anymore.
我无话可说
Well, there’s nothing I can say to that.
什么也不用说
There is nothing you have to.
我不想和你吵
I’m not going to argue with you.
清醒以后把你的车开走
You can come and collect your car when you’re sober.
你开玩笑吧
You’re being ridiculous.
我是说 你不能没收我的车钥匙
I mean, you cannot confiscate my car key.
你竟敢侮辱我的智商
Do not dare to insult my intelligence!
你妈那么爱你 你明明知道
Now your mother loves you very much. You know that.
说不定什么时候她就…
But for whatever time she has left to her…
如果今后还是这副样子来看你妈
If you ever, ever come to see your mother in this state again,
我连大门都不会让你进
I will not let you in the house.
直接把门摔在你的脸上 现在
I will close the door in your face. Now…
走
Go.
好的
Fine.
你不在家啊
You’re not there.
刚想起来 你今晚有个约会
I just remembered you’re on a hot date tonight.
我打的太晚了
I’m too late.
收到留言后给我回电好吗
Okay, can you call me when you get this?
我想找个人说说话
It’s just I need to speak to someone.
不是找个人 就想和你说
Not someone. You.
电锯手臂 真疯狂
A chainsaw for an arm. It was mad.
经典之作
It’s a work of timeless beauty.
我觉得这个是三部里最好看的了
It’s the finest of the trilogy, methinks.
虽然我没看过《鬼玩人》的前两部
And I still understood it
这个也看懂了
without seeing Evil Dead I or Evil Dead II.
我唯一遗憾的是 暴♥力♥镜头太少
My only complaint would be that there wasn’t enough violence.
你应该不会介意的 对吧
You didn’t mind, did you?
有没有兴趣看《蓝白红三部曲之蓝色》
Or did you want to see Three Colors: Blue?
我有墨西哥玉米片 不点头盘了
I’m gonna skip a starter because I had those nachos,
你只管点 想吃什么就点什么
but you go ahead. You can have anything you like.
什么这么值钱 十四英镑
Anything up to the value of, say, 14 pounds?
不不 别管我 随便点
No, no, seriously, no, have anything.
理智点就行了
Well, you know, within reason.
再次见到你真好
It’s just so good to see you again.
你肯定会成为一位迷人的老师
And you’re going to be an amazing teacher.
-祝贺你 -谢了
– Congratulations. – Thanks.
真希望你这样的老师能再多一点
I wish I’d had more teachers like you.
不过我一点作业都没做 莫老师
Not that I’d have got any work done. Miss Morley.
没有新留言
You have no new messages.
喜剧就像一个残忍♥的情妇
Comedy’s a cruel mistress.
艾玛 有时我会想
Sometimes, Emma, I think the only way
要想让我的名字在灯光下闪耀
I’m going to see my name up in lights
唯一的办法就是我改名叫”紧急出口”
is if I change it to Emergency Exit.
总之 我现在正在即兴演出
Anyway, I’m doing an improvisation night at the moment.
哈哈先生 不是他的真名
Mr. Giggles. Not his real name.
现在我更忠于表象
But I think I’m gonna stick to the more observational material.
在搞懂猫咪和狗狗差别的时候
I’ve got this whole thing at the moment
我领悟了这一点
about the difference between cats and dogs.
别说了
Hey, please stop.
好吧 你知道做一个喜剧演员
Okay. Do you know what the hardest thing
最困难的事情是什么吗
about being a stand-up comedian is?
服装吗
Is it the clothes?
非常好 但错了
Very good. No.
最难的是人们希望你一直演下去
It’s that people expect you to be on all the time.
一旦你不再滑稽 你将会是什么
Because if you’re not being funny, then what are you being?
伊恩 现在不是在演出
Ian, it’s not a performance.
只有一点点不像 不是吗
Except it sort of is, though, isn’t it?
见到你我很兴奋 可以说是很紧张
I’ve been so excited about seeing you. Like nervous.
抱歉
I’m sorry, I…
我也不太擅长这种事
I’m no good at this stuff, either.
今天是我的毕业纪念日
It’s just I graduated today.
我终于有资格能真正做点有用的事情了
I’m finally, actually qualified to do something useful,
我想找个人庆祝一下
and I wanted to celebrate with someone.
迪特没空吗
Was Dexter busy?
艾玛 你听到的时候 能不能找个出租车
Em, when you hear this, can you just get in a cab?
我来付车费
And I’ll pay.
你也可以留下来过夜
Maybe you could even stay over,
睡沙发上之类的
you know, on the sofa or something?
我只是需要见见你
I need to just see you.
求你了 能不能过来一趟