十二罗汉（2004）

– So what? – Yeah, what’s your point?
用声东击西那一招
So we do a Lookie-loo.
-声东击西加上混水摸鱼 u3000-找泰丝…
– It’s a Lookie-loo with a Bundle of Joy. – A Lookie-loo with Tess…
用这两招?
…and a Bundle of Joy?
你发疯了 小子
You’ve gone right out of your tree, my son. He’s mad.
他疯了 简直异想天开 而且还缺一个人
It’s crazy. It’s Italian-television crazy, and we’re still one short.
想想看 她能在白天接近彩蛋
No, think about it. She can get near the egg during daylight with half the system down.
保安系统至少能解除一半
这是一石三鸟之计
I mean, that’s a trifecta.
他说得有道理 打电♥话♥
He might be right. Make the calls.
莱纳斯卡得威 你这臭小子
Linus Caldwell, you are not following the procedures…
你没按照我跟丹尼说好的程序
…Danny talked about if Terry Benedict shows up.
一定出了事 出了什么事?
Something is wrong. What is wrong?
丹尼没事 他跟罗斯在一起
Danny’s fine. He’s with Rusty.
只是现在他们处于失去联络状态
During this part of the plan, they can’t communicate with us.
向我保证他没受伤
Promise he isn’t hurt.
我保证他没受伤
I promise he isn’t hurt.
你们会错过期限
You’re gonna miss the deadline.
我想这一票干完 丹尼一定很想在罗马见到你
Danny would be thrilled if you met him in Rome when the job’s finished.
他想你想得要命
He misses you like crazy.
你念过艺术 一定很爱罗马
Plus, you studied art, so I know how much you love Rome.
只有好处 没有坏处
There’s no downside here.
他们把你调♥教♥得真好
Wow, they’re bringing you along fast, aren’t they?
是啊 如果你搭上七点的…
Yes. Danny would be more thrilled…
… 班机就太棒了 你现在就得出门
…if you were on the 7 p. m. Out of JFK, which means you have to leave right now.
第二个星期二
只剩一天
我只要求一台中型房♥车
I thought I’d requested a midsize.
-丹尼有来吗? -他很想来
– Danny here? – He wanted to be.
这趟飞行舒适吗?我不确定你要走道或窗口座位
Did you have a nice flight? We weren’t sure if you were a window or aisle person.
-丹尼被关了多久? -只有两天 真的
– How long’s Danny been in jail? – Just a couple of days, really.
往好处想 班奈狄动不了他
Which, you know, on the bright side, he’s completely safe from Benedict.
他说一切OK 居然敢骗我
He told me everything was fine. He lied right to me.
我想他的意思是 我们的时间和金钱都不多
What I think he meant by “fine” is we’re running low on time and money…
现在欠的钱 比一开始更多
…and we’re deeper in debt than when we started.
我想你们有计划要救他吧
I assume that you have a plan to get him out.
-她说起话来很像她 u3000-才怪 她有南方口音
– Actually, she sounds like her. – No, she needs a Southern accent.
-你会装南方腔吗? -你们在搞什么鬼?
– Can you do a Southern…? – What the hell is going on with you guys?
这样不行 口音很重要 人们最注意口音
Not quite. The accent is crucial. It’s the first thing people notice.
-给我说清楚 开辆顶级礼车干嘛? -抱歉
– This ridiculous car, what is it doing? – Okay, I’m sorry.
我就直话直说吧 因为我们不幸…
All right, I’m just gonna level with you. Due to certain personnel losses…
折损了一些人手
…that we have sustained…
我们得做一些调整
…we’re… Various readjustments had to be made.
你要扮演一个小角色
You’re gonna have to play a small role in this thing.
请你把这个戴上
Okay? So can you put these on?
还有这顶帽子
I’d like you to put this hat on.
穿上孕妇装 底下塞枕头
You’re gonna put on that, and you’re gonna stuff it with that.
我们转过去 给你点隐私
And we’ll turn around, just give you a little moment.
小角色
Small role.
我要扮谁?
Who am I supposed to be?
这个嘛…
Well…
真的吗?
Oh, really?
没问题
Well, absolutely.
我们可以把套房♥空出来
I can have… We can make the suite available.
不会麻烦
No, no, no trouble at all.
这真是太… 她再度莅临 我们深感荣幸
I mean, we would love… We are honored that she would think of us again.
好的
Okay.
谢谢
Okay. Thank you.
再见
Bye.
茱莉亚罗勃兹要来
这要怎么把丹尼救出来?
How is this going to get Danny out?
-我们需要一个名人 u3000-怎么不去找一个?
– We needed someone famous. – Why didn’t you get someone famous?
回想《你是我今生的新娘》
Just think Four Weddings and a Funeral.
那部电影不是她演的
She wasn’t in Four Weddings and a Funeral.
要说”我” 不是”我”演的
“I.” “I wasn’t in Four Weddings and a Funeral. ”
保护你的假胎儿
Just protect your fake baby.
天啊 我快昏倒了
I’m hyperventilating.
-欢迎 罗勃兹小姐 u3000-谢谢 她很累了
– Welcome back, Signora Roberts. – Thank you. She’s very tired.
-拿吧 拿吧 -好
– Take it. Take it. – Okay.
快躲起来
Oh, let’s hide. Let’s hide.
茱莉亚?
Julia?
我叫泰莉莎
My name is Teresa.
意大利语
我好像见到一位好朋友
I thought I saw a friend of mine, someone that I know.
不 不能关掉压力感测器 不
No, absolutely not. You can’t turn off the pressure sensors. No.
她不能碰
Well, she can’t touch it.
她只是电影明星 不是教宗
She’s a movie star. She’s not the pope, for Chris sake.
你是乔治亚州人 67年出生
You’re from Smyrna, Georgia. You were born in 1967.
-你喜欢织毛衣 u3000-中间名是费欧娜
– You like croquet and knitting. – Your middle name is Fiona.
你有十只狗和七匹马
You’ve got 10 dogs, seven horses.
-你最喜欢桃子的颜色 u3000-她的马没有比狗多啦
– Your favorite color is peach. – She doesn’t have more horses than dogs.
-我不行 我办不到 u3000-泰丝 没时间了
– I can’t do this. I can’t. – Tess, we’re out of time.
-叫她茱莉亚 u3000-茱莉亚
– “Julia,” please. – Julia.
我知道你很没安全感 这就对了
No, we understand you’re feeling insecure. That is totally natural.
-电影明星都很没安全感 u3000-不是啦 我快抓狂了
– You’re playing an actress. They’re insecure. – No, I’m not insecure. I’m freaking out.
-这就对了 u3000-你演得很棒
– Yes. That’s right. – Brilliant!
你在演戏
You’re playing a role.
你才在演戏 我在冒充一个人
No, you’re playing a role. I’m apparently playing a real person.
-又怎样? -这是不对的
– Yeah, so? – It’s just wrong.
你是说很没道德吗?
You mean, like, morally?
不是啦 对… 是啦
No. Well, yes.
这不是重点 你要我冒充一个…
Probably… It’s not the point. The point is you want me to speak…
活生生的真人 这太过分了
…for someone who’s out there somewhere. It’s too personal.
你要害你老公坐一辈子牢吗?
More personal than your husband doing 25-to-life?
他不会坐太久的牢 班奈狄会马上把他做掉
He won’t do 25-to-life. Benedict will have him killed immediately.
-不要 u3000-抱歉 我不该这么说
– Don’t. – I’m sorry, that was stupid.
从进去到出来只要花十分钟 我们也只有十分钟
We’re gonna be in and out in 10 minutes. We have to. That’s our time frame.
你不想说话就别开口 只要微笑对着镜头挥手就行
You don’t even have to talk. Give them a big smile, wave at the cameras.
-她只会这一招 u3000-要是开口…
– That’s all she ever does. – But if you do say something…
别忘了南方口音 去掉尾音 母音轻声带过
…don’t forget your accent. Drop your G’s, and longer vowels.
客房♥服务
Room service.
不会有事的 你只要记住
It’s gonna be fine. You’ve gotta remember something.
你只是个明星 影迷的偶像
You are an image to these people. You’re like an object.
没人真的认识你 你不会碰到任何朋友
Nobody actually knows you. The last thing this is gonna be is personal.
-你的预产期不是过了吗? -你跑来罗马干嘛?
– Aren’t you overdue? – Why are you in Rome?
-我来度假 u3000-我好爱你
– I’m here on vacation. – I love you.
你怀孕八个月了 不该坐飞机了
You are not supposed to fly eight months pregnant.
-我知道 u3000-丹尼在吗?
– I know. – Is Danny here?
-当然在 u3000-丹尼
– Of course. – Danny.
-不是啦 u3000-他在工作?
– No, no, I mean, he has… – He’s working?
-算是啦 u3000-在罗马?
– Yes. Yes and no. He’s working. – In Rome?
-我是葛伦史奈威 宣传公♥关♥ u3000-嗨 葛伦
– Bruce. Glen Snackwell, publicity. – Hey, Glen.
-我是你的超级大影迷 u3000-谢谢
– I’m a big fan. – Thanks.
你把玛西开除了?
Great. You fired Marcy?
你把她开除 两星期前你才跟我说我应该请她
You fired Marcy. Two weeks ago, you told me I should go with Marcy.
-对不起 u3000-跟他说玛西的事
– I’m sorry. – Tell him what happened with Marcy, Glen.
-有八卦吗? – 对 她一向都很八卦
– There’s a story? – Always a story with Marcy.
-玛西 玛西… -你看起来好极了
– Marcy… Marcy… – You look fantastic.
-这真是个惊喜 u3000-你最好坐下来
– Such a surprise. – You should sit down.
我是电影宣传 玛西没被开除
I’m with the studio. Marcy’s still very much in the picture.
我想跟你谈谈
I just wanted to get you for a second.
我们想用生小孩… 替她争取片约
We’re looking to come off this baby thing strong.
奥斯卡小金人魔咒… 开始发威了
You know, that little statue on the mantle starts smirking at you after a while.
你懂我的意思吗?
You know what I’m saying?
-我不懂 u3000-好 抱歉
– Not really, Glen, no. – Sorry. Yeah.
茱莉 我想起来了
Hey, Jules, that reminds me.
我去你家玩之后 一直想打电♥话♥给你
I’ve been meaning to call you since the girls and I were in Taos.
-见到你真好 我好高兴 u3000-过来 这太脏了
– It’s so good to see you. – Come here. These are a mess.
我女儿把她的毯子忘在你家了
Anyway, Tallulah left her SpongeBob blanket in the red casita.
-喔 u3000-我在想… 来
– Okay. – So, what I wanna do… Here.
-谢谢你 u3000-不客气
– Thank you. – You’re welcome.
-谢谢 布鲁斯 u3000-打给马可斯…
– Thanks, Bruce. – Is call Marcus…
请他找露易丝 安排人去把毯子拿回来
…and have him get ahold of Louise so we can make arrangements to get it.