诺丁山（1999）

但更糟的是
But to make matters worse,
现在看来似乎
it now appears as though…
当时还有人拍了我的录像
someone was filming me as well.
本来只是愚蠢的拍照行为
So what was a stupid photo shoot…
现在看起来像是在拍色情片
now looks like a porn film.
那些照片被卖♥♥出去了 被传得…
The pictures have been sold and they’re just…
满天飞
everywhere.
我不知道要去哪里
I didn’t know where to go.
酒店被围得水泄不通
The hotel’s surrounded.
我知道我们分开已经好几个月了 但…
I know it’s been months, but…
来这里就对了
This is the place.
谢谢你
Thank you.
我只在伦敦
I’m just in London…
待两天 但你们的报纸
for two days, but what with your papers,
让这里成了最糟的地方
it’s the worst place to be.
我是说…
I mean…
那些照片如此可怕 如此粗制滥造
These pictures are just so horrible, and they’re so grainy.
让我看起来就像…
It makes me look like…
别去想了
Don’t think about it.
我们会解决好的
We’ll sort it out.
你想要什么 喝茶吗
What would you like? Tea?
或者泡澡
Bath?
泡澡挺好的
A bath would be great.
我的老天啊
Oh, Christ alive!
真不错 精彩
Brilliant. Fantastic.
太棒了
Magnificent.
你一定就是斯派克吧
You must be Spike.
-你好 -我只是…
– Hi. – Just…
过来看看
checkin’.
感谢你 上帝
Thank you, God.
上次的事 我很抱歉
I’m really sorry about last time.
他突然飞过来找我
I mean, he just flew in.
-我毫不知情 -好吧
– I had no idea. – All right.
我也不知道他下次会不会再次突然飞过来
In fact, I had no idea if he was ever gonna fly in again.
听着 不是每个人都有机会
Listen, it’s not often one has the opportunity to
给好莱坞大牌影星清理碗碟的
adios the plates of a major Hollywood film star.
我当时 觉得挺激动的
It was, um… It was thrilling for me.
那他怎么样了
So how is he?
我不知道
I don’t know.
我和他之间的感情到了
It just got to the point…
我不记得和他在一起的原因的阶段
where I couldn’t remember any of the reasons why we were together.
你呢 有恋人吗
And you and love?
这个问题吧
Oh, well, there’s a question, um,
没有有趣的答案
without an interesting answer.
我经常想着你
I have thought about you.
只是 每次我想要和普通人
It’s just that anytime I’ve tried to keep…
维持一种普通关系的时候
anything normal with a person that was normal…
事情都会变得一团糟
it’s just been a disaster.
听着 我内心充满感激 真的
Listen, I appreciate that. Absolutely.
那是什么 你的新电影吗
So what is that, a film you’re doing?
周二在洛杉矶开拍
Start in L.A. On Tuesday.
你愿意让我帮你过一遍台词吗
Would you like me to take you through your lines?
可以吗 因为台词实在太多了
Would you? Cause it’s all talk, talk, talk.
来吧
Hand it over.
好吧 基本情节是什么
Right. Um, basic plot?
我是个很难应付 但也很厉害的初级军官
I’m a difficult but brilliant junior officer…
在大约20分钟后
who in about 20 minutes is
我将避免一场核灾难 拯救世界
gonna save the world from nuclear disaster.
很好 不错
Well done, you.
指挥部发来消息
“Message from Command.
要让他们送H.K过来吗
Would you like them to send in the H.K.s?”
不需要 移交四台T.R.S过来
No. Turn over four T.R.S,
在K.F.T于19点回来前 需要拿到雷达反馈
and tell them we need radar feedback before the K.F.T.s return at 1900.
同时通知五角大楼
Then inform the Pentagon
从10点到12点15分 我们需要黑星掩护
we’ll need Black Star cover from 1000 through 1215.
如果你敢说
And if you say one word about
我刚刚这段台词说错了多少处
how many mistakes I made in that speech,
我就用橄榄砸你
I’ll pelt you with olives.
很好 上尉
Very well, Captain.
-我立刻把你的命令传达出去 -谢谢
– I’ll pass that on straightaway. – Thank you.
-我说错了多少处 -11处
– How many mistakes did I make? – Eleven.
该死的
Damn it.
-维恩莱特… -是卡特莱特
– And Wainwright… – Cartwright.
卡特莱特 维恩莱特 管你叫什么
Cartwright, Wainwright, whatever your name is,
我对小吉米保证过 他生日时我会回家的
I promised little Jimmy I’d be home for his birthday,
你能帮我联♥系♥他一下 说我可能要迟些回去吗
so could you get a message to him that I may be late.
当然没问题 是叫小强尼吧
Certainly. And, uh, little Johnny?
-我儿子叫强尼吗 -是的
– My son’s name is Johnny? – Yep.
那也给他也传个话吧
Then get a message to him too.
我会尽力而为的 上尉
I’ll do what I can, Captain,
但我保证不了什么
but I can’t promise anything.
然后卡特莱特就离开了
And Cartwright goes.
你觉得怎么样
What do you think?
很吸引人
Gripping.
虽然这不是简·奥斯汀的作品
You know, it’s not Jane Austen.
也不是亨利·詹姆斯的作品 但是也很吸引人
It’s not Henry James, but it’s… gripping.
你觉得我应该去演亨利·詹姆斯的作品吗
Think I should do Henry James instead?
我觉得你演他的作品会非常出色
I think you would be brilliant in Henry James.
但这个编剧
But this writer…
是好几个编剧
writers…
他们同样也很厉害
they’re pretty damn good too.
亨利的作品《鸽之翼》里就没人会说
You never get anyone on Wings of the Dove saying,
“通知五角大楼 我们需要黑星掩护”
“Inform the Pentagon we need Black Star cover.”
我觉得正因此才让那本书少了些精彩
For me the book is the poorer for it.
真不敢相信你居然有这幅画
I can’t believe you have that picture.
夏加尔
出生于白俄♥罗♥斯♥的著名画家
你喜欢夏加尔吗
You like Chagall?
是的
I do.
这幅画就像是爱情应有的模样
It feels like how love should be…
飘荡在在深蓝的天空中
floating through a dark blue sky.
还有一只拉着小提琴的山羊
With a goat, playing a violin.
是啊
Well, yes.
若是没有拉小提琴的山羊 那就不是幸福了
Happiness isn’t happiness without a violin-playing goat.
你的脚很大啊
You have big feet.
是的 我的脚向来都很大
Yes. Yes, always have had.
你知道大家对于大脚男人的说法吧
You know what they say about men with big feet.
不知道 怎么说的
No. What’s that?
大脚
Uh, big feet,
大鞋[大屌♥]large… shoes.
让人很烦的是
The thing that is so irritating…
我现在一看到裸♥露♥条款 就一肚子火气
is that now I’m so fierce when it comes to nudity clauses.
你的合约里 还真的有裸♥露♥条款这种东西吗
You actually have… clauses in your contract about nudity?
当然了
Definitely.
“可以在影片中露出艺人的臀沟上面一部分
“You may show the dent of the top of the artist’s buttocks,
但不能露出臀瓣”
but neither cheek.”
或者是 如果要用到臀部替身
Or if there’s a stunt bottom being used…
“需要与艺人商议”
“Artist must have full consultation.”
-你有臀部替身吗 -我可以有啊
– You have a stunt bottom? – I could have a stunt bottom, yes.
真的有人会选择比自己的臀部更好看的替身出镜吗
Are people tempted to go for better bottoms than their own?
当然啦 我就会 这很重要
Yeah. I would. This is important stuff.
那这工作可真有些惨
It’s one hell of a job, isn’t it?
护照的职业一栏要写什么
What do you put on your passport?
“职业 梅尔·吉布森的臀部”
“Profession: Mel Gibson’s bottom.”
其实梅尔一直都是亲自露臀的
Actually, Mel does his own ass work.
-好吧 -他为何不露呢
– Right. – Why wouldn’t he?
-当然了 -很美味的
– Absolutely. – It’s delicious.
你指的是冰淇淋还是梅尔·吉布森的臀部
What, the ice cream or Mel Gibson’s bottom?
两者都很美味
Both. Equally.
但你不会两者都去舔吧
But you wouldn’t necessarily lick both?
这可是酸的[荡♥妇♥]Well, this is tart.
而且没有细毛
And fuzz-free.