北好莱坞（2021）

嘿 伙计们 你们那边的朋友为你们送来了这个
Hey guys, your friends over there sent this for you.
操
Fuck!
你们都是疯批
You guys are crazy.
这就是为什么我这么爱北好莱坞
That’s what I love about North Hollywood. You know?
你的朋友 社区
You see your friends, community…
这是个很棒的社区
It’s a nice neighborhood.
你要在这待一辈子 -当然不会
You’re gonna stay here forever? -Hell no.
咋了 这座小庙容不下你这尊大神
What, you think you’re too good for it or something?
不 我想去看看这个世界 你知道吗
No, it’s not that. I wanna see the world, you know?
我觉得还是北好莱坞容不下你了
No, I think you think you’re too good for NoHo.
行吧 如果你把你们的拇指从屁♥股♥里拿出来 你们也可以做到
Yeah. Well maybe if you guys took your thumbs out your butts, you can do it too.
对 也许如果你把你的拇指从你的屁♥眼♥里拿出来
Yeah. Maybe if you take your thumbs out of your buttholes…
你也可以做到 -对啊 你着急了
then you can do it too. -Yeah, you’re gonna be mad
当我在度假 打球的时候可把你急坏了
when I’m balling, going on vacations and shit.
我已经在度假了-好怼
I already go on vacations. -Hot!
是 但是你的钱都是你爹妈付的好吗
Yeah, but your fucking– your parents pay for that shit, all right.
你不–你甚至不知道我在说什么
You don’t– you don’t even know what I’m talking about.
你没必要陪我走到我的车那里
You didn’t have to walk me to my car.
我是个绅士 别惊讶
I’m a gentlemen. Don’t be surprised.
好 好
Yeah. Yeah.
这车真不错
That’s a nice car.
今天真有趣
This was fun.
是啊
For sure.
好啦 拜拜
Oh my God! Okay, bye!
你最近在做什么
So what you been on man?
还在搞那个什么祭坛的东西
Still doing that altar service shit?
没 你还记得杰西神父吗
Nah, you remember father Jesse?
知道 那个秃顶
Yeah, bro. Off tops.
他说我们年纪太大了 不能做侍童了
He said we’re too old to altar serve now.
靠
Damn.
嘿 我知道你认识诺兰和以赛亚
Hey, so I know you know Nolan and Isaiah,
我在想 也许你能把我介绍给他们
was wondering if you could maybe introduce me to ’em.
我昨天和’他们在一起
Bro, I was with ’em yesterday.
我正准备介绍你什么的
I was trying to say your name and shit.
我不知道你为什么不过来
I don’t know why you didn’t come over.
这狗♥日♥的♥要去哪
Where’s this motherfucker going?
只是因为你们看起来超忙
Just looked super busy, you know?
我不想 不想打扰你们
I didn’t wanna… interrupt you guys.
但如果有机会我可以和你们一起去滑板
But if there’s any a time I can go skate with you guys…
我非常期待
I’m super down.
好
Good, bro.
有机会我会告诉你 -说定了
I’ll let you know. -A’ight. Word.
说真的 任何时间都行 我随时都能做个公交来
Seriously, like any time, I’ll take a bus wherever.
我特别想和你们一起 -没事儿
I’m super down. -It’s all good, bro.
只不过你别搞得很饥渴一样
Just don’t be thirsty about it.
我没有–我没有饥渴好吗
I’m not being– I’m not being thirsty, all right.
麦克 你穿的是毛衣和短裤吗
Mike, are you wearing a sweater and shorts?
啥 -你为什么不♥穿♥长裤
What? -Why aren’t you wearing pants?
爸 人可以穿短裤和毛衣
Pops. You can wear shorts and a sweater.
这没任何意义 穿上长裤和衬衫
That doesn’t make any sense. Wear pants and a shirt.
那如果我胳膊冷了怎么办
What if my arms get cold?
你今天早上去哪了
Where were you this morning?
我去公园了 怎么了
I was at the park. Why, why what’s up?
好吧 因为希利教练在你出去的时候打电♥话♥来 他说你退出了
Well, because Coach Healey called while you were out, and he said that you quit.
爸爸 我–我喜欢水球 但你知道 我得专注于滑板
Pops, I– I love water polo, but you know, I gotta focus on skating.
你需要锻炼 而且你现在需要把你的注意力放在大学上
You need structure, and you need to put your focus right now on college.
我可以同时做 -你最好两个都做
I can do both. -You better do both.
你最好不要只搞滑板
You better not just do the skate.
你今天要去哪里
Where are you going today?
我要去滑板了
I’m gonna go skate.
你必须填了这些大学申请
You gotta get on top of these college applications.
它们又不会自己把自己填了
They’re not gonna do themselves.
那都是垃圾-你说啥
That’s trash. -What was that?
我说那都是垃圾 -你再说一遍
I said that’s trash. -What was that?
你给我滚过来
Get your ass over here.
你再说一遍试试
Try me.
赶紧去把表填了
Get those applications done.
阿道夫 把窗户打开
Adolf! Open the window.
麦克 你♥他♥妈♥搞啥呢
Michael, what the hell are you doing?
嗨 呃 我很抱歉 阿道夫在家吗 阿道夫在家吗
Hi! Uh, I’m sorry! Is Adolf home?
你为什么要这样盯着它 它不会咬你的
Damn. Why are you looking at it like that? It ain’t gonna bite you.
好兄弟 你♥他♥妈♥倒是尝尝啊 –真有人吃这个
Bro, just fucking try it. -People eat this?
我来自路易斯安那州的拉斐特 这就是我们的吃法
I’m from Lafayette, Louisiana, see. That’s the way we eat.
小龙虾太妃糖 浓汤 布丁
Crawfish etouffee, gumbo, boudin…
好吧 我会的 我只是 我刚吃过东西
Well I would, I just… I ate… not too long ago,
我不饿
so… I’m full.
爹 这尼哥真挑剔啊
Pops man, this nigga just picky as fuck.
这个啥
This what?
对不起 这个好兄弟真挑剔
Oh, I’m sorry… brotherpicky as fuck.
太晚了
Too late. Cha-ching.
这是新规定
This his new thing.
每当我说那个词
Every time I say the word
“尼哥“ 他就让我做十个俯卧撑
“nigga,” he make me do ten fucking pushups.
二十个了
That’ll be twenty, cha-ching.
我要带宝宝们去营地了 –好的宝贝
I’m taking the babies to camp. -All right, baby.
你们还要去滑板
Y’all still goin’ skating?
这个火机给你 老是说我他妈偷你火机
Since you always say I steal your your fuckin’ lighter.
我不抽 谢了
I’m good.
大家都说你滑板技术很好 -大家还都说他鸡鸡小呢
Everyone talks about how you’re good at skating. -He also has a tiny penis.
我知道你鸡鸡小 我可以在你的短裤里看到
I know you have the smallest penis. I can see it in your shorts.
我可以看到轮廓 -别他妈看我的小♥弟♥弟♥好吗
I can see the outline. -Don’t fucking look at my dick, bro.
我没看 我只是能看到 -提醒你一下 别看我的弟弟
I’m not looking, I can just see it. The tip. -Don’t look at my dick.
你下次能不能带包Backwood 操
Could you bring a Backwood next time? Damn.
你啥意思 -没人抽那种烟
What do you mean “damn?” Backwoods? -Nobody smoke those.
我们没有Backwoods
We don’t have Backwoods.
我们是谁 你丫把我们当说唱歌♥手了是吧
What are we? Right? This guy thinks we’re rappers.
我又不是说唱歌♥手
We think we’re rappers. We’re not rappers.
你不想过来耍耍
You don’t want to hang out over here.
这里很棒棒哦
It’s super nice over here, I’m just sayin’.
什么都不会发生 为什么东西会往上坡滚
Nothing’s gonna happen. Why would things roll uphill?
那是不可能的-这绝对是真的
Thatt’s impossible. -No, it’s gonna happen.
所有人都知道在50年代有一群孩子死在这里
Everybody knows a bunch of kids died here in the 50s
他们的灵魂会把东西往山上推
and then they push things uphill.
好吧 很明显现在他们没上班
Well, it’s clearly not working right now.
这肯定是会发生的 -嗯 很明显现在没有
It’s gonna work. -Yeah, this is isn’t happening.
你们看 -啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊
You guys, look!
听我给你们讲个笑话
Okay. So I got a joke.
咚咚咚
Knock knock…
谁在外面
Who’s there?
欧洲 -哪个欧洲
Europe? -Europe who?
不是我 哈 哈
No, I’m not.
这他妈啥意思
What the fuck is that?
哥们 如果你讲了一个烂笑话
Bro, when you tell a bad joke,
你就得交罚款知道吗
you gotta put it in the tray. All right?
赶紧给钱
So pay up.
我不认为这是个烂笑话 操你们妈
I didn’t think it was that bad of a joke, but fuck y’all.
操♥你♥妈♥
Fuck you…
没关系的小情种
It’s okay, love bird.
辣味玉米片 -辣味玉米片对你不好
Hot Crunchies! -Hot Crunches are so bad for you.
这是我最爱的薯片
These are my favorite chips.
好吗 -我也很喜欢
Okay. -I like those too.
看见没
See, look.
所以你要买♥♥什么
So what do you get here?
我想喝昆布卡 但他们这里没有
I would get kombucha, but they just don’t have it here.
那么 你有没有试过喝唯水
Well, have you tried Just Water?
没 -那么我就让你爱上它了
No. -Well I just put you on.
你没有 我根本不喜欢唯水
No you didn’t. I don’t care about Just Water.
你嘴上这样说 但是你下次来的时候
See, you say that, but next time you come here
你肯定会买♥♥ 所以我让你爱上了唯水
you’re gonna get it. So I put you on.
没事儿的 我让你爱上它 没事
It’s okay. I put you on. It’s all good.