别让我走（2010）

I always knew you’d be a good carer.
被你看护的捐献者真幸运
Your donors are very lucky.
我昨天整晚没睡
Look, I was lying awake last night
突然想和你一起去旅行
and I suddenly had an idea that we’d take a trip together.
去哪儿
Where to?
去哪儿没想过 就是一起出去玩玩
I hadn’t much thought of where, just a trip.
不过
Although
我心里有个地方
a place did spring to mind.
同院的一名男生曾提到过
One of the boys on the other floor was talking about it.
在康辉园康复中心附近
It’s near the Kingsfield Recovery Center.
是那艘船吗 废弃在沙滩上的那个
Is it the boat? The one left on the beach?
你也听说了啊
You’ve heard about it, too?
是 听在那儿工作过的看护说的
I heard. One of the carers who worked there.
那你觉得
And do you suppose,
既然大老远开车过去
if we’re driving all that way,
要不顺道看看汤米
that we could call in on Tommy?
说了一直密切关注你们嘛
Told you I’d been keeping tabs on you.
你见过他吗
Have you seen him?
离开农舍小屋后就没见过了
No, not since The Cottages.
我也没有
No, neither have I.
怎么找他
How will we find him?
他的看护说他会在外面等着
His carer said he’d be waiting outside.
看 他在那儿
Look, there he is.
你说他隔着玻璃能认出我们吗
Do you think he’s recognized us through the glass?
别 别
No, no, no.
我们别下去了
Let’s not get out.
露丝在车里
Ruth’s in the car.
好
Oh, right.
还好吗
How are you?
很好
I’m good.
看看你的头发
Look at your hair.
是啊 头发
Oh, yeah. My hair.
真不敢相信能再次看见你们
I can’t quite believe that I have you both here.
是不是仿佛回到黑尔舍姆时代
Does it feel to you that we’re back at Hailsham again?
恍如隔日
Like no time has passed?
恍如隔日
No, it doesn’t.
一点儿都没变 对吧
No, it doesn’t at all, does it?
真的 还真奇怪
It really doesn’t at all. It’s really weird.
但也挺好
But a good weird, I think.
你们大概都没听说黑尔舍姆关闭了吧
I don’t suppose you both heard that Hailsham was closed?
残存的其他校舍跟养鸡场似的
The only schools left now, you hear they’re like battery farms.
比如晨谷
Like Morningdale.
不过肯定有夸张的成分
I’m sure that’s an exaggeration, though.
确定我们没走错吗
Are you sure we’re going the right way?
好像锁上了
It’s locked, it looks like.
没听说门是锁着的
No one said anything about this.
没人说过有扇锁了的门
No one said anything about a locked gate.
露丝 别紧张 没事的
Ruth, just relax. It’s okay.
可以从这儿进去
Can walk through here.
快来
Hey, come on.
不知道黑尔舍姆现在是不是也这样了
I wonder if that’s what Hailsham looks like now.
凯茜 你有其他同学的消息吗
Do you ever hear, Kath, about any of the students from Hailsham?
偶尔听说
Sometimes, yeah.
我听说阿曼达第一次捐献时就终结了
I heard that Amanda completed on her first donation.
这只是冰山一角吧
I think that happens more than they ever tell us.
我们康复中心有个人
Yeah, there was this guy at my care center
他总怕自己第一次捐献就终结
who was always really scared of completing on his first donation.
结果没事
But it was all fine.
他刚捐完第三次
And he’s just come through his third one now,
整个人好极了
and he’s completely all right.
有意思吧 我不觉得
It’s funny, I don’t think…
我知道我做不了合格的看护
Well, I know I wouldn’t have been a very good carer,
但某种程度上我是个合格的捐献者
but in a way I actually think I’m quite a good donor.
这是我们的职责 不是吗
That’s what we’re supposed to be, isn’t it?
希望你们能原谅我
I’d like you to forgive me.
虽然我不敢奢求
I don’t expect you to.
原谅你什么
Forgive you for what?
拆散你和汤米
For keeping you and Tommy apart.
我一直都知道应该是你们俩在一起
Should have been you two together, I always knew it.
我的所有记忆都这么告诉我
As far back as I can remember.
不是因为延期的传言
It wasn’t just because of the rumors about deferrals.
而是因为我嫉妒
It was because I was jealous.
你们拥有真爱 而我没有
You had real love and I didn’t,
我不想孤独一人
and I didn’t want to be the one that was left alone.
这是我做过的最卑鄙的事了
It’s the worst thing I ever did.
现在我想补救
And now I want to put it right.
怎么补救 露丝
I don’t know how you can do that, Ruth.
我可以
I can
如果你们成功延期
if you two get a deferral.
太晚了 露丝
It’s too late for that, Ruth.
真的太晚了 想想都觉得傻
Way too late. It’s stupid to even think about it.
不晚 你们看了就知道
It isn’t too late. Look, you’ll see, both of you.
我之所以组织这次旅行
I wanted to do this trip
就是想给你们个东西
because I had something that I wanted to give you.
夫人的地址
It’s Madame’s address.
她负责受理申请 你们需要去找她
That’s who you apply to. That’s who you have to go and see.
你从哪儿搞到的
How did you get this?
这很艰难
It wasn’t easy,
但这几年我一直反思自己的所作所为
but I’ve had years to think about what I did.
一直想怎么弥补原来的过失
And years to try and work out a way to make it right.
在农舍小屋的时候我就开始画了
I started doing them when we were at The Cottages.
去找露丝原型后的第二天
The day after we went to find Ruth’s Possible.
我意识到如果要申请延期
I realized that if I was ever going to apply for a deferral,
必须拿出点儿作品
then I’d have to show them something.
这几年我画了几百张
And I’ve done hundreds of them over the years.
美极了
They’re wonderful.
真的吗
What? Really?
是的
Yeah.
谢谢你
Well, thank you.
我之前从未给别人看过
I have never showed anyone them until now.
它们都是我的秘密
They were my secret.
正如那些色情杂♥志♥是你的秘密
Just like you and those porno magazines.
你还记着
You remember that?
是呀
Yeah.
露丝说你不懂我那时在干什么
Ruth said you didn’t understand what I was doing.
不 我觉得是她不懂你在干什么
No, I don’t think she understood what you were doing.
她以为你爱看色情图片
She thought you were looking at the dirty pictures
是想了解性知识
in order to find out about sex
想要知道自己忽略了什么
and to find out what you were missing out on or something.
但我知道
I knew.
我知道你在找自己的原型
I knew you were looking for your original.
我之前有时会有很强的性冲动
I used to have these huge urges to have sex sometimes.
有时会强烈得
And sometimes they’d be so powerful,
好像和谁睡都行
I just thought I’d do it with anyone.
我想这向我透露了某种信息
So I thought that had to tell me something.
关于我是什么人克隆出来的
Something about the kind of person I was modeled on.
很蠢吧
It’s stupid,
但我猜在那些色情杂♥志♥里
but I guessed the magazines
我最可能找到她
would be the most likely place I’d find her.
性冲动是与生俱来的
You know those urges are natural, don’t you?
每个人都有 你现在知道了吧
You know all of us had them. You know that now, right?
我们从巴士拉出发
“From Basrah we sailed,
日复一日 夜复一夜 漂洋过海
Day after day, night after night, over the sea,
走访一座又一座岛屿 一片又一片陆地
Visiting island after island and land after land,
贩卖♥♥或交易物品
Selling or bartering our goods at each.
阔别陆地数周之后的某天
One day, after some weeks of sailing out of sight of land,
我们在茫茫大海中看见了一座绿意浓浓的小岛
We saw an island in the sea with such fair greenery
宛若伊甸园中的一座花♥园♥
That it appeared like one of the gardens of Eden.
船长立刻向这座美丽的岛屿进发
At once the captain made towards this delectable land
抛锚铺梯之后
And, when the anchor had been cast and the ladder lowered,
让乘客们上岸