疯狂圣诞假期（1989）

Well, I happen to know for a fact that Santa Claus is real.
再过几天，我会证明给妳看
And in the next couple of days somehow I’m gonna prove it to you.
每一年他都会到我们家，我见过他
You know, every year he comes to our house. I’ve seen him.
-真的吗？ -我对天发誓
– That’s true? – Cross my heart.
-妳能来跟我们过节真好 -我很喜欢这里
– It’s good you came to stay with us. – I love it here.
因为上厕所时不需要穿外套
You don’t gotta put on your coat to go to the bathroom.
而且房♥子永远待在同一地方
And your house is always parked in the same place.
我想妳最好上♥床♥睡觉
I think you’d better go back to bed now.
好的，那你为什么不睡觉？
Okay. How come you ain’t sleeping?
我在找东西
Oh, I was just looking for something.
妳今天有没有看到大人送信来？
You didn’t notice if a man came here
and delivered a letter today, did you?
没有，问这做什么？
Nope. How come?
只是随便问问
Oh, just wondering.
妳赶快上♥床♥睡觉去
Now you get back to bed. Come on.
克拉克叔叔，你确定你不是圣诞老人吗？
Uncle Clark, are you sure you ain’t Santy Claus?
我确定
I’m sure.
我甚至连当精灵都不够格
I can’t even afford to be an elf.
我有两罐的药膏，整整两罐！
Two containers of K rations! Two containers of K rations!
我必须要一直挖到耳朵里的药膏都被挖出来
Then I had Spam until it was coming out of my ears.
胡扯！
Oh, bullshit!
-你不吃早餐吗？ -我现在没有心情
– Aren’t you having any breakfast? – I’m not in the mood.
你在看什么？
What are you looking at?
我在欣赏冬天早晨的宁静
Oh, the silent majesty of a winter’s morn.
以及清爽干净的空气
The clean, cool chill of the holiday air.
然后看到一个浑蛋穿着浴袍
把他马桶里的脏东西倒进我的下水道里
And an asshole in his bathrobe emptying a chemical toilet into my sewer.
-马桶满了！ -是啊
– Shitter was full! – Yeah.
-亲爱的，妳有没有检查我们的马桶？
-克拉克，拜托，他不知道该怎么办
– Have you checked our shitters, honey? – Clark, please. He doesn’t know any better.
他起码知道这是犯法的，那是下水道
It’s illegal. It’s a sewer.
如果下水道充满气体的话
任何一个人只要点火就会倒大楣
If it fills with gas, I pity the person who lights a match near it.
圣诞快乐，马桶满了
Merry Christmas. Shitter was full.
我怀疑凯萨琳和艾迪可能没有给他们的孩子买♥♥礼物
I have a suspicion Cathrine and Eddie don’t have presents for their kids.
洛奇说，艾迪告诉他圣诞老人今年不会来
Rocky said something about Eddie telling him Santa wasn’t coming this year.
茹比·苏昨晚也说同样的话
Yeah. Ruby Sue said something like that last night.
他们怎能不给孩子买♥♥礼物？
How can they have nothing for the kids?
-他已经失业了七年
-在这七年中他都找不到工作吗？
– He’s been out of work for seven years. – In seven years he couldn’t find a job?
凯萨琳说他正在等一个管理职务
Cathrine says he’s been holding out for a management position.
-艾迪，鱼饵的生意怎么样？ -还不错，你呢？
– So how’s the live-bait business, Eddie? – Well, I can’t complain. How you doing?
不是那么好
Not that good, actually.
不久以前，你的公♥司♥是不是在印度害死了很多当地人？
（狗粮）
Your company kill off all them people over in India not long ago?
不，那不是我们公♥司♥
No. We missed out on that one.
你要买♥♥的东西都买♥♥好了吗？
You’re pretty set so far as shopping goes?
我不能骗你，克拉克
Well, I can’t lie to you, Clark.
事实上生意很糟
The truth is, things ain’t going too good at all.
我不是跟你说那台露营车是我借来的吗？
You know, I told you I borrowed the RV from my neighbor?
事实上那是我的，那是我们家
Nope. It’s mine. We live in it.
因为我得卖♥♥掉房♥子、农场以及十亩的地
I had to sell off the house, the barn, the 10 acres.
现在我只剩这台车、一群猪和养虫厂
All I kept was a 50-foot plot, the pigs and the worm farm.
（狗粮）
如果凯萨琳没有被那个牧师欺骗的话
If only I had back the money that me and Cathrine…
我们应该还有一点钱的
…sent that TV preacher that was screwing the hockey players.
（狗粮）
那孩子们呢？
What about the kids?
-牧师的孩子可以照顾自己 -我是说你的孩子
– His kids can fend for themselves. – No, your kids.
噢，我自己也很为难，我不知道该怎么办
Oh, well, that’s the bitch of it. See, I don’t know what to do.
加油钱在格尔尼就花完了，我们是用瓦斯开进城的
We coasted into town on fumes. The gas money give out in Gurnee.
艾迪…
Eddie….
艾伦和我想要帮你的孩子过节
Ellen and I want to help you give the kids a nice Christmas.
-不，克拉克，你不能这样做 -我们坚持这样做
– Clark, I couldn’t do that. – No, no, we insist.
不，我不想接受别人的援助
Oh, no. I’m not one for charity, now.
我知道，艾迪
我们之所以帮你是因为我们是一家人
Oh, I know that, Eddie. This isn’t charity. It’s family.
-我不知道 -拜托
– I don’t know about that. – Now, come on.
如果你不跟我说孩子们想要什么礼物
那我只好自己去买♥♥
If you don’t tell me what they want, I’ll go out and get it on my own.
噢，天呐，这真是个惊喜，克拉克
Oh, boy. This is a surprise, Clark.
一个很棒的惊喜，真的是个惊喜
This is just a real nice surprise. Just a real nice surprise.
清单在这里，按照字母排列，最上面的是凯萨琳
Here’s a little list. Alphabetical, starting with Cathrine.
我很想买♥♥个礼物送给你，如果不是太贵的话
And if it wouldn’t be too much, I’d like to get something for you, Clark.
一定是好东西
Something really nice.
（十二月二十四日）
圣诞节前夕（暨平安夜）
-克拉克，你房♥子着火了吗？
-不，贝丝妮阿姨，那些是圣诞灯饰
– Is your house on fire, Clark? – No, Bethany, those are Christmas lights.
-不要让我摔倒，克拉克 -我会尽力，贝丝妮阿姨
– Don’t throw me down, Clark. – I’ll try not to, Aunt Bethany.
-这里是机场吗？ -我们到了！
– Is this the airport, Clark? – We’re here!
克拉克，我和贝丝妮买♥♥了一个最好的礼物给你
Hey, Gris, me and Bethany figured out the perfect gift for you.
路易士叔叔，不用买♥♥礼物给我
Oh, Uncle Lewis, you didn’t have to buy me anything.
该死，贝丝妮，他猜到了
Damn it, Bethany, he guessed it.
刚刚蛮有趣的，我喜欢坐车
Oh, that was fun. I love riding in cars.
你们什么时候搬到佛罗里达州？
When did you move to Florida?
艾伦，妳是不是还在跟克拉克约会？
Ellen, are you still dating Clark?
贝丝妮阿姨，妳不应该这样做的
Oh, Aunt Bethany, you know you shouldn’t have done that.
亲爱的，我说漏嘴了吗？
Oh, dear. Did I break wind?
天啊，大家都跑光了吗？当然没有
Jesus, did the room clear out, Bethany? Hell, no.
她是说礼物，说妳不应该带礼物来
She means presents. You shouldn’t have brought presents.
不是每一天都有人搬新家
It isn’t every day somebody moves into a new house.
他们没有搬新家
They didn’t move into a new house.
-呃…妈？ -放到客厅去，罗斯
– Um…. Mom? – In the living room, Russ.
这个房♥子比妳以前的还大
This house is bigger than your old one.
罗斯还在海军股役吗？
Is Rusty still in the Navy?
贝丝妮阿姨
Aunt Bethany,
妳跟法兰丝和凯萨琳到客厅去，向大家打招呼吧
why don’t you go with Francis and Cathrine
to the living room and say hello to everybody.
-说“大家好”吗？ -去客厅说吧
– Hello, everybody? – Just in the living room.
-我应该这样说吗？ -妳应该这样说
– I should say it? – You should say it.
大家好！
Hello, everybody!
-妈 -什么事？
– Mom. – What?
-这个盒子会叫 -让我看看
– This box is meowing. – Let me see it.
-她把她的猫包了起来 -拿到厨房♥去再打开
– She wrapped up her cat. – Take it in the kitchen and open it up.
-如果猫乱跑怎么办？
-可我们不能把牠放在盒子里
– Then we’ll have a cat running around. – You can’t leave it in the box.
为什么她会把猫包起来？
Why would somebody wrap up a cat in a box?
她老了，有点糊涂了，他们没有很多钱
She gets confused, Rusty. She and Uncle Lewis don’t have much money…
所以她就从自己家带礼物来送人
…so she takes things from the house and gives them as presents.
太棒了，我等不及要看看我的礼物
Great. Can’t wait to see what I got.
这个好像在漏…
This one here is leaking.
莱姆口味
It’s lime.
这一定是她的果冻模型，交给我，艾迪
That’s her Jell-O mold. I’ll take it, Eddie.
你到客厅去好好享受一番，罗斯，去陪叔叔玩
Why don’t you go back in the living room and enjoy yourself? Russ?
小伙子，来吧
Come on, boy.
我们去找你姐姐吧
Let’s go find your sister.
在我们开始之前
Before we begin,
因为这是贝丝妮阿姨第八十个圣诞节
since this is Aunt Bethany’s 80th Christmas…
我想她应该带领我们祈祷
…I think she should lead us in the saying of grace.
-喔… -太棒了
– Aw…. – Great.
亲爱的，他说什么？
What, dear?
祈祷！
Grace!
琦岛？她已经死了三十年
Grace? She passed away 30 years ago.
他们要妳带领祈祷
They want you to say grace.
祷告
The blessing.
“我宣誓效忠于美♥利♥坚♥合众国的国旗”
（美国国旗宣誓词）
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America…
“以及它所代表的合众国”
…and to the republic for which it stands…
“这是一个由上帝庇佑且不可分割的国家”
…one nation under God, indivisible…
“所有人在此均享有自♥由♥及正义”
…with liberty and justice for all.
-阿门 -阿门
– Amen. – Amen.
凯萨琳，如果这只火鸡味道有外表一半好看的话
Cathrine, if this turkey tastes half as good as it looks…
那会真的很不错
…I think we’re all in for a very big treat.
谢谢你
Thank you.
-把脖子留给我，克拉克 -好的，艾迪
– Save the neck for me, Clark. – Okay, Eddie.
瞧瞧那东西
Look at that.
抱歉
Sorry.
-妳为什么哭？ -我说过太早放进烤箱