我盛大的希腊婚礼（2002）

[芝加哥，清晨五点]
你最好快点结婚
You better get married soon.
你看起来很老
You’re starting to look old.
打从我十五岁起，老爸就开始念叨
My dad bas been saying that to me since I was 15…
因为好的希腊女孩儿，一生中应该做好三件事
because nice Greek girls are supposed to do three things in life.
嫁希腊老公，生希腊小孩
Marry Greek boys, make Greek babies,
煮饭给全家吃，做老妈子做到死
and feed everyone…until the day we die.
我的婚礼
我的大婚礼
我的盛大婚礼
我的盛大希腊婚礼
[佐巴舞蹈餐馆]
我小时候就跟人家不一样
When I was growing up, I knew I was different.
其他女生像金发娃娃
The other girls were blond and delicate.
我是个又黑又丑，蓬松垢发的六岁女孩
And I was a swarthy 6-year-old with sideburns.
我是多么梦想成为一个受欢迎的女孩
I so badly wanted to be like the popular girls…
哈拉八卦，吃美国三明治
all sitting together, talking…eating their Wonder Bread sandwiches.
你吃的是什么？
What’s that?
[希腊名菜：焗肉酱茄片]
幕斯阿卡
It’s moussaka.
[Moose：麋鹿，ka-ka：大便]
麋鹿大便？
Moose ?
当那些漂亮的女孩去参加幼童军时
And while the pretty girls got to go to Brownies…
我却被迫要去学希腊文
I bad to go to Greek school.
在希腊学校，我学到了很多“有用”的知识，比如
At Greek school, I learned valuable lessons like:
“尼克有一只羊，玛莉有九只羊”
“If Nick bas one goat and Maria bas nine,
“他俩多快可以结婚？”
bow soon will they marry?”
我老妈总会烧一桌热腾腾的好菜，里面充满着她的智慧
My mom was always cooking foods filled with warmth and wisdom…
她也一定不会忘了，再来些热腾腾的教训
and never forgetting that side dish of steaming-bot guilt.
尼克，别玩弄你的食物
Niko, don’t play with the food.
我像你这么大的时候，还没东西吃呢
When I was your age, we didn’t have food.
– 妈 – 干嘛？
– Ma? – What?
为什么我要去念希腊文？
Why do I have to go to Greek school?
你结婚以后，难道不想给你的婆婆写封信吗？
When you get married, don’t you want to be able to write your mother-in-law?
尼克，乖乖吃饭
Niko, come on, eat!
我们住在芝加哥，一个普通中产阶级住♥宅♥区
We lived in a normal, middle-class Chicago neighborhood of tasteful, modest homes.
结果房♥子盖的像雅典娜神殿
Our house, however, was modeled after the Parthenon…
科林斯式圆柱，希腊神像装备
complete with Corinthian columns, and guarded by statues of the gods.
如果邻居对我们的族裔背景，有任何疑问的话
In case the neighbors bad any doubts about our heritage…
那他们可以过来瞧瞧，咱们是多么景仰希腊的国旗
they could just check out our subtile tribute to the Greek flag.
老爸只相信两件事
My dad believed in only two things…
希腊人应该教化非希腊人，怎样做一个好希腊人…
that Greeks should educate non-Greeks about being Greek…
还有任何毛病，从鸡眼到红疹
and that any ailment, from psoriasis to poison ivy,
用稳洁喷了马上好
could be cured with Windex.
六年后，我十二岁，完美的老姐雅典娜十五岁
Six years later, I was 12. Athena, my older, perfect sister, was 15.
老弟尼克十一岁
And my brother, Nick, was 1 1.
每天早晨，老爸都会教导我们希腊历史，伟大的希腊文明和伟大的希腊人
Every morning, my dad would Lecture us on the history of our people…the great civilization, the Greeks.
说出三个古代希腊发明
Now, name three things the Greeks did first.
天文学，哲学，民♥主♥政♥治♥
Astronomy, philosophy, and democracy.
好极了，非常棒
Bravo! Very good.
给我一个英文字
Now, give me a word…
任何一个，我会证明它的字源是希腊文
any word…and I show you, how the root of that word…is Greek. Sweet Lord, again.
[arachnophobia：蜘蛛恐惧症]
“arachnophobia”这个字如何？
How about “arachnophobia”?
“Arachno”来自希腊文蜘蛛
“Arachno” that comes from the Greek word for spider…
“phobia”也是希腊文，意思就是“恐惧”
and “phobia” is a phobia, it means “fear.”
所以，加起来是“怕蜘蛛”的意思
So, “fear of spiders.” There you go.
好吧，波托卡洛斯先生
Okay, Mr. Portokalos,
[kimono：和服]
“kimono”怎么样？
how about the word “kimono”?
– “Kimono” – 好样的，kimono…
– “Kimono.” – Good one. kimono…
当然了“kimono”是来自希腊文的…
Of course, “kimono” comes from the Greek word…
“cheimonas”意思是“冬天”
“cheimonas” which means “winter.”
那么，冬天要穿什么…
So, what do you wear in the wintertime…
来保暖？一件袍子
to stay warm? A robe.
你瞧“袍子”“和服”懂了吧
You see, “robe” “kimono” There you go.
– 再见 – 再见，波托卡洛斯先生
– Bye-bye. – Goodbye, Mr. Portokalos.
图拉
Toula!
你该以身为希腊人为荣
You should be proud to be Greek.
过了几年
A couple more years went by…
老爸把奶奶从希腊接来和我们一起住
and my dad brought his mother from Greece to live with us…
大概觉得我们家还不够怪
because we weren’t weird enough.
土耳其鬼，别想绑♥架♥我(希腊语)
老公(希腊语)
抓住她(希腊语)
– 她要去哪里？ – 妈，希腊人和土耳其人现在已经是朋友了
– Where is she going? – Mama, please! The Greeks and the Turks friends now.
我们告诉奶奶战争结束了
We told my grandma the war was over…
她还是把匕♥首♥放在枕头下
but she still slept with a knife under her pillow.
不要打我！
Stop hitting me!
小心，尼克，她很凶的
Niko, be careful. She has a very mean punch.
即使一个好希腊女孩，如果找不到老公
Nice Greek girls who don’t find a husband
只好在家里开的餐厅干活儿
work in the family restaurant.
所以，我在这里，日复一日，年复一年
So, here I am, day after day, year after year.
我三十岁了，早就过了保鲜期
Thirty, and way past my expiration date.
天啊，冷死人了
My God. It’s freezing.
图拉
Toula!
昨晚是你打烊，今早又是你开店？
You closed last night, you’re opening this morning?
我最有空
I have no life.
图拉，有心事要跟妈说
Toula, you talk to me sometime.
妈，你把我变猪头了啦
Ma, you’re gonna make me swallow my tongue.
图拉
Toula!
妮姬在吗？
Is Nikki here?
怎么呢？
What’s up?
妮姬要帮我卷头发
No, my Nikki. She was supposed to come over to curl my hairs.
尼克检查过肉的新鲜度吗？
Nick, did you check the meat before you signed for it?
– 老爸检查的 – 最好是新鲜的
– Dad checked it. – It better be fresh.
我老弟有两个工作
My brother bas two jobs,
掌厨及娶希腊处♥女♥作老婆
to cook and to marry a Greek virgin.
舞拉，上班前先吃点东西
Voula, have something to eat before you go to work.
不了
No
如果“唠叨”是奥♥运♥项目
If nagging was an Olympic sport,
舞拉婶婶会拿金牌
my Aunt Voula would have a gold medal.
塔奇
Taki,
你就不能等我吗？
you couldn’t wait for me?
对不起
Sorry.
不要来这一套
Sorry, sorry. Don’t “sorry” me.
你看疹子，有人给我白眼
Look at this. Rash. Somebody gave me the mati.
– 喷稳洁 – 拜托啦
– Put some Windex on it. – Oh, Gus, please.
舞拉，有效耶
Voula! This works.
昨晚我的脚趾肿的跟脸一样大
Last night, my toe was as big as my face.
不会吧
No
为什么不等我？
Why you not wait for me?
加斯，他要跟我谈
Gus. He wants to talk.
无论如何，我都要告诉她…
Anyway, I tell her…
– 我准备让她去希腊找个老公 – 她并不算老
– I will send her to Greece to find someone. – She’s not too old.
还好
She’s okay.
到了希腊，别透露她的年龄
In Greece…don’t tell anyone how old she is.
– 她不肯去 – 不肯去？
– She won’t go. – She won’t go?
她不想结婚
It’s like she don’t want to get married.
孩子们，去找尼克舅舅
Come on, boys. Go in there.
我老姐结婚得早
My sister married young
她变成制♥造♥希腊宝宝的机器
and became a Greek baby-breeding machine.
快走，孩子们
Hey, guys. Come on, get out.
我只能喝杯咖啡
Just a quick coffee.
要送小孩去打冰上曲棍球
I have to drop the boys off at hockey
然后去百货公♥司♥
and then I got to get to the Jewel.
要面包吗？丝♥袜♥特♥价♥九毛九
Bread? Pantyhose are on for 99 cents.
神父要过来为新房♥子祈福，我得做炸四角
Then the priest is coming to bless the new house, so I have to make diples.
– 你相信吗？家里没蜂蜜了，帮我放回去 – 放下我的沙基奇
– Can you believe it? I’m out of honey. Put that back for me. – You dropped my tzatziki.
– 安吉罗 – 闭嘴，妮姬
– Angelo! – Nikki, shut up.
我堂兄妹有两种音量
My cousins have two volumes,
“很吵”和“吵死人”
Loud and Louder.
– …你那大屁♥股♥女友，谢谢，图拉 – 不客气
– …your big-ass girlfriend. Thanks, Toula. – Sure.
嗨，图拉，我们没有迟到很久
Hey, Toula. We’re not that late.
大家好
Hi, everybody.
妮姬，你没来帮我做头发
Nikki, how come you didn’t come to curl my hair this morning?
妈，我得送老公上班