怪怪家庭（2012）

你有多少勋章
How many patches do you have?
全都有 -艾迪
All of ’em. – Hey, Eddie.
这是我爸爸
This is my dad.
明斯特先生
Ah, Mr. Munster.
我喜欢你的项链
Oh, I like your necklace.
是不是… 那是什么啊
Is that a… What is that?
要是不缝好 我女婿连头都会忘带
My son-in-law would forget his head if it wasn’t sewn on.
就是一个…
Uh, it’s a…
一个玩意儿
it’s a… a thing.
这是艾迪的爷爷 爷爷
This is Eddie’s grandpa, Grandpa.
我有传染病
I have a disease.
艾迪 你喜欢野营吗
So, you like camping, Eddie?
艾迪喜欢在野外自♥由♥奔跑
Eddie likes to run wild in the wild,
如果你懂我的意思
if you know what I mean.
喜欢
Yes.
野生探险狂欢节就在眼前
Wildlife Revelry is just around the corner.
你也许会见到一些老朋友
You might see some of your old friends.
你有没有说过你原队的编号♥
Did you say what your old pack number was?
探险队还有编号♥
Do the packs have numbers?
有啊 就缝在…
Yeah, they’re sewn right on your…
你这里没有 -肯定是掉了
Oh, yours doesn’t have one. – Must’ve fallen off.
地心引力啊
Gravity, eh?
明斯特先生 说句话
Mr. Munster, can I talk to you?
我本质上并不多疑
I’m not a suspicious person by nature,
但是我猜你不希望我知道
but I’m assuming there’s a reason
艾迪原来的队编号♥ 必定事出有因
you don’t want me to know Eddie’s old pack number.
110 -110
Pack 110. – Pack 110?
他不记得那个晚上了
He doesn’t remember that night.
那他记得什么 -只有我们告诉他的部分
Well, what does he remember? – Just what we told him.
谎言居多
Lies, mostly.
他知道有只熊宝宝
He knows there was a baby bear.
我不记得熊宝宝了
I don’t remember the baby bear.
我的心为他难过
Oh, my heart feels for the boy.
真的吗
Does it?
停
Stop.
那是谁
Who is that?
我妈妈
That’s my mom.
你的心刚才漏跳了一拍吗
Did your heart just skip a beat?
我们都要清楚自己在生命链中的位置
We all must know our place in the circle of life.
鹿吃草
The deer eats the grass,
有朝一日 鹿死掉了
and someday, when the deer dies,
会滋养土地 使更多的草生长
he’ll fertilize the ground so more grass will grow,
更多的鹿有草吃
so more deer can eat.
你确定学这个能得勋章
Are you sure there’s a patch for this?
生命链勋章
It’s the circle of life patch.
漏掉了一个重要的中间环节
There is an important intermediary step that we are missing here.
鹿吃草 自己又被吃掉
The deer eats the grass and then is itself eaten,
吃掉鹿的动物死亡后
and then the thing that ate it dies
会滋养土地 使更多的草生长
and fertilizes the ground so more grass can grow,
更多的鹿有草吃 然后…被吃掉
so more deer can eat and then… be eaten.
但是有些鹿可以活得长久
But some deer can live long lives.
不会的
Nope.
还有一个环节是这样
Also, as an intermediary step,
有些鹿想被吃掉
sometimes deer want to be eaten.
它们孤单忧郁
They’re depressed and lonely,
所以那头狮子其实是帮了它一个忙
so that lion’s doing the deer a favor.
那头鹿看起来不忧郁
That deer didn’t look depressed.
我知道 我仿佛看到它在笑
No, I know. I thought I saw it smile.
有什么东西吃狮子吗
Does anything eat the lion?
爷爷
Grandpa.
这是天性
It’s nature.
妈妈 我觉得爷爷有些不对劲
Mom, I think something’s wrong with Grandpa.
他脱掉所有的衣服 然后吃了一头狮子
He took off all of his clothes, and then he ate a lion.
不是在动物园里吧
You weren’t at the zoo, were you?
在森林里
The forest.
爷爷和玛丽莲正在给我讲
Grandpa and Marilyn were teaching me
生命链和有自杀倾向的鹿
about the circle of life and suicidal deer.
生命链是很残酷的
The circle of life is a violent shape.
在爷爷讲来确实是
It is when Grandpa’s drawing it.
爷爷只是想让你明白
Your grandpa is just trying to help you understand
生命是有秩序的
there’s an order to life,
所以不要因为熊宝宝袭击人而恨它们
so you don’t hate the baby bears when they attack.
我不恨那只熊宝宝
I don’t hate that baby bear.
它可能只是又饿又困惑
It was probably hungry and confused.
一点没错
That’s exactly right.
熊宝宝非常困惑
That baby bear was so confused,
完全搞不清自己在做什么
it couldn’t possibly know what it was doing.
它又没有闯到人群密集的地方去
It’s not like it wandered into a populated area.
我想起一件事
Which reminds me.
如果爷爷要开始吸血
If Grandpa’s gonna start drinking again,
我们不应该警告邻居们吗
don’t you think we should warn the neighbors?
玛丽莲告诉你的
Marilyn told you.
爷爷吃那头狮子时告诉我的
Grandpa told me when he ate a lion.
我猜他想让我看见他吃那头狮子
I think he wanted me to see him eat that lion
好让我习惯他吃大的东西
so I can get used to him eating something big.
关于生命链 爷爷想让你知道的是
The thing Grandpa wants you to know about the circle of life
他碰巧身处生命链之外
is that he happens to be standing outside of it.
那你呢
Are you inside it or outside?
我是我父亲的女儿
Well, I am my father’s daughter.
你不会也要吃人吧 妈妈
You wouldn’t try to eat somebody, would you, Mom?
如果我吃了那也是天性
It would be natural if I did.
我生来就是捕食者 不是猎物
It’s in my nature to eat and not be eaten.
你会吗
Would you?
我尽量不去吃人
I try my best not to.
幸好我不像你
I’m glad I’m not like you.
下面我要说的话 我会平心静气地讲
What I’m about to say I will say calmly,
彬彬有礼
with even-tempered civility.
但是你应当将我的礼貌理解为强烈反对
However, you should interpret my politeness as severe disapproval.
为什么那个人在刷房♥子
Why is that man painting the house?
为了一块饼干 人会做些什么
What people will do for a cookie.
你在饼干里放了什么
And what did you put in those cookies?
我烤饼干时可能割到了自己
I might’ve cut myself whilst baking.
别把邻居变成你的血奴
Don’t turn the neighbors into your blood slaves.
所以你一路跑出来
So you came all the way out here just
就是为了抱怨邻居太帮忙
to complain about helpful neighbors.
是为了埃迪
This is about Eddie.
所以你是反对我对外孙开诚布公
So it’s an open, honest dialogue with my grandson you disapprove of.
你这哪里是开诚布公
You’re not being open and honest.
你简直是诡秘惑人
You’re being weird and confusing.
你光着屁♥股♥吃掉了一头狮子
You ate a lion while naked.
狮子也没穿衣服 我是以礼相待
The lion was naked. It seemed polite.
埃迪是个敏感的小男孩
Eddie is a sensitive young man.
你不需要因为过去教导他的方式苛责自己
You shouldn’t be too hard on yourself for bringing him up that way.
你又不知道 你怎么会知道
You didn’t know. How could you?
玛丽莲之后 我们都抱了最坏的打算
After Marilyn, we all assumed the worst.
他出生时是和我一样的
He was born just like I was.
没错 正是我们最坏的打算
Yep, that’s the worst we were assuming.
我的儿子和我的心脏
My son and my heart
是仅有的两件令我感到真正属于我的东西
are the only two pieces of me that ever really felt like they were mine,
现在埃迪不一样了
and now Eddie’s different, and…
我的心也碎了
I have a broken heart.
你我都清楚你可以另找一颗心
Well, we all know where we can get another one,
不是吗
don’t we?
健康无比 精神百倍
Healthy as hell, feels already,
会为莉莉漏跳一拍 样样合意
skips a beat for Lily, all of it.
我们怎么和埃迪说 -照实说
What will we tell Eddie? – The truth.
就说你吸干了他的野生探险领队
That I stole the heart of his Wildlife Pack Leader
而我偷了他的心
that you exsanguinated?
正好让他学到一个新词
Well, he’d learn a brand-new word, for starters.
而且我很想知道他对此事的看法
And I’d be very curious to his views on the subject.