拜见岳父大人2（2004）

Dad, Greg deals with little kids in the ER all the time.
在急救室里 他经常照顾小孩
It’s true. They don’t call me Barry Poppins for nothing.
没错 人家叫我巴里·帕品斯不是白叫的
That’s so cute.
真可爱
Why would someone call you Barry Poppins?
为什么有人会叫你巴里·帕品斯?
They wouldn’t.
他们不会这么叫的
Now, remember, Greg, we’re Ferberizing him.
记住 格雷格 我们采用放任疗法
So unless it’s an emergency,
所以除非紧急情况
under no circumstances should you pick him up
不管他怎么哭
or coddle him in any way when he cries.
都不能把他抱到怀里来
Hmm-mmm. Okay.
好的
He’s learning to self-soothe,
他正在学习自我安慰
that means no television, no unapproved toys,
这意味着不能放电视 不能让他玩没允许的玩具
and most of all,
尤其是
no monkey business of any kind.
不能搞任何恶作剧
Is that clear?
明白吗?
No monkey business. Okay.
不做任何恶作剧 记住
Jack.
杰克
Shall we get a move on, pal-o-mino?
我们该走了
I’m ready.
我准备好啦
I love this, Roz.
我喜欢这件衣服 真漂亮
This is a great find.
找的不错
Oh, good, and it’s loose,
而且这衣服很宽松
so you can wear it even if you gain a few pounds.
你即使长胖几磅 也一样可以穿
Isn’t that lovely?
真可爱啊
Honey, are you all right?
亲爱的 你还好吗?
You look a little flushed.
你怎么脸红了?
Oh, it’s just the heat. It takes some getting used to.
哦 可能是有点热吧 过一会适应一下就好了
I’m fine. I’m going to try this on.
我没事 我会试试这件
Thank you, Roz.
谢谢你 萝丝
Now, madame,
好了 夫人
let’s find something sexy for the momma to wear.
现在我们来找几件 适合妈妈穿的性感服装吧
Look at this little number.
看看这件
Whoa!
哇
I think this will get Jack’s blood flowing.
我觉得这能让杰克热血沸腾
Jack would have a coronary.
这得让他犯心
I thought so.
我想也是
Oh, Dina, talk to me.
哦 迪娜 和我讲讲
What’s really going on with that man?
那家伙到底怎么啦?
He seems very uptight.
他看起来似乎极端保守
Jack’s always been a little wound up.
杰克总是有点紧张
His job was very stressful.
他的工作很容易让人有压力
Being a florist is stressful?
做花匠很容易紧张?
There’s more to it than people think.
比人们想像的要容易
Mmm-hmm.
嗯
If you don’t mind me asking, how is your sex life?
如果你不介意我问的话 你的性生活如何?
I can’t tell you that.
我不能告诉你那事
What’s the big deal? I’m a professional.
有什么关系 我是专业的
Dina, I’m a sex therapist,
迪娜 我是性疗学家
specializing in senior sexuality.
专攻成人性♥爱♥
I knew those weren’t yoga mats.
我就知道那些不是瑜珈的垫子
We’re not 25 any-anymore.
我们不再是25岁了
But you’re not dead, either.
可你们还没到过世的年岁啊
Lots of couples our age
很多我们这个年纪的夫妻
lack intimacy in their marriages.
都不再有亲密行为了
I didn’t say we weren’t intimate.
我不是说我们不再亲密…
There are special occasions. You know, anniversaries and…
还是有特殊情况的 比如我们的结婚纪念日
Well, on our anniversary.
对 我们的结婚纪念日
Ay-ya-yay. Nicht gut.
啊呀呀 [犹太语]不好
I beg your pardon.
你说什么?
Not good.
不好
I think that I can help you and Jack reconnect.
我想我能帮你和杰克重新开始
How?
怎么做?
Well,
这个嘛
it all starts with a little bit of, uh,
先从一点…
how shall I say, intimate contact.
怎么说呢 亲密接触开始吧
My, that tingles.
天啊 有点麻
Every pleasure in the body
身体的每种愉悦
can be stimulated through the ears.
都可以 由耳朵的刺♥激♥得来
I’d give it a shot with Jack tonight.
要是我是你 今夜我会给杰克试试看
What’s goin’ on over here?
你们在干嘛呢?
Nothing, just having some girl talk.
没什么 就是谈点女人间的私事
Roz.
萝丝
Okay. Here’s the deal, LJ.
好啦 我和你做笔交易吧 小杰克
I’m going to give you a few minutes of attention.
我会照看你几分钟
But you have to promise
但是你要保证
that you don’t tell Grandpa Jack anything, okay?
不能告诉杰克爷爷任何事
All right. Good.
就这样 很好
Okay, I don’t quite know what that means,
好啦 我不太懂那什么意思
but I’m going to trust you.
但是我会相信你
All right. Here we go.
好啦 来吧 好啦
Okay. Okay. It’s okay.
没事了
A little huggie-wuggie never hurt anybody.
抱一抱也没什么大不了的
I know we aren’t supposed to watch TV
我知道我们不该看电视
but we won’t tell Grandpa Jack, will we?
但我们不会告诉杰克爷爷 对吧?
Oh, look, look, it’s Elmo.
哦 看啊 看啊 是阿蒙
Do you like fishes?
你喜欢鱼吗?
You don’t like fishes?
你不喜欢鱼?
No. All right.
不? 好啦 好啦
Okay. Okay.
好啦 好啦
Hey, I got an idea.
嘿 我有个主意了
Let’s see what pre-approved genius toys Grandpa Jack has
让我们看杰克爷爷 这个有趣的大篮子里面
in his big basket of fun. Mmm?
有什么允许玩的天才玩具吧?
Oh, look, look, it’s a… it’s a… an abacus.
看 是算盘
Abacuses aren’t that much fun, are they?
看来算盘不怎么有意思 对吧
I don’t know why people think they’re fun.
我也不知道人们为什么会觉得这有趣
Look at this! Look! It’s… it’s bolts on a plank.
看这个 木板上面有一些螺栓
Hmm? Fun bolts. No, not very fun.
有趣的螺栓 不有趣吗?
Hey.
嘿
A little birdie!
一只小鸟
Look, he sings.
看 还在唱歌♥
# And if that mockingbird don’t sing #
如果那笨鸟不唱歌♥
# Then Greg is going to buy you a diamond ring #
格雷格会给你买♥♥个…大钻戒
# And if that diamond ring gets sold #
如果钻戒被…卖♥♥光
# Greg’s gonna feel like a big asshole #
格雷格会觉得像个大混♥蛋♥
Asshole.
混…蛋
No, no, no, you don’t want to say that word.
不 你不能说那个词
We don’t want to say that. That’s a bad word.
我们不该说那个词 那是脏话
Asshole.
混…蛋
No, no, no.
别 别 别
I thought this was a repair shop.
我还以为这是家修理厂
Oh, this is better.
哦 这比那好
That’s Isabel’s son, Jorge.
那是伊莎贝尔的儿子 霍黑
15 years old, he can fix anything.
只有15岁 他什么都能修
Hey, Bernie.
嘿 伯尼
Yo! Georgie boy!
嘿
So, I think you got a tear in the bilateral valve.
我觉得双向筏上有个洞
15, huh?
15岁?
Genius.
天才
Jorge, what did I tell you?
霍黑 我告诉过你什么?
No more tinkering
别再干那些修修补补的活了
until you finish your science homework.
先把科学作业完成
Oh.
哦
Uh, I was going to finish it
我本来是要做的
but, uh, Mr. Gerson is out with, uh, rickets.
但是葛森先生因为软骨病休息了
He said definitely don’t do it
他说在他病好之前
until his rickets are… are cured.
不要做那作业
And, you know, l… l… I really…
你知道 我是真的…
Who knows if he’s ever telling the truth?
谁知道他说的是不是实话
Bernie,
伯尼
I made chimichangas. You guys want?
我做了墨西哥春卷 你们想不想吃啊?