耍酷一族（1995）

The proprietor of Fashionable Male
– 香农·汉密尔顿？ – 你认识那个家伙？
beat a rain check into my stomach.
Shannon Hamilton? You know that guy?
我和他约过会
I went out with him after we dated.
有次他搞得我非常不舒服
He tried to screw me somewhere very uncomfortable once.
– 在大众汽车后座？ – 听起来像碟机一样
What, like the back of a Volkswagen?
– 你能起来吗？ – 我仍然容光焕发吗？
Sounds like his M.O.
Can you get up? Am I still glowing?
你几乎不能呼吸，蕾娜牵涉其中？
You’re barely breathing. Was Rene involved in any of this?
这是独♥立♥侵犯行为
This was an independent act of aggression.
他说他的意图是要搞我的前任女朋友
He told me that his intentions were
– 要插她身体最污秽的洞 – 这像他的语气
to penetrate my ex-girlfriend…
in the most notorious of body cavities. Sounds just like him.
– 你最好去告诉蕾娜 – 让他去做他要做的
Oh, you better tell Rene. Let him do whatever the hell he wants.
如果她看不出他的为人，那她就该倒霉
If she’s not smart enough to see him for what he is,
she deserves the discomfort.
此外，今天我也够倒霉的
I, on the other hand, have had just about
all the discomfort I can stand for a day.
我迟到了，我得走了
Oh, shit, I’m late. I gotta go.
你和他要离开这里？
You’re just gonna leave with him in this condition?
我必须走，你会没事的？
I gotta split. You gonna be okay?
屁♥股♥下有腿，我很好
Couple of pins in the hip, I’ll be good as new.
是我的男孩，再见，伙计
That’s my boy. Bye, guys. Be good.
女人总是在你失意时离开
Women, always leaving you when you’ve just had the crap kicked out of you.
看来你拖住我了，你留在这里
You look like you’re gonna live to me.
我要去冲洗手间
You stay here. I gotta hit the bathroom.
请别说“冲”
Please, don’t say “hit!”
好了，亲爱的
All right, honey.
别忘记星期日找寻复活节彩蛋
Don’t forget to look for your Easter eggs on Sunday.
再见，复活节兔子
Bye-bye, Easter Bunny.
好，下一个是谁？这身穿戴真热死人！
All right, who’s next? It’s hot in this god-damn suit!
嗨，各位，请排队
Hey, guys. Wait in line like everybody else.
– 怎么了？ – 这是鲍迪给的
What the hell is this?
This is for Brodie.
他在这里
He’s here.
– 什么？ – 他和鲍迪
What? Him and Brodie.
别担心，他正要离开
Don’t sweat it, though. He’s leaving. Oh.
看来他对整件事很沮丧
He seems really broken up over this whole thing.
也许因为我们这次分手是永久的
Maybe because we’re broken up for good this time.
记得我抛弃T.S.时，还很好 直至他跟你约会
I remember when I dumped T.S.
I was all right with it till he started dating you.
– 有点妒忌？ – 起先如此
A little jealousy residue?
I thought so at first.
然后我明白不仅如此
Then I realized it was more than that.
当我看见他和你一起后
When I saw how he was with you,
你俩彼此真是如鱼得水
how well you two complemented each other…
终于使我发觉失去TS很可惜
it finally hit me that T.S. is a great catch.
– 格温，你总是欺骗他 – 年轻人总反复无常吗
Gwen, you were always cheating on him.
这不表示我不后悔
Capricious youth?
Doesn’t mean I wasn’t regretful about it.
格温，我此时要想的最后一件事
Jesus, Gwen. The last thing I need at this point…
是我爱情生活上的教训
is a lecture on my love life.
好男人很稀少
All I’m saying is that the really good guys are few and far between.
事实上，自T.S以后我没有遇见一个
In fact, I haven’t met one since T.S.
即使遇见，我会以他作比较
Even if I did meet one, I guarantee I’d use him as the basis for my comparison.
如果你想要他，你会拥有他
You can have him if you want him.
相信我，我可以考虑
Believe me, I might consider trying…
遗憾的是他太在乎你了
if he weren’t so hung up on you.
我要回家了
Well, I gotta get home.
祝你的节目成功，再见
Have a great show. Okay. Bye.
巧克力卷？
Chocolate-covered pretzel?
这是罗迪，斯维林先生的助手
This is Roddy, Mr. Svenning’s assistant.
斯维林先生想和你谈谈
Mr. Svenning would like to have a word with you.
– 在哪里？快要溶了 – 在舞台旁边
Where? Ah, these are melting.
Copy that. By the stage.
告诉他我一会儿就到
Tell him I’ll be there in a minute.
– 你想什么？ – 我不相信
What do you think? I don’t trust it.
也许他冷静下来了，我们会理性地谈谈
Maybe he’s calmed down a little bit. We’ll talk reasonably.
你应该去那里给他点厉害
Reasonably, shmeasonably. You should go over there and give him shit.
开玩笑？我想娶他的女儿
You kidding? I’m trying to marry his daughter.
因此你不能大声骂他，但是对他所做的
All right, so you can’t scream at him, but after all he’s done…
– 仍然应该对他不客气 – 你建议我怎么做？
you should still kind of stick it to him.
How do you propose I do that?
– 你用臭掌对付他 – 臭掌？
You stink-palm him. Stink-palm?
你把手放到屁♥股♥上
Take your hand and you stick it in your ass like this.
你走了一整天，又紧张
You’ve been walking all day and you’re also nervous
还出了一身臭汗
and no doubt you’re sweaty as hell.
你应该看看自己
You should see yourself right now.
大男人还把手放进裤内
A man with his hand in his pants.
我或许像我老爸
I probably look like my old man.
然后与他握手
Now you shake hands with the guy.
– “嗨，斯维林先生，你好吗？” – 要强调的是什么？
“Hey, Mr. Svenning. How’ve you been?”
What’s the point?
要了解那股臭味要多久才消失？
Know how long it takes for that smell to come off?
任你怎样擦洗，至少臭两天
Scrub all you like, it’ll stick around for at least two days.
他怎样向同事和家人解释？
How does he explain it to his colleagues and family?
他们一定以为他不会擦屁♥股♥
They’ll think he doesn’t know how to wipe his ass properly.
你自己的一只手也会同样臭？
Meanwhile, you yourself are left with a hand that smells like shit?
为了对付仇敌，这是小代价
Small price to pay for the smiting of one’s enemies.
– 我放弃 – 帮帮忙
I think I’ll pass. Do me a favour.
呆在这里，我去跟他谈
Stay here while I go talk to him.
我保证今晚的节目一定顺利
I assure you, tonight’s program will go off without a hitch.
但愿如此，吉德
I hope so, Jared, for your sake.
你挑选了一个危险的商场主办节目
You picked a dangerous mall to host a game show in.
听说复活节兔子今天早晨被挑衅
I hear the Easter Bunny was accosted this morning.
如果有任何类似
If there’s anything even remotely resembling
州长舞会的那种麻烦
the trouble you had at the Governor’s Ball…
你就去主持彩票游戏吧
you’re gonna be hosting the Lotto drawing
那将是你终生的事业
on public access the rest of your career.
先生们，请相信我
Gentlemen, please trust me.
我已做了必要的防范
I have just taken the necessary precautions…
确保一切顺利进行
to insure everything will go smoothly.
Hmm?
没什么，不用担心，是测试音响！
Nothing to worry about. Sound test!
我告诉你什么，为什么不…
I tell you what. Why don’t…
不如在节目开始的时候再见吧？
Why don’t I meet you back here around show time?
– 有人说你想见我？ – 是的
Somebody said you wanted to see me?
Yes, I did.
你熟知什么？我感觉有些疲惫
You know what? I’m feeling a little less frazzled…
我想也许我们可以聊天
and I thought maybe we might chat.
– 聊天？ – 是的，聊天
Chat? Mmm-hmm. Yes, chat.
好吧
All right, look.
我意识到前几天晚上没有很好待你
I realize that the other night didn’t go very well for you.
也意识到对那件事负有极大的责任
And I realize I’m to bear most of the blame for that.
是的
Yes, you do.
这是会使…
But hey, it was a grant that would have enabled…
电视台和我自己晋升为
the station and myself to make the leap
企业联合组织化
into syndication-viable programming…
当然，没有选择余地
leaving me, of course, with no choice…
为了向广播公♥司♥经理宣扬这个节目 还得为工作而乞求
but to peddle this show to the network execs and beg for a job.
没有大的交易
No big deal. It’s okay.
对此我很抱歉
And for that I’m sorry.
但是为了这，惩罚博兰蒂和我，我们的关系
But to penalize Brandi and I, our relationship, for that…
没有一些其他的方法吗？
Come on, isn’t there some other way?
我不介意
I’m afraid not.
我的意思是可否问问博兰蒂与我结婚的事
I mean, I can’t exactly ask Brandi to marry me if…
与你结婚？
Marry you?
是的，我们到了佛罗里达州后 我要她与我结婚
Yeah, I was gonna ask her to marry me when we got to Florida.
Oh…
你知道…
You know, uh…
我总感觉此事不妥 我必须独自培养博兰蒂
Uh…
I’ve always felt bad about the fact that I had to raise Brandi on my own.
她母亲离开我们时，博兰蒂只有三岁
Her mother, she left us when Brandi was only 3.
她母亲是有点不成熟
Well, her mother was a little immature.
她只有15岁，就怀了她
She was only 15 at the time she had her.
当然，我只有14岁，但这是另一个故事
Of course I was only 14. But that’s another story.
总之，她离开后，只有我们俩
Anyway, ever since she left it was just the two of us.
事实上，我已使我自己自豪
But I’ve prided myself on the fact…
我已慢慢地灌输她一些强烈的价值