甘草披萨（2021）

No, I’m partners with Gary now.
对了 那个手撸男
Oh, the “Hand Man.”
他要求你给他撸过吗
Did he try and get a hand job from you?
有 他总是问我
Yeah, he’s asking all the time.
行啊 你算是接过了我的接力棒啊
Good. I’ll pass the baton off to you.
再见了 Frisbee
Okay, I’ll see you later, Frisbee.
好的 帮我跟你姐姐们打招呼
Okay. Say hi to your sisters for me.
我给您形容一下 就像一张蹦床
I could describe the sensation as a soft, spongy, slow-motion trampoline
只不过有更加柔软 缓慢的波动 没那么有弹性
without the great bounce.
更性感一点
Sexier.
说得再性感一点
Sexier. Make it sexier.
但也没有…
But there’s no…
闭嘴 我不想…
Shut up. – I can’t…
有没有实体店我可以试着躺一下的
There’s no floor model for me to try?
目前还没有呢 但我们有退货政策
No, but you can get the bed
如果您不喜欢 退掉就好了
and if you don’t like it, we can do a money-back guarantee.
Alana 你能不能更性感一点
Alana, you have to be sexier
你这样说他不会买♥♥的
or he’s not gonna buy it. – I think I just wanna
我在考虑一下吧 有需要我会打电♥话♥的
think about it for a while, then maybe I’ll give you a call back.
别让他挂电♥话♥
Don’t let him get off the phone.
您叫什么名字
What’s your name?
呃 Ted
Uh, Ted.
Ted
Ted.
是我
Yes.
哦 Ted 名字真好听
Oh, Ted, I love that name.
好吧
Okay…
我叫Alana
My name’s Alana.
你好 Alana.
Hi, Alana.
我来你家 为你安装水床 好不好
Can I come and install the bed for you?
什么
What?
我帮你安装 告诉你怎么用
I’d lay it down and show you how it works.
水床动起来 就像海浪
It moves in a similar way to the ocean…
里面湿漉漉的
wet inside.
可能一开始有点不习惯 但一旦你喜欢上这感觉 Ted
And it takes some getting used to, but once you’re in there, oh, Ted,
你就不会想问这么多问题了
I don’t think you’re gonna be asking any questions.
你成功地把这张床卖♥♥给我了Alana
Sounds like you just sold a waterbed, Alana.
说说吧 你几时能把水床送来我家
Tell me, what time can you be over with that bed?
哎哟 还挺着急
Oh, well. Eager.
你得等我下了班吧
I have to wait until my work is done.
是吗
Oh, yeah?
嗯 我的老板又老又坏 他强迫我没日没夜地工作
Yeah. I have a mean, old boss that makes me work all day.
你跟你老板胖伯尼说清楚 你有事要先走一步
Why don’t you tell Fat Bernie you have work to do and get out of there?
Ted 你可不知道 胖伯尼可讨厌了
Oh. Fat Bernie is so mean, Ted.
听起来就很讨厌啊
Sounds like it.
他把我关在这里 不让我出去
He keeps me locked up inside.
但是Ted 我跟你说
But you know what, Ted?
你说
What’s that?
你一定会喜欢我们的水床的
I know you’re gonna love our wet beds.
你知道买♥♥水床还送什么吗 送什么
You know what they come with? – What’s that?
木头床头板
A wood headboard.
木头硬硬的 顶在墙上
And that wood is strong and sticks straight up against the wall.
听上去不错啊
That sounds great.
我们不送床头板
We don’t have wood headboards.
我现在把你转给我的同事 Kirk
I’m gonna hand you off to my associate, Kirk,
他会记录你的收♥货♥信息
and he’s gonna take down all your information,
待会我就过去给你送货 Ted
and I will be at your place later, Ted.
感谢您致电胖伯尼 祝你愉快
Thank you for calling Fat Bernie’s. Have a nice day.
你承诺什么啊 我们现在还没有床呢
What are you doing? We don’t have beds.
那就快去进货啊
Well, we better get some,
水床不过是塑料袋里装上水的水气球
because water in a plastic bag is a water balloon.
再加上个架子 就是床了
With a frame, it’s a bed.
我们去北区伐木场
Let’s just go to Northridge Lumber,
他们那边有很好的… – 我的脚本话术写得很好 是你自己扯远了
they have real good… – I wrote good dialogue. You’re improvising too much.
你让我说得性感一点啊
You told me to make it more sexy.
是 但我只是让你语气性感点
I told you to make it more sexy, I didn’t tell you,
没让你承诺去别的男人家上他的床啊
“Go over to the guy’s house and get in his bed.”
Gary 我跟你说过 我很擅长做戏
I told you I’m a good actress, Gary. I told you.
别让我更性感
Don’t tell me to make it more sexy, man.
你要性感 我就给你更性感
If you want it more sexy, I’ll make it fucking horny.
我们有着自己的想法
We just have our own dreams and ideas.
那我们就这样
And so we’ll just…
不管她问什么 你就回答是 嗯 就可以
So, just say yes. To whatever she asks you, just say yes.
比如说 她问你会唱歌♥吗 你说会
Let’s say, if she asks you if you can sing, say yes.
问你会跳舞吗 你说会
If she asks if you can dance, say yes.
唱歌♥跳舞我本来就会啊
I can sing, and I can dance.
我知道你会
No, I know. I know. I know.
我就是告诉你一声 如果她问到
I’m just saying that if she asks you
一些你可能不太会做的事情
if you can do something that you might not know how to do,
你也说你会
just say yes.
反正拿到角色之后
Because you can always learn how to do something
他们会找人再来教你的
once you get the part.
不管她说什么 你只要给出肯定的回答就可以了
So just say yes to whatever she asks.
问什么你都说会
Whatever she asks, just say yes.
说会 说会 – 行了 我知道了
Just say yes, just say yes… – Okay, I got it.
好吧
Okay.
你好 Janice – 你好 Gary
Hi, Janice. – Hi, Gary.
Mary – 哦 亲爱的
Mary. – Oh, darling.
Gary告诉我
So, Gary tells me that you’ve been studying
你一直在跟Milton Farmer学习表演
at Everywoman’s Village with Milton Farmer.
是的
Yes.
我喜欢他对于年轻演员的调♥教♥
I love his work with young actors.
他是个厉害的人
He is a miracle worker.
你笑起来真温暖
You have a warm smile,
温暖的笑容是种力量
which is very powerful.
你这犹太人的鼻子也很显眼
And you have a very Jewish nose,
现在很流行这种长相
which is becoming very fashionable.
现在有很多工作
I am getting a lot more requests
都特别要求犹太女孩
for Jewish girls.
是吗 那太好了
Really? That’s great.
不
No.
不
No.
不
No.
给Tatum带好
Love to Tatum.
你擅长运动吗
Are you athletic?
你的身材很紧实
You seem to have a very firm body.
是的
Yes.
你会骑马吗
Do you know how to horseback ride?
会
Yes.
哦 你会击剑吗
Uh, do you know how to do fencing?
会的 我会击剑
Yes, I can fence.
篮球会打吗 – 会
Basketball? – Yes.
棒球呢 – 会
Baseball? – Yes.
足球会踢吗 – 会
Soccer? – Yes.
你还会其他我不知道的运动吗
Any other sports or special skills that I should know about?
我会马伽术
I studied Krav Maga.
那是什么玩意 什么是马甲树
Well, I don’t know what that is. What is “Quick Draw McGraw”?
是以色列的格斗术 士兵交战时候用的
It’s martial arts from Israel. It’s used in combat.
我爸爸在以色列参军 我们家人都会
My dad was in the Israeli Army. We all know it.
格斗术是跟空手道差不多的东西吗
So it’s a form of karate, let’s say?
更像是教你如何用铅笔捅进敌人的眼睛
It’s more like, “How to use a pen to stab someone’s eye out.”
你♥他♥妈♥的挺能打啊 是不是
You’re a goddamn fucking fighter, aren’t you?
我喜欢你这性格
I like that.
我能看到你的拼劲儿
I can see that.
你穿得漂漂亮亮来了
You come here trying to be all pretty for me,
但实际上 你让我想起
but really, you remind me…
一条狗
of a dog.
一条英国斗犬
Of an English pit bull dog…
让人欲♥火♥焚身
with sex appeal…
还有
and…
你那犹太大鼻子
a very Jewish nose.
除了英语